A Second Life
by everdreaming3
Summary: There are some people who go through life just existing and not really living. Brittany Pierce was one of those people. She goes through the day to day motions of her life without much hope for the future. That is until she meets a woman that breaks her out of her dull existence and gives her an opportunity for a second life. Brittana AU. (My summaries are bad, sorry!) COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So this is probably the only note that I will have at the beginning of a chapter, and it is going to be a little long. Just bear with me!**

 **This is my AU story. This is a story that has been floating around in my head for years. Honestly, it was never going to be written. It wasn't until I put Brittany and Santana into the main roles that I realized how perfect they were for the story and it gave me the motivation to actually write it (with some minor changes, but it works better). This is a very personal story for me, and I am honestly a little nervous about sharing it with you all. I know I am definitely not the greatest writer, so I hope I did my vision justice in your opinion.**

 **Since this is AU, don't expect much of Glee to make an appearance. I obviously kept some character traits and some other bits from the show, but these are pretty much mostly my own characters. There are no other Glee characters in the story, although there are mentions of a few of them, but only one of them plays any significant role to the story. Having said that, Brittany and Santana's families and backgrounds are completely different than from the show.**

 **I sincerely hope you all enjoy this story, and please let me know what you think!**

Chapter 1

I didn't even know why I was here.

Well, actually I did. It was a horrible day to be alone. And despite moving to the Columbus area to start a job in the city a little over a year ago, I still hadn't really made any friends. I had some people I kind of talked to at work every once in awhile but that was really about it.

But what else was new? Making friends had never really been easy for me unless I had someone to help guide me through the whole meeting new people process and finding things in common to do with said people.

I hadn't had somebody in my life that could do that for a little while now. Since before I left Massachusetts, where I had lost the few friends I did have.

Which led me to be where I was at the moment.

My coworker Melanie had been raving about this new bar downtown. I had overheard her talking to another coworker, Tim, about the place that had opened last month. She said that it was really laid back, even though it looked pretty upscale, and it had a good atmosphere and strong drinks. I didn't want to go home to nobody again, particularly today. So I found myself subconsciously driving over to the bar once my work day was finished.

It wasn't even like the bar was really on my way home or anything. And I don't even drink alcohol.

I felt so stupid stepping into the swanky bar by myself. At least it could maybe look like I was meeting somebody, but if I hung around too long it would look like I got stood up. And then I would just look even more stupid.

I considered turning around and leaving almost as soon as I walked in. I was so uncomfortable and I felt so out of place.

But the thought of going home was enough to keep me headed toward the gleaming wooden surface of the bar. It was still fairly early in the day, so the bar wasn't too crowded yet. It was only Tuesday, but I was sure the after work crowd would start filing in soon. I was grateful that there were empty seats at the bar.

I hoped I could have a drink (non-alcoholic, of course) and slip out before business picked up too much. I wasn't too fond of crowds in general without someone with me, much less being somewhere I had never been before with a bunch of people I didn't know.

Seriously, why had I decided to come here? I pushed myself forward and reached the bar.

The bartender smiled at me as I removed my jacket and took a seat on a stool. He was cute and I could tell he found me attractive. I knew I wasn't bad looking, though I was self-conscious about my appearance. My blonde hair and blue eyes caught peoples' attention, but my general awkwardness in conversation tended to put people off rather quickly.

I had learned to get used to it a long time ago. Mostly.

I think he was a little disappointed when I only gave him a polite smile back and asked for a Coke. I hung my purse and jacket on the back of the seat and settled in, trying to force myself to relax. At least I was dressed appropriately for the bar. My tight dress pants, low heels, and blouse fit in with the other professionals that clearly made up the clientele.

The bartender returned with my drink quickly and, after a half-hearted attempt to draw me into some sort of conversation and my utter lack of interest in keeping a dialogue going, he moved off to the other end of the bar where a couple of women in business suits had taken up residence. I reached into my purse and discreetly took my pill. Then, after scanning the bar for anything interesting, turned myself back and paid attention to my drink.

I sat there, sipping my soda and wallowing in my own misery. I told myself that I would just finish my drink, leave an extra tip for the bartender for being a bitch to him, and then head home. It was definitely worse for me sitting here surrounded by strangers and feeling completely lonely than going home and curling up in bed and crying myself to sleep.

I thought that moving closer to my family would help me. I had been struggling for the past couple of years. It started to affect my work, and I wasn't happy at the company I was at anymore in Massachusetts. I had started there shortly after I graduated with my Master's degree in Biomedical Engineering from MIT. It was a great place to work, and I was there for a year and a half before the accident.

After that, I took a little time off. Even after I went back, I lacked enthusiasm for being there and I ended up missing more days. I didn't like being in Massachusetts anymore. I didn't have anything to stay for, especially after I had withdrawn so far into myself that the 'friends' I had made there gave up on me.

After another year of forcing myself through that, I decided to move back to Ohio. My parents had stayed in Lima, but I didn't want to move that close to them. I figured I could live a couple of hours away and they would be nearby if I needed them. Mostly I just needed a change of scenery.

I ended up finding a really good job at a company in Columbus. The pay wasn't as great as where I was before, but it still paid well. I eagerly took the position and moved into a nice little house in the suburbs. I think it was the same town where the gay kid's boyfriend in high school had gone to his prep school. It was a nice little area, and the drive wasn't too far to work.

The move helped some. I wasn't as miserable as I had been back in Massachusetts. I was happier at my new job and my new home was comforting. Being able to see my parents a little more often was nice, but I wasn't all that close to them to begin with so it wasn't like I saw them all of the time. And their company didn't really cheer my mood up that much, either. I had really just hoped the fresh start would maybe spur me into meeting new people and making friends.

My coworkers were nice, but apart from the initial attempts to get to know me when I first started a little over a year ago, no one had taken much of an interest in befriending me. Again, it wasn't like I made too much of an effort to get out of my comfort zone and hang out with them. I was really not good with people in general. Small talk was hard for me, and it took a strong person to put up with me until I became comfortable enough to really converse with them.

Needless to say, there weren't many people who made the effort to do that. That's one of the reasons why I was so lonely. I didn't really want to think about the other at the moment.

I had finished half of my drink already and was too busy thinking to myself that I didn't even notice somebody had slid up next to me until they spoke.

"I don't like seeing a beautiful woman look so sad," they said.

I turned, a little startled, to look into soulful brown eyes. I took note of the dark hair, naturally tanned skin, and full lips turned up into a slight smirk. I blushed a little at having someone's attention on me.

"Can I buy you a drink to maybe cheer you up?"

"No thanks, I can't drink," I declined with a polite smile to ensure there were no hard feelings.

"Then why are you in a bar?" The question was asked with a slight look of confusion and a little laugh.

I found the question to be a little out of line. It honestly wasn't anyone's business why I was here. My discomfort for the question must have shown on my face because before I could even say anything, a look of horror came over the other person's face.

"Oh my God, I'm sorry. That wasn't right of me to ask," they said, apologetic. Then they said quietly and a little uncomfortably, "But don't you think maybe a bar isn't the best place for you to be if you are struggling with your problem?"

I could feel my face scrunch up in confusion. What the hell was that question about? I looked at the other person, who looked back at me with concern and just a hint of pity. All of a sudden it hit me.

"No! I'm not an alcoholic or anything," I clarified quickly, offended yet wanting to make sure nobody left thinking that I had a drinking problem. Nothing could be further from the truth. Not that this stranger really deserved me to explain anything, but I decided to tell at least the partial truth. "I just never could really stomach the taste of alcohol."

A sheepish look came over the other person's face. I had to admit it was kind of cute and I softened a little. "Now I just feel like an idiot," they said, clearly embarrassed. "I am so sorry for assuming that you had a problem. Can I at least buy you another soda to make up for it?"

I hesitated. I wasn't planning on staying past my first drink, but the whole point of being here was to maybe not be alone. If I stayed and this person stuck around, clearly I wouldn't be alone. It seemed likely they would stay, and I had to admit that the fact that someone was actually talking to me made me feel a little better.

"I promise I will try not to put my foot in my mouth again. Please just let me prove to you that I am not a complete ass." This sentence was said with a flirtatious grin, though I could see the hint of genuine pleading in the brown eyes.

"Okay," I conceded, finally giving in. "But just one Coke."

"Great! My name is Gabe, by the way," he said with another grin.

"Brittany," I replied, smiling a little back.

I took in his features once again. He was incredibly attractive. He looked like he was maybe a few years younger than my 27 years. He was wearing dark slacks and a nice grey button up shirt that fit him well. It was evident he had a nice body and kept himself in good shape. His hair was a little longer but combed back and orderly. He had a hint of scruff, but that only added to his masculine appearance.

I could definitely admit that he would make most girls swoon. I would usually be a blushing, shy, incomprehensible mess around a guy as good looking as Gabe. But today I was just not really in the mood for it.

At least it meant I could handle a polite conversation and maybe he wouldn't run off due to my awkwardness.

I was just hoping that I could maybe not feel so alone by talking with Gabe for a few minutes. He seemed pretty genuinely remorseful for making a fool out of himself, and it made me actually more comfortable around him since his looks almost made him too perfect. It showed he could be human.

Gabe flagged down the bartender and ordered another beer for himself and a second soda for me. While the bartender got us our drinks, Gabe turned back to me.

"So, are you waiting for someone?" I could tell that he was trying to feel out if I was single without wanting to offend me if I had possibly been stood up. It was kind of cute the way he was being careful after he had already put his foot in his mouth.

I smiled to give him some reassurance that his question was okay. Even though the answer to the question made me a little sad.

"No, I'm not waiting on anyone," I said, straightforward in my answer. "I just heard about this place from someone at work and I didn't want to go home quite yet, so I figured I would stop in and check it out."

"Even though you don't drink," he said with a twinkle in his eye. The corners of his mouth twitched a little in amusement as the bartender set our beverages down in front of us. Gabe paid for our drinks but didn't take his attention away from me.

I rolled my eyes, although couldn't stop the wry grin that pulled at my lips. "Yes, even though I don't drink." My smile faded. "I just didn't want to be home alone right now," I nearly whispered.

I saw sadness flash across his face briefly before he replaced it with smile clearly meant to try and cheer me up. "Well, you don't have to be alone," Gabe said playfully. "I am more than happy to hang out with you. The person I was supposed to meet is running late, so we can keep talking until she gets here if you want."

I was almost a little hurt to hear that he was supposed to be meeting someone. I didn't like the idea of him flirting with me if he was seeing someone else. I don't like cheating at all. But, I didn't know his story or who he was supposed to meet, so I didn't want to judge him quite yet. But the thought of someone just trying to pick me up because their date was late was kind of off-putting.

"Oh, I don't want to keep you from your date," I said truthfully and a little nervously, ready to grab my purse and leave if some angry woman was going to come after me.

"No, it isn't like that," he began, then stopped looking bashful. "I actually would like to keep you company if you wouldn't mind. I totally am not trying to get in your pants or anything."

I studied him for a moment, debating on whether or not he was telling the truth. I definitely wasn't looking for a hookup. I honestly wasn't even looking to pick up a potential date or anything. I just wanted to not feel alone tonight.

He looked back at me without any hesitation and I could see the honesty in his eyes. He may have come over with the intention of hitting on me to begin with, but I could tell that he now legitimately just wanted to keep me company.

Apparently I had looked even more pathetic than I thought. The thought was not comforting.

I smiled gratefully at him. "I would like the company," I said quietly. "Thanks."

He gave a sweet, almost innocent smile. It was so much different than the cocky grin he had given when he first talked to me. It tugged a little at my heart. If things were different, I maybe could see myself giving in to a date with him.

"Why don't we move to a table so we can talk a little better?" Gabe asked.

I nodded in reply. We grabbed our drinks, and I gathered my jacket and purse, and we moved over to a table towards the middle of the room. The place was getting a little more crowded. It was around 5:30 now, so the people getting off of work looking to relax after a long day were starting to fill the place up.

I was glad to have some company now that there were more people around. If Gabe hadn't talked to me, I definitely would have left. Being there alone would have made me way too uncomfortable. At least it looked like I had a date or something now and didn't appear to be a complete loser.

"So Brittany," he began after we sat down, "do you work around here?"

"Not too far from here, actually," I said. "I work a few miles away."

"What is it that you do for a living?"

I smiled, legitimately pleased at the thought of my job. "I am a biomedical engineer," I replied.

His eyes widened a little. I couldn't quite tell if it was from surprise or if he was impressed.

"Wow," he said. "That is really cool. Do you like make artificial hearts or things like that?"

Okay, clearly he was impressed. I mean, I loved my job and thought it was pretty cool, but it wasn't as amazing as people thought. I wasn't making artificial organs or coming up with ways to regenerate lost limbs or anything.

I laughed a little. "No, I am not working on anything like that at the moment," I explained. "Right now I am mostly working on a device to improve on the current insulin pumps for diabetics."

"That's amazing," Gabe said in awe. "I bet you can make so many things that can save peoples' lives or just improve their day-to-day quality of life."

I blushed a little at his praise, but shook my head. "I don't do that many amazing things," I said shyly. "I've only been working in the field for a few years really, and I just started at my company about a year ago. So this is the first big project I've really been working on."

"Still," he said, unwilling to diminish his amazement of my job, "the kinds of things you can do in your work can make such a great impact for a lot of people. I respect that."

I looked down at the table, feeling my blush burn a little brighter. I was a little uncomfortable at having someone give me so much genuine praise. "Thanks," I told him quietly as the corners of my mouth turned up in a small smile.

When I looked back up he was looking at me with a real smile. It was one that made his eyes scrunch a little and dimples appear in his chiseled cheeks. I really could see myself hanging out more with him if he continued to be so nice. I honestly could use a friend after so long without anyone.

"I'm just telling the truth," he admitted with a little shrug. "I like to be honest, particularly when being honest makes a pretty girl smile."

I laughed then. "See, when you say things like that I can't help but think that you are trying to pick me up," I teased. I was definitely starting to feel more comfortable around him if I could joke around with him like that.

His cocky grin came back. "It usually works for me," he joked. "But for some reason I don't think I have much of a shot with you tonight."

I faked a look of pity to him as I tilted my head and shrugged my shoulders up. "Sorry."

He mocked being in pain as he brought his hands up to his chest. "Ouch." Then he chuckled. "I guess I will just have to live with the pain."

"Something tells me you will get over it pretty quick," I told him wryly.

He winked at me. "I guess I will have to settle for being your friend," he said cheerfully.

Even though he was so nonchalant about saying he would be my friend, it made a big impact on me. I hadn't had anyone offer friendship like that in a long time. I missed having someone I could actually really talk to. And, surprisingly, Gabe seemed like he would listen to what I had to say with an open ear. I really could see him being a great friend.

I could feel emotion start to clog my throat, and I had no idea what kind of look passed over my face but it must not have been great. Gabe's smile faded and he looked at me with concern. I fought off the stinging in my eyes at how genuinely he seemed to care about how I was feeling.

"Hey, are you okay? I didn't mean to upset you or anything," he said, reaching over and putting his hand over my own.

"No, it's okay," I said, finally getting control over myself. I smiled at him, my cheeks bunching up as happiness actually started to trickle into my chest for the first time in years. "I think I would really like to be your friend."

Several emotions flickered in his eyes. I thought I made out sadness and something else that may have been pity before kindness took over. He smiled back softly and looked into my eyes sincerely. "I think I would really like to be your friend, too," he told me. His smile grew. "You're lucky I have an open position for a new friend. And since you seem so nice, I will forego the traditional paper application and do the interview right now."

I chuckled and shook my head. "Well thanks so much," I said sarcastically. "Will you need a blood sample and urine sample as well?"

He pretended to ponder that for a moment. "I think we could just get by with the blood sample. But maybe we could skip that if you get through the interview with flying colors."

"Then I guess I better hope that I brought my A-game tonight," I said.

"First question: do you live in the city?"

"No, actually," I answered. "I live in Westerville."

His brows scrunched as he sucked in a breath through his teeth. "Oooh, that's a strike," he teased. "The suburbs are not something I like to deal with."

"Hey now," I started, acting offended, "I don't live too far away from Polaris which is technically part of Columbus. So it isn't like I live out in the middle of nowhere."

He tilted his head slightly as he considered what I said. "Okay, you have a point. It isn't too bad, so I won't hold that against you." I nodded, pleased with his decision. "Question two: do you like sports?"

I rolled my eyes. Such a typical guy question. "Playing sports or watching them?" I asked.

"Either," he replied.

"Well, apart from the soccer and t-ball I played when I was little, I was never too into playing sports," I replied. "I mostly danced growing up."

His eyes lit up a little at my confession. "So you're a dancer?"

"I was," I said with a nod. "I still dance a little bit, but not as much as I used to."

"We may have to go out sometime and see how good you are," he said with a smile.

I laughed, actually a little delighted that I may have someone to go dancing with again. "Maybe," I told him, not wanting to reveal how much I actually would like that.

"I'm sure I could convince you one day," he said with confidence. "But you didn't answer if you liked to watch sports yet."

I shrugged. "I do, but I'm not huge into it," I said honestly.

"What sports do you typically watch?"

"Well I mostly end up watching football. I am not a fan of basketball or golf or anything like that," I said, my nose scrunching up in dislike. "I don't like watching baseball on TV but I don't mind going to a game in person. And I kind of like hockey."

He suddenly grinned. "Not a bad answer."

I smiled a little but my eyebrows kind of scrunched in confusion due to his sudden happiness with my answer.

"Okay then," I said hesitantly.

"So question three: what's your favorite kind of movie?" He obviously wasn't going to explain his enthusiasm for my last answer.

"That's impossible to answer," I said, moving on. "I like pretty much any kind of movie. Whether it's action, drama, romance, horror, romantic comedy, Disney, foreign, whatever, I like all genres."

He looked impressed by that. "That is an excellent answer. You get bonus points for that."

"I'm thrilled," I deadpanned.

He laughed. "Okay, question four: what's your favorite kind of food?"

"That's a tough one, too," I replied. "I would have to say Italian. I like pasta and bread a lot. But I do love a good burger, too."

"That's kind of funny," he started to say, his lips turned up in an amused smile.

He was about to open his mouth to speak again when he was interrupted by someone behind me.

"I see you waste no time in finding other company, Gabe," the woman said dryly. "I'm only a little late and you've already picked up a woman instead of waiting for me."

I watched Gabe's eyes light up and a grin take over his mouth as he looked at the woman behind me. I felt really uncomfortable now. I shouldn't be here when he was supposed to meet someone else. He clearly really liked this woman. And she didn't sound too happy about me being here. I needed to get out of there before things got even worse and this woman wanted to beat me up for stealing her date.

I quickly stood up, not noticing Gabe's surprised look, as an apology was already rushing out of my mouth.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to intrude on your date," I hastily said. "I can go now and leave you two alone."

I turned as I spoke and for the second time tonight my eyes met soulful brown orbs. Only this time, my heart fluttered in my chest and any additional words I might have said died in my throat as I froze completely. I honestly couldn't even remember if I was going to say anything else. My mind had basically just stopped working.

The eyes stared back at me, a little wide as they locked with mine. Neither of us spoke as we looked at each other. Strange feelings rushed through my chest, leaving me confused and flustered. No one had ever affected me this way before. And I didn't know if my heart was ever going to pick up its normal rhythm again.

 **A/N 2: So there is chapter 1! I set the story in Columbus and the suburbs since I used to live there and am familiar with it. Most of the places I will mention are real. So what do you guys think so far? What do you think of Brittany? What about Gabe?**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

It felt like I was looking for an eternity. But it must have only been a matter of a few seconds, because otherwise someone would have gotten uncomfortable and said something. Right?

All I knew was that I was looking at the most beautiful woman I had ever seen in my life. Her eyes were a chocolate color. They were a little startled as she looked at me, almost as if she thought she should recognize me but was sure she had never seen me before. Her eyes looked like they could reveal her deepest secrets if someone was willing to look into them long enough.

Her dark hair was pulled back into a loose bun at the nape of her neck, and some tendrils had fallen down around her face. I had the strong urge to tuck them behind her ears and caress the smooth caramel cheeks just to see if they were as soft as they looked. My eyes travelled down to her plump lips that were slightly parted, and my heart started beating harder.

My gaze went down further and took in her attire. She was dressed in a black blazer with a white blouse, the top couple of buttons undone. Her black pencil skirt complimented the curves of her hips, and her heels made her legs look really good.

I knew I was staring inappropriately, but I couldn't seem to look away. I brought my eyes back up to hers and saw that she was still looking at me.

I could feel my cheeks start to burn as I blushed furiously. I felt as if she could read my thoughts, and she could tell that I wanted to frame her face in my hands and kiss her to see if her lips tasted as good as they looked.

That uncomfortable thought was what allowed me to finally break my gaze. I turned my head and saw Gabe smiling at us, a knowing look in his eyes. I frowned a little, confused by his smirk.

The woman was still standing in front of me, but I couldn't bring myself to look back at her. I could feel the blush still burning hotly on my cheeks and ears. I knew I looked like a complete idiot at the moment. I really hate having pale skin.

"Brittany, this is my sister Santana," Gabe explained, his voice a little amused.

 _Oh_ , I thought.

"Oh! Well, it's nice to meet you Santana," I said awkwardly, forcing myself to turn back to the beautiful brunette and offer my hand to shake with an embarrassed smile.

Santana was still staring at me, her brow a little furrowed. She looked down at my outstretched hand for a second before she shook her head slightly, as if to shake away some fog in her mind. She looked back up at my face and smiled, her eyes sparkling a little as she took my hand in her own.

"Nice to meet you Brittany," she said.

My breath caught in my throat and my face was burning even hotter as tingles shot through my body. I wasn't sure if it was the low, almost raspy voice saying my name that did it. Or it could have been the gorgeous smile that I wanted to see over and over again. Or maybe it was the fact that her skin was on mine. I could practically feel sparks between our palms as she shook my hand slowly before stuttering to a halt, her eyes opening a little wider as they flew down to look at our joined hands.

I forced myself not to caress her hand with my thumb, which I really wanted to do. Santana stood there in stunned silence for a moment, not releasing my hand, until Gabe cleared his throat.

She jumped a little before quickly dropping my hand and turning to her brother with a look of derision on her face.

"Seriously Gabe, do you have to pick up a woman every time we are supposed to meet somewhere?" Santana asked scornfully as she sat down at the other empty seat at our table.

I was a little offended by her assumption that I was planning on getting with her brother, particularly after the intense reaction I just had to her. Gabe just shrugged at her, his smirk firmly in place. "Brittany and I are just hanging out," Gabe told her. "We're only friends. Right, Brittany?"

I forced my gaze away from Santana once again, finding that I had been watching her as she sat down and focused her eyes on her brother. I looked at Gabe and saw him smirking at me now. Seriously, what was that about?

I smiled politely at him as I sat back down, hoping that Santana realized that I wasn't the kind of girl who allowed people to pick her up in bars. Even really attractive guys.

"Yeah, Gabe was just keeping me company since I didn't have anyone else to celebrate my birthday with today," I blurted out. I could feel the look of horror that took over my face. I wanted to bury my face in my hands, knowing that I just made things really awkward.

 _What the fuck_? I thought to myself. _Why the hell did I say that_?

I had no intention of trying to gain anyone's pity that I was all alone on my birthday. I could have died from embarrassment, especially after seeing the near identical looks of surprise and sadness cross Gabe's and Santana's faces.

I could definitely see the family resemblance between them. I could have laughed at how stupid I was to insinuate that they were dating if I wasn't so mortified at the moment.

Santana recovered first, a polite mask slipping in place. "Since it's your birthday, we definitely all need to celebrate," she said with a cheeky grin.

I smiled gratefully at her, glad they weren't going to bring up why I had no one else to be with on my birthday.

"Absolutely!" Gabe enthused, smiling as well. "Maybe we could even scrounge up a bar version of a birthday cake."

I laughed a little, glad that I had decided to come to the bar tonight.

"Nah, birthday girl should do a birthday shot," Santana suggested.

I almost felt like I could take a shot if Santana really wanted me to, even though I really shouldn't.

"Tana, Brittany doesn't drink," Gabe told his sister. "She doesn't like alcohol." I was thankful he said something, because I wasn't sure I could.

Santana looked a little surprised, then a little uncomfortable as she glanced around the bar. I felt the need to clarify Gabe's explanation.

"I don't care if people drink," I said. "I just never grew to like the taste of alcohol myself. So I stay away from it."

Santana looked at me and I could tell she was relieved that I wouldn't judge her if she had a drink.

"No shots for you then," she said with a smile. "I think we could find something good to celebrate with, though."

I really liked her smile. I could feel the hint of a blush on my cheeks once again. Seriously, I needed to stop that or she was going to think I was an idiot. And I definitely didn't want that. Even though she was probably straight, I knew I was already developing a little crush on her. The last thing I needed was to make her uncomfortable by being a blubbering, blushing mess around her. I really wanted to continue to hang around her.

"Thanks," I said quietly, smiling back.

"How about I go get everyone some more drinks?" Gabe asked, taking my attention away from Santana. "Another Coke for you, Brittany?" I nodded. "What do you want, Tana?"

Santana looked to her brother who had turned to her for her response. "The usual," she told him before turning away and pulling her phone out of her purse.

Gabe rolled his eyes. "One lemon drop martini coming up. I'll be right back ladies," he said and started to make his way toward the bar.

I looked back at Santana, who had finished typing something into her phone. She set the phone on the table and looked up at me. She gave a shy smile and I couldn't help but find her completely adorable. I really needed to stop.

"I'm sorry for intruding on your time with your brother," I said. I hoped she wasn't upset that I interrupted their outing. She had seemed to be a little when she first showed up, and I didn't want the rest of the evening to be affected because of it.

"No, it's fine," she answered quickly. "Really, it is. He usually ends up picking up a girl to take home when we meet at a bar anyways. I'm just glad this time he was more mature and decided to just find some friendly company instead."

I blushed a little, thinking of his initial attempt at picking me up. "I think he was interested in taking me home to begin with," I said, laughing a little. "Then I opened my mouth."

Santana frowned. "So you are interested in him?"

My eyes widened, both a little in surprise and horror. She was so far off base with that one. "No!" I said a little too loudly, startling her. I lowered my voice when I continued to explain. "No, I'm not. I mean, he's really good looking and all, but I'm not interested in hooking up with him or anything. I just meant that I am not good with social situations and I tend to make people uncomfortable so they usually run away pretty quickly. Gabe at least decided to be friendly instead."

I looked down at the table, embarrassed at my rambling. And also a little uncomfortable at having to explain my social awkwardness to a beautiful woman.

"You aren't making me want to run away," Santana said. I looked up and saw her smiling at me, her eyes sparkling again. This was my favorite smile I think. My heart fluttered again.

I couldn't stop the smile that spread across my lips in return. I don't think I legitimately smiled this much in a really long time. Santana's eyes darted across my face briefly, and her smile changed a little.

Before I could figure out what that was about, her phone beeped. She looked down and unlocked her phone. Whatever the message said made her happy, because she gave a pleased smile before typing out a quick reply.

I felt a little awkward now. It felt like the dynamic had changed between us but I wasn't sure exactly how.

I looked away from her, hoping to distract myself from the feelings that were dancing around my head. My eyes spotted Gabe, who was still over by the bar. I frowned as I noticed that he was surrounded by a group of people. There were a few women, but there were also several men who were talking enthusiastically with Gabe and trying to take pictures with him.

"Gabe seems pretty popular," I said, trying to break the silence that had settled over us.

Santana laughed a little. "He can get the occasional groupies," she said with a hint of annoyance.

I turned back to look at her, but her gaze was focused on her brother. Santana had a slight frown, but her eyes also seemed to have a look of pride as she looked at Gabe.

"Those people aren't his friends?" I asked. I had just assumed that he knew those people and that's why he was talking with them.

Santana turned back to me, surprised. "Did he not tell you?"

My brow furrowed in confusion. "Tell me what?"

Her eyebrows lifted and her mouth dropped open. "Wow," she muttered. "That's actually a big change for him."

I had no clue what was going on. It must have shown on my face because Santana hurried to explain.

"My little brother is a professional hockey player," she stated, and I could hear the pride in her voice. "He sometimes gets recognized and begged by fans for pictures and autographs. But mostly he uses the fact that he's a hockey player to pick up women."

Her voice had changed from prideful to amused and also annoyed at the last sentence.

My eyes had widened in shock at hearing Gabe was a professional athlete. It made total sense thinking about it, but I had not been expecting it. "Like NHL professional?" I asked.

Santana smiled at me and nodded. "Yeah, he plays for the Blue Jackets."

"No shit," I muttered, shaking my head a little. Then I laughed, suddenly understanding his reaction to my answer about sports earlier. "That explains a lot."

Santana lifted a questioning brow at me.

"He asked me if I liked sports earlier," I explained, an amused smile on my face. "I told him I kind of liked hockey and he got excited by that."

Santana giggled and I could swear my heart stopped at the sound. So freaking adorable. "He always gets excited when he finds someone that says they like hockey. Usually people are more into football and hockey gets a lot less attention," she said.

I nodded in understanding. I saw Gabe approaching out of the corner of my eye and turned to find him carrying all of our drinks. I stood up to help, grabbing my Coke and setting it down while he set his beer and Santana's martini on the table.

"I'll be right back," he said before turning away again and hurrying toward the bar.

"Okay," I said after him, my brows scrunching at his abrupt departure.

I sat down and took a sip of my Coke. Santana had already taken a drink of her martini and she had a pleased smile on her face.

"Is it good?" I asked her, the smile making my stomach do some funny things.

"Mmhmm, very good," Santana said, her voice a bit lower in pleasure.

My stomach flipped and I felt a little bit of arousal burn low in my belly. My cheeks started to burn at the thoughts that crossed my mind with Santana's words.

Thankfully Gabe returned at that moment with a basket of pretzels so I didn't make the moment more awkward.

"They didn't have much, but I was able to score you some birthday pretzels," he said, clearly pleased with himself as he sat down and put the pretzels in the middle of the table. "So we can all share in the celebration."

I laughed, pleased with his attempt to do something special for my birthday. "Aww, thanks Gabe," I told him.

Santana just rolled her eyes a little, but there was a little smile on her face. "Seriously little brother? A basket of pretzels was the best you could come up with?"

"Hey, I don't see you with anything better," he defended himself.

Santana smirked at him then, a hint of mischief in her eyes. "We'll see," she said mysteriously.

Gabe gave her a searching look. "What are you up to Tana?"

Santana shrugged. "Nothing," she said before she took a sip of her martini.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Uh-huh," he said, clearly not believing her.

I didn't believe her either, but I had no clue what was going on. So I just let it slide.

"So Gabe," I began, changing the subject and getting the siblings' scrutiny off of each other, "Santana told me you play hockey."

He grinned at me. "I do," he said, rightfully proud. "I play for the Blue Jackets."

I grinned back at him. "That's really awesome," I said. "What position do you play?"

"I'm a forward," he said.

"For some reason I didn't see you as a defenseman," I said with a little laugh. He struck me as more of an attacker than a defender, someone who preferred going after the goal instead of protecting it.

He smiled and shrugged. "What can I say? I like to score."

I laughed at the double meaning of his words. I noticed Santana roll her eyes. I looked at her and she appeared to be a little upset by something. Maybe because we hadn't included her in our conversation?

"So what do you do for work Santana?" I asked, trying to draw her back into conversation.

She looked at me and the little crease in her brow disappeared. She gave me a smile before she answered. "I'm a lawyer."

I lifted my brows, impressed. Clearly these two worked hard to make something of themselves. "What kind of law do you practice?" I asked, interested in getting to know more about her.

"I do corporate law," she explained. "I work for the Baker Brothers legal department."

Baker Brothers was a big financial company in Columbus. Santana must be very good at what she does to work there.

"Wow," I said, a little in awe. "That must be really interesting."

Santana shrugged, the corners of her mouth upturned slightly. "I like it. It's a challenge."

"Tana always found the most boring things interesting," Gabe broke in, teasing his sister.

"It isn't boring, Gabe," Santana defended, shooting a glare toward her brother. "Just because you can't understand it doesn't mean it is boring."

"Well it isn't like you are arguing court cases and putting criminals behind bars or anything," he argued. "Now that would be interesting."

Santana rolled her eyes and huffed. Then she noticed something behind me and her eyes lit up as she smiled. This time her smile took over her face as her cheeks bunched up and dimples appeared.

Santana stood up quickly and pulled her wallet out of her purse, digging out some bills. I turned behind me, confused as to what she was doing. I saw a cute man approaching, holding a small box with a smile on his face.

"I appreciate it, Kyle," she told the man when he finally reached them. She kissed him on the cheek and he grinned.

My heart sank a little at the interaction and I turned my eyes away.

"Well how could I refuse you?" The man laughed a little.

My eyes settled on Gabe who had a strange look on his face. My brow furrowed a little, trying to figure out what his expression was.

"I really need to get back, though," the man continued. "I left Cindy alone and the place needs closed up."

"Yeah, you better hurry then," Santana laughed. "Thanks again."

The man walked off and Santana sat down, putting the box on the table. I noticed then that it was a bakery box.

"Happy birthday, Brittany," Santana said as she opened the box.

Inside were six large, delicious looking cupcakes. My jaw dropped in surprise even as my eyes started to sting with the threat of tears. No one had ever done anything like this for me before in my life. A complete stranger had made sure that I had some sort of celebration on my birthday.

I must have been quiet for too long, because Santana started talking again in a rush. "I'm sorry there aren't any candles or anything," she rambled. "I kind of had to coerce him to hurry over here and he didn't have anything at his shop but I thought you would like it."

I looked up at her, meeting her uncertain eyes. "I love it," I said quietly, my voice thick with emotion. "Thank you so much, Santana."

She smiled at me, relieved that her gesture was appreciated. "You're welcome."

"Good job, Tana," Gabe said quietly, and Santana gave him a bashful smile as he bumped her shoulder slightly with his.

I took a moment to clear my throat and blink away the tears that had started to pool in my eyes. I couldn't believe how awesome Santana was to do this for me. Even Gabe had tried to do something to make me not have to spend my birthday alone. But Santana had gone above and beyond what any normal stranger would do.

I had no idea how I could repay her, but I knew I wanted to do whatever I could to make her as happy as she had made me on one completely miserable day.

"Come on, birthday girl," Santana said playfully. "Pick the best one and dig in."

I grinned at her and selected a chocolate cupcake with buttercream frosting, pulling it carefully out of the box. I licked my fingers where I had collected some of the frosting as I pulled out the treat. I moaned quietly in pleasure at the delicious taste.

"I have a feeling these are going to be delicious," I said eagerly.

"Kyle makes great cupcakes," Santana enthused as she pulled out a vanilla cupcake with strawberry frosting.

I tried not to let the pang at the man's name bother me. She had done this amazing, special thing for me and I needed to concentrate on that and not the fact that I was a little jealous she had kissed that guy on the cheek and was bragging about him now.

Gabe selected a chocolate cupcake with chocolate frosting and asked, "Did you want us to sing 'Happy Birthday' to you first?"

I giggled as I shook my head. "No, please. I definitely don't want the whole bar's attention on me. Not to mention we don't have enough cupcakes to go around."

"Too bad," Gabe said teasingly. "We could have gotten a rousing rendition going if the whole bar involved. Plus, Santana has a great voice."

I looked interestedly over at Santana who was staring at her cupcake, appearing to be a little embarrassed at Gabe's praise of her singing ability. She felt my eyes on her and looked up at me. I gave her a reassuring smile, and she smiled back.

"Okay, these cupcakes are meant to be eaten guys," Santana said, changing the subject.

I grinned and then eagerly took a bite of my birthday treat. The flavors hit my tongue and I rolled my eyes back and moaned at the deliciousness.

"Oh my God, that is so good," I said around the bite in my mouth.

I opened my eyes to find both Gabe and Santana staring at me, their mouths slightly open. Both of them looked a little flustered, though Santana looked to be slightly more so. I felt my cheeks burning in embarrassment at clearly making them uncomfortable with my enthusiasm for the cupcake.

"Sorry," I said quietly after I swallowed my bite. "I just really like cupcakes."

Gabe chuckled a little. "We can tell," he said.

Santana seemed to recover and she bit her lips to fight back a smile. It was hard to see with her skin tone, but I could swear her cheeks had turned a little pink.

I was feeling really embarrassed now, so I concentrated on my cupcake and took another delectable bite. Gabe had enthusiastically dug into his dessert, and Santana finally took a small nibble of her own treat.

We ate in comfortable silence for a few minutes. Gabe had finished his cupcake rather quickly and grabbed another. He devoured that one as well, shortly after I finished my own. Santana ate a little slower and was finishing hers as Gabe had started a conversation with me about what other desserts I liked.

"Well, ice cream is my favorite," I was telling him. "But I love cakes and brownies. Cookies are pretty good, but I am not really a fan of pies or custards or things like that."

"How can you not like pie?" Gabe asked, looking almost offended.

I shrugged. "I don't know, I just don't."

"Leave her alone, Gabe," Santana reprimanded. "Not everyone has to like the same things you do."

"But Tana," he whined, "it's pie!"

Santana rolled her eyes. "Grow up Gabriel."

I smiled a little at her bossing her brother around. I truly didn't think I was going to be this happy today. I was incredibly grateful I had met Gabe and Santana.

"I just wanted to thank you guys again for celebrating my birthday with me," I told them sincerely.

They both smiled genuinely back at me.

"No problem," Santana said. "I'm glad we got to be part of it."

"Yeah," Gabe agreed. "And as another birthday present, how about I get you some tickets to our next home game. We play Thursday night."

I looked at him in surprise. "Seriously?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I can get you tickets without a problem. How many would you need?"

I shrugged a little and looked at the table, uncomfortable that I had no one to go with. "Well, I don't have anyone to go with," I confessed.

The table was quiet for a moment, and I looked up to see Gabe and Santana looking at each other. They seemed to have some sort of silent conversation. I looked on in confusion until Gabe turned back to me.

"How about you give me your number and I can get in touch with you on game day to see how many tickets I need to have at the booth for you," he suggested. "Even if you come alone, I would be honored to have you there."

I looked at him and saw the honesty in his eyes. He actually really wanted me to come to his game. Going alone would kind of be weird, but I really wanted to keep Gabe as a friend. He really was nice. Besides, maybe I would be able to see Santana again if I hung out with Gabe.

I nodded. "Okay."

They both smiled at me, and I felt a little happier at my decision. Gabe got his phone out of his pocket and I told him my number so he could save it in his contacts.

He texted me after he did so I could recognize his number. I saved his information in my phone and then noticed the time.

"Holy crap," I exclaimed. "It's already after seven. I really should get home."

"Do you really have to go?" Gabe asked, a little disappointed.

"I probably should," I said regretfully. "I have about a half hour drive still."

Santana also looked a little disappointed as I stood up and put my jacket on.

"Don't forget your cupcakes," she said, closing the box and sliding it toward me.

"Are you sure you don't want one to take home?" I asked a little shyly.

She smiled at me and shook her head. "No, they're for your birthday. Take them home and enjoy them."

I grinned at her. "Thanks," I said. "I'm really glad I met you guys tonight. You've made this the best birthday I've had in a long time."

They both smiled at me again.

"I'm glad we met you, too," Gabe said. "And don't forget about Thursday."

He stood up and gave me a hug. It was always awkward for me hugging people I didn't know that well, but with Gabe I was actually pretty comfortable. He placed a chaste kiss to my cheek and I blushed a little.

"I won't forget," I promised.

Santana stood up and hugged me as well. My heart pounded in my chest as I felt her body press against mine and I wrapped my arms around her. It was one of the best feelings in the world to hold her in my arms and have her arms around me. I never wanted to let go.

Her scent enveloped me. I could smell vanilla and just a hint of cinnamon. She smelled so good. I could feel my face burn brighter at the closeness of her body to mine.

"Happy birthday again," Santana said quietly into my ear.

Thankfully she didn't kiss me on the cheek like her brother, otherwise I was sure I was going to melt into a puddle on the bar floor.

After she released me, I gave them both another shy smile and grabbed the rest of my things. I gave a small wave goodbye and headed out of the bar. As I walked out, my smile grew bigger. I still couldn't believe how this night had turned out. I hoped Thursday night was just as good.

I drove home, my mind filled with thoughts of my new friends. But mostly I thought about a beautiful lawyer who made my heart skip a beat. I hoped to see Santana again soon.

 **A/N: So that was obviously Santana at the end of Chapter 1. What do you think of Brittany's reaction to her? What about Santana? Any other thoughts?**

 **Also, I am not a biomedical engineer, a lawyer, or a hockey player, so I apologize if I totally misrepresent any of those professions. The company Santana works for is completely made up, but the Blue Jackets are a real team (although Gabe obviously does not exist). I hope you guys are enjoying this so far! Things will start picking up soon**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The next day I woke up feeling more energized and happier than I had been in a long time. Even my dogs could tell something had changed with me. I went into work with a smile on my face, which was apparently something different considering I got a few startled glances before my coworkers smiled back.

I went to my office and settled in. I couldn't get focused on work right away though. My mind kept drifting back to the previous night and I couldn't stop thinking about Santana. The way she looked. The way she smiled. The way her hand felt in mine. The way her arms felt wrapped around me. The way she smelled.

But mostly I couldn't stop thinking about the way she had made my birthday the best one I had experienced in several years. She made me feel so special and that I was deserving of something nice. That I was deserving of someone treating me well. That was what had my heart feeling like it could float right out of my chest due to its lightness.

Thankfully my project partner, Gus, was a quiet man who kept to himself. We really only ever conversed if we needed to discuss something about our work, and he wasn't the type of person to chit-chat over my sudden happy mood. I was free to daydream as long as I got some work done.

I thought about the hockey game the next day. I wanted to go, if only so I could maybe see Gabe play and hopefully get to know him a little more so we could establish our friendship a little better. I also had the growing hope that I would maybe get to see Santana again if I went.

I didn't think she would go to the game or anything, but I kind of hoped maybe she did show up. At least maybe spending more time with Gabe would give me the opportunity to get to know Santana a little more, too. I had never been affected by anyone the way Santana was affecting me. I didn't quite know how to feel about it. But I just knew that I wanted to know the woman.

I was just nervous about going to the game by myself. It would be weird sitting in the arena without having friends or a date to cheer the team on with. I also wasn't really comfortable being in a large crowd like that by myself.

I thought about inviting someone from work, but that would be weird. I didn't hang out with my coworkers. Gus was the person I knew best, but he probably would look at me like I was crazy if I asked him to go.

On my way home my sister called me. I didn't really feel like talking to her, but since she had forgotten to call yesterday on my birthday, I figured I should probably take the call.

"Hello Bonnie," I said after pressing the Bluetooth button on the steering wheel to answer the call.

"Hey Brittany, what's going on?" Bonnie sounded chipper. Bonnie always sounded chipper. She could be feeling depressed and stuffing a carton of ice cream in her face and still sound chipper. It was annoying.

"Not much," I said. "Just driving home from work."

"That's good," my sister replied, sounding distracted. "Chase, just go sit down for a minute and I'll be right there. Sorry about that Britt."

"It's okay," I told her honestly.

I was used to her talking to my seven year old nephew when she was on the phone with me. He always needed something or was getting into something he wasn't supposed to. He was an adorable kid and I indulged him when I got to see him. They lived in Georgia where my brother-in-law's family was from, so I didn't get to see them very often.

My sister and I were never really close, either. She was five years older than I was and wasn't too fond of her little sister growing up. Especially since her little sister wasn't as outgoing and fun as she was (in her opinion, of course). So we mostly just had the sporadic phone calls that were initiated by her when she had free time.

"Happy belated birthday, too," Bonnie said a little guiltily. "Sorry I didn't get the chance to call yesterday, but Adam's family decided to show up for dinner and Chase had homework he needed help with and by the time I remembered it was too late."

"No problem, Bon," I lied. "I understand."

I didn't really. I got that she had a family and a life, but even sending a text would have taken thirty seconds. My parents had both called me on my lunch break and wished me a happy birthday. It just would have been nice to hear from my sister as well. Especially since I had been having a pretty crappy day. At least until I met Gabe and Santana.

"So did you do anything special yesterday?"

"Not really," I told her. "I stopped at a new bar after work since some people at work were talking about it."

"Really? You went to a bar?" Bonnie sounded surprised, although I didn't blame her. She knew that I didn't drink and it was out of character for me.

"Yeah, I just went to check it out," I said. "I met a hockey player, too. He plays for the Blue Jackets."

"Seriously?" Bonnie asked.

"Yeah. He invited me to come to their game tomorrow night."

"Oh my God! You're going right?" Bonnie was starting to sound excited. "Wait, is he cute? Is he single?"

I couldn't help but laugh a little, even as I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, he is cute and I'm pretty sure he's single, but you know I'm not looking for anything right now," I explained.

"Britt, you need to get back out there," Bonnie said a little worried. "It's been-"

"I will do it when I'm ready, Bonnie," I interrupted.

"Okay," Bonnie gave in, resigned. "But are you going to the game?"

"I don't know," I said hesitantly. "I don't have anyone to go with and it would be weird going by myself."

"No it wouldn't," Bonnie said. "Besides, a real professional hockey player invited you to watch him play. You really shouldn't turn that opportunity down."

"I guess I will go," I conceded. I really hoped it wouldn't turn out to be a bad decision.

My sister was excited that I said I would go, but our conversation was cut short when Chase got into the pantry and spilled all of the cereal on the floor.

I was still nervous the next day about my decision to go to the game. Gabe texted me mid-morning to find out how many tickets he would need to leave for me at the booth. I told him that I would just need one.

He didn't seem to find that weird, though. He just told me he was excited that I was coming. After getting my last name to leave with the ticket booth so I could pick the ticket up when I got there, he said he had to go prepare for the game.

I left work a little early so I had enough time to go home to change and let the dogs out before I had to head back into the city. It would have been nice not to have to go all the way home, but the dogs couldn't last that long before they made a mess in the house. I know I couldn't not go to the bathroom for over twelve hours. I also really didn't want to go to the game in my work clothes.

I ate a quick dinner, made sure I took my pill, and took care of the dogs before I changed. I decided on a pair of skinny jeans and a light sweater, along with some flat, knee-high boots. It was the beginning of March and the cold weather was still hanging around, but I wasn't sure if the arena would be warm with all of the people in it. I figured if my sweater wasn't warm enough, I could always leave my jacket on.

After touching up my make-up and pulling my hair up into a neat ponytail, I was ready to go. Traffic wasn't great getting back into the city, particularly the closer I got to Nationwide Arena. I was a little afraid that I was going to be later than the 7pm start time, but I was able to find parking around 6:30.

I was surprised that I ended up not too far away from the arena near to some nice looking apartment complexes. I rushed up to the ticket booth, gave the attendant my name and collected my ticket. I made my way through the doors and, after finding where I was supposed to go, I headed down into the stands.

As I walked down the stairs I discovered that I was getting a pretty good seat. It appeared that I was going to be about rink-side by the Blue Jackets bench. I definitely couldn't complain about that. As I approached my row, I saw the empty seat that was most likely mine. Sitting next to it, I saw a woman with dark, flowing hair and caramel skin. She was wearing a Blue Jackets jersey with the name 'Lopez' on the back.

My heart started to pick up a little. Was it possible that Santana had come to the game?

I approached my row and started to make my way past the people in their seats. As I approached the empty seat, I saw the woman on the other side turn toward me. I couldn't stop the grin from spreading across my face as I saw Santana smile at me.

"Hi," I said shyly, my cheeks flushing a little as I got next to the Latina.

"Hi," she said back, dimples appearing in her cheeks as her smile widened.

"I wasn't expecting to see you here," I told her as I sat down and pulled off my jacket.

Santana shrugged. "Gabe told me you were going to come by yourself, so I said I would come to keep you company if he could get an extra ticket," she said nonchalantly.

My heart soared at her words and my blush grew a little stronger. It meant so much that Santana would come to keep me from having to be by myself. She really was amazing. I just hoped she hadn't had to cancel plans or something just so I wasn't alone.

"Thanks," I told her quietly. "I hope that you aren't missing out on something else by being here."

"No, I didn't have anything else planned," Santana reassured me with a smile. "I was probably just going to watch the game on TV or something anyways. Gabe always begs me to come to the home games, so I figured tonight was the perfect night to come."

I looked at her, a little in awe. She truly was a beautiful woman. Not only with her looks, which were stunning, but she was beautiful on the inside. I could tell when I looked into her eyes that she was a caring and kind woman who would give some lucky person her whole heart when she fell in love. Santana didn't seem like the type of person who did anything halfway.

I cleared my throat, a little awkward now that I realized I had kind of been staring at her. "So I take it you are wearing Gabe's number?" I asked, indicating the jersey she was wearing.

Santana looked down at her top before she gave a little laugh. "This is actually one of his old jerseys," she confessed.

My eyebrows rose a little in surprise. "Wow, you are wearing something a professional hockey player sweated in during a game?" I asked teasingly.

She grinned playfully back. "Well I did wash it first," she whispered conspiratorially. "But it makes it a little less special when you used to force said hockey player to play dress up with you when you were little."

I laughed delightedly at that. "You didn't?" I asked incredulously, my smile refusing to go away.

Santana giggled and nodded her head. "Oh, I did," she said surely.

I wanted to keep talking to her, but the lights dimmed and the announcer started introducing the team, and the arena got too loud to keep a conversation going.

We both cheered for the Columbus team. To be honest, I didn't even pay attention to where the other team was from. I was mostly just looking for Gabe and trying not to have my eyes stray to the woman next to me too often.

Once the game started it quieted down a bit, but I didn't know how to start another conversation with Santana. We watched the game for a few minutes, until Santana leaned over to tell me that Gabe's line was coming into the game.

I made sure to watch the other Lopez make his way onto the ice and immediately go after the puck. I chuckled a little to myself as Gabe's go-for-it attitude made an appearance first thing, but Santana and I cheered him on. He was unable to get the puck away from the opposing player, but his distraction caused his teammate to get in between their opponents and intercept the puck. The Blue Jacket made his way down the ice, skating past defenders and taking a shot on goal.

Everyone groaned as the puck missed the net.

Play continued as the other team regained control of the puck and made their way down the ice toward the home team's goal. The more I watched, the more I saw how good Gabe was. He was almost always where the puck was and he was definitely a team player, always taking care to pass it when needed.

"He is really good," I told Santana.

"He is," Santana said proudly. I turned to see the smile on her face as she watched her little brother play.

Gabe came back out of the game to rest, but he looked over to where our seats were and gave us a grin. I grinned back and waved at him.

"So how did Gabe get into hockey?" I asked as there was a lull in the game for a commercial break.

Santana turned to me to respond, her eyes sparkling as she thought back on their childhood. "We grew up in Connecticut where the winters can be pretty harsh. Pretty much everyone where we lived went ice skating in the winter and the boys, and some of the girls, were all into hockey. Gabe was no exception."

I smiled at her, thinking of a young Santana and Gabe all bundled up in their winter gear skating around on a frozen pond. "Did you ever play?" I asked, intrigued.

She laughed a little and shook her head. "No, I was more apt to try toe loops than slapshots. I watched Gabe play but I just skated more because it was the thing to do with friends."

"How did you guys end up in Columbus?" I wanted to learn as much as I could about Santana, so I kept the conversation going even after the game resumed.

"Well, Gabe was drafted by the Blue Jackets pretty much right out of high school. He was on the development squad for a couple of years, and by that time I was graduating from Rutgers with my bachelor's degree. I applied for law school at Ohio State and got in, so I came here to go to school and be close to my brother."

I gave her a shy smile. "I'm glad you guys are here," I said truthfully.

She looked at me searchingly for a moment before she smiled back. "Me, too."

Gabe got back into the game and we watched him again. He passed the puck to his teammate, who had a clear shot on goal. The crowd erupted when the puck hit the back of the net.

There were a few more opportunities to chat during the first period. Once intermission came, I really needed to pee. So I told Santana I needed to go to the restroom, and she said she needed to go too so she would just go up with me. We talked a little about how the game was so far as we made our way up the stairs through the crowd.

I really loved being around Santana. I hadn't felt this way about anyone before. At least not quite like this. I felt so drawn to her. If I was honest with myself, I knew I wanted more than just friendship with her. But I figured she was probably straight and most likely seeing someone.

We finally were able to use the restroom and, as we were walking out, Santana asked if I wanted something from the concessions. I wasn't too hungry, so I said I could really use a drink. We got in line for the concession booth and I ordered myself a Coke. Santana quickly ordered herself a diet and pulled out her wallet.

"I can pay," I objected, pulling out my own wallet.

Santana shook her head at me, pulled out some money, and handed it to the cashier. "I got it, Britt," she said with a smile at me.

I couldn't stop my smile at the nickname, but still protested her paying for me. "Santana, I know you paid for those cupcakes the other day and Gabe bought me several drinks," I argued. "I can pay for my own stuff."

Santana just shrugged, took her change, and grabbed our drinks. "I know, but I just figured I could go ahead and get these right now."

I took my Coke from her hand as we moved away from the counter. "Well you have to let me buy the next ones," I demanded. Santana gave me a small smile and a look that I knew meant that she wasn't really considering that happening. "Promise me, San."

I don't know why I shortened her name. Gabe had been calling her Tana, but for some reason it didn't feel right for me to call her that in this situation. I kind of worried that she wouldn't like me calling her that, but I relaxed a little as I saw her smile grow and her eyes light up.

"Okay," she replied. "I promise."

"Good."

We made our way back down to our seats and settled in for the second period.

"So you never told me what you do for a living the other night," Santana said out of the blue.

I swallowed the Coke I had just taken a sip of and recalled that I had actually only talked to Gabe about my job Tuesday evening. "I am a biomedical engineer," I told her.

Santana's brows rose. "That is awesome," she enthused. "So I take it you're like super smart then?"

I laughed and the corners of her mouth turned up a little at my response. "I don't know about that," I replied honestly. "I'm not a genius or anything. I did well in school and always enjoyed science. It seemed like a really interesting field, and MIT had a good program. So I went for it." I finished my explanation with a small shrug.

"Wait, hold up," Santana said, actually holding her hand up as if to stop me from talking further. She had an incredulous look on her face, and I found it completely adorable. "You went to freaking MIT and you are saying you aren't a genius? I don't believe you."

I giggled as she shook her head at me. "I'm not a genius, I promise you," I said, amused. "I was lucky to get into MIT and I had to work really hard to do well."

Santana smiled at me. "I'm sure you did," she said. "But you still aren't going to convince me you're not a genius when you went to MIT and you do the job you do. You are pretty amazing, Brittany."

My heart skipped a beat and my face burned in another blush. A grin spread across my face as I looked down to my lap shyly. Hearing that kind of praise coming from Santana made me feel so incredible. But I wasn't used to having people say those kinds of things to me, so I wasn't really sure how to properly respond.

"Thanks," I practically whispered to my lap. I wanted to object and say that I wasn't anything special. But I wanted Santana to think I was special. And, honestly, she actually made me feel special. So I just thanked her and let it go at that.

The game had resumed during our talk and, even though I didn't want to, I dragged my attention to what was happening on the ice.

I couldn't really concentrate much on the game anymore though. I kept thinking about how Santana made me feel. Ever since I had seen the woman sitting in the seat next to mine, my heart hadn't beat properly and I felt a constant tingle of excitement and what I could only describe as hope. Hope for what, I didn't know. I really wanted the fact that Santana showed up to hang out with me meant that she wanted to get to know me as much as I wanted to get to know her.

I figured she was around my age, since Gabe seemed like he was maybe a little bit younger than I was. She definitely didn't appear to be much older than me, if she even was. The more I thought about her, the more I wanted to know everything about her. When her birthday was. What her favorite color was. What her favorite food was. What she liked to do for fun. Just whatever I could find out.

"So how old are you?" I asked the next time the Zamboni was making its way over the ice during the commercial break.

"I'll be 26 in June," she answered. I was right that she was about my age.

"Wow, so you aren't very far out of law school, huh?" I asked, impressed that she was working at such a big company right out of school.

She gave a little smile and shrugged. "Not too far, no. I graduated last year and was lucky enough to get a job at Baker Brothers right after graduation and passing the bar."

"That's really impressive," I told her truthfully. "You must be great at what you do."

She looked down at her lap bashfully, but I could see the hint of a smile on her face. "I don't know about that."

"Take it from someone who you called a genius," I teased playfully. "You are pretty amazing yourself."

Santana looked back up at me and smiled. Her eyes seemed to have something in them that she wanted to tell me as they searched mine, but I wasn't sure what it was. I could feel my own smile start to fade slowly as the look in her eyes caught me and my heart started to pound in my chest.

Suddenly, Santana broke the look to turn back to the game. She cleared her throat and took a sip of her drink. I frowned a little, confused as to what was going on.

"How old are you?" Santana asked a minute later, turning back to me.

Apparently she was going to act like that strange moment before didn't happen. I could do that, although I wanted to know what it was about. I didn't want to make Santana uncomfortable though.

"I just turned 27," I said.

She nodded a little and smiled before she realized Gabe was going back into the game. We went back to cheering on her brother, who assisted in another goal.

We continued with some small talk throughout the rest of the game. The Blue Jackets ended up winning 3-1. Even though Gabe didn't score, he did have two assists so it was a good game for him. I was kind of wondering if maybe I would get to see him after the game finished, but apart from giving another smile and wave towards us as he headed back to the locker room, I didn't have any opportunity to interact with him.

Santana and I started to make our way out of the arena.

"How long do their post-game duties usually take?" I asked curiously.

Santana shrugged. "I don't really know," she replied. "If I come to a game I usually just leave and Gabe does whatever he needs to and then either goes home or goes out to party and pick up some chick."

"Oh," I said, kind of disappointed.

"Were you wanting to see him?" Santana asked.

"I kind of hoped I would get the opportunity to thank him for getting me a ticket," I told her.

"Well I'm sure you can just text him or something," she said a little harshly.

My heart hurt hearing her snap at me. I didn't know why she reacted like that to me wanting to see Gabe, but I didn't want her thinking that I wanted to see him more than I wanted to see her or anything.

"I also wanted to thank him for getting a ticket for you so I could get to know you more," I told her shyly.

Santana bit her lip as her mouth started to spread into a smile. "If you want, I'm sure you can call him tomorrow or something," she said, softer this time. "I am sure he will probably even get you some sort of autographed shirt or something if you want."

"Really?" I asked, pleasantly surprised. "That would be really cool."

Santana laughed at me as we made our way out into the cool night air. "Then I will make sure he does it," she promised.

I shoved my hands into my jacket pockets as the chill hit me and I noticed Santana doing the same. She wasn't in any hurry, so I slowed my pace to match hers. I wasn't quite ready to say goodbye to her yet, even though we had spent nearly the last four hours together.

"So do you maybe want to go get a drink somewhere?" Santana asked suddenly, surprising me to an unplanned stop. I still kind of couldn't believe that someone like Santana would want to keep hanging out with me. It hadn't happened before. She must have misunderstood my surprise, however, because she kind of got a look of horror on her face. "I mean, obviously not alcohol for you. I just meant like go somewhere and we could relax and we could get whatever we wanted to drink. Or we could even go get something to eat or something."

I grinned at her nervous rambling. "It's okay, San," I told her before my smile faded. "But I can't."

Her face fell and it broke my heart. "Oh," she said, looking at the ground. "Okay, that's fine. I get it."

I could tell she was a little upset by my refusal of her invitation, but it definitely wasn't because I didn't want to spend time with her. I was certainly intrigued as to why she would be upset for me turning her down, but I was too afraid to ask her why.

"I mean, I would like to," I tried to reassure her. "But my dogs are probably doing the potty dance pretty bad so I really should get home so I don't risk coming home to a disaster."

I saw Santana's mouth twitch but she was able to keep her face serious. "Wow, that would be pretty bad," she said gravely. "I didn't know dogs could do the potty dance, though."

I could hear the amusement in her voice at the second statement. I fought off my own smile, making sure to make my expression stern. "Oh, yes," I told her. "The dog potty dance is a known crisis. Once it starts, it signifies something bad will happen unless it is remedied immediately."

"Pretty serious stuff," Santana said, but she could no longer contain her smile.

I giggled and nodded, smiling goofily back at her. "It is," I said. "So as you can see, I really should get home to them so they don't explode or something."

She laughed and shook her head a little at our playfulness. "Okay, let's get you home then. Where did you park?"

I turned to look where exactly we were and recognized the direction my car was located. "Over that way by some apartments," I said as I pointed toward where I was parked.

She looked at where I was pointing and grinned a little. "Perfect," she said and started walking that way.

I just assumed that she was parked over there as well, so I hurriedly followed her.

"So what kind of dogs do you have?" Santana asked as we walked.

"I have a Golden Retriever and a Great Dane," I replied, smiling as I thought of my babies.

"Wow," Santana said, a little surprised. "You like big dogs, huh?"

I gave a small laugh. "Yeah, I am not really a fan of the little lap dogs," I explained. "I like a big dog that I can wrap my arms around and give a big bear hug to. They are the best when you're feeling a little down."

She gave me a smile. "I imagine your dogs are perfect for that then," she said quietly.

"They definitely are," I confirmed. "So do you like dogs?"

Santana nodded. "I do, but I never got the opportunity to have one," she said.

I pouted at her. "Well that just sucks," I said. "I don't know how I could go my whole life not being able to have a dog."

She giggled at me. "It's okay, Britt," she reassured me. "I hope to be able to get one someday, but for the time being I just like to play with other peoples' dogs."

I smiled at that, thinking how nice it would be if Santana got to play with my dogs. Because playing with my dogs meant that Santana would be hanging out with me, which I would definitely love to happen. I seriously was debating whether or not I should ask her if she wanted to come over sometime to meet them when we reached the lot where my car was parked.

"I'm parked just over there," I told her, pointing out my blue Ford Escape. "Are you parked here, too?"

She shook her head. "No, I just figured I would walk you to your car."

"Santana!" I exclaimed, shocked as to why she would walk out of her way to get me to my car. "Why didn't you say something?" She just shrugged a little and smiled. "At least let me drive you to your car then so you don't have to walk by yourself."

She shook her head. "I didn't drive," she replied mysteriously.

"You walked to the game?" I asked incredulously. "Please tell me you live nearby, and I will drive you home."

"I do live nearby," she said with a smirk. "I live right over there."

Santana pointed to the apartment complex next to the lot I was parked in.

"Seriously?" I asked, laughing a little at myself.

"Yep," she said, popping the 'p' at the end of the word. She grinned at me. I kind of felt stupid, even though I had no reason to. It wasn't like she told me she lived nearby or anything.

"Fancy," I told her teasingly. The apartments looked really nice. Like, _really_ nice. I wondered if her brother helped her pay for it since I didn't know how a woman who just graduated from law school last year could have afforded a place like that.

"Eh, it's okay," she said playfully.

I rolled my eyes and laughed. God, I really wanted to see her again. I looked to the ground and I started to get that fluttery feeling in my stomach as my nerves started to get to me. I couldn't believe I was really considering asking to get together with her again. I never did that kind of thing. But I wanted to see her again too badly that I was willing to risk my anxiety.

"So did you maybe want to have dinner at my house sometime next week?" I asked, looking up at her shyly. I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. "I mean, you could meet and play with my dogs and stuff."

My heart was pounding as I got out my invitation. What if she said no? What if she thought I was stupid for even asking? What if she was just being nice about the dog thing and she didn't really like them? I was so horrible with social situations. I wanted to look away and hide my face, afraid that Santana was going to look at me like I was a freak.

I forced myself to keep looking at her. And I watched as she glanced down to the ground bashfully and bit her lip on a smile before looking back up to meet my eyes. My heart started to pound for a different reason now.

"I would really like that," she said, smiling at me so sweetly that I thought I would melt. I grinned back at her both in relief and in response to her gorgeous smile.

 _Get it together, Brittany_ , I scolded myself. _She is just being nice_.

"Awesome," I said, still grinning like an idiot. "So just maybe like give me your number and I can set something up with you next week that works. Is that okay?"

I pulled out my phone as she nodded. I put her number into my phone and saved her contact information. I typed out a text really quickly and hit send.

 _Now you have my number too- Britt_

She pulled out her phone at the chime and grinned when she saw that I had sent her a text.

"Just let me know when you want me to come over," she said, still smiling. "I always have a possibility to work late during the week if something comes up, but I am sure we can work something out."

"Sounds good," I told her, still smiling.

"I will let you get home to your dogs," she told me as she stepped closer to me. She wrapped her arms around me in a hug, and my arms immediately went up to return it. I had thought about this feeling since Tuesday when she had hugged me. I could smell her scent again and I closed my eyes at the feelings coursing through me.

"Goodnight Brittany," she mumbled as she hugged me.

"Goodnight," I said and we pulled apart.

I watched as she walked away. She turned to look over her shoulder and gave a little wave and a smile as she walked toward what I presumed was her apartment. I waved back and stood there for another couple of seconds before I recovered enough to get in my car.

I thought of Santana the whole way home. I couldn't believe that I was going to have her in my house next week. I couldn't wait to see her again.

Thankfully the dogs had been angels and there was no disaster due to them going bedtime potty later than they were used to. I had a feeling their normal routine would start to get a little disrupted in the near future. I hoped they would learn to adjust, because I was looking forward to maybe having some good changes in my life. And I hoped that these changes involved one Santana Lopez.

 **A/N: I think Brittany and Santana are pretty cute together, but what do you guys think? Brittany getting out of her comfort zone is a pretty big step for her. And inviting Santana over to her place... is this a date? What do you think Santana is thinking?**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The next morning saw me doing my usual routine. I got up, took my pill, took care of the animals, showered, brushed my teeth, did my hair, got dressed, did my make-up, and headed into work. The only difference was that I did everything with a big smile on my face and a lightness in my step.

I was feeling better than I could remember feeling. Even my project partner, Gus, noticed my improved mood. The man normally didn't talk much, but he stopped by my workspace in the morning and stood next to me.

"It's good to see you happy," he said quietly.

I looked at him in surprise, but I still couldn't stop my smile. I was definitely happy. I just didn't realize that my unhappiness had been so evident to everyone else.

"Thanks," I told him. "It's good to be happy."

He smiled at me, his face showing the hint of wrinkles as it scrunched up. He was probably about twenty years older than me, but his personality was perfect for our partnership.

"Did you meet someone?" Gus asked curiously.

I didn't really know how to answer that. I was really attracted to Santana, but there was nothing more between us than a budding friendship. And Gabe was really awesome and hopefully he would turn out to be a good friend as well. Meeting them had definitely been the catalyst for my mood improvement. But it was more Santana that was causing my happiness.

"I made a couple of new friends," I answered instead.

He nodded to me. "I was friends with my wife before we got together."

I was kind of taken off guard at that. I had been working with this man for a little over a year and I didn't even know he was married. I felt bad that I really never took the time to talk to him apart from work related stuff.

I smiled at him though, recognizing that he could tell that my happiness came from more than just making new friends. "That's good to hear," I said.

He nodded to me again and gave a final smile before he walked over to his own workspace. I got back to work then, making myself a promise that I would make more effort to get to know Gus a little better. Maybe I had the opportunity for a friend at work all along.

I spent the morning debating on whether or not I should text Santana. I wasn't sure if she was able to keep her phone on her at work or if she would even be able to have a conversation while she was at work. I figured a text was safer than a phone call, but I still didn't want to interrupt her in anything important.

It was near lunchtime when my own phone went off with a text notification. My heart skipped a beat at the thought it may be Santana. I was a little disappointed to find out that it was her brother instead.

 _Glad u got 2 come 2 game last nite. Sry I couldn't c u after- Gabe_

God, his shorthand texts were going to be annoying. Then again, I knew I was one of those people who spelled everything out that annoyed a lot of people too.

 _Glad I got to go! Thanks again for the tickets! You're a really great player- Brittany_

 _Thx ;) Tana said u wanted signed shirt?- Gabe_

Oh no. I hoped he didn't think I was trying to use him to get stuff or anything. I definitely didn't want anything like that to happen. I was regretting the fact that I told Santana that an autograph would be cool. I really didn't think she would go blabbing to her brother about it first thing though.

 _Oh you really don't have to do that. She just mentioned it and I thought it would be really cool. But you don't have to if you don't want to- Brittany_

Was I making a fool of myself? I hated interactions like this. I had no clue what he was really thinking over a text. He could be laughing at me on the other end and I would have no clue. I had some serious insecurity problems.

 _It's no prob! Would luv 2 sign sumthing 4 u. Ur a friend!- Gabe_

That was a relief. At least I wouldn't feel like I was trying to mooch off of him if he was doing something as a friend. I smiled at that thought.

 _I am gone on away games next wk. Tana said u were getting 2gether 4 dinner sumtime next wk. I can just give it 2 her 2 give 2 u?- Gabe_

I pouted a little at the fact that I still wasn't going to be able to see Gabe. It was his forwardness in coming up to me at the bar the other day that was responsible for the current changes my life was starting to take. I really wanted to hang out with him again.

But then I thought about the rest of his text and smiled. I would definitely be seeing Santana sometime next week. I was looking forward to it with a nervous excitement.

 _That works! It would be cool to hang out with you again sometime too- Brittany_

I hoped that he was actually serious about wanting to be my friend.

 _Hopefully when I get a down day we can do dinner? Me, u, n Tana?- Gabe_

I smiled at that. Dinner with Santana and Gabe would be awesome.

 _Sounds great! Good luck with your games!- Brittany_

 _Thx- Gabe_

I was feeling pretty good after talking with Gabe. I had a confidence with my budding friendships that I hadn't felt in awhile. Gabe really seemed interested in continuing to become a friend to me. And Santana was definitely heading into the good friend territory already. My confidence allowed me to take the chance and text Santana.

 _Wanted to say thanks again for hanging out with me at the game last night. I had a really good time!- Brittany_

I wasn't expecting an answer back, but I was glad to take the step to initiate contact with her again.

It wasn't until the afternoon that I received a response.

 _It was my pleasure. I had a really good time too :)- Santana_

My grin threatened to split my face in two. This girl just may be the death of me with all of the irregular beating my heart was doing due to her.

And so began our daily texting chats.

We texted quite a bit over the weekend. We seemed to have an unspoken agreement that our conversations were going to stay in text form and we wouldn't call each other. It started off just talking about what we were doing that day. Then it progressed into telling each other more things about ourselves.

I learned that Santana enjoyed watching "Say Yes to the Dress" while I revealed that I couldn't resist watching "Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives". We spent a couple of hours watching each other's show and talking about the episodes. I had to say that "Say Yes to the Dress" wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be, but I really couldn't stand a lot of those brides. Santana liked my show better than I liked hers.

Santana told me a little about her work. I couldn't really understand a lot of what she did. Mostly I could tell that she did a lot of contract work and made sure the company continued to operate under the many laws regulating businesses. Seeing all the kinds of things she was responsible for made me respect her all the more for the stuff she had to know. That was definitely not something I would be able to do.

She seemed to feel the same way about my job. I tried to explain the types of things I did as best as I could without using too many scientific terms. Not that I thought that Santana couldn't understand it, but because I didn't want to bore her. I knew that science tended to bore a lot of people, but I loved it. She always seemed interested in what I had to say about my work though, so I felt pretty comfortable talking about science-y things with her.

The nice thing about texting was that we could keep a conversation going for hours without any real interruption. If we had to put the phone down for a little while to go do something else, we always could and then come back and pick right up where we left off like we hadn't stopped. It also gave that little extra buffer to help us open up to one another.

Talking on the phone or in person was a little intimate, at least for me it was. So that extra protection that texting provided helped me reveal more about myself than I may have by talking. That relieved me, because then I felt like we would be able to be more familiar with each other when we next saw each other.

On Sunday I suggested that Santana come over for dinner Friday night. That way, if she had to stay at work late we could still get together without worrying about needing to get up early the next morning for work. Even if she was able to make it on time it would give us that much extra time to be able to hang out. Santana agreed, so we set a time for her to be over at 7pm.

As the week went on, the more nervous I became. I was going to have Santana over to my house for a dinner I was going to prepare. I was going to have a beautiful woman, who I absolutely had a crush on, alone in my home for hours. How in the hell was I going to handle that without making a fool out of myself? And how would I be able to get through it without Santana finding out I liked her as more than a friend and scaring her off?

My desire to see her outweighed my nervousness, however. And the continued texting of the brunette helped. She helped to keep me calm, especially when she would tell me things like she couldn't wait to try my cooking or that she was looking forward to meeting my dogs. My favorite was when she told me that she really missed getting to hang out with me all week.

I actually made more of an effort to talk to Gus at work, too. It turned out that the man was really a great guy to just ramble to when I needed to get things off of my chest. I hadn't told him how I was feeling about Santana, but I thought he could maybe tell. At least he didn't seem to be disgusted by the idea of me crushing on another woman.

He mostly just listened as I talked about how nervous I was to be having someone over, because I hadn't had anyone over to my house since I had moved here that wasn't family. I told him that I hadn't really had any friends in awhile, so it was scary to put myself out there like this and risk being rejected. He occasionally butted in with a comment about how Santana seemed to really be interested in being my friend and to relax and be myself. I was really glad that I had decided to confide in him. He really helped me loosen up about the whole situation.

I debated on what I should make for dinner. I didn't want something that was going to be too labor intensive because I didn't want the stress of having too much to do weigh me down. But I wanted to make something that showed I put a little bit of effort into the meal. I didn't want Santana thinking that I didn't care enough to put any work into it.

I figured that I could always make spaghetti with my homemade marinara and meatballs. I could save on time with the pasta by using the packaged stuff, and the meatballs and sauce could be left to cook on their own for a few while I did something else. I figured that, since there were two of us, I would forego a large loaf of garlic bread and make some garlic breadsticks. I could always get the prepackaged breadstick dough and just put some garlic butter on them.

I checked with Santana to see if she liked Italian food, and she replied that she loved it. So it appeared I had a meal. That stress was taken off of my mind. I made sure to stop by the store Thursday night to get everything I would need to make dinner. I also bought a bottle of wine just in case Santana maybe wanted to drink some with the meal. I didn't want her to feel like she couldn't enjoy alcohol just because I couldn't.

I texted her after I got home from the store to let her know that, if she wanted it, I got a bottle of wine to drink with dinner. I just wanted to reassure her that she was okay to drink if she wanted to or be uncomfortable around me for drinking.

 _Okay, sounds good Britt :). Should I bring anything?- Santana_

 _No, that's okay. I think I have everything covered.- Brittany_

 _Even dessert?- Santana_

Oh shit! I didn't even think about dessert. I was already messing everything up!

 _I forgot about dessert! I can pick something up to make tomorrow.- Brittany_

 _Don't worry about it. I've got it covered ;)- Santana_

This dinner was supposed to be me making a meal for her. It wasn't supposed to be her having to provide anything that I totally messed up on. I was disappointed in myself. It had been so long since I had to really cook for anyone though, so I let my nerves take over and it made me forget something.

 _I don't want you to have to worry about bringing anything. I was supposed to provide you with a meal and not have you do anything :(- Brittany_

 _It's fine! I am bringing dessert and you can't do anything about it!- Santana_

I couldn't help but smile at that. Santana seemed to like to do things for me. From her getting cupcakes for my birthday, going to the hockey game to keep me company, and buying me a drink at the game, it seemed like she was an expert at making me smile.

 _Okay, okay! You win! :P- Brittany_

 _Good! :)- Santana_

I debated telling her that I was excited to see her tomorrow, but I was afraid that may be me revealing my feelings too much. I didn't want to make her uncomfortable at all. I didn't need to worry however, because Santana quickly sent me another text.

 _I can't wait to see you tomorrow- Santana_

I grinned as my heart started to pound a little in my chest. I knew Santana probably just meant that she was looking forward to hanging out and trying out my cooking or something. I didn't figure she meant she was looking forward to seeing me the same way I was looking forward to seeing her. But I couldn't stop myself from revealing that I returned the sentiment.

 _I can't either- Brittany_

 _:)- Santana_

I went to bed that night hoping to get a good night's sleep. Instead I spent hours thinking over all of the things I needed to make sure I got done the next day before Santana arrived. Thankfully I had cleaned the house really well throughout the week, so I only needed to worry about doing a final walk-through to make sure I didn't have anything strange lying around. I planned my timing for cooking and hoped that I didn't screw anything up.

I also really hoped that I didn't make a fool of myself in front of Santana. We had been out in public the previous two times and there were always things around to help come up with conversation topics. But now it would just be the two of us in private. What if I couldn't think of things to talk about? What if I couldn't keep the conversation going?

I told myself to calm down. Santana and I had been keeping text conversations going for the past week. I only needed to transition the comfort I had with the texting to the face-to-face conversations. Finally, I started to relax enough to fall asleep.

Morning came too soon for me. I hurried through my routine and got to work. I was in the worst mood I had been in all week. Gus seemed to sense that I was nervous and tried to get me to talk to him. I was quiet most of the morning, but after I got another text from Santana saying she was going to be so glad to eat a nice home cooked meal tonight I started to relax. I talked to Gus a little and he just listened, nodding or smiling at me occasionally. He understood that I just needed to talk my nerves out a bit.

As I was getting ready to leave for the day, he stopped me and patted my shoulder comfortingly.

"Just relax tonight," he said. "She wouldn't be coming over if she didn't like you. Be yourself and everything will go fine."

"Thanks," I told him with a grateful smile.

He gave me an encouraging smile back. "Good luck and have fun."

I nodded to him and made my way home. Thankfully traffic wasn't too bad and I made it home in less than half an hour. I greeted the dogs and took my pill. It was times like these when I was really grateful to have a fenced in backyard, because I was able to let the dogs out back and leave them there while I took a quick shower.

After I showered and dried my hair, I dressed in some yoga pants and an old t-shirt, let the dogs back inside, and then headed into the kitchen. I set the oven to preheat for the meatballs and started with the sauce, getting the diced tomatoes and seasonings into the saucepan to start cooking. Once that started to simmer, I made my meatballs. I finished forming my last meatball and then put them into the oven. I set the timer, checked my sauce, and filled a pot with water and put it on the stove to boil.

I left things cooking for a few minutes to go work on getting myself ready. I had debated earlier in the day on what to wear. This obviously wasn't a date and was more of two friends just hanging out, but I still wanted to look nice. Especially since Santana was going to be who I was hanging out with, and she always looked amazing. At least she had the two times I had seen her. So I decided on a pair of skinny jeans with a flowery scoop neck top, and I put on the pair of boots I wore the other day to the game. I quickly got dressed and put on some light make-up.

I went back out to the kitchen to check on everything. The meatballs were almost due to come out of the oven and the sauce was still simmering nicely. I stirred it and tasted it, then added a little more red pepper flakes to give it some more flavor. The water was almost boiling, but I didn't need to worry about putting the pasta in quite yet since it wasn't even quite 6:30 yet. The timer for the meatballs went off and I shut it off and pulled them out and put them on a pad on the counter. I reset the heat on the oven to the proper temperature for the breadsticks, then melted some butter and flavored it with garlic. I opened the package of breadsticks and arranged them onto the baking sheet, then brushed them with my garlic butter.

The oven beeped, letting me know that it was now at the correct temperature. I slid the sheet of breadsticks into the oven and set my timer again. The water was now boiling steadily, so I portioned out my pasta and put it into the pot. I stirred my sauce once again and went back to my bathroom to finish getting ready. I decided I didn't have enough time to do anything fancy with my hair, so I pulled it up into a neat ponytail and called my look complete.

I went back into the kitchen and fed the dogs their dinner and put some more food in the cat's bowl. I spooned the meatballs into a serving dish, stirred the sauce again, and pulled the breadsticks out when the timer went off. The pasta was now done, so I strained that. It was now ten minutes to 7pm. I turned off the heat to the sauce, put the cooked pasta into a serving bowl and tossed it with some of the sauce. I put the rest of the sauce into the dish with the meatballs, and then I put the breadsticks onto a plate and covered them with a napkin to try to keep them warm. I put all of the food on my kitchen table and put out two place settings.

The dirty dishes were going to have to wait because, after I finished placing the silverware, my doorbell rang. It was exactly 7 o'clock. Santana was punctual.

Naturally, my dogs started barking like mad at the sound of the doorbell. I told them to be quiet and went to the front door. The dogs followed closely behind. I paused at the door and took a deep breath to try to calm my nerves caused by the thought of seeing Santana again. It was now or never.

I told the dogs to sit and stay and pulled open the door to find the beautiful Latina on my front step. She had her hair down in loose waves around her shoulders and she gave me a big smile that I immediately returned. My heart was beating harder in my chest at being close to Santana again.

"Hi," I told her and moved out of the way to let her come in.

"Hi," she said back and walked through the doorway. She was carrying a box that looked like it had come from Kyle's shop and a small paper bag on top of that.

"Here, let me take those," I told her, reaching for the items in her hands.

"Thanks," she said, handing the box and bag over to me. I kicked the door closed behind her. "There are some treats for the dogs and the cat in the bag."

"You didn't have to do that," I said, surprised. She really was good at this whole thing. She just shrugged and smiled at me. "But they will love you forever for bringing them something."

I giggled a little and she chuckled. She took off her jacket and hung it on the hooks in the entry way. I saw that she was wearing a tight red cowl neck top and skinny jeans with a pair of low black heels. She looked amazing.

"Your dogs are very well behaved," Santana said, her eyes on my dogs who had (much to my pleasure) stayed put when I told them to.

"They usually aren't that good, but they must have heard you say T-R-E-A-T and are waiting patiently for it," I said, amused.

"Ah, I see," she said, her eyebrows lifting a little as she smiled. "They're beautiful dogs."

I grinned. "They think so. The handsome shaggy blonde one is Sir Lancelot, and the big black and white lady next to him is Lady Guinevere."

Santana giggled. "Someone have a liking for tales of King Arthur?"

I shrugged a little. "Not really, I just like fancy names," I told her. "If you see a big fat tabby running around that would be Lord Tubbington."

"Now that is a great name," she laughed.

"Thanks," I giggled back. Then I realized that we had still been standing in my entryway for several minutes and about kicked myself. "Sorry, you can come in. Dinner is ready and on the table. We can just go straight in and we can give the babies their surprises before we eat."

"Okay," she said with a soft smile.

I led her into the kitchen, which was pretty must just to the left of the entryway. The dogs followed us, and I put the box down on the counter before turning back to her. She was looking around my kitchen.

"I like your kitchen," she told me. "It looks like it gets used a lot."

"I try to use it as much as possible," I said. I liked my kitchen. It was large and comfortable with tan granite countertops and maple cabinets. I had new appliances and a top notch gas range. "I like to cook."

"Well I like to eat, so this works out well," Santana said with a laugh.

I chuckled and grabbed the paper bag with the animal's treats. "Did you want to give them to the dogs?" I asked, holding the bag out toward her.

"If you wouldn't mind," she said a little shyly.

I grinned at her. "Not at all. Besides, they will absolutely love getting a treat from someone new."

She took the bag from me and pulled out a large gourmet style bone shaped treat. I could see both of the dogs' eyes grow larger at the morsel and their butts promptly hit the ground as they waited for it, tails wagging rapidly across the ground.

Santana giggled at their actions. "They know what to do, don't they?"

"Oh yeah," I laughed.

I watched as she reached the treat out toward Lance. That was a good choice, because he was the more impatient of the two. He took it gently but impatiently and quickly gobbled it up. Santana petted him on the head as he ate his treat in about five seconds. She reached into the bag again and pulled out an identical treat to the one Lance had just devoured and offered it to Lady. She took it daintily and chewed it slowly, allowing Santana to rub her head and ears a few times.

Santana stood back up when Lady had finished and both dogs looked at her adoringly, hoping that she had more to offer them. "Sorry guys, but that's all I brought," she told them apologetically.

They seemed to understand her though, because they both ambled out of the kitchen and into the living room where I knew they were going to lie down by the couch.

"I doubt we will see Lord Tubbington for awhile, so we can try to give him his treat later," I told her.

She nodded and I took the bag from her and put it back on the counter. I motioned toward the table for her to have a seat. She moved toward the table and pulled out a chair, lowering herself into it.

"Wow, Brittany," she said in awe. "Everything looks so delicious."

"I hope it tastes that way," I said bashfully. "Did you want some wine?"

"Sure. Thanks," she replied.

"I hope red is okay," I said a little nervously. "I don't know that much about wine."

"It's perfect," she told me with a smile.

I poured her a glass and walked over to the table. I handed it to her and she took a small sip. She smiled up at me as I sat down.

"This is a nice wine," she complimented.

I let out a relieved breath. I really wasn't very knowledgeable about different kinds of wine, so I just kind of picked one out at the store that looked like it might be decent.

"So, shall we eat?" I asked. My nerves were a little on edge, and I just really hoped that I didn't screw anything up.

I pulled the napkin off of the plate of breadsticks and watched as her eyes went wide. Oh no, I messed something up, didn't I? I knew this dinner was going to be a bust. I could only hope that she wasn't going to hold this against me forever.

 **A/N: So we get some private one-on-one Brittana time! Do you think Santana thinks this is a date or just a dinner between friends? What do you think of their relationship so far? Did Brittany actually screw something up? What do you guys think?**

 **By the way, I appreciate all of the reviews and comments (not to mention the follows/favorites). I try to reply to everyone, but if you are a guest I can't message you. Just know that I read them all and am thankful to you guys for letting me know what you think (even if you don't like it)!**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

My stomach was fluttering as my nervousness skyrocketed. Santana was still staring at the plate of breadsticks, but I could see the hint of a smile starting to appear.

"Did you ask Gabe for advice about dinner?" Santana asked, a little suspicious.

"No," I replied, still nervous. "Should I have?"

She shook her head in wonder, the smile starting to spread across her lips. "How did you know I love breadsticks?"

I laughed in relief, my nerves flying away and my shoulders relaxing. "I didn't," I told her honestly. "But I will definitely keep that in mind. I'm glad I decided to make these instead of garlic bread."

"Oh, me too," she told me enthusiastically. Her grin was now evident and she eagerly reached out and grabbed two breadsticks. She put one on her plate and brought the other to her mouth for a rather large bite. She moaned, causing a flicker of arousal to shoot straight between my legs. "These are so good," she said after she swallowed, immediately taking another bite.

"I'm glad you like them," I told her with a smile, forcing myself to ignore the little throbs at my core.

I proceeded to dish up some pasta for myself, topping it off with a couple of meatballs and some extra sauce. I took a breadstick for myself. Once Santana had finished her first breadstick, she filled her own plate with pasta and topped it with more sauce and some meatballs.

"Britt, you are an amazing cook," she said after she had sampled some pasta. "Can I hire you to be my personal chef?"

"We may be able to work out a deal," I teased her.

We continued to eat, sharing some small talk over our meal. Santana gave me more compliments for my cooking. Compliments usually made me uncomfortable because I wasn't used to them. I didn't really know how to respond, but, with Santana, I felt more relaxed and took the compliments with a smile and genuine thanks.

I really enjoyed being around Santana. She made me feel comfortable, but at the same time I kind of felt on edge with her. Like I was about to fall off of a precipice into a gaping black void. But as long as she was with me, I knew I would be okay at the bottom. I had never felt this weird mixture of emotions before. It was scary and exhilarating and all I wanted was to get to know her more.

We finished our dinner and I started to clear the table. Santana got up to help me and wouldn't listen when I told her to sit back down. So we both put away the leftovers and I put the dishes in the dishwasher and the pots and pans I put in the sink to soak. I would wash them later.

"So… dessert?" I asked with a hopeful smile on my face. I had a big sweet tooth and always had room for dessert. Especially if it was good, and if it came from Kyle's shop then it should be if those cupcakes were the normal kind of fare from there.

Santana giggled at me. "I don't know how you could possibly still be hungry after that delicious dinner."

I shrugged. "I like dessert."

"Well I guess I could eat some if you wanted to," she conceded with a smile.

"Yay!" I clapped my hands enthusiastically and grinned at her.

Santana laughed at me while I got the bakery box. I brought it to the table and opened it up to see two large, frosted brownies. My eyes widened at the size of the brownies.

"Uh, maybe we could share?" I offered as I realized I most definitely could not eat one of those on my own right now.

"I knew you couldn't possibly be that hungry," Santana said, amused. "But yeah, we can definitely share."

I got back up and got two small plates, two forks, and a knife to cut the brownie. I divided the brownie into two equal parts and plated them. I handed one to Santana along with a fork and sat back down to dig into my own dessert.

As I suspected, the brownie was just as delicious as the cupcakes.

"This is so freaking good," I moaned.

"I know, right? Kyle works wonders," Santana agreed, eagerly taking a bite of her own dessert.

I didn't like hearing Santana praise the man, even though I did agree with her sentiment. I don't know why I had such an irrational jealousy for the guy. Santana was just my friend. I turned my attention back to my brownie and finished it with gusto. Each bite was just as good as the last. If I didn't think I would look ridiculous, I would have licked the crumbs off of the plate.

I waited for Santana to take the last couple of bites of her brownie, then I picked up both of our plates and put them into the dishwasher. Santana refilled her wine glass and I told her she could head into the living room to relax for a few while I washed the dishes really quick. She offered to help me, but I wouldn't let her and so she went into the living room where I heard her greet and talk to the dogs.

I smiled as I washed the pots and pans. This dinner had turned out really well. Maybe we could make this a regular kind of thing. If Santana was interested of course.

I finished washing the last pan and put it into the rack to dry. I dried my hands and got myself a glass of water and made my way into the living room. I found Santana sitting on the couch, her laid back attitude from before gone. Instead, she was a little stiff and withdrawn.

"Is everything okay?" I asked, frowning a little.

She looked up at me, startled. She smiled but it didn't quite reach her eyes. "Yeah, everything's great," she said.

"Okay." I wasn't sure that I believed her, but I didn't know what could have upset her. I sat down on the other side of the couch and set my water down on a coaster on the coffee table.

"So I didn't know you're married," Santana said, surprising me. I looked at her sharply and she nodded her head toward the mantle of the fireplace where my wedding picture was displayed.

"I'm not," I answered quickly. "I mean, I was. I mean-"

I broke off, really not wanting to get into this discussion. I knew I needed to explain though, particularly after my inability to really get words out just a second ago. I took a deep breath and looked down at my hands.

"He died two years ago," I said, barely above a whisper.

"Oh my God, Brittany," Santana said quietly. "I'm so sorry."

I shook my head a little and shrugged, not really knowing what to say whenever people said that. I mean, I could say 'it's okay', but it really wasn't. I could say 'I've gotten over it', but I hadn't. I was left clueless on what to do. But I knew that I didn't want Santana to be sorry for me. Everybody else already was sorry enough for me. I wanted Santana to smile and laugh and make me smile and laugh, because I hadn't done that in two years.

"Don't be sorry," I told her, meeting her eyes. I could see the sadness in her beautiful chocolate orbs. I didn't know how to make it go away, though I desperately wanted to.

"You must really miss him," she said, reaching out and grabbing my hand. She gave it a comforting squeeze.

"I do," I said honestly. "Sam was my best friend."

She smiled a little at me. "How did you guys meet?"

I was a little surprised she was talking to me about him. Most people avoided the subject once they found out he had died. I was silent for a moment as I processed the fact that she was actually interested in knowing more about my story with Sam. Santana must have thought I was uncomfortable though, because she hurried to speak again.

"I'm sorry, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," she said quickly.

"No, it's okay," I reassured her. "Really. I'm just not used to people wanting to talk about him anymore."

"You can talk to me about whatever you want, Britt," she told me sincerely. "I'm here to listen."

I smiled gratefully at her. "Sam and I met in high school," I began. "I wasn't exactly popular since I was more interested in my classes than how the football team was doing. Not to mention that I had a hard time talking to people in general, so most people just ignored me."

I paused after I revealed my general awkwardness growing up. I figured it was kind of obvious that I wasn't good with social situations, but it still wasn't easy talking about it. Santana just smiled at me, indicating me to continue.

"Sam was my lab partner for chemistry Junior year. He was an easygoing guy and he kept trying to talk to me and get me to open up. Eventually I became comfortable enough to hold conversations with him. He was really sweet and never made fun of me. He was kind of a comic book nerd, but he had a lot of friends. I honestly didn't know why he was so interested in me."

"You're an amazing girl, so I can definitely see why," Santana told me, squeezing my hand again. "He sounds like he was really nice."

I smiled at her. "He was. That's why I said yes when he asked me out. We had been partners for two months when he asked me on a date. I was so nervous because I had never dated anyone before. But he was patient and understanding with me. And we were together throughout the rest of high school. Sam was my first everything. He was my first boyfriend, my first kiss, my first time. He was actually my only for all of those things," I confessed.

Santana's eyes widened a little. "You mean you haven't been with anyone else? Ever?"

I shook my head as I blushed profusely. "Just Sam. And when I got into MIT, he wanted to follow me. He knew he didn't want to go to college, so he decided he would work while I went to school. He proposed right after we graduated, and I said yes."

To be honest, I was a little scared to go off to school without someone that I knew. I was comfortable with Sam. I loved him a lot, and I knew that if he would come with me it would help me adjust to moving to a completely different state. I was scared I would never find anyone else that I could be with like Sam, so I agreed to marry him. I never regretted that decision.

"You definitely look really young in that picture," Santana said with a smile.

"We got married after I finished my freshman year at MIT," I said. "He was working two jobs and we got an apartment together near campus. Thankfully I had gotten a scholarship, because we couldn't afford tuition on top of rent and everything else. But he worked hard to support us, and he never once complained. I finally graduated and got a job and everything seemed like it was going to be great. We moved into a house and got Lance. Then, after I had been working for about a year and a half, Sam was coming home from his job at the garage he worked at when a drunk driver ran a red light and sideswiped him. He died right away."

"God, Britt," Santana said as she squeezed my hand tightly. "Is that- is that why you don't drink?"

I hesitated, not wanting to completely lie to her. I settled for telling her some of the truth. "It's part of it. But, like I told Gabe at the bar, I never really liked the taste of alcohol anyway."

Santana nodded. "I can understand your reluctance," she said. "He sounds like he was a really great guy."

"He really was," I agreed. I was quiet for a moment, then tried to shake myself out of my low mood. This was not how this night was supposed to go. "Sorry for making this night totally depressing."

"No, you really didn't," she said reassuringly. "I liked hearing more about you."

"Well, I think we've talked enough about me," I said, giving her a cheeky smile. "What about you? Do you have anyone special in your life?"

Santana gave a little laugh as she pulled her hand out of mine, a little to my disappointment, and reached for her wine glass. "I'm not seeing anyone at the moment, no."

"What about Kyle?" I asked, keeping the jealousy out of my voice. "You guys seemed close."

Santana started to choke on the sip of wine she had just taken. "Kyle?" Santana asked incredulously as she coughed. "Definitely not."

She started laughing, and I looked at her, confused.

"Kyle's gay," she explained.

"Oh!" Now I just felt kind of stupid being jealous of a gay guy.

"And even if he wasn't," Santana continued, "I am."

My eyes widened in surprise. I honestly had not expected that. I had been so focused on Santana being straight and possibly with Kyle that I had never even considered the possibility that she was a lesbian. I must have been lost in my thoughts for too long, because Santana's shoulders stiffened a little.

"Is that okay?" Santana asked hesitantly.

"Yes!" I hurried to reassure her. "I have absolutely no problem with that."

I wondered if I should tell her that I was bisexual. At least I was pretty sure I was. I had obviously never done anything with another woman before since I was with Sam when I realized that I was attracted to women as well. I was definitely very, _very_ attracted to Santana, so I was confident that I was indeed bisexual. Sam had known, and he had been fine with it. But I hadn't told anybody else before.

"Good," Santana said with a smile. "So how did you learn how to cook so well?"

I had missed my opportunity. Oh well. It wasn't like Santana would be interested in me anyways, so it wouldn't really matter if I told her that I was also attracted to women.

"I took a couple of cooking classes after I got married," I confessed. "I had never really had to cook before, so I didn't know much of anything. I figured that if I had a husband to feed then I should probably learn how to make food."

I chuckled and Santana joined in.

"I am glad I get to benefit from it then," she said.

Just then Lance came up to me and nudged my hand. I knew it meant that he wanted to go outside. I looked at the time and saw that it was already 9pm, which was usually when I let the dogs out for the final time before getting prepared for bed myself. I usually went to bed pretty early since I didn't really have anything to stay up for.

"You need to go outside buddy?" I asked the dog. He ran to the sliding doors in the living room that led out to the back deck and circled around, letting me know that he indeed needed to go outside.

I got up and Lady hurried over to the door with me. I let the dogs outside and they did their business quickly before running back inside. Lance went back over to the couch and settled in front of where I had been sitting. Lady went over and laid her head on Santana's lap, causing her to giggle as she petted the big dog's head.

"Lady seems to have taken a liking to you," I told Santana with a soft smile as I climbed over Lance and reclaimed my seat on the couch. I kicked off my shoes and tucked my feet under me as I faced Santana, getting comfortable to keep talking with the other woman.

"I like her too, so it works out perfectly," Santana said, cooing at Lady. Then she seemed to start as she spotted something in the corner of the room. "Oh my God, Britt. Is that your cat?"

I turned to see what she was looking at and saw Lord Tubbington crouched by a table in the corner of the living room.

"Yeah," I giggled. "That's Lord Tubbington."

Santana gave a surprised laugh. "That is the most appropriate name I have ever heard after seeing him," she told me. "That is one fat cat!"

"I honestly don't even feed him that much," I explained. "He has just always been a pudgy kitty. Even when we got him he had a belly on him. That's why I named him that."

"It's just perfect, Britt," she said, smiling at me.

"Well since he is out, I can go ahead and give him his treat if you'd like?"

"I don't know if you should give that cat anymore food," she teased. "He might not be able to walk anymore."

"Hey now, don't insult him," I mock scolded her. "He's still active. Somewhat."

"By all means then, give him the treat," she said, amused.

I got up, careful not to step on Lance as I did, and headed into the kitchen, grabbing the paper bag and pulling out the little fish-shaped treat. I threw the empty bag away and headed back into the living room. I held the treat out toward the cat, whose ears perked up as he realized I had something for him that he could eat. He waddled toward me and I crouched down as I allowed him to take the morsel from my fingers. He practically swallowed it whole, purring the whole time.

"Make sure you thank Santana, Tubbs," I told the cat. "She's the one who brought it for you."

He gave me a scornful look before he turned and looked at Santana on the couch. He made a small mewling noise before promptly turning away and waddling into the kitchen toward his food bowl.

"Did you seriously just tell the cat to thank me and then he did?" Santana asked incredulously.

I shrugged. "Lord Tubbington is more people than cat most of the time."

She shook her head a little, her gaze trailing into the kitchen where I could hear the cat happily crunching on his kibble. I got back onto the couch and got comfortable once again.

"So what do you like to do for fun?" Santana asked before she took another sip of her wine.

"I used to dance when I was younger, but I don't really do that anymore," I confessed. "Now I mostly will watch movies or something like that in my free time."

"You were a dancer?" Santana asked, looking over my body. I nodded. "I can definitely see you being a dancer. Why'd you stop?"

"I mostly didn't have time when I started college," I said. That was mostly the truth. I figured we had discussed enough emotional things tonight that I didn't need to add another one quite yet. "Then after everything that happened, I just didn't feel much like dancing anymore."

"Maybe we could go dancing sometime?" Santana offered hesitantly. "I know Gabe likes to dance, so he would be on board to go. Or you could just try an easy dance class or something if you didn't want us to go with you."

I smiled softly at her. "Maybe," I said. "I think that would be nice."

She smiled back at me, her eyes lighting up. It made my heart flutter again. I took a sip of water to try to settle myself.

"So you said you like movies, but I don't see any in here," she said, looking around the living room with a little confusion. Her confusion made sense, since I had a nice entertainment system set up in there but no movies could be seen.

"I usually watch movies in my bedroom, so they are all in there," I explained. "Most of the time, I will watch Netflix out here or just regular television shows."

"I may have to check out your movie collection then if you are such a big movie enthusiast," she said playfully.

"Sure," I told her. "You can borrow my movies anytime. Are you a big movie fan, too?"

She shrugged a little. "I definitely enjoy a good movie, but I am more partial to books," she confessed.

"A book nerd, huh?" I teased.

She smiled shyly at me. "I guess," she said. "I mean, I have a couple of full bookshelves at home, so if that makes me a book nerd…"

She trailed off and I grinned at her being so cute. "I can totally see you curled up on a nice comfy chair, a mug of something hot to drink and a blanket over your lap with a nice book open before you." She rolled her eyes a little but I could see the hint of a smile. "What's your favorite book?"

"Oh, there are too many to pick just one," she told me passionately. "I mean, I love the Harry Potter books, of course. And the Song of Ice and Fire series is incredible. And I love a lot of the classics like 'Rebecca' and 'Gone With the Wind' and 'Pride and Prejudice'. I can't even list them all."

I giggled a little. "You are definitely a book nerd," I said playfully. "That is really adorable."

"Whatever," Santana scoffed, but she tried to hide her smile against Lady's head that was still lying in her lap. "If you aren't a book nerd yourself, then how did you come up with your dogs' names?"

"Well Sam liked the name Lance, but it was too boring in my opinion," I explained. "Plus, we had already had Lord Tubbington for a few years, so a name like 'Lance' just didn't really fit. So I compromised and told him that if we named him 'Sir Lancelot' then we could call him Lance for short. I got Lady Guin after Sam died, and I felt she needed to have a name that went with her companion's."

"Naturally," Santana said, smiling at me.

We continued to just talk on the couch, learning even more about each other. Santana ended up kicking her heels off and tucking her feet under her. She drank another glass of wine, and we splurged and split the other brownie. I was getting comfortable enough to relax a bit more around her and open up a bit more. I talked to Santana more tonight than I talked to my own family over the past couple of years.

I could feel myself starting to get more tired. My eyelids were starting to droop and it was hard for me to hold them fully open, and it was causing me to try and fight off yawns. I looked at the time and saw that it was already after 11 o'clock. I usually took my nighttime pill before 10pm, so I was obviously being impacted by me not taking my dose on time.

"You look like you're getting tired," Santana said to me after I tried to hide another yawn.

I hated to make her feel like I was bored or something. I really wanted to keep talking to her, but my body was ready for me to get in bed. I was surprised my voice wasn't starting to go out on me yet. As much as I wanted to stay up and keep talking to Santana, I knew I needed to take my pill and go to sleep.

"I'm sorry," I told her. "I really would love to keep talking, but I usually don't stay up this late."

"It's okay," she said honestly. "I should probably head home anyways before it gets too late."

I shook my head. "No, I would really prefer if you stayed here for the night," I said quickly.

That may have come out sounding stranger than I intended, especially since Santana gave me a weird look.

"It's just that… I mean, I know you aren't drunk or anything, but you've been drinking so I would prefer you didn't drive," I explained. "And it is pretty late so I am sure you are probably tired too and I would just feel better if you stayed the night so I didn't have to worry."

Santana looked a little ashamed. "Of course, Brittany. I will stay tonight," she reassured me. "I am an idiot and I didn't think about driving after I had been drinking. I promise I won't do it."

I gave her a small smile. "Thanks," I said quietly.

She nodded to me with a soft smile. I found myself just looking at her, amazed at how she seemed to already be carving a part of my heart for herself. She was so kind and thoughtful and understood that I worried about her and cared enough about me to do as I wished instead of just going home to sleep in her own bed.

"So I guess I should let you get some sleep then," she said, startling me out of my staring.

I blushed a little and looked away, trying to compose myself. I cleared my throat a little. "Yeah, just let me put the dogs out one more time and then I can get you some things to sleep in and show you to the guest room."

"Okay," she said, and she stood up to pick up our glasses from the coffee table and took them into the kitchen.

I would have told her to leave them, but I kind of needed a moment to myself to try to get my head thinking right again. I let Lance and Lady out back one more time. Lady just stood on the porch, uninterested in doing anything. Lance sniffed around a few bushes before he peed and then they both came back in the house. By that time, Santana was back in the living room standing by the couch and waiting for me to show her where to sleep.

I led her down the hallway, giving her a little tour of the house as I went.

"So the bathroom is here," I said, indicating the open door on the right. "The room next to it is my office, and this room is where you will sleep." I opened the door on the left of the hallway, leading her into the guest room.

"This looks comfy," she said, making it clear she was talking about the room as a whole.

"Yeah, I wanted it to feel like someone's real bedroom and not just a guest room," I explained. The walls were painted a soft blue and there was a plain navy comforter on the bed with navy and white striped sheets. There were a couple of pieces of generic artwork on the walls and an oak dresser and nightstand.

"You did a good job," she complimented.

"Let's get you something to sleep in since I'm sure you don't want to go to bed in your clothes," I said.

Santana giggled a little as she shook her head. I led her down to the open door at the end of the hallway, which led into the master bedroom. This was my sanctuary. The walls were painted a warm tan color, which complimented the patterned comforter of varying shades of brown. My sheets were a light brown, and the whole room gave me a sense of comfort. I had some pictures of me and Sam and my family around, but mostly the walls were bare.

"Nice," Santana said with a little awe. I saw she was focused on my movie collection against the wall next to my television. I had an impressive collection.

"You can take a look if you want," I told her, smiling.

She headed over to the shelves, letting her eyes wander over the titles. "Wow, you weren't kidding about being an enthusiast," she said. "You have action, drama, foreign, musicals, romance, black and whites. And you even have like every Disney movie ever made."

I shrugged a little. "I like movies," I said. "They help me escape the real world for awhile."

She looked over at me, an understanding look in her eyes. "That's how I feel about books," she said softly.

I knew why I wanted to escape the real world every once in awhile, but I couldn't imagine why someone like Santana would want to. She looked like she could have everything she could ever want in life. I thought she deserved to have everything she could want, at least. But I understood that, oftentimes, there was way more going on inside a person's mind than they let on.

"Well, feel free to borrow anything that strikes your fancy," I told her.

She looked back at the shelves briefly before turning and grinning at me. "I see you have all of the Harry Potter movies."

"Of course," I said, grinning back. "They are awesome. And I have even read the books, too."

"Oooh, so you do have a little bit of book nerd in you," she teased.

"Maybe a little," I said with a laugh. "At least books that have good movies based off of them."

"Touche," she laughed, coming back over to where I was by the dresser.

"So do you want some pants and a t-shirt? Or would you prefer shorts?" I asked, turning toward my dresser and sliding open the drawer that held my pajamas.

"Pants and a t-shirt would be great."

I pulled out a pair of plaid red pants and the solid red shirt that went with it, handing them to Santana. She smiled in thanks and I pulled out a pair of pajamas for myself. Mine were striped purple bottoms with a light purple shirt.

"I can grab you a toothbrush and stuff if you wanted to go change or whatever," I said, blushing a little as I realized that Santana would be taking her clothes off in the room next to mine.

"Okay," she replied. "Thanks Britt."

She walked out of the room and I put my pajamas onto the bed. Lance and Lady were already lying down on their own beds and Lord Tubbington was curled on the corner of mine. I went into my bathroom and found an unopened toothbrush and grabbed a towel from the linen closet in there. The other bathroom didn't have a linen closet, so I kept all of the spare towels in my bathroom.

I walked out of the bedroom and saw that the other bathroom door was still open, but the spare bedroom's door was closed. I figured Santana must be in the bedroom, so I knocked on the door. Her reply was muffled, but I thought she told me to come in. I opened the door to find Santana bare from the waist up.

My eyes immediately went to her perky, perfect bare breasts. My palms itched with the desire to touch them. I next noticed her flat, toned stomach and my mouth watered at the thought of kissing it. Arousal pooled in my center, and I was more turned on than I could ever remember being in my life. All from seeing another woman topless.

This all happened within a fraction of a second. My eyes flew up as Santana quickly grabbed the pajama top and held it to her chest, embarrassment on her face. My eyes were wide in my own embarrassment and horror, and I could feel my face and ears turning beet red.

"Oh my God! I am so sorry!" I exclaimed, rushing to apologize for walking in on her. "I thought you told me to come in."

"It's okay Britt," she told me. "I mean, it isn't like you haven't seen boobs before." She chuckled.

"Not like that," I blurted. My eyes widened even further and I shook my head, horrified at what I had just said. "Fuck, I mean… just- I haven't seen another woman naked like that in person."

I knew my explanation for my outburst sucked and was barely believable. Mostly because it totally wasn't what I meant, and I was pretty sure Santana could tell. She giggled a little at my reaction and smirked at me. I wanted to avert my gaze, but I found my eyes drawn back down to where she was holding the shirt against her chest. I knew what she looked like behind that piece of fabric now. I would never be able to get the image out of my mind.

I realized I was staring and I forced my eyes back up to Santana's. Her beautiful brown eyes were sparkling, and she was biting her lower lip on a smile. My heart was pounding in my chest and I could feel it all the way between my legs.

"Um, I just wanted to bring you a toothbrush and a towel for if you wanted to shower in the morning," I told her, still blushing furiously. I wondered how I was still standing since I was sure all of the blood in my body was currently in my face. Or at least spread between my face and my throbbing center. "The bathroom has toothpaste and shampoo and all that stuff."

"Okay," she said, still smirking. "Thanks."

I put the items on the dresser in the room since Santana didn't have enough hands to hold the shirt against her chest and take the towel and toothbrush from my grip. I backed away up toward the bedroom door.

"Goodnight, San," I told her, starting to get over my embarrassment a little.

"Goodnight, Britt."

"Sweet boobs," I said. "Dreams! Sweet dreams! Oh my God."

I turned to the door, hiding my mortified face from her. I could hear her laughing behind me. I could just die.

"Sweet dreams to you too," she said, amusement clear in her voice.

I rushed out of the room, pulling the door closed loudly behind me. "Oh my God, you're such a fucking moron," I whispered to myself as I rushed into my bedroom. "She is just a friend, stop thinking about her boobs!"

I shut my bedroom door behind me and prepared for bed, making sure to take my pill. I knew that there was no way I was going to be able to stop thinking about what I had seen tonight. I desperately wanted to do something about the ache that was still present between my thighs, but the thought of doing that while the object of my fantasies was in the next room was too terrifying for me. It was going to be a long night.

 **A/N: Wow, so much happened this chapter! So I hope I didn't make any of you mad with the whole Sam reveal. Brittany was always going to have been married in this story and I was originally going to have her be married to some random person, but then I realized that Sam just fit really well into the role and went with that. There will be more revealed about their relationship later, but just be comforted that Brittany definitely has never felt the way she is feeling about Santana before. What do you all think about her big reveal?**

 **It looks as though Brittany's gaydar is pretty nonexistent! Do you guys think she will ever realize Santana is into her? And how about her walking in on Santana at the end? They are getting to know each other a lot better and are getting more comfortable around each other, so that's good right?**

 **For the guest reviewer who said that Gabe provides the common ground between them- you are absolutely right! He provides a link between Santana and Brittany and is the reason why they met, so he is a way to bring them together. I love the response I've gotten so far from the story, so thank you guys! Keep reviewing and following or whatever, and you can check out my tumblr too.**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

My alarm went off at the usual time the next morning. I took my morning pill and got out of bed and headed to the bathroom to relieve my bladder. I went into the kitchen and fed the dogs and cat. The dogs inhaled their food, as usual, and when they were finished I went to let them out back so they could relieve their own bladders.

I heard a noise behind me as the dogs were still taking care of their business. I turned to find a sleep ruffled Santana. She looked absolutely adorable wearing my pajamas, the pants of which were slightly too long on her. Her hair was still messy and her face was a little puffy from just waking up.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," I apologized, trying not to smile too big at how cute she looked in the morning.

"Do you always get up this early on the weekends?" Santana asked a little grumpily, her normally raspy voice even raspier than usual.

"I just keep my alarm set for the same time every day so I keep the dogs' routines the same. They are used to going out in the morning and eating every day at this time, so I feel bad making them wait longer on the weekends," I explained. "But I usually just feed them and let them out and then go back to bed for a few more hours."

"Oh," she said, disgruntled at getting out of bed for no reason.

"I really am sorry," I apologized again. "I hope my alarm wasn't too loud."

She shook her head a little, tucking her hair behind her ears. "No, I just heard you moving around and thought that you normally got up at this time," she told me. "I didn't want to keep sleeping if you were going to be up."

Lance and Lady finished up outside and came back in the door. I closed it behind them and locked it.

"We can go back to bed and sleep," I offered. "Or, if you want, we can relax out here on the couch and put some crappy morning TV on and if we fall asleep then we fall asleep."

She gave me a little smile. "We can do the couch."

I smiled back at her, pleased with her answer. We settled on the couch much the same way we had last night, with her on one end and me on the other. Only this time she stretched her legs out toward me as she leaned back and I moved my own legs out of the way so she could get comfortable. I pulled a blanket off of the back of the couch and draped it over both of us. I turned the television on and started scrolling through the guide.

"Anything in particular you want me to put it on?" I asked her.

"It doesn't matter to me," she said on a yawn. "I plan on falling back asleep."

I giggled a little at her and she smiled back. I found that there was a Phineas and Ferb marathon on the Disney Channel, so I put it on there and settled in since I had seen all of the episodes enough times that I would probably fall asleep as well.

"What is this?" Santana asked.

"How do you not know Phineas and Ferb?" I asked with mock surprise. "It's only one of the best cartoons ever!"

"Sorry, I'm not much of a cartoon person," she shrugged.

"Well trust me, you will like this one," I told her.

Sure enough, it was only a few minutes before she was giggling at the antics of Dr. Doofenshmirtz and Perry. Her giggle made me smile. I watched her a little out of the corner of my eye. She was so pretty and cute, especially when she was all relaxed like she was now.

I could tell she was starting to get sleepy as her giggles started to fade and her breathing deepened. It wasn't too long before she was completely out and I took the opportunity to look at her fully. She looked so peaceful as she slept. I was a little surprised at the difference I noticed in her while she was sleeping. It was as if every weight she carried around was gone. I wondered what she had gone through to make her feel that heavy.

I had the strong urge to cuddle up to her, but I already felt like a creeper for watching her. I really would love to feel her body next to mine as we slept, but I settled for adjusting myself a little so my legs were touching hers as I stretched out a little more on the couch. I was getting more sleepy, so I closed my eyes and fell asleep, soothed by the feel of Santana's warmth.

The next thing I knew, I was blinking my eyes open to harsh morning light streaming in the back doors. Lance came over to the couch, apparently seeing me move as I woke up. He panted in my face, which was his sign to me that he wanted to go outside. I sat up and looked around him to the clock. It was just after 9am, so I had been sleeping for about two and a half hours on the couch. I usually didn't sleep quite this late on the weekends, but it had been a late night so I wasn't necessarily surprised.

Santana was still sleeping, so I tried not to disturb her as much as I could as I got off the couch to let the dogs out. I wasn't very successful however, since once I started to pull my legs around to put my feet on the floor Santana mewled and her eyes fluttered open. She looked a little confused for a moment before her eyes settled on me.

"Sorry," I said, throwing her an apologetic look. "I didn't mean to wake you, but Lance wants out."

"It's okay," she told me, her voice groggy. "What time is it?"

"A little after nine," I said as I got up to let the dogs out.

Santana sat up on the couch behind me, pulling her knees up to her chest. She still looked sleepy and I felt bad for accidentally waking her up twice.

"It's still early," she whined.

I laughed at how child-like she was being. So cute. "This is actually late for me," I said. "I'm sorry but I don't have any coffee. I do have hot chocolate though, if you would like that instead."

I didn't like coffee, so I didn't have any in the house. I knew Santana couldn't do much without a cup of coffee in the mornings however, since it was one of the things she told me during our text conversations.

"Hot chocolate sounds really good, actually," she said with a smile.

I smiled back, then closed the back door since the dogs both came back in the house. "I can make some breakfast too, if you want," I offered. "I could do eggs and bacon, or pancakes, or even waffles."

"Mmmm, pancakes would be delicious," she enthused. "But you really don't have to cook for me. I can grab something on my way home or whatever."

I felt disappointment crashing down on me. It seemed like Santana was in a bit of a hurry to leave. I enjoyed having her around, and actually was kind of hoping she would like to stay.

"It's no problem at all," I reassured her. "I mean, if you have something to do and you need to leave then that's okay. But I kind of would like to hang out some more if you didn't have anything going on."

Wow, where had this confident Brittany come from? Asking a girl that I had a crush on to stay instead of going home like she had suggested. That was so not typical of me.

"I don't have anything planned for today," Santana told me. "I just figured you'd want me out of your hair."

I shook my head. "I like spending time with you," I confessed. "I would love it if you stayed."

She smiled shyly at me. "Then I will most definitely stay."

I grinned. "Awesome! I can go make breakfast and you can pick out a movie for us to watch."

"Britt, I can help make breakfast," she said.

"No way," I told her sternly as I walked toward the kitchen. "You are a guest and I will take care of the food. You can take care of the entertainment."

"Okay. Can we watch Harry Potter?" Santana asked bashfully.

I threw a grin over my shoulder. "If that's what you want to watch then that is perfect with me."

I went in the kitchen and pulled out the griddle and a small pot. I filled the pot with water and put it on to warm for the hot chocolate, and I turned the griddle on to heat it up as I began to mix the pancake batter. Once all of the ingredients were mixed, the griddle was up to temperature. I spooned the batter onto the griddle. I debated making the pancakes into shapes, but then I figured that Santana would probably think that was too childish so I didn't.

After the water was sufficiently heated, I added removed it from the heat and added the hot chocolate mix. I poured the hot chocolate into two mugs and let it sit to cool for a moment. I went back to the griddle and started to pull of the now cooked pancakes. I piled them all onto a single plate for the time being.

"Would you like whipped cream on your hot chocolate?" I yelled into the living room.

"Sure," Santana answered, her voice coming from the kitchen doorway and making me give a startled jump.

I turned and gave her an apologetic smile for being so loud, not realizing that she had been standing there. I pulled out the whipped cream and dispensed generous amounts into both mugs.

"Butter and syrup for the pancakes?" I asked as I put the can of whipped cream back into the fridge.

"Yes, please," she replied.

I pulled out the butter and went to the pantry and got the container of maple syrup. I set them both on the counter by the pancakes and then pulled down two plates and got out a butter knife and two forks from the silverware drawer. Once everything was set out, I indicated that Santana could serve herself.

Santana smiled gratefully as she walked over. She selected a couple of pancakes and dressed them up how she liked. I put three pancakes onto my own plate, opting to use only syrup on them this morning. We both grabbed a mug of hot chocolate and sat down at the kitchen table.

We ate in relative silence, apart from the clatter of our forks on the plate or the occasional sounds of satisfaction at the meal. Santana ended up getting a couple more pancakes, but I was finished after my first plate. Once we were finished eating, I put the dirty dishes into the dishwasher and we took the rest of our hot chocolate into the living room to settle in to watch the movie.

I saw that Santana had picked Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. "You wanted to start at the beginning, huh?" I asked teasingly.

She just shrugged. "It's hard to pick up a series right in the middle, even if it is one you know by heart," she explained.

"I get it," I told her. And I did. I am the same way, and I would have picked the same one had I wanted to watch a movie in the series.

I set the entertainment system up appropriately and put the disc in. We got comfortable on the couch and focused on the screen. This was one of my favorite movies to watch. It was always hard for me to concentrate on anything other than a movie when I was watching one, especially since they were my escape. But Harry Potter was always one that sucked me completely in, regardless.

I assumed Santana was just as engrossed in the movie as I was, but I only looked over at her a couple of times during the movie. She was always focused on the screen when I looked. I was mostly just aware of her presence on the couch near me. It was almost as if I could feel her body heat all the way over the few feet separating us. I wondered in the back of my mind if I would always have that general tingling awareness in my body when she was close by.

The movie finished before 12:30pm. I knew that by this time of day, Santana was probably wanting to get dressed and do something other than sit on my couch. I also realized that I hadn't taken my next pill yet. Hanging around Santana was throwing me off of my schedule. I stopped the movie and put the television back onto the proper settings to watch cable.

"I am gonna go ahead and take these mugs into the kitchen," I told her as I grabbed both of our empty hot chocolate mugs. Santana nodded at me.

I had left my pills in my bedroom, so I put the mugs into the dishwasher and walked back down the hallway toward my room. I noticed Santana was no longer on the couch as I walked by, but I didn't really register the fact. I went into my room and located my pills on my nightstand. I got one out and swallowed it down with a sip of water from the bottle next to them.

"Are you okay?" I heard from the doorway. I jumped a little in surprise. Thankfully I had already swallowed, otherwise I would have started choking.

I turned to find Santana standing just outside of my bedroom, a concerned look on her face. I gave her a reassuring smile. "Yeah, I'm fine," I told her. "What's up?"

Santana gave me a strange look for a moment before she decided not to push her concern further. "Gabe texted me earlier asking me how you liked your shirt, and I realized that I totally forgot to bring it over last night," she explained.

"Oh, that's okay," I told her. I had completely forgotten that she was supposed to bring me a signed shirt anyways. Not that I wasn't grateful to Gabe for doing it, but I was more interested in Santana coming over than Gabe's autograph. "You can just get it to me another time."

"Well, I was actually kind of wondering if maybe you wanted to come with me to my place and get it," Santana said a little shyly. "And then I could change into some clean clothes and we could go out for lunch or something? If you wanted to."

I smiled at her. Inside I was doing a little happy dance. Of course I wanted to spend more time with Santana! I just hoped that I wasn't too obvious with my excitement on the outside.

"That sounds like fun," I told her honestly. "I can grab a shower real quick and get ready. Did you want to shower here and then change at home? Or were you wanting to shower there?"

"I can shower here really quick, so that way all I have to do is change and stuff when we get there. Then we can go get some lunch," she offered.

"Awesome," I said. "Everything you need should be in the bathroom there. If you need anything then just yell. I can give you something to wear too, if you don't want to put on what you wore last night."

"That's okay, I can just wear my clothes," she said. She gave me a smile before she turned around and headed to start getting ready.

I showered quickly and got dressed. I opted for a pair of dark jeans, my purple Chucks, and a hoodie. I hoped that the casual look was okay. I put on a bit of light make up and dried my hair a bit leaving it to lie in loose waves, before I went out into the living room to wait on Santana.

I didn't have to wait too long. She came into the room in her clothes from last night, her hair still damp but pulled up into a messy bun. She looked refreshed after her shower.

"You ready to go?" Santana asked me.

I nodded. "Yeah, let me put the dogs outside really quick one more time before we leave."

She nodded to me and smiled, and I opened the door to let the dogs outside to go potty. They were quick as usual, and after they came back in Santana and I got our things and headed out to the driveway where she was parked. She drove a newer model black Mazda 6 and it looked gorgeous.

"Nice car," I told her.

She grinned at me. "Thanks."

We got in and she headed out. We made some small talk on the drive, before talking about where we wanted to go for lunch. Santana suggested a deli not too far from her place, and said we could walk to it if we wanted since the weather was a little warmer today. I thought that was a pretty good idea, so we had a plan.

She parked in a parking garage and then led me to her unit. After she opened the front door, I could tell her place was incredibly nice, just as I had suspected. There was a small entryway with a coat closet, then it opened into the living room on the right and the dining area on the left. The dining area was separated from the modern looking kitchen by a counter, creating an open space. The kitchen also had an opening into the hallway, which had several doorways that I assumed led to bedrooms and a bathroom.

Santana led me into the living room, where she had the shirt sitting on the coffee table in front of two incredibly comfortable looking couches. She had a nice television and a small desk with a laptop on it, but most of the room was taken up by several large shelves packed with books. Not only was there tons of fiction, but there was several law books and other texts.

"A couple of bookshelves, huh Tana?" I teased with a giggle.

Santana rolled her eyes at me with a smile. "Here's your shirt," she said as she tossed it at my face.

I broke out into laughter as I caught the shirt. I unfolded it all the way and saw that it was a t-shirt for the current season of the Blue Jackets. Gabe had signed it with the inscription 'To Brittany, Thanks for being a great friend!' And he had gotten several other members of the team to sign it as well.

"This is so great!" I enthused. "Your brother is really awesome."

She smiled at me, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. "Yeah, he is," she said. "I'm going to go change and everything really quick. I'll be right back."

"Okay," I said, a little confused by her seemingly abrupt change in attitude. We had just been joking around and having fun, and then all of a sudden Santana seemed to tense up and withdraw into herself a little bit after she gave me the shirt. I didn't understand it.

I sat down on the couch and practically melted into it with as comfortable as it was. I definitely could get used to sitting on one of these. The only problem was I would probably end up falling asleep pretty quickly if I stayed on it for too long.

I refolded my t-shirt and thought about Santana while I waited for her. I wasn't sure how I was going to stop the feelings I was developing for her. But if I wanted to keep our friendship, which I desperately did, then I needed to figure out a way to stop thinking of her romantically and just be her friend. Because I didn't see a way in which someone like Santana, who was poised and beautiful and driven and confident, could have feelings for someone like me.

I was lost in my thoughts when Santana came back into the room, making me focus my attention on her. She was wearing jeans and flat slouch boots that came mid-way up her calves with a plain green long-sleeved shirt. She had put her hair up in a neat ponytail, curls trailing down toward her back.

"Is walking there still okay?" Santana asked as I stood up.

"That's fine with me," I told her.

I put my signed shirt with my purse and just grabbed some money and my phone out of it. I tucked the items into my pockets and followed Santana toward the front door. She grabbed a tight black leather jacket out of the closet by the door and slipped it on. She looked incredibly sexy in the jacket. It wasn't helping me to try to think of her only as a friend.

I could feel the little bit of a blush tint my cheeks as my thoughts turned less than friendly, but thankfully Santana led the way out into the brisk air so I could blame my rosy cheeks on that. We walked in comfortable silence to the deli, which only ended up being less than ten minutes away. We got our food and sat at a table to dig in.

It was only a couple minutes into our meal when Santana broke our relative silence. "Britt, can I ask you something personal?"

I set down my sandwich and looked at her, a little bit of trepidation creeping into my chest. "Sure," I answered, unsure if I would like what she was going to ask. What if she was going to talk about what she had seen in my bedroom earlier?

She bit her lip nervously before meeting my eyes. "How come you haven't tried dating since Sam died?"

I definitely wasn't expecting that. My surprise must have shown on my face, because Santana looked a little uncomfortable.

"Sorry, it really isn't any of my business," she apologized.

I shook my head a little, trying to break myself out of my shocked daze. "No, it's okay," I reassured her. I hesitated for a moment before I started to explain why I was not dating. "I guess I haven't really expected anyone to want to go out with me. I mean, I wasn't okay for awhile after the accident and I withdrew into myself a lot. And once I was doing better I never really expected to find someone. I was always bad at meeting and talking to new people, so it wasn't like I could really get dates very easily."

"So it isn't because you are still grieving?" Santana asked kindly.

"No," I confessed. "I will always grieve for him, but I would be willing to date if I found the right person. Or, I guess I should probably say if the right person found me, because I don't think I could actively look with my inability to have normal conversations with strangers."

I laughed a little at myself, but Santana only gave me a kind of sad smile. "You don't have too much of a hard time talking with me and Gabe," she said.

I shrugged, honestly not understanding why that was the case. "I don't know why I am more comfortable with you guys than anyone else," I told her. "Honestly, I think it is because you both are so nice and laid back and you don't seem like you judge me. You guys came into my life at a moment when I really needed some friends, and maybe subconsciously I knew that I needed you in my life."

Santana started to truly smile then, but her smile quickly faded as she focused on something behind me. I frowned at the little bit of fear I could see in her eyes.

"Santana!" I heard someone exclaim nearby. "How nice to see you."

I turned to see a beautiful brunette with sparkling green eyes approach our table. My frown deepened as I saw the woman. I had an inherent dislike for her, though I didn't know why.

"Hi Courtney," Santana said unenthusiastically. She was definitely not happy to see this woman and it made me want to rush Santana away from here so she didn't have to deal with the green-eyed girl.

"What, no hug?" Courtney asked mockingly.

I narrowed my eyes at her as I saw Santana stiffen out of the corner of my eye.

"What do you want? As you can see, I'm busy," Santana told the woman, her voice biting. I could definitely detect anger and an underlying sense of hurt in Santana's voice. I really wanted Courtney gone now.

"Finally moving on? Took you long enough," Courtney said. "I mean, I know I'm a hard act to follow, but you couldn't find anyone better than this one?"

I clenched my jaw as anger shot through me at the insult, both to me and to Santana. I turned to look at Santana, who had balled her hands into fists and was looking down at her food, refusing to meet anyone's eyes. My concern for Santana outweighed my desire to punch Santana's ex in the face.

"Do you want to go home, Tana?" I asked her softly.

She looked up at me and I could see the gratefulness at my offer in her eyes. I gave her a little smile as I reached out and put my hand over one of her tight fists, trying to soothe her.

"Wow, you must be even more whipped than you were with me," Courtney broke in, her voice still mocking. "I wasn't even allowed to call you Tana."

I was just about to go off on Courtney for treating Santana like crap when my beautiful friend beat me to it.

"Courtney, stop being such a bitch and leave us alone," she bit out. "Britt is my best friend and she cares for me more than you ever did, so she can call me whatever she wants to. Now why don't you go find whatever skank you're hustling so we can actually eat our food without wanting to vomit at the sight of your face."

My heart soared at Santana calling me her best friend. It was nice to know that she cared so much about me, especially to the point where I was allowed to do something like call her a special nickname. I hadn't even realized how big of a deal that was to her, particularly since I had already done it a couple of times now and she hadn't made any indication that I shouldn't call her that.

My satisfaction continued as Courtney looked shocked that Santana actually stood up to her, much less was rude to her. I wondered what had happened between them, but it was obvious that Courtney had hurt Santana deeply in the past. I had to admit that I was a little jealous that Santana had had feelings for this woman, but it wasn't like I was dating her so I had no place to be jealous.

Courtney opened her mouth to say something, but I interrupted before she could. "You heard her," I said rudely. "You should leave. We don't want you here."

My face was flushed, both from anger and from the anxiety of talking that way to someone I didn't know. My hands were shaking a little, and I tried forcing myself to calm down.

"Fine," Courtney said. "I'll see you around Santana."

She turned away with a final flirtatious wink at my friend, making me clench my jaw again at her audacity. She had just insulted Santana and then still tried flirting with her.

Santana let out a loud breath and I turned my attention back to her. She was still tense, so I squeezed my hand over hers reassuringly. She smiled at me and relaxed, her hands no longer balled into fists and her shoulders no longer stiff.

"Thanks, Britt," she said.

I nodded to her. "No problem," I said sincerely. I had so many questions I wanted to ask, but I didn't think now was the time.

Santana must have known what I was thinking. "I promise I will explain sometime," she told me. "Just not today, okay?"

"You can tell me whatever you want, whenever you want San," I said. "I'll be here for whatever you need."

She gave me a grateful smile and we turned our attention back to our food. We tried not to let Courtney's interruption ruin our lunch, but there was a definite change to the atmosphere of our meal from before. I only hoped that my status at Santana's best friend allowed me to be privileged enough to find out everything I could about Santana. I wanted to be there for her however I could, just the same way that she had already been there for me.

 **A/N: True story- I LOVE Phineas and Ferb! I totally think Brittany would love it, too. It seems right up her alley.**

 **Anyways, how cute is it that they didn't want to stop spending time with each other? And it appears Santana may have caught Brittany taking a pill. I know a lot of you are curious about those, and you will find out about them soon since Santana is aware of them now. How big of a bitch is Courtney? But Brittany stood up to her, which is pretty amazing for her right?**

 **What do you guys think? What are Brittany's pills for? Do you think Brittany will realize Santana likes her soon?**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Much to my relief, our afternoon wasn't ruined. We finished our lunch and settled back into the easy comfort we had with each other. Well, as much easy comfort as I could have around Santana considering the general tingling in my body and increased heartbeat when I was near her.

We walked back to her apartment and she showed me the rest of her place. She had more of a modern look to her apartment, with the exception of the living room with the wooden bookshelves and big, comfy couches. Her guest bedroom was more bare than mine, with just a bed and a nightstand. The main bathroom had dark cabinets with stainless steel fixtures, and she had decorated with a dark grey shower curtain.

Her own bedroom was also dark. She had grey walls and a black comforter with black and white patterned sheets. Her furniture was dark wood and was very functional, with minimal decoration. Santana had decorated her own room with some geometric art and a few family pictures on her dresser. The room was clean, but there was an inherent sense of messiness, like the scattered items on the dresser and the drawers not pushed all the way in.

Overall, Santana's home seemed to fit her perfectly. The modern look suited the way she presented herself, as a chic professional woman. But the room I knew she spent the most time in, which was the living room, was cozy and made for comfort, much the way Santana was softer on the inside. I thought it was perfect.

I looked at her book collection more closely and was amazed at the variety of books she had. I could tell she took good care of her books, but there were some that were more loved than others, as evidenced by the worn bindings. The Harry Potter books were obviously read often, but so were some Michael Crichton titles and various classics, such as Great Expectations and A Tale of Two Cities. Santana's taste in books was much like my taste in movies, which was all over the spectrum.

By the time she finished showing me around her apartment and I was done nosing through her books, it was after 3:30pm.

"So are you still wanting to hang out some more?" Santana asked quietly after we settled down on her couch.

"I would love to do something else with you, if you aren't sick of me yet," I told her with a smile.

"I could never be sick of you," she laughed. "What do you want to do?"

I shrugged. I didn't really have much of an idea of what to do with Santana. "It doesn't matter much to me," I said. "Did you have something you wanted to do?"

"I need to find some new shoes for work, so we could always go to the mall," she offered.

"I'm sure this trip to the mall would involve the bookstore as well, am I right?" I asked with a teasing smile.

She chuckled. "Maybe. But if you would rather do something else…" Santana trailed off.

"No, the mall is fine," I said. "Besides, I would love to have some company at the mall. I hate going by myself."

I made sure to grab my purse and shirt before we left her apartment. We went to Santana's car and she decided to head back over toward the shopping available off of Polaris Parkway since it was close to my house, and she would need to drop me back home when we were done for the day.

Shopping with Santana was fun. She made fun of things she thought looked ugly and I was laughing so hard with her comments that I felt like my face was going to quit working. She got me to try on several things she thought would look good on me, but, even though she tried to get me to get them, I didn't buy anything. Santana ended up buying a couple of pairs of heels. They definitely looked sexy on her, but I still didn't know how she could walk in those all day. I kind of preferred the little height difference between us when she was wearing flat shoes, but I wouldn't complain when she wore heels.

We spent a lot of time walking the mall and finished up at the bookstore. I went in prepared for Santana to linger there, and I wasn't disappointed. I enjoyed watching her face light up as she walked into the store, taking time to check out different titles and reading a few pages before deciding whether she was interested or not. I wasn't bored at all, although I think Santana was afraid that I was. I figured she rushed through the bookstore faster than she would normally, since forty-five minutes later she had only selected a couple of books and headed toward the checkout.

She wouldn't listen when I told her that she could look for longer if she wanted to.

"It's already six, Britt," Santana explained. "I figured we should probably get dinner."

I honestly hadn't paid attention to the time. I was having too much fun with Santana. Now I was late on taking my next pill once again, and I was starting to feel it. I knew that we should probably head out and get some dinner then, particularly so I could get something to drink to take my next dose.

"Okay," I said. "What do you want to do for dinner?"

Santana shrugged a little. "I thought you probably wanted to get back to the dogs," she began, "so we could maybe pick up some take-out or something and head back to your place to eat."

I smiled at her thoughtfulness. "Sounds great," I agreed.

We decided to call in a pizza and pick it up on the way to my house. We walked back to the car after I called in our order and drove to the pizza place to get it. The traffic was kind of bad since it was Saturday night and everyone was out to go get dinner or go to the mall, so we had a good chunk of time to make sure the pizza was done by the time we got there.

Thirty minutes later we were finally pulling up to my house. I knew I needed to hurry and take my pill, so I hurried to the door, pizza in hand, and unlocked it before making my way quickly into the kitchen. The dogs were following closely behind me, excited for me to be home.

I set the pizza down on the counter and pulled down a glass from the cupboard. I filled it with water and grabbed my pill container out of my purse. I quickly got one out and swallowed it with a drink of water.

I knew Santana had seen, since she was right behind me the whole way into the kitchen. I turned around and, sure enough, she was watching me with a concerned look on her face.

"Is everything okay?" Santana asked. I could tell she was curious to know what was going on with me, but she didn't want to pry too much.

I sighed. I knew I couldn't avoid telling her anymore. Especially after the way I had pretty much ran into the house to take my pill.

"Yeah, everything is okay," I reassured her. "I just have to take one of these four times a day."

Her brows scrunched a little. "I don't know if it is any of my business," she began, "but what are they for?"

I looked down at the floor briefly before looking back up. I wasn't ashamed of anything. I don't know why I was hesitating to tell her.

"They're for my myasthenia gravis," I told her.

Her brow scrunched further as confusion took over. "Your what now?"

I smiled a little, understanding her confusion at the unfamiliar disease. "I have an autoimmune disease called myasthenia gravis," I explained. "Basically my immune system attacks my muscles and they get really weak. I have to take these pills so I can walk, talk, eat, and breathe pretty much."

Her eyes got really wide at that. "You mean you won't breathe if you don't take these pills?" Santana asked loudly. I could hear the slight bit of fear and even anger in her voice. "Why didn't you say anything? I know that you were freaking out a little just now when you took it. Were you afraid for me to find out?"

"No, Santana," I broke in. "It isn't quite like that." I took a breath and let it out in a slow exhale. "Here, just let me let the dogs out and feed them really quick, and then we can sit down and eat and I will explain it. Okay?"

Santana crossed her arms in front of her chest, and, although she didn't look happy about it, she nodded in agreement. I gave her a grateful smile and went to let the dogs out back. The break gave me the opportunity to calm myself down and think of the best way to talk about my disease. It also gave me the opportunity to think of why it was I hadn't told Santana already. I kind of wasn't pleased with what I was coming up with.

Once Lance and Lady came back inside, I fed them and put some more food in Lord Tubbington's bowl. Santana had already gotten some plates out and had set them on the table along with the pizza. She had put my glass of water by one plate and had gotten a glass of water for herself. She was sitting in her chair, waiting for me to finish and join her.

I sat down and got a couple of pieces of pizza out and put them on my plate. Santana grabbed a couple of pieces for herself, and I decided the best thing to do was jump right in.

"Okay, so the thing about myasthenia gravis is that the more I use my muscles, the weaker they get," I explained. "So I tend to get weaker later on in the day, and since I was late taking that dose I was starting to feel a little weak. That was why I was in a hurry to take it."

"Why didn't you take it earlier then, when you were supposed to take it?" Santana asked.

"To be honest, I wasn't really paying attention to the time," I told her. "I was having a lot of fun with you and I didn't realize it was that late."

"So you weren't trying to hide it from me?"

I looked down at my pizza, a little ashamed at my answer to this question. "I really did just forget today. The thing is I wasn't necessarily trying to hide it from you, but I didn't really want you to know yet."

"Why?" The hurt in Santana's voice caused me to look up at her. I hated to see the look of pain in her eyes, especially knowing that I had caused it.

"I just didn't want you to think of me any differently," I said. "It had been so long since I had a friend and I guess I was kind of afraid that if you knew I had this… I don't know… limitation I guess, that you wouldn't want to hang out with me."

"Brittany, I would never think that you were any less amazing because of this," she told me sincerely.

I smiled gratefully at her, relieved at finally getting it off of my chest and Santana accepting me the way I was. "Thank you," I said, tears starting to pool in my eyes.

"So do I need to worry about you collapsing on me and not breathing or anything?" Santana asked, a hint of worry in her voice.

I shook my head. "The odds of that happening are really slim as long as I take my medication," I told her. "It can happen if I get really stressed or something triggers a bad reaction, and if that happens for some reason, then just call 911 and make sure they see this." I pulled up my sleeve to show her the medical ID bracelet I wore on my wrist.

"Okay," she said as she nodded. "Is there anything else I need to know?"

"I might get weaker at night if we hang out late, even if I do take my pills," I explained. "I can have some bad days, so if my eyelids get really droopy, or my smile seems weird, or even if my voice sounds funny then I should probably rest or go to bed. But usually, if I take my meds regularly, then I am fine throughout the day."

"Promise me you will take your pills on time then," Santana demanded. "If you need me to remind you, then I will. I don't want you not taking care of yourself."

I was touched by Santana's concern for me, even if her overprotective attitude made me chuckle a little. "I will do my best," I promised.

Santana shook her head. "Not good enough. What time do you usually take your pills?"

"Seriously?" Santana just looked at me, clearly waiting for me to respond. "My first dose I take when my alarm goes off before 6am."

A look of recognition crossed Santana's face. "That's why your alarm goes off and you get out of bed so early on the weekends," she guessed.

I nodded. "Yeah, I have to take my pill and my alarm wakes me to do it, so I just get up and let the dogs out and stuff since I know my alarm wakes them up too." Santana nodded in understanding. "My second dose I take between 11:30 and noon usually. Then my third pill around 5pm. My last pill I take around bedtime, usually after 9pm."

"So you were late taking your pill twice today," Santana realized, and her mouth tightened.

I looked at her guiltily. "Yeah."

"Well that's not going to happen anymore when you are with me," she stated determinedly.

I laughed a little. "Thanks for your concern, San, but I've been doing a pretty good job of taking care of myself for years now."

"Britt, I can't stand by if I know you have forgotten to take your medicine," Santana told me.

I understood that Santana was worried about me, and she didn't want my forgetfulness to make me have problems with my health. I could tell that she wasn't going to let it go, either, so I figured I should just accept the fact that she was going to try to take care of me whether I liked it or not.

I gave her a slight nod, indicating that I was going to let her take on some of this burden even though I was reluctant to do so. "Okay, San."

She let out a relieved breath. "Good," she said. "So is this something you've always had?"

I shook my head as I took a bite of my pizza. I chewed and swallowed quickly so I could answer. "No, I was diagnosed within the year after Sam and I got married," I said.

"How did you find out?" Santana asked, taking a bite of her own pizza.

"I started having symptoms my freshman year at MIT, although I didn't know it at the time," I explained. "My voice would get weird at the end of the night sometimes and I felt like my eyes were tired a lot. I had been concentrating so much on my classes and wedding planning and was under a lot of stress, so I didn't really think too much of it. I was also feeling a little more physically tired, but I had gained a little weight so I thought I had just gotten out of shape since I wasn't dancing as much anymore."

Santana nodded as I paused to take another bite. After I swallowed, I continued my story. "After the wedding, things got worse. I had decided to take a dance class since I thought I had gotten too out of shape, so when my second year started I enrolled in a dance class as well. I noticed right away that I wasn't able to keep up with the types of things I used to be able to do, but thought it was because of the little bit of weight I had put on. But as the weeks went on, it kept getting worse. It got to the point where I had a hard time holding my school books on campus and I often dropped them because I got so weak. I had no clue what was going on, but it wasn't until I started having trouble swallowing food and water that I knew something was seriously wrong."

"Geez, Britt," Santana said, concern in her eyes. "That must have been so scary."

I nodded. "It was," I confessed. "I made a doctor's appointment as soon as I could, and Sam went with me because he was as worried as I was. Thankfully the doctor realized something serious was going on and got me into a neurologist right away, and the neurologist immediately started me on my medication due to the amount of weakness I was having and he ran a bunch of tests. All of the tests came back positive for myasthenia gravis, and they found a tumor on my thymus gland in my chest, which often goes along with it."

Santana's eyes widened. "Was it cancer?"

"No, but they needed to remove it in case it did turn malignant," I told her. "So I have a nice scar now where they cracked my chest open. They hoped that removing my thymus gland would put me into remission eventually, but it didn't. That's why I am glad that my medication works so well, because I may have had to take steroids or other drugs that were more harmful."

"So you've been dealing with this for what… like seven years?" Santana asked.

"Just about, yeah," I confirmed.

"Can you die from it?" Her voice was timid as she asked.

"It isn't likely, but it is possible. If I go into a myasthenic crisis, where the muscles that control my breathing become really weak, and if I can't get to the hospital and on a breathing machine then I could die. Or if food gets stuck in my throat because I can't swallow and I choke, but that is possible for like anyone. The odds of me dying from it are really low, so you really don't need to worry, San."

She still looked a little scared, but she seemed to be resolved about me being okay. I watched as she seemed to push her worry out of her mind. "Is this why you stopped dancing?"

I was a little surprised that she asked me that. I didn't think she would wonder about that after what I had told her yesterday, but I guess she remembered more about what I told her than I expected her to.

"Yeah, it was the biggest reason," I said. "I didn't have the energy to begin with, and then I couldn't dance for a little while after my surgery. It took a few months to get me regulated really well on my medication, and even then I had lost some muscle mass from being so weak and less active for so long. I started to get a little more active a few months before Sam died, and then after the accident I just didn't have much desire to dance."

Santana bit her lip a little nervously. "Would you be able to go out dancing then? Or would it be too much for you to do that?"

I could tell she was concerned that her offer to go out dancing with me and Gabe would be too hard on my body. "I would love to go out dancing," I reassured her. "I mean, I might not be able to do as much as I used to be able to do when I was younger, but I can still dance."

I smiled at her, hoping she understood that I really wanted to go dancing with her. She gave me a relieved smile back, and I was glad that she was okay with going out dancing with me.

"I can make sure you take it easy, but I think it will be fun for you to go out dancing again," she said.

"I think so too," I told her.

We concentrated on eating our food for a few minutes. The pizza was okay, but my mind wasn't really on the food. I had revealed so much to Santana over the past twenty-four hours. Much more than I had told anyone else in a long time. I felt that much closer to her already, and I was glad that me unloading such big things on her didn't send her running for the door.

"Can I ask you something else?" Santana suddenly asked as I was finishing up my second slice.

"Sure," I said around the bite of pizza in my mouth.

"Does alcohol affect your myasthenia… gravis?" Santana asked, stumbling a little over the unfamiliar disease.

"Myasthenia gravis," I confirmed for her, pleased that she actually got it right considering most people couldn't remember it. Sadly even most nurses I came across didn't know what it was, but Santana was incredibly smart and was a lawyer, so I wasn't too surprised she could learn it quickly. "And, yeah, it can. Alcohol, the rare times I did drink it, mostly just made me really relaxed and sleepy. So after I got diagnosed, it made sense not to drink it because it would just make my symptoms worse."

"So you weren't exactly telling the truth when you said why you didn't drink," she said.

My eyes widened a little at her accusation. She wasn't being mean by it, but I hated her thinking I had lied to her about anything. "No, everything I told you was the truth," I promised. "I never really liked alcohol and I rarely drank. After I was diagnosed, it just gave me that much more reason to not drink anyways, which wasn't a problem. And after Sam's accident, I definitely had no desire to drink at all anymore."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you think I was mad at you or anything," Santana apologized, looking down at the table. "I'm not, but I just didn't want to think you weren't telling me the truth about something." She looked back up to meet my eyes. "Because you can tell me anything, I hope you know that."

My heart fluttered a little at the look in her eyes. She was looking at me so softly, with such care in her gaze. It made me want to confess the way I was feeling for her, but I was afraid that if I did then she would be scared off. Surely if she was interested in me, she would have made it known by now. Right?

I settled for giving her a grateful smile. "Thanks, Tana," I said. "It really means a lot to me knowing that. And you can tell me anything, too."

She smiled back at me. We finished our food, moving on to much lighter topics. I cleared our dishes and put the leftover pizza in the fridge. It was after 7 o'clock now, and Santana and I had been together for 24 hours. Not _together_ , but like in the same location. I kind of liked it. Actually, I really liked it.

I wasn't ready for Santana to leave yet, so I suggested maybe watching the second Harry Potter movie. She grinned and agreed.

I went to my room and grabbed the movie. When I came back out to the living room, Santana was already on the couch. Her shoes were kicked off of her feet and were lying on the floor next to the couch. Lady and Lance were both receiving pets from her, and she was cooing softly at them. I couldn't hear what she was saying, but I still thought it was cute.

I set the movie up and headed over to the couch, telling the dogs to lie down. As the dogs obeyed, I saw that Santana had set two full glasses of water on the coasters on the coffee table for us. She really was incredibly thoughtful.

We both got comfortable and focused on the exploits of Harry, Ron, and Hermione in their second year at Hogwarts. I was pretty tired, but I knew I wouldn't fall asleep while I was watching the movie. I kicked my own shoes off and lay back and stretched my legs a little toward Santana so I could relax though.

Santana turned toward me and smiled. She propped her own feet up on the coffee table and pulled my feet toward her to rest on her lap so I could stretch out fully. I couldn't believe that she was comfortable with having part of my body just lying on her, even if it was my feet. It made my body tingle a little to have that contact with her, especially since she rested her left hand on my leg.

My focus was torn between the feeling of Santana's hand on my leg and the movie. I could have sworn I felt Santana's thumb moving against my shin a couple of times, but every time I surreptitiously glanced over, I didn't even see a twitch of her hand.

Once the movie was over, I knew Santana needed to leave. There was no excuse for her to stay over again tonight. She hadn't been drinking and it wasn't even too late for her to be driving home. As much as I hated it, she was going to go home.

"So I have some things to do tomorrow for work, so I should probably go home and get some rest," Santana told me, confirming my suspicions.

"Okay, sure," I told her, hoping the disappointment wasn't evident in my voice.

She slipped her shoes on and we headed toward the front door. She put her jacket on and grabbed her purse off of the hook before turning back to me.

"I've had a lot of fun," she said, giving me a bright smile. Her eyes were sparkling and my heart started beating a little faster.

I grinned back at her, unable to contain my joy at the time we spent together for the past day. "Me too," I replied. "Let me know when you get home so I know you made it safely."

She nodded as she gave a little chuckle. "I will," she promised. "Make sure you take your pill tonight." I rolled my eyes but nodded. "I will talk to you tomorrow."

"Okay," I said, nodding again. I felt kind of ridiculous, standing here grinning like an idiot and just nodding.

Santana stepped toward me and pulled me into a hug. I wrapped my arms around her, reveling in the feel of her in my arms again. Now I really didn't want her to go, but I knew I had to stop these feelings soon. Otherwise I was going to ruin our friendship.

"Goodnight Tana," I said into her hair.

"Goodnight Britt," she said, giving me a final squeeze before she pulled back.

I let her out the door and watched her until she got to her car. She gave me a final wave as she got in and closed her door. I didn't close my front door until she had backed out of the driveway and started driving down the street. Santana had only just left, so why did I miss her already?

 **A/N: So you finally found out what the pills were for. I don't think any of you were thinking it was anything quite like that, but I could be wrong. Just so you know, myasthenia gravis is a real disease, though it is considered rare. I tried to give a basic explanation in the story without getting too clinical or boring. If anyone is interested in learning more, I encourage you to check out the Myasthenia Gravis Foundation of America's website at . Or you can ask me (through review/message/tumblr ask) and I will do my best to answer your questions. Invisible illnesses are close to my heart, so I like to spread awareness that sometimes people may look okay to you but they are struggling with just being able to make it through the day sometimes.**

 **With that revelation Brittany and Santana are becoming really close. Brittany has let Santana in on a lot of her secrets, so maybe it is Santana's turn here soon?**

 **I had to laugh about the guest reviewer who is upset that Brittany and Santana aren't like their characters from the show. This is an AU story, meaning that this isn't Glee! I stated in my first note at the beginning of the story that they were going to be very different (since they were mostly my own characters) but that they would have some characteristics and events from the show as part of their lives. Their backgrounds and their families are not like they were on the show, so they aren't going to be the same people that they were at all. A lot of authors may give them the same kind of personalities, but a lot of authors branch out. The whole point (in my opinion) is to show that, despite different circumstances and settings and personalities, these girls will always belong together. If you want canon Brittana, then read a canon story. Having said that, I hope you continue to read this story. You may just end up enjoying it!**

 **So what do you guys think? Do you think Brittany will be any sort of successful at quashing how she feels about Santana? Do you think Santana is going to have to hit Brittany over the head to make it obvious how she feels? I mean, I thought it was pretty clear when she wanted to know Brittany's pill schedule so she could make sure she took them on time, but that's just me ;) Do you think Brittany's disease will impact Santana's feelings for her in the long run or cause any sort of problems for them?**


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Santana kept her word and texted me when she arrived home. She also asked if I remembered to take my medicine. Her concern made me grin, even if I could tell it was going to get old after awhile if she kept up like this.

I had been a little worried that I wouldn't be able to sleep very well after Santana left. But after we texted back and forth for a couple of minutes, we wished each other goodnight and I fell asleep rather quickly. When I woke up, I did so with a smile as thoughts of Santana immediately entered my brain.

Once I actually got out of bed for the day, I was a little sad since I wasn't going to see her today. I tried to put it out of my mind, but it was impossible. It was as if my entire existence consisted of Santana now. I had never felt like this about anyone before. I didn't exactly know what was going on, but I hadn't even felt like this about Sam. That thought made me feel a little guilty, but I wasn't quite sure what these feelings for Santana were, so I couldn't necessarily say that I _should_ be feeling guilty about it.

Santana ended up calling me around lunchtime. I was a little surprised, since we had pretty much always conversed through texts before when we weren't around each other. But I definitely wasn't going to complain, since I loved hearing her voice. In fact, I couldn't stop the smile that spread over my face and stayed there for the whole thirty-two minutes that we talked.

She told me that she wished she didn't have to do stuff for work, otherwise we could have done something together again today. She also us mentioned getting together with Gabe for dinner this week. Her mention of her brother reminded me that I needed to thank him for getting me the signed t-shirt.

After we hung up, I sent a text to Gabe thanking him for the shirt. I was surprised when he texted back quickly. He, too, mentioned me, Santana, and him all having dinner sometime this week. I told him that sounded great, and it did. I was glad that I was getting to develop friendships with a few people now.

Gus could tell that I was in a good mood Monday morning when I arrived at work. We talked a little bit about how the dinner went on Friday. He gave me a big grin when I told him that Santana spent the night and hung out with me all day Saturday. He just let me gush to him, and I was happy that I had someone that I could talk to like this again. Particularly someone that I could talk to about Santana, since I didn't exactly have anyone that I could trust with my thoughts and feelings about her.

I could probably talk to Gabe, but I didn't want him to go back and tell Santana anything I told him. I was afraid that if she found out how much I was crushing on her that she would get uncomfortable around me. And I felt that I would die if that happened.

Gabe's schedule was clear on Wednesday, so we all met at a restaurant at Easton. The first thing Santana did when she saw me was ask if I had taken my 5pm pill since it was already after 6 o'clock. I reassured her that I had. She had been checking up on me the past few days via text message to make sure that I was following my pill schedule. I tried giving her a hard time about it and joked that she was acting like my mom, but she wouldn't even consider backing off.

I was mostly just happy to see her again. I wanted to get close to her so that our bodies could touch, much like on the couch Saturday night. But I kept my distance. Just being in the same room with her again was giving me little flutters in my tummy.

I was also happy to see Gabe again, since it had been a couple of weeks since I had actually been able to see him in person. He gave me a big hug when he arrived and immediately began chatting with me and asking how I had been. We caught up for awhile, and he told Santana and I all about his games. I felt kind of bad since I hadn't made an effort to watch the games. In my defense, my mind was more concentrated on the other Lopez.

Dinner was really fun. There was a lot of laughing and talking and I felt content and excited at the same time. Santana mentioned us all going out dancing, and Gabe said that he was free Friday night. So we made plans to get together again in a couple of days and go out to a club Gabe said was really good.

Of course I hated to separate from Santana again, but we hugged and said our goodbyes. I texted Santana once I got home and we chatted for a little bit before bed. Our pattern continued over the next couple of days, and soon it was time for me to get ready to go over to Santana's to prepare to go out dancing.

Santana had invited me over to dinner at her apartment before we went out to the club, so that was where I was headed. She had also suggested I spend the night since we wouldn't be getting back until late. So I went ahead and boarded the dogs at my vet's office for the night with the plans of picking them up Saturday morning.

I decided to go ahead and get ready for our night out before going to Santana's and was wearing a short, tight dark blue dress. My hair was loose and straight down my back, and I had applied a little bit heavier make-up than normal. I completed the outfit with a pair of heels. I had to wear my coat over to Santana's since it was still March and still not very warm.

Santana opened her door after I knocked, an answering smile to my own on her face. Her eyes widened a little once I removed my coat.

"Damn Britt!" Santana exclaimed. "You look hot!"

I blushed as my heart pounded a little at her words. I loved that she told me that I looked good. I wanted to look good for her.

"Thanks," I said, giving her a shy smile.

"Sorry I'm not all dressed up yet," she apologized. "I figured I would just get ready after we ate."

I shrugged and shook my head a little, indicating that it was okay that she was still in jeans and a blouse. She still looked beautiful. She could probably wear a garbage bag and still look beautiful.

She told me to put my bags on the couch and then led me into the kitchen after I had done so. Dinner smelled delicious. She had made some roasted chicken breasts with potatoes and green beans.

"What do you want to drink?" Santana asked, pulling a glass out of the cupboard. "I have water, juice, milk… I think I have some Coke here, too."

"Water's perfect," I told her.

Santana filled up my glass with ice water and handed it to me. "I hope you don't mind if I have some wine," she said, a little bashful. "We aren't driving tonight, so I figured it would be okay if I had a glass or two with dinner if you didn't care."

"San, you don't have to ask me," I told her sincerely, making sure to catch her eye so she could see that I meant it. "If we were driving anywhere then I would just make sure that I drove. I am perfectly fine with you drinking."

She gave me a relieved smile before she poured herself a glass of white wine. She put her glass on the table in the dining area, which was already set up for dinner. She indicated that I should sit down and she went back to the counter to get the food and brought it to the table.

"Sorry dinner isn't anything too fancy," Santana said as she sat down.

"I'm sure it will be delicious, San. And unless you were going to cook me some secret family recipe or something then I wouldn't expect anything too fancy," I teased with a smile.

Santana gave me a sad smile. "I don't have too many of those."

Shit, now I had made her sad without meaning to. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

Santana shook her head dismissively. "No, you didn't," she told me reassuringly. "I just didn't get to learn a lot of that kind of stuff from my parents. They died in a plane crash when I was 14."

My heart sunk with sadness at Santana having to go through that at such a young age. I reached across the table and grabbed her hand comfortingly. "Santana," I said, trying to convey all of the understanding I felt for her pain through just one word.

I could say that I was sorry, but I knew that it wouldn't actually provide any sort of comfort. Santana would know that I empathized with her loss. I couldn't understand what it was like to lose my parents, but I could understand what it was like to lose one of the most important people in my life, whom I loved dearly. I hoped Santana could get what I meant.

She looked at me with sadness swirling in her eyes, but she looked less tense than she had when she revealed her loss. I understood now why she had that invisible weight on her shoulders that only seemed to disappear when she was asleep. She squeezed my hand, and I knew that she understood that I was here for her.

"My abuela- my dad's mom- ended up moving out to Connecticut and taking care of Gabe and me," Santana continued, a hint of a smile coming over her lips. "She is the one who taught me some of the family recipes."

I smiled softly back at her. "She sounds pretty great," I told her quietly.

Santana nodded, the ghost of a smile fading. "She was." My heart sunk again. Poor Santana had gone through so much loss. "She died of a stroke right after Gabe was drafted. I was 20 then. Even though she didn't fully accept my sexuality, she still loved me and wanted me to be happy," Santana told me, a tear escaping her eye to trail slowly down her cheek.

God, I couldn't stand to see her cry. I quickly got out of my chair and moved over to her, pulling her into a tight hug. Santana clung to me and I rubbed her back soothingly. She took several deep breaths before she pulled back a little. I leaned back and looked into her face. There were no more tears, but just the faint track of the one tear that had fallen. I took my thumb and rubbed it away gently. I wanted to lighten the mood. I didn't want Santana to be sad, I couldn't handle it.

"Are we ever going to get through a dinner together without some major revelation about ourselves?" I asked jokingly.

Santana chuckled and my mood brightened instantly at her smile.

"I sure hope so," she replied, her voice just a little teasing.

I moved back into my seat and we started to dish up our food. Dinner was really good, and I paid my compliments to Santana profusely. We kept our discussion to lighter topics and mostly talked about the night ahead.

Gabe was supposed to meet us here and we would take a cab over to the club. It wasn't too far away, but, with the cold weather, neither of us wanted to walk. After we finished eating, we cleaned up the dishes and Santana went to get ready. I took my overnight stuff into the guest bedroom and then went back into the living room to wait on her.

I had been waiting for about ten minutes when a knock sounded at the door. I went ahead and opened it and greeted Gabe.

"Wow Brittany," he said, gaze raking over my outfit. "You look amazing!"

I blushed but smiled at the compliment. "Thanks," I said. "You don't look so bad yourself."

He was wearing black slacks and a dark blue striped dress shirt that had the top few buttons undone. I figured Santana and Gabe wouldn't be going to a dingy hole in the wall, and Gabe's outfit definitely confirmed it. He looked pretty hot.

We made our way into the living room, talking about how we were looking forward to dancing tonight and waited on Santana. We didn't have to wait too much longer. Santana came in after we had been sitting there for less than ten minutes, and my heart about stopped. She was wearing a very tight, very short, low cut black dress with super high heels. Her hair fell in curls down her back, she had done her make-up a little more drastically than usual, accentuated by her dark red lipstick. She looked fucking sexy and beautiful and gorgeous and hot and amazing and about any other descriptive term to explain the drool about to come out of my mouth.

I was speechless. I could feel the flush cover my face and go up to my ears and down my neck. I was definitely turned on by her, and I felt like everyone in the world would be able to tell. Gabe cleared his throat a little and I turned to see that he had a little smirk on his face as he looked at me. My embarrassment grew, and I stood up quickly.

"Are we ready to go?" I asked awkwardly, ready to run out of the room.

Santana gave a low laugh. "Calm down, Britt," she said, amused. "Let me finish my other glass of wine first while Gabe calls us a cab."

"Okay, sure," I said, my voice a little higher than usual. "Let me just go to the bathroom first."

I didn't wait for a reply as I rushed out of the room and into the bathroom. I took a deep breath and tried to calm down once I shut the door behind me. I needed to get my head on straight. Santana was just my friend. Sure, she was insanely attractive and made my heart do funny things and my panties damp, but she could only be my friend.

I started to relax, and decided to go ahead and pee since I was already in here. I finished and washed my hands and went back out into the living room where Santana and her brother were now sitting on the couch. Santana took the last sip of her wine as I came in and sat down on the other couch.

"The cab should be here in a couple of minutes," Gabe said, his face friendly but a mischievous glint in his eyes. I didn't know how much he suspected about my feelings, but I wasn't going to give him any help if I could avoid it.

I just nodded to him in response. Finally, after what seemed like hours, we headed out to the cab that had pulled up out front of Santana's building. We piled in and were soon off. After a short drive, we arrived at the club. The line outside was long, which wasn't surprising because it looked like a really nice place. The music could be heard from outside, the bass vibrating in the air. I couldn't wait to get in and dance. It had been so long since I had let go and just moved.

Although I shouldn't have been, I was a little surprised when Gabe led us to the doorman and we were immediately let in when he gave his name. We made our way into the crowded club and toward the bar. Gabe and Santana both took shots while I anxiously waited for them to be ready to go out on the dance floor.

Santana grinned at me, sensing my impatience. "You ready to dance Britt?" I nodded enthusiastically. She grabbed my hand and started to lead me to the dance floor. "Then let's go!"

I grinned widely and followed willingly. We got out onto the floor and I immediately started to move instinctually to the beat. It had been a really long time since I had danced like this, but it all came back to me quickly. Naturally I couldn't dance the way I used to due to my myasthenia gravis, but I could still dance as long as I took it a little easy.

Santana fell into an easy rhythm with me, our bodies moving together as if they had done this for years. Santana was a good dancer, and I smiled at how well we could dance with each other. I could see the smile on Santana's face as her eyes moved up and down my body, watching my movements.

"You're a really amazing dancer," she yelled over the music.

"Thanks," I yelled back. "You're pretty good yourself."

We continued to move with each other, getting a little closer as we danced. I desperately wanted to touch her, but I wasn't sure it would be okay. So I kept my hands to myself, settling for the occasional brush of our bodies against each other.

Santana ended up turning around, moving back into me so we could get closer. I ended up putting my hand on her hip then, pulling her ass into me a little. The feeling of her moving against me like that sent arousal pooling into my core.

Then I felt hands on my hips and I looked over my shoulder to find Gabe behind me, moving with my body. I realized how close Santana and I had gotten, and I kind of panicked a little. I was afraid she would find out how turned on I was by dancing with her, so I backed away from her a little and leaned back into Gabe.

Santana turned around as I pulled away from her and saw that I was dancing closely with her brother. An unreadable expression crossed her face, and for some reason it made my chest tighten in a bad way. She seemed to shake it off and danced with us for a little longer. Then she mouthed that she was going to go get another drink and I nodded that I understood.

Santana went back to the bar and I danced a few more songs with Gabe. It was fun dancing with him, but I missed dancing with Santana. I didn't know why Santana hadn't rejoined us, and I wanted to go find her. Plus I was starting to get a little tired. So I let Gabe know that I was going to take a break and I headed toward the bar.

I found Santana there, nursing a drink. I touched her shoulder to let her know I was there as I came up to her side. I smiled at her and she smiled back, though it didn't quite reach her eyes.

"Having fun?" Santana asked.

I nodded. "This was a great idea," I said enthusiastically. "But how come you didn't come back? I wanted to dance with you."

She shrugged a little, although her smile brightened. "You looked like you were having fun with Gabe."

"But I was having fun with you, too," I told her honestly.

"I was too," she replied. Then she got a concerned look on her face. "Are you tired? Did you need to take your last pill?"

I bit my lip on a smile at her concern. "I am a little tired, but I probably won't take my pill quite yet," I said. "I am just gonna rest for a little bit and get some water."

She nodded and immediately motioned for the bartender. She requested a water for me and I thanked the bartender when she brought it to me. Gabe joined us a minute later and we all rested for a few minutes and drank our respective beverages.

Santana took me back out on the dance floor a little while later, but only after making sure that I was feeling more rested. We danced for a few songs, but we didn't get quite as close as we had before unfortunately. Gabe joined us again, and I tried to split my time between the two so they weren't neglected. But it seemed like Santana withdrew a little bit more every time I concentrated on dancing with Gabe.

She went back to the bar again and I frowned but didn't follow. Gabe started grinding up on some other girl and I just decided to keep dancing by myself. I started dancing a little harder, attempting to pull off some moves I hadn't done in years. I felt the need to see what I could do now. I was pleased to see that I could still do a lot, but it wore me out. Combined with the lateness of the hour, I knew I was going to have to go take my pill.

I stopped dancing and was surprised to see a little open circle of people around me that had been watching me and cheering me on. I had been so lost in my dancing that I hadn't even realized that I had an audience. Gabe was grinning at me and whooping as he clapped his hands. I blushed and rolled my eyes as I headed over to the bar to get some water so I could take my pill.

I immediately saw Santana's eyes watching me as I walked toward her. The look in her eyes made my heart pound and my palms sweat. At least the sweat I had worked up dancing could explain away the flush I had on my skin that was darkening as I approached Santana, her eyes never leaving mine.

"I didn't know you could do that," she said as I reached her, her voice low. Apparently she had been able to see me dancing from the bar. The thought pleased me.

"I hadn't done anything like that in a long time," I confessed. "To be honest, it wore me out a bit."

Her eyes became worried and she immediately moved from her stool so I could sit down. I smiled gratefully at her, but frowned as I noticed her stumble a little bit as she got up.

"Do you need to take your pill?" Santana asked, and I noticed that her voice was a little slurred.

"Yeah, I probably should," I said as I nodded.

I frowned a little more as she kind of had a mini panic. She ran off to get my pill out of my bag and she was a little unsteady. I got the bartender to get me some more water and had it in hand by the time Santana came back with my pill container. I swallowed my dose and relaxed against the bar, hoping that I hadn't worked my muscles too hard to the point where they wouldn't work very well.

I heard sniffling and turned to see Santana's eyes tearing up.

"San? What's the matter?" I asked, concerned.

"I'm sorry, Britt," she said, her voice sad. "I should have kept a better eye on you so you didn't get so tired. I didn't want you to get weak. I looked it up online and saw that you shouldn't overwork yourself like that and I let you do it anyways because you looked like you were having so much fun and you looked really good and I'm sorry."

"I'm fine Tana, I promise," I told her. "I know my body and I know I am going to be fine, okay?"

She nodded but still sniffled. I wasn't really surprised that she had looked up myasthenia gravis online. Santana was the type of person who liked to know everything she could about a subject, and she would research the hell out of it if she needed to.

"Do you want to date my brother?" My eyes widened in shock at the blurted question. I looked at Santana questioningly and I saw her face scrunch up again with tears. What the fuck was going on?

"What?! No!" I exclaimed. "I mean, he is cute and really nice and all, but I am not interested in him like that."

"I'm sorry," she apologized again, and I just shook my head as she cried more. "Y-you were j-just dancing a lot w-with him, a-and I d-didn't know if you l-liked him like that. He's my b-brother, but h-he's a player and I didn't w-want you to get hurt."

I laughed a little before I stopped quickly as Santana's tears worsened. I honestly had no clue what was going on with her, but she had obviously had too much to drink. I pulled her into a hug, running my hand soothingly on her back. I figured we should probably get out of here soon.

"I'm a little tired," I said. It wasn't a lie, but I wasn't that tired. "Do you think we can go home?"

Santana nodded against my shoulder. "Of course," she mumbled. "I can't let you get too weak. I need to get you in bed."

My eyes closed involuntarily as arousal shot through me at the thought of Santana getting me in bed. Obviously she hadn't meant it like that, but I couldn't help my brain thinking what it wanted to. I pulled back to get some space between our bodies so I could think straight again.

"Do you think you can get us a cab while I go tell Gabe we're gonna go?" I asked her. She nodded. "Okay. I'll go tell him and you get our stuff and I will meet you out front."

We separated and I went back to the dance floor to find Gabe. He was still dancing with the girl from earlier, and I figured he had found someone to take home for the night. I tapped his shoulder and he turned and immediately tried to pull me into a dance with him. I shook my head at him and held his hands away from me.

"Santana's a little drunk and I'm tired, so we're gonna go," I yelled over the music.

He looked a little concerned. "Has she been crying?" I nodded. "Shit. She does that sometimes when she gets drunk. Do you think you can handle it?"

"Yeah, we should be fine. I think we both just need to get some sleep," I told him.

"Are you okay?" Gabe asked, his brow furrowed with worry.

"I'm fine, just overworked myself a little bit," I reassured him.

He nodded to me and gave me a hug goodbye. He turned back to his hook up for the night and I threaded my way back through the crowd. I got outside and saw Santana waiting for me with our bags. She wasn't crying anymore, but she didn't seem to be happy either. I thankfully saw a cab pull up a few seconds later. I was grateful to be heading back, even though it was just before midnight.

I helped Santana into the cab and she leaned her head against the window and stared outside the whole ride back. I helped her out of the cab and up to her apartment. It was kind of hard since I was a little weak and she was leaning against me pretty heavily, but we made it. I got her into her apartment and to her bedroom door where she leaned against the frame.

Santana turned to look at me, her eyes searching mine as she brought her hand up to tuck my hair behind my ear. Instead of removing her hand, she brought it down to cup my cheek. I couldn't read her emotions, but her face looked serious. The look in her eyes made my heart flutter a little more than usual and my breath catch, but I wasn't sure what I was seeing. My brow furrowed a little as I tried to figure out what was going on in her pretty little head. I must have done something wrong, however, because Santana's face closed up and she stood up straight as she pulled her hand away from my cheek.

"Goodnight Britt," she whispered.

"Goodnight," I replied quietly.

Santana turned and went into her bedroom, closing the door softly behind her. I stood there for a moment, confused. I had no idea what had gone on with Santana tonight. I thought we had been having fun, and then she went and got drunk to the point where she started bawling and avoided dancing with me anymore. And then she just gave me that weird look. Santana had turned into a puzzle for me tonight. I shook myself out of my thoughts and headed to the spare bedroom to get ready for bed.

I just hoped that tonight didn't cause any awkwardness between us. As much as my feelings for Santana were growing, I didn't want to ruin our friendship. So I would do whatever I could to ensure that I didn't lose her. Because, even after only knowing her for a couple of weeks, I honestly didn't know how I could deal with not having her in my life.

 **A/N: Oh, we were so close weren't we? Seems like Santana may be having a bit harder of a time trying to hide how she feels about Brittany. How much longer will she be able to hold out? How much longer will Brittany have no idea what is going on with Santana? At least Santana is starting to open up a bit more and let her in about her past since Brittany had already told her so much. Santana losing her family explains why she and her brother are so close too.**

 **What do you think? Is it going okay so far? Who do you think will cave first? And how much longer do you think they can hold out?**

 **I am looking forward to some delicious food tomorrow for Thanksgiving. To all of my readers celebrating tomorrow, have a Happy Thanksgiving!**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

I had been afraid that the night would cause some awkwardness the next morning. When I got up around 9 o'clock I was surprised to see Santana already sitting at the counter in her kitchen with a cup of coffee. She acted like she either didn't remember anything strange about the night before, or she was pretending that nothing unusual happened. I just went along with it, not wanting to create any strain between us.

Santana had some muffins from Kyle's bakery for us to have for breakfast. They were delicious, as everything from his bakery had been so far. Santana seemed a little hungover, but not too worse for wear. We chatted for a bit as we both woke up a bit more after a late night. I couldn't stay too long at her place, however, because I needed to go pick up my dogs from the kennel before they closed.

I reluctantly left with the promise to talk to her later and went home. We didn't see each other for the rest of the weekend, but ended up texting a lot and talking on the phone. Monday morning saw me back at work with a more dour mood than the previous week. I had missed seeing Santana for a couple of days, and I still had no clue what was going on with her breakdown Friday night.

Gus could tell something was a little wrong, but I actually didn't want to talk about it for some reason. I felt like I should be able to figure out my best friend on my own instead of relying on someone else to do it. I wouldn't be much of a best friend if I couldn't. But I was never the best at reading people except for Sam, and that had only come after years of being together.

Over the next couple of weeks Santana and I fell into a kind of routine. We would send each other little texts when we would get the chance at work, and we would always talk in the evenings when we were settling in for the night. We met for dinner a couple of times a week, usually eating at a restaurant in Columbus on a workday and Santana coming for dinner Friday night at my house. We would often get together on Saturday as well, either to go shopping or to watch a movie or something together. We had gotten together with Gabe a couple more times, but hadn't gone out like we had when we went dancing.

Once mid-April came around I had become used to seeing Santana regularly. She still gave me the tingles and made my heart pound, but I was learning to control myself a bit better. I couldn't stop my feelings from developing further, but I had learned how to hide them a bit better. At least I thought I had.

Santana and I were supposed to meet for dinner on a Wednesday and I had texted her in the morning telling her I was looking forward to seeing her. She usually was good about texting me back sometime in the morning, but when I hadn't heard from her by lunchtime I got a little worried. She had said she had been really tired last night, and I was concerned she may not have been feeling well. Santana had been working really hard lately, and I didn't want her to get sick.

I decided to call her to check on her. If she was at work and was busy, then she would just not pick up and I could leave her a voicemail. I dialed and held my breath as I waited.

"Brittany?" Santana's normally raspy voice sounded groggy and hoarse.

"San, are you okay?" I asked, immediately concerned as it was pretty clear that Santana was ill.

"No," she groaned. "I'm fucking sick and I feel miserable."

"Aw, poor Tana! Please tell me you are at least home and resting," I said kindly.

"Yeah," she croaked. "I haven't left my bed."

"Good," I told her. "Do you need anything? Medicine? Soup? Anything?"

"Britt, don't worry about me," she said. "It's just a nasty cold."

"I'm coming over," I said with finality.

"I don't want you getting sick," Santana protested. "It isn't good for your myasthenia gravis."

"San, I rarely get sick," I explained. "And even if I did get sick, I would survive."

"You better not come over Brittany," Santana commanded, immediately following it with a coughing fit.

"I'm already leaving," I told her, grabbing my things and getting ready to walk out the door.

"Brittany Pierce Evans! Do NOT-"

"Sorry San! I can't hear you!" I broke in and hung up my phone. I ignored the incoming stream of texts that I knew was Santana berating me. I went to my boss and explained that I was taking a few hours off, and he agreed without any complaint. I rarely took time off, so it was never an issue when I did ask for it.

I headed to the store to pick up what I needed. I got the ingredients I needed to make some hearty chicken and rice soup. I also picked up some decongestant, cold medicine, nasal spray, cough drops, menthol rub, crackers, and ginger ale. I took my haul back to my car and drove over to Santana's apartment.

I knew she was going to be pissed, but I at least hoped she would open the door for me. If she didn't, I would have to resort to calling Gabe and hope that he wasn't out of town for a game. I carried my supplies up to her door and knocked loudly. It wasn't long before Santana pulled the door open.

She looked angry, but it wasn't scary considering how miserable she looked. She was bundled up in loose sweats and an overlarge Ohio State hoodie, her dark locks pulled up into a very messy bun. She had several loose tendrils falling around her flushed face. Her eyelids were droopy and she was hunched over herself a little. Her nose was red and irritated from the tissues I knew she was going through. I berated myself internally for not thinking to pick more up. Oh well, I could go get some more later.

"I told you not to come," she croaked but letting me through the door.

I just shrugged as I walked past her with my bags and carried everything into the kitchen. "What medicine have you taken so far?" I asked instead.

"I just drank some tea this morning," she grumbled. "It was all I had and I didn't feel good enough to go out."

"Okay," I said as I dug through one of the bags. I pulled out the cold medicine and opened the box. "Here, take these now and we can use some of the other stuff later if you want it."

Santana took the pills from me and I opened a ginger ale for her. She swallowed the pills and I could see the wince on her face from the pain of swallowing. "Thanks," she mumbled. "But you better not get sick or I'm going to be pissed at you."

I grinned at her and set about pulling out the pots and pans I would need to make my soup. "Go get back in bed and I will bring you a bowl of soup when it's ready," I told her.

"You really don't need to go through all this trouble," she protested again. "I think I have a can of soup somewhere."

I shook my head at her. "A can of soup isn't good enough," I said. "Now go lay down while I make this."

I could hear her grumbling under her breath as she walked out of the kitchen with her ginger ale. I chuckled to myself and started cooking. I cut up the chicken and put it in a pan to cook. Meanwhile, I started to boil some water to cook the rice. Once the chicken was cooked through, I removed it from the burner and put on a larger pot to put the broth, celery, and carrots in to boil. I added the rest of the ingredients once the rice had finished cooking and let it simmer to warm everything all of the way through.

Once it was finished I dished out a bowl for Santana. I let it sit for a couple of minutes to cool as I got everything else ready. I put another can of ginger ale into the bag with all of the medicine and added a package of crackers to it. I looped the bag over my wrist and grabbed the bowl of soup, a dish towel, and a spoon and headed to Santana's bedroom.

I noticed as I entered that Santana had fallen asleep. I hesitated to wake her, but I knew she needed to eat something. I set the soup down on her nightstand with the towel and put the bag of medicine on the bed. I sat down on the edge of her bed and she didn't even stir. I took a moment to just look at her. Even when she was sick, she still looked beautiful.

I gently brushed some hair off of her forehead. "San," I said quietly. "Come on, you need to wake up."

Santana started to stir under my hand. I panicked a little, wondering if she would think it was weird that I was touching her face, so I pulled my hand away and put it on her shoulder instead. Santana's eyes blinked open and she looked at me groggily.

"Britt?" Santana asked, a little confused. Then she realized how close I was and her eyes widened. "You shouldn't be this close! I don't want to get you sick!"

I chuckled at her panic. "Tana, I will be fine," I promised. "I just needed to wake you up so you can eat."

Her face scrunched up in distaste. "I'm not really hungry," she protested.

"I know, but you really need to eat a little bit," I told her. "For me?"

I threw in a little pout for good measure, and her face softened. She nodded to me and I helped her to sit up. She rested her back on her pillows, propped up against her headboard. I laid the towel down over her chest and handed her the bowl carefully.

"It is probably still a little bit hot," I warned her. "Did you want some crackers?"

She nodded slightly again, and I reached over to the side to grab the bag I had brought in. I pulled out the can of ginger ale and the package of crackers. I opened the crackers and set them next to her so she could get what she wanted out of them. I checked the can of ginger ale she had left on the nightstand and noticed that she had drank it all. I was glad she had finished it because she was going to need the fluids. I opened the other can and set it on the nightstand for her.

Santana spooned out some soup and blew on it after I had finished setting everything up for her. She carefully put it into her mouth. "This is delicious," she praised after she had swallowed.

I gave her a pleased smile and stood up, taking the bag of medicine with me. Santana continued to slowly eat the soup and the occasional cracker while I pulled out the goodies from the bag and set them on the bed.

"So we got some decongestant, some nasal spray, some cough drops, some menthol chest rub, and of course the medicine you took earlier which you can take again in a few hours," I told her as I set everything out. "What do you think you will want to use?"

"Definitely the cough drops," she said. "Probably the chest rub. Honestly, probably all of it."

I smiled at her admission. "I'm glad I got it all then," I told her, happy with myself.

She shot me a grateful smile. "I really appreciate it, Brittany," she said. "No one's taken care of me like this when I've been sick in a long time."

I looked at her with surprise. Surely one of her girlfriends would have been around when she was sick, right? "Not even a girlfriend or anything?"

Her face hardened a little and she looked down at the bowl. "No. My college girlfriends were more of hook ups. And then Courtney probably would have taken the opportunity to meet one of her lovers if I was sick," she spat.

My heart sunk at her confession. No wonder why she didn't want to see her ex the other day. It was more than just the typical discomfort around a former lover. I hated that Santana had to go through something like that. I honestly couldn't understand how in the hell anyone could have wanted someone else if they had Santana.

"Well, they just suck then," I told her, a hint of anger in my voice at the thought of no one taking care of this amazing woman when she needed it. "I will be here to help you whenever you need it, Santana."

She looked at me searchingly for a moment, a hint of a smile on her lips. "I bet Sam was always there to take care of you when you needed it," she said.

There was a note of envy in her voice which I couldn't understand. I frowned a little, confused by her. "Sam was great about things like that," I told her honestly. "But my relationship wasn't perfect."

Santana gave me an unbelieving look. "Sure," she said scornfully, "the high school sweethearts who got married young and stuck together through hard times and took care of each other when you were sick wasn't perfect."

I sat back down on the bed and looked down at my hands in my lap. "He cheated on me twice," I confessed.

Santana coughed as she choked a little on her soup. My head shot up toward her in concern. She was struggling to keep the soup from spilling so I grabbed the bowl from her and put it on the nightstand.

"What the fuck do you mean he cheated on you?" Santana bit out once she recovered. Her face was scrunched up in anger and disbelief.

I shrugged a little in deflection. I had never told anyone that before. Not a single person. I don't know why I felt that I had to tell Santana, but I just had the feeling that I needed to let her know that my relationship with Sam wasn't something that should be put up on a pedestal.

"Brittany," she said softly this time. Santana's hand rested on my arm and I gave her a sad smile.

"The first time was after I told him that I was going to go to MIT," I explained reluctantly. "He was upset at the thought of being separated and he went out to a party without me and got drunk. He slept with a girl there and then told me immediately the next morning what had happened."

Santana frowned but rubbed her hand soothingly on my arm. "He felt so bad about it and he apologized so many times," I continued. "I told him that I needed some time apart from him to think and he agreed. He told me that he still loved me and wanted to be with me and that he would wait for me. He promised that he would go to Massachusetts with me if we got back together."

"Did he say why he did it though?" Santana asked.

"He said that he thought he was going to lose me because he wasn't going to be able to go to college with me," I told her. "He was afraid that I would go away and he would be left behind, and when he got drunk some girl was all over him and he just stopped thinking."

Santana scowled at that. "That isn't an excuse," she said angrily.

"I know that," I said. "But I was young and terrified about going off to a different state all on my own for school. He recommitted himself to me and did so many things to show me that he still loved me. When I told him that I wanted to get back together, he was so happy. He made plans to move out to Massachusetts and get a job so we could still be together. Knowing that I would have him there with me made me feel so much better about going to MIT. And I was afraid I would never meet someone else who would love me like he did and I would be alone. So when he proposed that summer, I said yes."

"So what about the other time?" Santana asked, her voice still strained with anger.

"The second time was after we had been married for a few years," I told her. "I was finishing up my last year at school and he was working two jobs at the time. We barely saw each other because we were so busy and stressed. I was stressed with trying to get all of my schoolwork done and he was stressed because he was working so much to try to make ends meet for us. He was always such a hard worker, but it started to get to him that he had to do everything. I didn't have the energy to go to school all day and then work on top of it with my myasthenia gravis. We started to fight a little more, and he went out one night with some of his friends to a bar."

I saw Santana roll her eyes as she predicted exactly what was coming. "Let me guess… he got drunk again?"

I laughed dryly at her correct guess. "Yep. He got drunk and some girl started hitting on him. He told her repeatedly that he was married, but she didn't give up. He was all up in his head again about how things weren't great between us. We hadn't had sex in awhile with all of the strain between us, and this girl was all over him. So he gave in," I confessed.

Santana let out a disgusted sound and I couldn't help but smile at her. I liked that she was so offended on my behalf. It meant that she cared about me. Even if it might not be in the way I wanted her to, she still cared.

"He came home in the middle of the night and woke me up to tell me what happened," I said. "I was so messed up in my own head with all of our problems and I was scared that he was going to leave me alone, so I started bawling. Then I punched him."

"Good for you!" Santana broke in enthusiastically.

I laughed. "Well, I didn't have a lot of strength so it didn't even leave a bruise," I said. "But I made my point. And he told me that he still loved me but he would understand if I didn't want to be with him anymore. I was so pissed at him for cheating, because there was no excuse for what he did. But I knew that things weren't great between us and it wasn't all his fault. I was still scared of not having him in my life. All of the people who we hung out with were really his friends and I was not good at meeting people, as you know."

Santana smiled a little at me at that. "So I forgave him and we worked it out," I admitted. "I told myself and him that things would be better once I finished school and got a job. He wouldn't have to work so hard and we could see each other more. And it did happen. But then you know what happened after that."

Santana's hand caressed my arm soothingly again. "I'm sorry you had to go through all of that," she said softly. "It sounds like he really did love you, despite his indiscretions."

I nodded. "He did," I revealed. I didn't want to say anymore about it now. I figured that Sam loved me more than I loved him. My fear was that Sam felt that and that was why he pulled away sometimes. I didn't want to blame myself for what he did, because it wasn't my fault. But I still felt guilty about it.

"Well at least he did love you," Santana said a little bitterly. "Courtney didn't even love me, although she said she did. I found out after two years of dating that she was cheating on me the entire time."

I grabbed her hand that was on my arm and squeezed it comfortingly. "She's a bitch, San," I told her. "She definitely never deserved you. I don't see how anyone who had a heart could ever cheat on you."

Santana smiled at me. "I don't think she had a heart, so you may be right," she laughed. "We started dating while I was in law school, and I thought she was pretty great. She was everything I thought I was looking for in a girlfriend. I thought she loved me and I thought I loved her. I caught her one day with some guy at her apartment. She had told me she was a lesbian, but that was obviously a lie. I went off on her and she got mad. She said that I wasn't good enough to satisfy her and that was why she had been seeing other people the whole time we were together."

Santana's eyes had pooled with tears and she was looking down at her lap. I hated to see her like this, especially over some stupid bitch that never deserved her. "It's her loss, Santana," I swore to her. "You are pretty fucking amazing and if she couldn't see that, then she is stupid and you are way better off without her."

Santana blinked away her tears and looked at me gratefully. "You are pretty amazing yourself, Brittany," she told me sincerely. "You make some great soup and help a friend out when she is sick without being asked. I'm glad I met you."

I smiled shyly and squeezed her hand again. "I'm glad I met you too," I said, my throat getting a little tight with emotion. I cleared my throat and the soup bowl caught my eye. "Are you still hungry?"

Santana shook her head. "I am pretty full," she said. "I could probably eat some more later, but I am pretty tired again."

She definitely looked tired. I had kept her up far longer than I should have, and I knew she needed rest. I stood up again and gathered the soup bowl and crackers.

"Make sure you drink some more ginger ale," I told her. "And here are the cough drops and the chest rub if you want to use some now."

I indicated the items as I put them all on the nightstand so she could reach them easily.

She smiled again at me, her eyelids starting to droop. "Thanks."

I nodded to her as she slid down in the bed and started to get comfortable. "You get some sleep and I will check on you in a little bit."

"Mmkay," she mumbled into the pillow, already starting to drift off.

I shut off the lamp on the nightstand and made my way back into the kitchen. I cleaned the dishes I had used and put a lid onto the soup to try to keep it warm. I would make sure she ate some more later, but for now it would just sit.

I went to the living room and decided to grab a book. I didn't want to turn the TV on and risk the noise keeping Santana awake, so I figured I could keep myself entertained with one of Santana's books. I picked The Hunger Games since I hadn't read the books yet. The movies were good, but I hadn't gotten around to the books.

I found myself getting caught up in the story, which was kind of surprising since I already knew what was going to happen. But the writing was really good and I couldn't put it down.

Santana woke up a couple hours later and came out to join me on the couch. She was carrying her ginger ale and sipping from it. She looked like she was feeling a little bit better already.

"Have you read that one before?" Santana asked, indicating the book I set down on the table.

"Not yet," I said. "It is really good. As good as the movie."

She smiled at me as she settled into the couch. She had grabbed a tissue out of the box on the coffee table and blew her nose. She was definitely stuffed up.

"You can take some more medicine soon," I told her. "Did you use the cough drops and chest rub?"

"I put some of the chest rub on," she said, and now that she said it I could faintly smell it. "I am gonna start with the cough drops after I finish my ginger ale."

"Good girl," I said with a smile. "Did you want some more crackers or anything?"

"Not yet," she said with a shake of her head.

I turned on the TV now that she was awake and we relaxed for a bit on the couch. I gave her the next dose of medicine when she was due and then ate a bowl of soup with her around dinner time. I made sure to take my own medicine, even though Santana didn't remind me. I ran out quickly to buy her some more tissues, which she was grateful for.

I stayed there until around 7 o'clock, when I put Santana back in bed with all of her medicines. She had put more menthol chest rub on and had been sucking on cough drops. I made sure she had more ginger ale nearby and then I left her bundled up under her covers to go home.

I hated to leave her, especially since she was sick. But I needed to go home and take care of my dogs. I told her that I would have my phone with me all night if she needed anything. I made her promise to call me no matter what if she needed anything.

Santana ended up texting me around 10pm to make sure I took my own pill. I could tell she was starting to feel better already now that she was starting to try to take care of me again. She wished me a good night and I was able to relax enough to sleep now that I wasn't worrying so much about her.

I was happy that I was able to take care of her when she needed it. Obviously she didn't have anyone else in her life that could or would do that for her. I liked being able to fill that role for her. I could feel my feelings for her grow stronger every day, and I wanted to take care of her like a partner should. If she would let me, I felt like I could do it for the rest of my life.

 **A/N: So we learn more about Santana's past, and Brittany's at the same time. Looks like Santana's only real serious relationship was a sham, and Courtney truly is a huge bitch. And Brittany's marriage was far from perfect.**

 **What do you guys think about Brittany leaving work to take care of Santana? Pretty sweet of her, huh? And Santana was still trying to watch out for Brittany's health even though she was miserable herself.**

 **Hope everyone had a great holiday that celebrated, and those that didn't I hope you just had a great day! I can't wait to hear what you guys think of this chapter. And just to tease you all: the next chapter is a big one :)**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Santana texted me the next morning telling me that she was feeling a lot better already thanks to my nursing. She told me, much to my relief, that she had taken the day off again to fully recover. When I talked to her on my lunch break I could tell she was feeling significantly better. I still went to check on her after work and was happy to see her looking a lot healthier and she no longer sounded hoarse and congested.

She was relieved that I indeed did not get sick. To be honest, I was a little as well. I was telling the truth when I said I didn't get sick often, but when I did, I usually got pretty ill. Thankfully I had avoided catching what Santana had and avoided her wrath at ignoring her orders to avoid her.

Our routine went back to normal over the next couple of weeks. We met for dinner as usual, and I even ate dinner at Santana's again. She cooked a dish her grandmother had taught her how to make, and the rice and beans were delicious. We went and watched Gabe play again, and he did well even though they lost. He was disappointed the team wasn't going to the playoffs this season, but we did our best to cheer him up about it.

April was coming to a close and on the last Friday of the month Santana was supposed to come to my place for dinner. I was still at work when my phone went off with a text from her.

Have to cancel on dinner. Have a late meeting tonight and won't be done til probably after 8 :(- Santana

Boo! We were going to start The Deathly Hallows tonight too- Brittany

I was disappointed and not about postponing the movie. I loved seeing Santana. And our Friday dinners had become like a tradition. We had become so comfortable with each other that we often found ourselves touching on the couch as we watched a movie. I would often find Santana's head in my lap as we watched, and I kept myself from running my fingers through her hair by resting my hand on her arm. I allowed my thumb to rub it every once in awhile, but that was it. Sometimes I would lean against her shoulder and she would rest her head against mine. The feel of her against me always sent my heart into an erratic beat, but I loved it.

I know! I would much rather be with you!- Santana

It's okay. Maybe we can do something tomorrow?- Brittany

I really hoped I could at least see her tomorrow. I hadn't gone a weekend without seeing her since right after we met over a month and a half ago.

You can count on it! I'll text you later- Santana

Okay. Enjoy your meeting- Brittany

Yeah right :(- Santana

I went home disappointed. I decided to eat some leftovers instead of making the stir fry I had planned on. The dogs even seemed disappointed, as if they knew what day it was and had been expecting Santana to come with pets and treats.

I waited on Santana to text. I ended up watching Breakfast at Tiffany's in bed while I waited. She finally texted me after 10 o'clock. She was pissed that the people she had gone out with for the meeting had insisted she stay for drinks and couldn't leave. She apologized for not texting me sooner, and apologized again for not being able to talk long since she was exhausted. I reassured her it was okay, and told her to get in touch with me in the morning after she woke up.

I was surprised when my phone rang shortly after 9 in the morning and Santana's name popped up on the screen.

"Well, good morning!" I greeted. "I wasn't expecting you to be up already."

"Good morning," Santana replied. "I felt bad about cancelling on dinner last night, so I really wanted to make it up to you today."

"It's okay, San," I reassured her. "Shit happens, and sometimes it sucks, but we can deal with it."

Santana laughed. "Yeah, but it doesn't mean that I don't feel bad for ruining our plans. So that is why you get to pick whatever you want us to do today."

I didn't necessarily feel that Santana needed to do anything special to make it up to me about our plans changing last night. Yeah, I was disappointed that I didn't get to see her like we normally did, but I understood. It really seemed like this was something that Santana wasn't going to give in about, however, so I thought about what I would like to do with her.

"How would you feel about going to the zoo?" I asked. I hadn't been to the zoo in a really long time. I didn't have anyone to go with me, and I would have felt strange walking around all the crowds of kids and families by myself. I loved seeing all of the animals and I really would like to go with Santana for some reason.

"I haven't been to a zoo since I was little," Santana said, and I could hear the smile in her voice. "That sounds like a lot of fun."

"Yay!" I enthused. "So we can do the zoo and, if you want, I can make the dinner I was going to last night tonight instead."

"I think we have a plan," Santana said.

I grinned and giggled a little. "I think so," I said.

"I can be there by ten if that works for you?"

My heart skipped its usual beat at the thought of Santana coming over. "That's perfect, Tana," I said.

We said our goodbyes and I hurried to get ready. I took a quick shower and got dressed in some jeans and a plain navy blue t-shirt. I put on some comfortable shoes since I knew we would be walking around a lot. I did my make-up and blow dried my hair before I pulled it up in a loose bun. I was just walking out of my bedroom when I heard a knock on the front door.

I couldn't stop the smile from spreading across my face at the knowledge of who was knocking. I walked quickly to the front door, my heart fluttering, and opened it to find Santana smiling at me.

"Hey, Britt," she greeted as she came in.

"Hey, Tana," I replied, shutting the door behind her. I noticed that she was dressed pretty similarly to me, except with a low v-neck tight black t-shirt.

"You about ready to go?" Santana asked.

"Just let me put the dogs out one more time real quick," I told her. "And I can drive if you want, since you drove all the way out here already."

Santana shrugged. "It doesn't matter to me, but if you want to drive that's fine," she said.

After the dogs had gone potty we got in my Escape and got on our way. It was only about a twenty minute drive to the zoo from my house, but we had to drive past all of the mall traffic. It surprisingly wasn't too bad yet for a Saturday morning.

I told Santana that she could put the radio on whatever she wanted, and she took advantage of it. She found some station playing 80's music and I couldn't stop myself from singing along. I stopped once I heard her quietly singing. My breath caught at her voice. I could tell, even though it wasn't that audible, that it was amazing. I wondered why she hadn't sung much before.

I apparently had been looking over at her too often and smiling at her singing, because she stopped.

"No, why'd you stop?" I protested.

"I don't really like people hearing me sing," she said quietly.

"Your voice is beautiful, Santana," I told her sincerely. "Why would you want to hide it?"

"I just never got a lot of praise before for it, and it made me uncomfortable singing in front of people," she replied, a little defensive.

I didn't like that she was insecure about her voice, because she could be singing professionally in my opinion. "Well, I think your voice is absolutely incredible, and I would love to hear you sing a lot more," I praised. "Seriously, like every day."

She giggled and I grinned at how she relaxed at my words. "I think you'd get a little sick of it if you heard it every day," she laughed.

"I like hearing your speaking voice every day," I said, "so why not your singing voice?"

I saw her shrug out of the corner of my eye as I drove. "Well your singing is pretty good, too," she told me.

I laughed. "No, it isn't," I said honestly. "It isn't horrible, but it is nothing like yours."

"I like your voice, Britt," she said.

I glanced at her quickly and saw that she was looking at me sincerely. I smiled, happiness filling my chest at the compliment. Even though I knew I wasn't a great singer, it was nice to hear that Santana liked my voice. "Well thank you, San."

The zoo was fairly crowded once we arrived. We parked and made our way up to the gate, and I paid for both of our tickets to Santana's dismay. I wouldn't let her win her argument, however, and we entered the zoo's gates.

We grabbed a map and decided to go to the North America section first. We stopped at each of the exhibits, trying to avoid the mass of strollers and little kids pressing as close to the barriers as they could.

I spent a lot of time at the river otter exhibit. I didn't know what it was about otters, but I absolutely loved them. I found them completely adorable, and I found myself telling Santana all about how otters will hold onto each other's hands in the water so they don't float away from each other. She just smiled good-naturedly at me and listened without complaint.

We trekked around the zoo, making our way through the Polar Frontier and then the Heart of Africa section. I took my time looking at the lion and cheetah exhibits as well. I loved the big cats. I had a soft spot in my heart for them, much like my big, fat cat at home. We circled around to finish up the rest of the animals in the North America section, again spending a little more time at the exhibits with the big cats.

Santana seemed to be having a good time. She looked like she preferred the gentler animals, although she claimed to like the predators. She appreciated all of them, even if she wasn't as into it as I was.

I had to stop at a vendor and buy a bottle of water to take my pill while we were walking around, but, once we finished with those three sections, we decided to grab some lunch. There was a place to get food toward the center of all of the different areas, so we decided to stop there.

We both got burgers and settled down at a table in the shade to eat. I was watching the kids running around and I got a little pang in my chest at what I was missing out on.

"Did you and Sam ever want kids?" Santana asked, snapping me out of my thoughts. She must have known what I was thinking. "Sorry if I'm being rude, it's just I read that pregnancy with myasthenia gravis can be difficult."

"We did," I told her. "We were obviously going to wait until I was done with school, but after my diagnosis we just kind of put it on an indefinite hold. We were both worried at what kind of stress it would put on my body, and we wanted to be a little more stable financially since it would be a more high risk pregnancy."

Santana gave me little smile. "I bet you'll be a great mom," she said sincerely.

I smiled sadly back. "I would hope I would be, but I don't think it is ever going to happen."

She frowned. "Why not?"

"I don't think I could do it by myself," I confessed. "And I don't think I will ever find someone who would be willing to put up with me for the rest of their life."

I gave a little laugh at myself.

Santana's frown grew deeper. "Don't say that, Britt," she demanded. "There are people out there who would love to be with you. You are gonna be a mom someday, okay?"

I nodded to her, grateful that she believed in me. "Okay," I agreed. "You know you'd be a pretty great mom, too."

Santana chuckled. "I don't know about that."

"Why not?" I asked, my brow furrowing a little at her answer.

"I mean, I would love to have kids someday," she said. "I just don't necessarily have the best patience and I'm afraid I would yell at them a lot."

"You've always been great with me, and I've been annoying around you plenty of times," I reassured her.

"You're different," she laughed. "You never annoy me."

I shrugged. "If you haven't snapped at me, then I'm sure you wouldn't yell at your kids. Unless they really deserved it, like if they stole the car or something," I joked.

Santana's eyes widened. "Oh God. Knowing my luck, my kids would totally do something like that."

I laughed at her reaction. "I doubt that. I'm sure whoever your wife is would help prevent any vehicle theft."

Santana smiled bashfully, looking down at her food. "Maybe."

We went back to finishing our food, and decided to do the Asia Quest section next. We both enjoyed seeing the elephants, and we naturally spent a little extra time at the tiger exhibit. We went to the aquarium part next, which was a little disappointing. We both really liked seeing the manatees though. It was amazing how graceful they were. Santana smiled as she watched them float through the water.

We went through the reptile house, which I wasn't too fond of. Santana said she found lizards fascinating, but I could have done without seeing them. I appreciated all animals, but I really preferred ones with fur to ones with scales.

Our next section was Australia and the Islands. There were more otters over there, and I spent a lot of time just watching them again. I caught Santana smiling at me a couple of times as I gushed over the creatures. I imagined that I looked quite foolish cooing over the otters, but I did love them. Santana liked walking through the kangaroo exhibit. I had to admit that it was pretty neat, but I was kind of afraid they were going to kick me or something. We both liked watching the koalas move in slow motion.

The last section was the Congo Expedition, which housed the zoo's gorillas. The gorillas always left me in awe. It was amazing how human-like they were. I laughed as Santana jumped when one of the gorillas banged against the glass near her. She wasn't too happy with the gorillas after that. I could tell she would have cursed the gorilla out if there weren't so many kids around. I knew she would be a really good mom after that.

We had spent a long time walking around the zoo. It was after 4 o'clock as we made our way back up to the entrance. I asked if Santana wanted to check out the gift shops before we left, and she said yes. I was browsing through the t-shirts when I lost track of Santana. I figured she would find me again eventually, so I went back to looking at the items for sale.

She came back up to me when I was looking at shot glasses. I saw that she had a bag in her hand, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Did you find something you liked?" I asked, pleased that she had a good enough time at the zoo to buy something.

She looked down at the bag before shyly looking back up at me. "Actually, it's for you," she said, holding the bag out toward me.

I shot her a confused look. "What? You didn't have to get me anything," I said.

She just shook her head a little and continued to hold the bag out. I rolled my eyes even as I grabbed the bag from her hand. I opened it and looked inside. I couldn't have stopped the grin from taking over my face even if I had wanted to.

"Aww, San, it's so cute!" I gushed as I pulled out the little stuffed otter.

I saw her face light up at my reaction to her gift. "I'm glad you like it," she told me, her eyes sparkling.

"You have to name it, since you picked it out," I demanded enthusiastically.

She giggled at me, rolling her eyes at my childlike enthusiasm. "But it's yours, Britt," she said. "You should name it."

"Nope," I told her, shaking my head. "You have to name it!"

"How about Otto then?" Santana suggested.

"Otto the Otter." I grinned. "That's perfect!"

She smiled and looped her arm through mine. "Let's get out of here," she said. "You've got your own animals at home to see."

I agreed and we walked out to my car. The whole drive home I couldn't stop smiling, a bubbly feeling constant in my chest. Santana reminded me to take my pill as soon as we walked in the door, and I hastily complied. I took my otter and put him on my bed. I knew I would be snuggling with it tonight. Not only was it cute, but Santana gave it to me. It made it that much more special.

After I let the dogs out and fed them and Lord Tubbington, we started to cook dinner. Santana helped me cut up all of the vegetables for the stir fry. She then kept me company in the kitchen while I went about finishing up everything else.

Santana gushed over dinner, as usual, and once we were finished we went into the living room to watch the second to last Harry Potter movie. I was pretty worn out after having such a big day at the zoo. We had walked a lot, and I was pretty tired. I leaned over on Santana as the movie played, and she wrapped her arm around my shoulders.

"You tired, Britt?" Santana asked quietly.

I nodded against her shoulder. "It was a lot of walking," I explained.

"Do you need to go to bed?"

"Unh-uh," I mumbled a negative. "I just need to get some rest."

"You sure? I can leave," she offered.

I lifted my head to look at her. I didn't want her freaking out that I was too weak, so I wanted to make sure she knew that I would be just fine. I really didn't want her to leave. As soon as I met her eyes, however, my heart fluttered. They were looking at me so softly, and I felt all of my feelings for her start to overwhelm me. The tingles I already had from being close to her intensified and my face flushed a little at how close our faces were together.

Her lips were just a few inches from mine. I really, really wanted to kiss her. I licked my lips a little and her eyes flickered to my mouth. God, she probably could tell I wanted to kiss her. I felt her arm twitch around my shoulders, and I was afraid she was going to call attention to my interest in her. I turned my head and sat up to get some distance between us. If I stayed where I was, I didn't think I could resist kissing her.

"I think I need to leave," Santana said, her voice tense.

"What? Why?" I asked, a little panicked. I snapped my head around to look at her, and she stood up from the couch, her fists clenched a little. God, she knew I liked her and she was freaking out. So stupid Brittany!

"Gabe was so wrong," I heard her mumble quietly before she addressed me. "I'm sorry Brittany, but I think I need to spend a few days away from you."

"I'm sorry, Santana," I pleaded. "Please don't leave. I don't want you to leave."

I was about ready to start tearing up. Santana's eyes were fixed on the ground, her whole body taut as if she were afraid she would fall apart if she moved.

"I can't do this anymore," she confessed quietly. "I've tried to fight my feelings for you, but it is getting too hard. I really don't want to be the lesbian that falls in love with her straight best friend, but I'm afraid that if I don't stop this now then I will."

"I'm not straight," I blurted out before the rest of her words sunk in. "Wait… you have feelings for me?"

I was so confused! I never thought she would like me back. Santana's head whipped up to look at me, her face a mask of confusion.

"Yeah, I do," she confirmed. "But what do you mean you're not straight?"

Oh my God, Santana has feelings for me! Like romantic feelings! I enthused internally.

I realized she wanted an explanation, and I figured it was past time. This whole situation was kind of screwed up. Even as I was trying not to grin like a maniac, I was trying to explain.

"I'm bi," I explained. "I realized I was attracted to girls as well as guys after I graduated high school, but I was with Sam so I never explored it. I definitely am into both though, and I know for certain that I am attracted to you and have feelings for you, too."

Santana's eyes widened at my confession. "Why didn't you tell me?"

I didn't know if she meant about my sexuality or my feelings for her, so I decided to answer for both. "I wanted to tell you I was bisexual after you came out to me, but I was a little shocked when you did and was taking too long to absorb it, I guess, and you moved the conversation onto something else. So I kind of felt like I missed the opportunity, and I never thought it would have mattered because I never thought you would have been interested in me the way I was interested in you. That's why I didn't tell you that I had feelings for you."

She frowned. "Why wouldn't you have thought that I could be interested in you?"

I shrugged, my low self-esteem making its appearance. "Because you are incredibly beautiful and amazing and sweet and adorable and sexy and so, so nice, and you could have any girl in the world. I thought you were straight to begin with, and when I found out you weren't, I just thought you were way out of my league," I told her. "I'm just a science nerd who had no friends and no life and who only had one relationship ever, and had been alone for the past two years."

Santana sat back down on the couch and took my hands in hers. "Britt, you are all of those things you said about me and more. You are the most awesome person I have ever met, and I've had a crush on you since you thought I was on a date with my brother," she said, looking sincerely into my eyes.

I laughed a little at my mistake when we first met, and I could feel the truth of her words sink into my heart. "I've had a crush on you since then, too," I confessed.

Santana grinned at that, squeezing my hands a little and I squeezed back as my emotions swelled. "Gabe thought you were into me then, and he told me to go to the hockey game with you to see how it turned out," she told me. "I wasn't so sure, but he said that the worst that could happen was we ended up friends. I thought you were maybe interested when you invited me to dinner, but then I saw your wedding picture and I got confused. I've been getting mixed signals ever since, but I never had any sure indication that you weren't straight, so I didn't want to say anything about how I felt to you. I was fine being your friend if that was what you wanted."

"I was so interested it was crazy," I said, smiling. "You don't know how hard it was for me to just be your friend. I am horrible at reading people, especially people I don't know that well, so I had no idea you liked me too. Even as we got to know each other better, I guess I believed too strongly that you wouldn't like me back. Besides, I was so scared that you would be horrified at the thought of me liking you that I tried to hide how I felt. That was probably why you were getting mixed signals."

Santana frowned a little again. "I don't understand why you would have thought that I would have been scared at the thought of you having feelings for me."

I looked down at our hands, a little embarrassed. "It's just that, nobody besides Sam ever really showed a real interest in me. I mean, I know people have found me attractive, but nobody besides him ever made the effort to get past my awkwardness and shyness before to really get to know me, so nobody wanted to date me. They just all assumed I wouldn't be interested in them when I had trouble holding a conversation or whatever. So I was kind of afraid that, after Sam died, I would be alone forever. And I didn't want to be, especially after I met you. I just thought that you would have thought I was too strange or weird to be in a relationship with, since that's what most people think."

"Brittany, those people are stupid because they didn't make the effort," Santana said. "But I have to say, their loss is my gain because now I have the chance to be with you. And I don't think you are strange or weird, I think you are sweet and cute and gorgeous and I really want to take you out on a date."

I looked up at her and the corners of my mouth turned upward slightly. "Really?" I asked, almost disbelieving.

She nodded, her own smile starting to form on her gorgeous lips. "Would you go on a date with me?"

I grinned now. "I would love to go on a date with you," I told her.

Santana broke out into a grin herself, and I really wanted to kiss her again. But I wasn't sure if it was the right time after everything that just happened.

"How about tomorrow? I don't think I can wait another week to take you out," she suggested.

"Tomorrow is perfect," I told her. I didn't think I could wait that long, either, so tomorrow would be best.

"Awesome," she said, still smiling. "Now are you feeling up to finishing the movie?"

I nodded, and she leaned back so she could stretch out on the couch. She opened her arms, an invitation to lay down cuddled up with her. We had cuddled before, but not quite like this. Our whole bodies would be in contact, and her arms would be wrapped around me. I didn't know if my heart could take it, but I couldn't resist.

I lay down so my head rested on Santana's chest, my body half on and half off of her body as I faced the television. I had my arms on either side of her waist and she wrapped her arms around my back, her hands resting low on my spine. My heart was pounding, and I could hear Santana's beating almost as hard. It was nice to know now that I affected her the way she affected me. A lick of arousal settled in my core at the way we were laying pressed together, and I fought to settle my breathing. Despite my body's reaction to her, I was the most content I could remember being.

I relaxed into her arms as the movie went on. I found myself drifting off a little. It had been a big day, with all of the walking and the emotional upheaval at revealing our feelings for each other. Plus, it was so comfortable being in Santana's arms, almost like it was where I was supposed to be all along.

One of Santana's hands started to run up and down my back lightly, and I started to come back into full consciousness. I mewled into her body as I buried my face into her. She brought her hand up to tuck my hair behind my ear and caressed my cheek.

"Britt, you need to get up sweetie," she cooed. The term of endearment made me smile. "The movie's over."

Holy crap, I didn't even realize I had been out of it for that long. "What time is it?" I asked groggily.

"It's almost nine," she said. "You need to take your pill soon, and I think you should probably head to bed. And I should probably go home."

"I don't want you to leave," I whined, squeezing my arms around her as if I could hold her there. If I didn't get up, she couldn't leave, right?

"I know, sweetie, I don't want to either," she agreed. "But I need to go home so I can plan a super awesome date for us tomorrow."

I lifted my head up to look at her, a smile taking over my face. "Super awesome, huh?"

She bit her lip on a smile, but her eyes were twinkling softly at me. She caressed my cheek with the back of her hand as she nodded. "Uh-huh, nothing but the best," she teased softly.

"With you, I don't think it could be anything but the best," I told her, half joking and half completely serious.

She laughed and I sat up reluctantly, immediately missing her body against mine. She sat up and leaned down to grab her shoes and slipped them on. We both got up from the couch and she said goodbye to the dogs as I shut the TV down. I walked her to the front door and she grabbed her stuff before turning back to me.

"I will call you tomorrow and let you know what time to be ready," she said.

"Okay," I agreed, "but you better call me tonight when you get home so I know you made it safely."

"Yes, mom," she teased. "And you better make sure you take your pill. I don't want you to be too weak for our date tomorrow."

"Yes, mom," I joked back.

Santana stepped forward to pull me in for a hug, and I returned it squeezing her hard. As she pulled back, she locked her eyes with mine and my breath caught. Her face leaned toward mine, and my heart pounded. I wanted to kiss her so bad, but I really wasn't sure if I was ready yet. I had never kissed anybody but Sam. What if I sucked? Would she not want to go on a date with me anymore?

I don't know if she sensed my nervousness or not, but she pressed a soft kiss to my cheek the corner of my mouth instead of my lips. My eyes fluttered closed at the contact and I inhaled deeply. Tingles shot through my whole body, starting from where her lips were touching me and spreading all over.

"Goodnight," she said, her voice low as she pulled back.

"Goodnight Santana," I replied, my eyes settling back on hers.

I pouted as I watched her get in her car, and after a final wave, she drove off. I locked up and let the dogs out a final time, and I made sure to take my pill before getting ready for bed. I washed my face, brushed my teeth, and dressed in my pajamas. I made sure I had some water by my bed for my morning pill, and then climbed under the covers. I pulled my otter close to me and tucked it under my chin. A thought struck me, and I reached over to grab my phone.

I returned to my original position, snuggling with my otter, and snapped a picture of myself. I sent the picture to Santana with a caption saying how I wished it was her, but at least I had something to cuddle with that reminded me of her. I turned the lamp off and settled down in bed, waiting on Santana to call.

I didn't have to wait too much longer before my phone rang.

"Hello, stranger," I greeted, smiling like an idiot. "Are you home?"

"I just walked in the door," she confirmed. "And you look so cute with your otter. I wish I could see that in person."

I could hear the pout in her voice, and I naturally pouted in response. "Me, too," I told her. "But I guess I can settle for Otto instead."

"I'm glad he can keep you company in my place," she said.

"I can't wait for our date tomorrow," I told her.

"Me either," she replied, and I could hear the smile in her voice.

"So what do you have planned for us?" I asked.

"Now I can't ruin the surprise," she teased.

I giggled. "You don't have any ideas yet, do you?"

"That's not true," she told me, a little offended. "I have some ideas, I just don't know exactly what I want to do yet."

"Whatever you pick will be perfect, San," I told her. "As long as I get to see you, we can just stay in and talk like normal and I would be fine."

"Well if that's the date criteria, then we've been dating for the past six weeks," she laughed.

"I wouldn't necessarily complain about that," I told her.

"No, Britt," she demurred. "I have to do something special for our first date. I need to wow you with my romantic side."

"Honey, you are plenty romantic already. I don't think you will have a problem with that," I said honestly. It was true. She had surprised me, a stranger, with cupcakes on my birthday. She had surprised me again to keep me company at the hockey game. She had been taking care to make sure I didn't forget my medication, and she bought me an adorable stuffed otter. Santana was incredibly romantic. I was already lucky to have her and we hadn't even gone on our date yet.

"I will do my best," she said. "Did you take your pill?"

"Yes, I did," I confirmed. "That's why I'm already in bed."

"Good girl," she told me. "But I know you need some sleep and I need to plan our date and get to sleep myself so I'm not tired for tomorrow."

"I don't wanna go," I protested. "I miss you."

It was such a change to be saying these kinds of things to Santana, but it was a nice change. It felt so comfortable and normal.

"I miss you too, Britt," she pouted. "But I will see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Fine," I huffed.

"Sweet dreams," Santana said softly.

"You too, San."

I disconnected the call reluctantly, but with a smile on my face. I never would have guessed this morning that I would be going on a date tomorrow with Santana. So much had happened today that changed my life. It changed my life in the best way possible. I couldn't wait to see what Santana had in store for us.

 **A/N: Sorry for the messed up first post. Hopefully this one works.**

 **And it's about time! They FINALLY admitted how they feel about each other. And Santana confessed first, but only because Brittany was on the verge of kissing her before she backed out. So was the long wait worth it? Do you think Santana getting the otter for Brittany was super cute like I did? I think both of them are pretty relieved to get their secrets off of their chests and they will be much more comfortable with each other. And they even already talked a little about kids in the future :)**

 **We get their first date next chapter! Do you guys think Santana will go all out for it? I think she wants to make a good impression now that she knows Brittany's interested and she won't have to hold back. Do you think Brittany will be a nervous wreck, or will she be just excited for it? Do you think we will get a first kiss? Let me know your thoughts! I really love hearing from you all, and I try to make sure to reply to everyone I can! Sorry to the guests who I can't message- just know that I do read all of the reviews and I greatly appreciate you taking the time to leave your comments and feedback!**

 **So much like Santana was last chapter, I am unfortunately sick. Unlike Santana, I do not have someone like Brittany to take care of me and make me soup so I must suffer alone :( I am hoping that some meds and curling up in m bed and falling asleep to a movie will cure me, so fingers crossed! Send good vibes my way**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

I woke up when my alarm went off just before six the next morning to take my pill. I let the dogs out and fed the animals as usual, then got back in bed. The only trouble was I couldn't fall back asleep. I was too excited thinking about my date later in the day with Santana.

I wanted to call her then and tell her I couldn't wait to see her, but that was just really crazy. Way too needy before we even had our first date. I just really wanted to go on this date and move our relationship forward. It felt like I had been waiting years for Santana to come into my life, and I was more than ready for this.

I knew I would regret not getting anymore sleep later, but I got out of bed because it was pointless just continuing to lie there. I just hoped that I wouldn't be too tired when I was with Santana. I went and poured myself a bowl of cereal and made a cup of hot chocolate to give myself a little caffeine boost.

After I was finished with breakfast, I decided to continue reading Catching Fire, which I had borrowed from Santana after I finished The Hunger Games. It was hard to concentrate to start with as my thoughts kept drifting toward Santana, but I eventually lost myself in the book. The reading ended up making me sleepy, so I decided after an hour to go ahead and get back in bed.

I popped in Beauty and the Beast with the intention of falling asleep. I didn't make it twenty minutes into the movie before I drifted off, cuddled up with Otto and Lord Tubbington curled at my feet. It felt like I had just closed my eyes when my phone ringing woke me up.

"Hello," I said groggily, not checking the caller ID before answering.

"Good morning Sleeping Beauty," the amused caller greeted.

"San? What time is it?" I asked, fully waking up as the object of my affection was on the phone.

"It's almost ten," she replied. "Were you that tired from yesterday that you were still asleep?"

I could hear the concern in her voice. "No, I just couldn't get back to sleep after my alarm went off this morning," I hastily reassured her. "I ended up finally getting sleepy again and fell back asleep just about an hour ago."

"I'm sorry for waking you up," she apologized.

"No, it's fine. I needed to get up soon anyways," I told her.

"Are you sure? I can let you get some more sleep if you need it," she said, still sounding a little concerned.

"I'm fine San, I promise," I stated. "I am fully awake and ready to go now."

She chuckled a little. "You don't need to get ready to go quite yet, Britt," she said. "I just wanted to call and see how you were feeling this morning and hear your voice because I miss you."

I smiled dopily at her saying she missed me. "I miss you, too," I said. "I really am excited for our date, and I am feeling perfect so you don't need to worry about anything."

"Great," she said happily. "So I was thinking about picking you up around 3:30 if that's okay with you?"

I was a little disappointed that it was so long from now, but I knew I couldn't expect Santana to come over right this minute. "That sounds fine," I told her. "What should I wear?"

I was worried about how to prepare for the date. I hadn't been on a date in like ten years. At least not like a real date.

"Um, I guess something fairly casual but that can be dressy," Santana explained. I just got even more confused. "Like, maybe a sundress or nice pants and a dressy top or something."

"Okay, I guess I'll figure something out," I said hesitantly.

"I'm sorry, I don't know how to explain what I mean," she apologized.

"It's okay," I told her. "I'm sure I have something that will work."

I at least hoped that I did. I had no clue exactly what Santana had planned, so I wasn't sure how dressed up I should get. Even though she said fairly casual, she also said dressy. I knew I would be looking through my closet pretty thoroughly to find something I thought would work.

"I can't wait to see you," Santana said softly, and I grinned as all my attention shifted to seeing her again and away from any anxiety I had about the date.

"I can't wait to see you, either."

"I should probably go so I can get some things prepared," she said reluctantly. "I will get in touch with you later."

"Do you have to go?" I pouted.

"Yeah, sweetie," she said sadly. "But it is only so I can get everything ready for our date."

"I guess that's okay then," I teased, pleased to hear her call me 'sweetie' again.

"I will see you in a bit."

"Bye, San," I said.

"Bye," Santana replied.

I disconnected the call and squealed a little into my otter. I was so freaking happy to be going on a date with Santana!

I was definitely awake now, so I got out of bed and gave the dogs some attention. I decided to take a bath and relax for a bit. I shaved my legs and soaked in the bubble bath. When I finished with my bath I dressed in some sweats and a t-shirt. It was about lunchtime, so I made myself a sandwich. I didn't want to eat too much since Santana would be coming in a few hours.

I made sure to take my pill and then went back to reading the book until about 1 o'clock, when I decided I should probably start deciding on what to wear. I went to my closet and searched through my clothes. I started to stress about what to wear, but tried to remember that it was just Santana and she would tell me if what I was wearing wasn't okay. I decided on a loose, flowing white skirt that came past my knees with a yellow top. I figured that it was casual enough, but it could be dressy enough if we went somewhere nice.

It took longer than I wanted to pick out an outfit, so I rushed to get in the shower just before 2pm. After the shower, I got ready. I styled my hair to fall in waves over my shoulders and did my make up so my blue eyes would stand out. I put on a light pink lipstick and then slipped one a pair of low heeled sandals. I finished my outfit with a pair of chunky yellow earrings and a heart shaped necklace.

I ended up being ready just after 3 o'clock. Santana had texted me a few minutes earlier letting me know she was on her way. I tried to relax on the couch as I waited for her to arrive, but I ended up pacing. I decided to go out on the back porch when I let the dogs out to try to stop myself from checking out the front window every minute. Once the dogs had enough of running around in the yard, I followed them back inside to wait. Thankfully I didn't have too much longer to anticipate Santana's arrival.

At 3:29 Santana knocked on the door. I practically ran to the door, Lance and Lady running after me barking at my excitement.

"Hush," I scolded them as I turned to pull open the door.

My breath caught and my mouth dropped open as I revealed Santana standing on the front porch. She was dressed in a knee length hip hugging black skirt with a tight dark purple top and matching low heels. Her hair was loose over her shoulders and she looked so amazingly gorgeous.

"Brittany," she breathed, "you look beautiful."

The words spurred my lungs to start working again and my eyes met her chocolate brown gaze. Looking into her eyes sent my heart fluttering, but also grounded me enough to speak. "So do you," I told her as I blushed. "Absolutely gorgeous."

She smiled shyly and I returned it. She brought the hand I hadn't realized was behind her back forward and handed me a bright blue carnation.

"I tried finding something that matched your eyes, but I couldn't get anything that could fully capture the color," she explained to me. "This was the closest I could get."

I swore I melted into a big ball of mush at that. Santana was definitely good at the romance. I could feel my emotions pool into my chest and I fought off any crying at how amazingly perfect Santana was at this whole first date thing.

"It's beautiful Santana," I gushed, taking it gently from her outstretched hand. I stepped back from the doorway, indicating for Santana to come in. "Just let me put it in some water really quick and then we can leave."

She nodded to me and followed as I walked into the kitchen. I didn't have a small enough vase, so I pulled out a tumbler and filled it with water before I stuck the single bloom in it. I placed it on the center of the kitchen table, in prominent sight of anyone who walked into the room. Santana tried to hide a smile at that, but I caught the twitch of her lips.

"Do you need to let the dogs out or anything before we go?" Santana asked.

"Nope," I said as I shook my head. "I just need to grab my purse and we can go."

I made sure to grab my pill container and put it in my bag and followed Santana out of the kitchen.

"I was too busy to remind you about your pill earlier, so did you take it on time?" Santana asked as we walked.

"Yes, I did," I promised.

She smiled at me and we headed out to her car.

"So are you going to tell me where we are going?" I asked her curiously.

"No," she said mysteriously and pulled out of the driveway.

We didn't drive for too long before she pulled into the entrance for Sharon Woods park. I wondered what Santana was up to. This made sense for the casual part of our outfit, but we definitely didn't need to dress up to go to the park. She pulled into a spot near the picnic area by the lake. We got out of the car and she popped the trunk so she could pull out the small picnic basket she had in there.

I couldn't help but smile at how adorable this all was. A picnic in the park was super romantic. But I could just tell that this was only the beginning of the date, and I wondered what Santana had planned for us later.

She led us to a spot near the water and set the basket down. She pulled a blanket out of the basket and spread it over the ground before motioning me to sit down. Santana joined me on the ground and started pulling things out of the basket. She started with a couple bottles of water, handing one to me and setting one by her side. Then she pulled out a bag with slices of French bread in it, followed by a container of a variety of sliced cheeses and then a container with strawberries in it.

"So I figured we could have a little appetizer here before we go get dinner," she said a little nervously.

"This is amazing, San," I told her sincerely. "And I love strawberries."

She smiled at me then and opened the container of the red berries for me. I immediately took one and bit into it, the sweet juice hitting my tongue. I must have made a face at how good the fruit tasted because Santana giggled before grabbing her own strawberry and taking a bite.

We didn't talk too much as we ate our bits of fruit, bread, and cheese by the water. We were just content to be with each other like this. I was glad Santana hadn't brought too much of the food with her since she had said that we were still going out to dinner. This was the perfect start to the evening.

After we had eaten as much as we dared, we tore the rest of the bread into pieces and threw the bits into the water for the ducks. Then we packed up the basket and Santana looped her arm through mine as she walked me back to the car. It was just time for me to take my next pill, so Santana made sure I took it on time as usual.

Santana then drove us over to Easton. There were so many places to eat here that I had no clue where we were going to go. After we parked, she led the way to Brio. I smiled at the thought of eating Italian with her again, reminiscent of the first meal I cooked for her.

We had reservations so we were seated right away. Our waiter, a dapper looking brunette man, approached us shortly after.

"Good evening, ladies," he said. "My name is Seth and I will be your server tonight. Could I interest you in something to drink, perhaps some wine?"

"I'll just have water thanks," Santana told him to my surprise.

"Water for me too, please," I said. Seth nodded and went to bring us some water and give us time to look at the menu. "You can have some wine if you want to Tana. I can drive us home."

Santana shook her head at me with a small smile. "I don't want to drink tonight, Britt," she confessed. "I want to have a completely clear head so I can remember every detail of our first date."

I grinned and looked down bashfully as my cheeks flushed red. "I'm sure one glass wouldn't impair you too much," I argued, wanting her to enjoy her evening to the fullest.

"Nope, I am not gonna even have one sip," she said, her voice light but leaving no room for argument.

I continued to smile at Santana's adorableness on this date and perused the menu. Seth came back a moment later with our waters and we ordered. Santana ordered pasta and I got a Margherita flatbread.

"This restaurant is pretty cool," I said, looking around at the authentic Italian décor.

"It is," Santana agreed.

"I think I would like to go to Italy someday," I said, contemplating maybe a nice vacation in Rome and Venice or something.

"That would be interesting," Santana said with a smile.

"If you could go anywhere in the world, where is the place you would want to go most?" I asked, curious.

Santana shrugged. "I don't know," she said, thoughtful. "Maybe some tropical island with a secluded beach or something. What about you?"

I grinned as I thought about my dream trip. "I want to go to Ireland," I told her.

Santana looked a little surprised by my confident statement. "Why Ireland?"

"Because it is beautiful. There are so many castles to explore, and so much history and mythology there. And it is just… magical," I said, my wonder evident.

Santana was giving me a happy smile and her eyes were sparkling. "I think I want to change my answer," she stated. "The way you talk about it, I think I want to go to Ireland, too."

I smiled at her as my thoughts immediately went to the possibility of going on a trip there with Santana someday. "I think you would really love it there," I said honestly.

"I think I would, too," she said, still smiling.

Seth interrupted us then with our food. It looked delicious and smelled it, too. I eagerly dug in and was glad that it tasted as good as it looked.

"This is really good," I said to Santana.

"It looks like it," she replied after swallowing her bite of pasta. "My pasta is good too, but I think you make better pasta."

I could tell she meant her compliment. I smiled bashfully and felt a little bit of redness cover my cheeks. I didn't really know how to respond, so I just took another bite of my food.

Santana was truly remarkable. She was like a practically impossible perfect mix of beautiful, sexy, sweet, sassy, romantic, and confident. I didn't understand how she was into me at all, but I wasn't going to be ungrateful for it. I was going to do my best to make this relationship, if we ended up having one, work out.

"So Gabe wanted me to ask you if you wanted to go out dancing again sometime in the next couple of weeks," Santana said. "Since the Blue Jackets aren't in the playoffs, he has a lot more free time coming up."

"Sure," I said. I would love to go dancing with Santana and Gabe again, but I didn't want Santana to end up the same way she did last time.

Santana seemed to sense my less than enthusiastic response. "We don't have to go if you don't want to," she reassured me. "I mean, if you got too tired last time or whatever…"

She trailed off, leaving the opening for me to explain my hesitation. "I would like to go dancing with you guys," I explained. "I just want you to have a good time too, if we go."

Santana's eyes widened as she realized I was hinting at her strange behavior that night at the club. She took a drink of her water and cleared her throat, avoiding my eyes. "I had a good time, Britt," she began, "I just didn't like seeing you dancing with Gabe."

My brow furrowed in confusion. "Why not?"

Santana bit her lip a little before she responded. "I didn't think you were into me then, and I was afraid you were maybe into my brother," she confessed. "So I avoided you guys and drank a little too much because I was jealous."

It suddenly all made sense. Santana had been jealous of me dancing with Gabe that night and that was why she had acted so strangely. That was why she had gotten drunk. And her feelings she had explained the weird ending to the night outside her bedroom door.

"You had nothing to be jealous about," I said softly, reaching out and covering her hand playing with her knife on the table. "I was never into Gabe. I was into you."

Santana smiled a little and looked up at me through her lashes. "I know that now," she told me. "But I didn't then." She looked up at me fully then, meeting my eyes. "Regardless, I would really love to go out dancing with you. For real dancing with you this time."

I smiled happily and nodded. I would love to be able to dance with Santana and not worry about getting too close or that it would be inappropriate dancing for just friends. I would be able to dance with her the way I really wanted to, and the thought excited me.

"I think that would be amazing, Santana."

We continued eating our food, chatting happily with each other. We both mentioned how we didn't want to go back to work tomorrow, especially after such a great weekend. Seth came to clear our plates away when we were finished.

"Are you ladies interested in dessert this evening?"

"No thanks," Santana answered, a little to my surprise. We usually did something for dessert when we had dinner together, even if it was just a cookie or something. Santana shot me a smile. "Don't worry, Britt, the night isn't over yet."

I could only assume she meant that we would get dessert later. I was just happy that dinner wasn't the end of the date. I didn't care so much if I got dessert now or not, I wanted to know what more Santana had in store.

Seth dropped our check off at the table and Santana batted my hand away as I reached for it.

"Come on, Tana," I protested. "What do I owe for my food?"

We usually split the check and paid for our own portions when we went out to eat. There were the occasional times when one or the other of us paid for something for the other person, but we usually were responsible for ourselves.

Santana looked a little peeved at my question. "Seriously? I asked you out on a date, Brittany. I don't expect you to pay when I take you out."

"But we always split the check before," I argued.

Santana shook her head at me. "We didn't go on dates before. I ask you out, I pay for the date. That's just the way it is."

"Well then next time I am going to make sure I ask you out and then I will pay," I stated firmly.

Santana smirked at me. "So you are already wanting to go on another date with me when this one isn't even over yet?"

I smiled teasingly. "Only if I get to pay next time."

"As long as you go out with me again, then I am willing to let that happen," she grinned.

I grinned back, joy radiating through me. Santana was having as good of a time as I was on this date. Not only that, but she wanted to go out again. I was ecstatic.

Santana settled the bill and we departed the restaurant. We walked around the shopping center slowly, not in any particular hurry to get to wherever we were headed next. I felt Santana's hand brushing against mine as we walked, and I couldn't resist taking it and threading our fingers together.

Santana squeezed my hand as our fingers intertwined and I ran my thumb against hers. I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye and saw her bite her lip on a smile. I could feel my own smile tug at my lips. Even something as simple and innocent as holding Santana's hand sent tingles through me and made my heart jump. I had a feeling that being with Santana could make me the happiest I had ever been.

I followed Santana's lead and we ended up at Jeni's Ice Cream. I grinned at our destination.

"I love ice cream!" I enthused.

"I know," Santana said, amused.

I was a little confused by that. In all of the times we had eaten together I didn't remember having ice cream. I didn't even remember talking about ice cream with Santana before.

"How did you know?" I asked.

"You were talking to Gabe about it the first day we met," she told me. "You said that ice cream was your favorite, followed by cake and brownies."

I couldn't believe she remembered that. We were strangers then. We knew nothing about each other, and we had just met minutes before.

"I can't believe you remember that," I said in awe.

She shrugged, looking down at the ground shyly. "I remember pretty much everything about you," she confessed.

God, she was unbelievable. I could feel my heart stop beating in my chest only to start pounding again. I squeezed her hand in mine as I felt the sting of tears at the back of my eyes. "Thank you," I whispered.

"For what?" Santana asked me, looking at me in confusion.

"For being you," I told her sincerely.

Her face broke out in a smile and her eyes sparkled. I could definitely see myself falling for Santana. It wouldn't be hard. The thought scared me a little, but also sent a thrill through my stomach.

"Come on, Britt," she said playfully, lightening the suddenly serious mood. "Let's go get you some ice cream."

I nodded and we headed into the ice cream shop. I ordered a chocolate cone and Santana got some sort of almond brittle flavor. We headed back out to walk around while we ate our ice cream. The ice cream was delicious, but I had to admit that my mind was more on the woman beside me than the ice cream I was consuming.

The sun was setting and it was starting to get a little chilly out. Eating ice cream didn't help with me staying warm, and I got goosebumps and started to shiver. I hadn't thought to bring a jacket since it had been such a nice day earlier.

"You cold?" Santana asked, concerned.

"A little," I said, rubbing my free hand along my arm to try to warm myself up a bit.

"Do you want to head back to the car while we finish our ice cream?"

"Only if you want to," I said. I didn't want to ruin anything else on the date if she had something else planned.

"It's fine," she told me. "I was planning on driving you home after we ate our ice cream anyways."

I was a little relieved that she hadn't had something more planned for us to do. Not because I wanted the date to be over. That couldn't be further from the truth. It was just starting to get late and both of us had to be up early for work in the morning, and Santana still had to drive home after she took me home.

"Okay then," I said, and Santana nodded.

We started to walk back to the parking garage and I smiled as Santana took my hand again. We finished our ice cream cones and then Santana turned on the heat a little in the car to help warm me up. I could see she had some goosebumps on her arms but she wasn't shivering like I was. She must be able to tolerate the chilliness a bit better than me.

Once I was no longer cold, Santana pulled out and started the drive home. I wanted to hold her hand again, but she had both of her hands on the wheel. I kept looking over at her and she glanced at me, catching me out. She smiled and took her right hand off of the wheel, extending it out with her palm up. I smiled and laced our fingers together.

We kept our hands linked pretty much the whole ride home. Once we pulled into my driveway, I reluctantly let go. Santana turned the car off and we both got out and walked up to my front door. I started to unlock the door only to have Santana put her hand on my arm to stop me.

"Are you not gonna come in?" I asked, confused as to why she had prevented me from going in the house.

She shook her head a little. "As much as I would love to be able to hang out with you more tonight, I think I should go home," she said reluctantly. "We both have work tomorrow, and I'm afraid that if I stay then we will be up too late. And you need to rest."

I pouted. Not only did I not want her to go, but I was a little worried that she didn't want to go inside with me. Was the date not that good? I thought she would want to spend more time together. And we hadn't even kissed or anything. I thought things had been going well, but now I wasn't so sure.

"Okay," I said hesitantly. "I guess I will talk to you later."

Her lips twitched a little and she looked amused as she stepped closer to me. "I will call you when I get home," she promised. "And I will talk to you tomorrow, too."

I nodded, not able to fight my disappointment. Her eyes darkened as she they darted between my eyes and my lips. "But first…" she breathed as her face came closer to mine.

My heart pounded as my eyes locked onto her lips that were getting nearer to my own. She brought her hand up to tuck my hair behind my ear right before her lips met mine. My eyes fluttered closed at the feeling of her mouth barely caressing my own. My breath caught as her lips pulled away slightly, and I released a shaky exhale through my nose as they came back to press more firmly against mine. My heart was threatening to beat out of my chest and my hands were shaking as they clenched.

The kiss felt like it lasted mere seconds and yet infinite minutes. It was nothing more than an innocent brush of our lips together, really. Santana held her mouth against mine gently, not trying to deepen the kiss. It was the best kiss I had ever had.

Santana pulled away and my eyes slowly opened to see her looking up at me with a dazed expression. "I've wanted to do that for so long," she whispered. "It was even better than I imagined."

"Uh-huh," I squeaked in agreement, utterly breathless and speechless. My eyes were still locked on hers, unable to look at anything other than her.

"I should go," she said quietly, her eyes not leaving mine.

I nodded. She caressed my cheek and her eyes closed as she took in a breath. Her eyelids shuttering her chocolate gaze was enough to break me out of my stupor. I was still out of it, but I could at least think now. Maybe.

"Goodnight, Brittany," she whispered as her eyes opened again.

"Night, San," I whispered back, stepping into her and wrapping my arms around her in a hug.

Santana's arms wrapped around my neck tightly and I buried my face in her neck. I reluctantly let go when she pulled back, but my hand caught hers as she started to walk away.

"You're going to call me tonight, right?" I asked, wanting to prolong my night with her any way I could.

"I promise," she confirmed, giving my hand a final squeeze before she stepped off the porch.

I watched her walk to her car. She opened her door and gave me a wave before she got in. I unlocked my door and opened it to step in as I heard her car start. I turned around in the doorway and waved at her as she started to back out of the driveway. Once she started to drive down the street, I shut the door and leaned back against it. I squealed in excitement at how amazing the night turned out. Unfortunately, that freaked Lance and Lady out and they started barking like mad.

It took some scolding and a lot of effort to calm them down, but, finally, after letting them outside and giving them dinner, they had settled. It was nearly 9pm, so I washed my face and brushed my teeth and everything to get prepared for bed. I got in bed and snuggled with Otto to wait for Santana's call. She didn't disappoint. She had made this the best date I had ever been on, and I couldn't wait for the next one.

 **A/N: There you have it! First date and first kiss! Brittany and Santana both seem pretty gaga over each other already, so I wonder how long it will be before we get love confessions?**

 **What do you guys think of the date Santana planned? Romantic? Too much? Not enough? And Brittany was surprisingly not very nervous. Maybe she already felt comfortable enough with Santana that their date wasn't a scary thought for her and she was just more excited than anything? How do you guys think their relationship will progress? Let me know your thoughts!**

 **I am feeling a lot better, but I mostly can't breathe through my nose still and I feel like I could sleep for a week straight. At least I am slowly getting back to normal, but I wanted to make sure I got this chapter posted for you guys and thank everyone for the good vibes they sent my way! I appreciate it! Just as I appreciate everyone for reading and reviewing :)**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

The next morning I awoke fearing the night before had been a dream. It wasn't until I got a text from Santana before I left for work telling me she missed me and telling me I was beautiful that I really could believe it was real. I was practically floating on a cloud the rest of the day.

Gus could tell something had happened the moment he saw my face. I was glad that I had opened up to him. He let me gush to him about my date with Santana and how amazing she was. He was happy for me.

I also heard from Gabe. Apparently Santana had told him that we had gone out on a date, and he asked me how it went. I raved about it and all he told me was "It's about time". Apparently Santana hadn't been lying when she said that he believed we were into each other. He was happy for us and even started calling me sis-in-law, which made me ridiculously happy for some reason.

Santana kept her word and let me pay when I took her out later that week. I wasn't as good at all of the romance like Santana was, but we had a good time with the traditional dinner out and a movie. Our dates eventually evolved into the way our evenings had been as just friends, with either dinner out or at my place followed by hanging out watching a movie in my living room. The only real difference was that our evenings now had a lot more cuddling and kissing involved. She had started to relax about reminding me about my medication when she saw how I was good about remembering since we had started spending a lot more time together. It was a bit of a relief, but she was always there to remind me if I was running a bit late on taking it.

Santana and I did go out dancing with Gabe one night in May. It couldn't have been any more different than the previous time we went out to the club together. Santana and I danced together all night, and she took breaks with me when I needed a rest. Gabe danced with us every once in awhile, but he knew that if he tried to dance with me then Santana would go off on him. She definitely had a jealous streak and liked to make it clear to anyone interested that she was there with me. I found it incredibly hot.

Before I knew it, a month had passed since our first date. Santana wanted to do something special to celebrate, and I let her plan a special night out for us. This time she wasn't keeping it a secret, however. She planned for us to go see the Broadway show for The Lion King that was in Columbus after a nice dinner out downtown.

It was a Friday night and Santana and I both left our respective works a little early in order to get ready for the evening. I showered and put on a navy blue dress with matching heels. I put my hair up into a smooth bun, put on a simple matching set of earrings and a necklace, and finished up my make-up just before Santana knocked on the front door.

"Sorry I'm early," she apologized as I opened the door.

"It's okay," I said as I took in her appearance.

She was dressed in a simple black dress with high black heels. Her hair was loose, which I loved on her. Her only accessory was a pair of diamond studs in her ears. She looked beautifully elegant.

"You look beautiful, San," I breathed.

"And you look gorgeous, Britt," she told me, awe in her voice.

I stepped aside to let her into the house and shut the door behind us as I pulled her in for a kiss. My hands cupped her cheeks as my mouth met hers for a lingering peck. I desperately wanted to deepen the kiss, but Santana pulled back before I could. She brought her hand up in between us and that was when I noticed the single purple rose in her hand.

I smiled at her gesture, taking the rose from her. She hadn't given me a flower since our first date, so this was obviously something special for tonight.

"Thank you," I said. "It's gorgeous."

Santana gave me a guarded smile. She seemed a little nervous about something. "I thought it was pretty like you," she complimented.

I wasn't sure if that was why she got me the flower or not. She was acting a little strange about it, but I had no clue why she would be nervous about giving me a flower. Particularly since it wasn't the first time she had done so. I decided to just let it go and wrote it off to nerves about our big night out.

"I'll go put this in some water," I said as I walked toward the kitchen.

Santana followed me, cooing over Lance and Lady as they came up to her to get attention from her. I pulled out the small vase I had bought after our first date for the carnation she had gotten me then. I filled it with water and put in the bloom, admiring how perfectly purple it was.

"Sorry guys, I didn't bring anything for you tonight," Santana told my dogs, who were prancing around her. They loved her and always got excited when she came over. A lot of it probably had to do with the fact that she often brought treats with her, but I knew that they loved getting attention from her even if she didn't have any goodies with her.

"You spoil them, Tana," I teased her, watching her as she lavished attention on my babies.

"I can't help it," she defended. "They are awesome, much like their mom."

I grinned at her. "Well then, that must be why they love you so much," I said playfully. "Because you are pretty awesome yourself."

Santana rolled her eyes a little as she laughed, and I giggled with her. "Are you almost ready?" Santana asked after she gave up on petting the dogs.

I nodded. "Yeah, I just need to feed them and let them out again real quick," I told her.

I went over to their food and scooped out some into each of their bowls. Then I added some more food to Lord Tubbington's bowl, and he waddled in after hearing the sound of the kibble hitting the bowls. Santana came up behind me and wrapped her arms around my waist and rested her chin on my shoulder. I leaned back into her embrace, covering her arms with my own as we waited for the dogs to finish their dinner.

Touches and embraces like this had become much more common since we started dating. I absolutely savored each one. It felt like we were always meant to be like that, like it was unnatural to do anything but that.

"I missed you," she murmured.

"I missed you, too," I replied, squeezing my arms on hers around my waist.

We hadn't seen each other since Tuesday this week, since Santana had been so busy with work. She worked a little extra hard this week in order to leave early today, so we hadn't been able to go on another date besides the last one we had on Tuesday, which had consisted of a quick dinner downtown followed by a brief make-out session at Santana's apartment before I had to go. We spoke every day and always talked before bed, but it wasn't the same as seeing one another. I found that the more time I spent with her, the less I wanted to be apart from her.

Santana gave me a final squeeze and pressed a peck to the back of my jaw before she released me. The dogs had finished eating, so we both headed to the living room so I could let Lance and Lady out.

"I'm excited for tonight," I told her as the dogs did their business.

She smiled at me. "I am, too," she said. "I've never seen it before, so I have really been looking forward to it."

"I haven't seen it either," I confessed. "I've actually never seen a lot of shows. I never really had time and Sam was more into watching sports than going to see a play or the ballet or something.

"Maybe we can do more if it then," Santana suggested.

I grinned and nodded in agreement. Lance and Lady made their way into the house and I closed and locked the back door behind them. Santana and I grabbed our things and made our way downtown.

Santana parked close to the theater and we walked to a Latin restaurant nearby. I was slowly starting to learn more places downtown since I had started hanging out with Santana and Gabe, but I hadn't even heard of most of the places they had taken me to before they introduced me to them. This was one of them, and the food looked pretty good from what I saw on peoples' plates when we walked in.

We were seated and the server went to get our drinks. As per usual on our dates when Santana drove, she refrained from ordering anything alcoholic. I was glad that she had relaxed enough about drinking around me to have a drink or two when I took her out. After we got our drinks, we placed our order. Santana got some sort of fried plantain thing and I ordered some sort of Caribbean crab cakes.

We were talking about what we thought the show was going to be like while we ate when I saw her. I immediately froze, my fork halfway to my mouth. Santana noticed something was up right away.

"Brittany? What's wrong?" I turned my eyes toward Santana, who was looking at me with concern. I gave her a small smile meant to reassure her as I set my fork down.

"Courtney's here," I told her and nodded in her ex's direction.

Santana frowned and turned around to look where I had indicated. Unfortunately, when she did, Courtney spotted her. The brunette's face broke into a sly grin and she got up from her table and provided some excuse to the man she was with before she made her way over to our table. Santana whipped her head back around to me, a hint of panic in her eyes at the thought of her ex torturing us again.

"Santana!" Courtney enthused as she got to our table. "What a coincidence!"

I rolled my eyes at the woman's overenthusiastic greeting. She was definitely laying it on thick.

"Courtney," Santana greeted, clearly unimpressed.

"I see you are still hanging on to this one," Courtney said, indicating me with a jerk of her head. "Still couldn't find anything better?"

I felt both anger and a sinking disappointment that someone else could see that Santana was out of my league. I hated Santana's ex, and I knew she was trying to get a rise out of us, but I couldn't help but feel a sting at her barb.

"Shut your mouth, or I will shut it for you," Santana hissed.

"Oooh, I thought she was just a friend? Or have you finally decided you were desperate enough to sink to that level?"

My fists clenched and I desperately wanted to punch the green-eyed woman in the face. "You are a bitch, you know that?" I confronted her. "You lost and she doesn't want you anymore, so just leave."

"I'm sorry whatever your name is, but I don't think Santana has ever said she doesn't want me," Courtney smirked at me.

I opened my mouth to retort, but Santana stopped me. "Britt, don't," she told me before turning to her ex, a determined look on her face. "Courtney, I absolutely don't want you anymore. I haven't for a really long time, and I have found something way better."

I could see Santana's words chip away at the confidence of her ex a little, particularly when Santana smiled at me. I thought maybe I could drive the point home a little. "Thanks, baby," I gushed to Santana, smiling back at her. "I think you definitely found something way better."

Santana's smile widened when I said 'baby'. It was the first time I had called her that, and I found that I liked the word slipping from my lips when referring to her. It must have done the trick, because Courtney looked angry.

"Well, Britt, was it?" Courtney began.

"It's Brittany," I corrected firmly, adding the 'bitch' in my head, and she scowled.

"You must be incredibly smitten to overlook how bad in bed Santana is," she said scornfully. "I mean, I had to go elsewhere just to get some satisfaction."

Santana's face fell at her ex's dig. I could tell that it was something that Santana had worried about; that maybe if she had been better at something, anything that had dissatisfied her girlfriend, then Courtney wouldn't have cheated. But I knew that it was nothing about Santana that caused the woman to stray.

"No, _Courtney_ ," I said her name with a little disgust, "You went elsewhere because you're a cheating whore who wouldn't know how to be in a mature relationship if your life depended on it. You clearly didn't care about Santana, otherwise you wouldn't have had affairs. But it doesn't matter now, because you will never, _never_ get her again. I'm not as stupid as you, and I have no plans of letting her go."

Courtney scowled even further and went to open her mouth to probably provide some sort of retort, but I interrupted her. "Oh, and Santana more than satisfies me in every way possible, so maybe it was just something wrong with you," I said, leaving no room to misinterpret what I meant. Even though Santana and I hadn't had sex yet, we had made out _a lot_ and if she made me feel the way I did just after kissing her, then I was pretty sure she would have no problem in the bedroom when we made it there. Courtney didn't need to know that we hadn't made it that far yet though.

Courtney huffed and spun on her heel, striding angrily back to her table where the man was watching her with a little confusion on his face. I took a breath to try to calm my racing heart at what I had just done and turned back to Santana to see her smirking at me.

"What?" I asked innocently.

She shook her head in awe. "You're fucking amazing," she said.

I blushed at her compliment, pleased that she was happy that I stood up for her. The feeling made me feel like I would do nearly anything for her if it made her that happy.

"Anything for you baby," I said quietly.

Santana grinned again. "So, 'baby', huh?"

I chuckled and felt my mouth twitch up into a grin of my own. "If that's okay with you?" I asked playfully.

She leaned across the table to get closer to me. "Absolutely," she whispered, her eyes glittering.

I leaned across to reach her and pressed a quick kiss to her lips. "Good," I stated.

We sat back down and finished our meals. I was determined not to let Courtney put a damper on our evening. Santana was a little more withdrawn to start with, but as the evening went on she relaxed more. By the time we made it to the theater, she was back to her normal self.

The show was incredible. I had never imagined such an amazing spectacle, and Santana and I both made little exclamations of awe throughout the performance. Once it was over, we headed back to her car, both of us talking excitedly about what we had seen.

The high of our night seemed to carry on as we made our way back to my house. We kept chatting animatedly about the show and how great the night was and just about anything else in general. We purposely ignored our run in with Courtney, but even that didn't matter to me much anymore because of how much better the night had been.

Even though it was late, Santana came in to spend some more time with me. Neither of us bothered to change into anything else before we found ourselves on my couch making out desperately. Santana was stretched out on top of me, kissing me deeply. Her tongue was caressing mine and my heart was beating overtime to compensate for the lack of blood flow to my brain due to how amazing she was making me feel.

I was so incredibly turned on, as often happened when things got heated between us like this. I had been going through a lot of batteries with my little friend after nights I saw Santana, and I knew the lack of moving to the next level was frustrating Santana a little bit. I was just nervous about taking that step, for so many different reasons. Not the least of which was my lack of experience with sex in general.

Santana had been so patient with me. She never pushed me to go further than I was ready for, and anytime I asked her to stop, she did so. I knew she wanted to go further, and I wanted the same thing. I just needed more time, and thankfully she seemed like she was willing to give it.

At the moment, I wasn't thinking about any of that. One of my hands was buried in Santana's hair as we kissed, and the other was pressing against the small of her back, holding her body against me. I absolutely loved the feeling of her body on top of mine.

Santana pulled her mouth away from mine to trail kisses down my neck. She started sucking on my pulse point while one of her hands moved up to caress my breast over my dress. I moaned and arched up, pressing my boob into her hand and giving her even more access to my throat.

Santana's hips rocked down into mine as she squeezed my breast, pinching my hardened nipple between her fingers. She pulled her mouth away from my neck and I tilted my head back down. Her eyes were hooded and dark with lust, and I felt even more tingles shoot through my body. She brought her mouth crashing back to mine, and I eagerly parted my lips when her tongue asked for entrance.

Her hips started rocking a little more insistently against mine, and I could feel myself getting wetter as my arousal grew. I was so turned on I was aching, and I was nearly desperate for relief. Santana's hand trailed down from my breast, over my hip, and to the hem of my dress. She caressed my thigh and her hand started to creep up under my dress. My panic started to rise as her hand approached my upper thigh, and I pulled my mouth away from hers.

"San, wait," I protested, moving a hand down to stop hers from moving up any higher. She immediately stopped her hand and buried her face into my neck with a sigh. I felt so terrible for stopping her once again. "I'm sorry."

She pulled back to look at me, seeing the worry in my eyes. "It's okay, Brittany," she reassured me and I could tell she was being sincere. "You're not ready yet, and that's fine."

"Are you sure?" I asked hesitantly.

She nodded surely. "I promise," she said before she pressed a quick peck to my lips.

She removed her hand from my thigh and sat up. I followed her and rested my head against her shoulder. She wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pulling my body further into hers.

"It's not that I don't want to," I tried to explain, "Because I do. I _really_ do."

"I know, Britt," she said, then paused briefly. "Is it… I mean, is it because of Sam?"

"No," I replied. "Well, I mean, kind of I guess."

I felt Santana stiffen next to me and I realized how that could sound like I felt guilty about moving on from him. "It's not anything like that," I hastily reassured her as I pulled my head up and looked at her. "It's just that he was the only person I had ever been with… like, _ever_ … and I became comfortable with it, so I could do it. But this is all new and nobody else has ever seen me naked in that way before, and I don't even know if I'm any good at it because I didn't have a lot of experience. And I am just kind of scared."

I finished on a hush, and Santana looked at me softly, tucking a strand of hair that had broken loose from my bun while we were making out. "You know I think you're beautiful, right?"

I nodded, tears starting to pool in my eyes. "I do," I said honestly. "And when you say it, I truly feel like I am. But sex is totally different. It is so much more intimate and raw and you can't cover anything up…"

I trailed off, not really wanting to get into a discussion about how I felt about my flaws. Santana shook her head slightly. "Sweetie, you could never be anything but beautiful to me," she said sincerely. "I don't care about any scars or imperfections you think you have. You are beautiful, and sexy, and I desperately want to show you how much I think so. But when you're ready, okay?"

I nodded, giving her a grateful smile. "Thank you," I whispered. I wanted to tell her it was more than just that, but I was scared about that, too. I was so inexperienced with sex. Sam and I had an okay sex life. It felt good and I was able to get off sometimes, but I felt like it could have been better. I didn't know if it was because we had gotten together so young and didn't get to learn a lot by not being with other people, or if we were just not that good together, or if it was something wrong with me. I was really scared that it was something I did wrong.

"Um," she said nervously, drawing my attention back to her. She licked her lips and glanced down at her lap. "Do you- do you, like, think that maybe Courtney was right?"

My brows shot together and I frowned. "What do you mean?" I asked, hoping she wasn't asking what I thought she was.

"Like, that maybe… maybe I'm not good in bed," she said quietly.

I felt a surge of anger toward Santana's stupid ex, but I pushed it aside so I could concentrate on reassuring the beautiful woman in front of me that there was absolutely nothing wrong with her.

"Santana, look at me," I told her. She looked up to meet my eyes, and I hated to see the trepidation there. "Don't listen to that bitch. She has no idea what she's talking about. And if how I feel when we make out is any indication of how you will be in bed when we do get there, I can honestly say that you have absolutely nothing to worry about."

She bit her lip as the corners of her mouth twitched. "Yeah?" Santana asked, her voice low. "And how do I make you feel?"

I felt the start of a blush tinge my cheeks, but I smirked a little. "You have no idea how turned on you make me. Let's just say that after we say goodnight to each other, I have to spend some time 'thinking' about you. Sometimes more than once," I told her, my own voice husky.

"Are you saying you get yourself off fantasizing about me after we make out?" Santana asked teasingly, her eyes sparkling.

I rolled my eyes as my blush deepened. "Yes," I answered. "Don't you?"

She grinned. "Of course," she replied. "But it is still fucking hot to know that you do it."

I giggled. "Good to know."

Santana looked over at the clock and saw how late it was. "I should probably head home," she said reluctantly.

I pouted, grabbing her arm to hold her on the couch. "No, stay the night with me," I said.

"Um," she said, looking at me with a little surprise.

"No, I mean, just sleep here," I corrected, realizing how my initial request sounded.

Santana smiled sweetly at me and nodded. "Okay."

We let the dogs out one final time and then started walking down the hall. I made a quick stop in the main bathroom to grab her toothbrush, and she gave me a strange look.

"What are you doing?"

"Taking your toothbrush to my bathroom," I said, and watched as realization dawned. "You didn't think I was going to make you sleep in the guest room, did you?"

"I didn't want to assume," she said a little sheepishly. I was honestly a bit surprised that she would think that I would sleep in a bed without her now that we were dating. As much as we cuddled and everything, I wouldn't get any sleep knowing that she was in a different room and not by my side.

"I want you next to me," I confessed. "Even if we don't do anything, I just want to feel your body next to mine."

She smiled and didn't offer another protest as I led the way to my room. I gave her a set of pajamas and we both got ready for bed. I changed in the bathroom, not ready to expose that much of myself yet. After we had brushed our teeth, washed our faces, and changed into pajamas, we climbed into bed.

We settled under the covers facing each other. I couldn't resist caressing her cheek. She leaned into my touch, and I leaned forward and started kissing her. I quickly deepened it, asking for entrance to her mouth with my tongue. Her lips parted and I took advantage, caressing her tongue with mine.

Things started to heat up again, and I found myself laying partially on her as we kissed. She grunted into my mouth and tensed a little, and I could tell it wasn't a pleasant reaction.

"You okay?" I asked breathlessly as I pulled back a little.

"Yeah, I just think your cat is trying to kill me," she said, her voice a little strained.

I gave her a confused look briefly before I turned to see Lord Tubbington on Santana's stomach.

"Lord Tubbington, get off of her," I scolded, shooing him away. He gave me a dirty look before he got off of Santana and moved to the foot of the bed to lie down.

Santana gave a relieved sigh at the removal of the cat's hefty weight. "Thanks," she told me.

"Sorry," I apologized. "I know he is pretty heavy, but I'm used to it. If it makes any difference, he only lays on people he likes."

She giggled. "Well I'm glad he likes me, but I'd prefer if he didn't show it by trying to crush me," she said, amused.

"I'll tell him that," I said, smiling. "We should probably get some sleep though."

She nodded and then pulled me back in for one final, lingering kiss. We settled down in the bed, and I wrapped my arms around her as she burrowed her head under my chin. I fell asleep quickly.

The next thing I knew, I was waking up to a hint of morning light in the room. I could tell it was still early because my alarm hadn't gone off yet, but it couldn't be much longer before it did. Santana was facing away from me, but I was curled around her body with my arm wrapped around her. My face buried into her hair and I inhaled her delicious scent. I placed a light kiss to the back of her neck and just pulled away when my alarm went off.

Santana jerked at the noise, and I couldn't help but giggle. "What the fuck? Is that your alarm?" Santana asked groggily.

"Yeah, sorry," I said as I rolled over and turned it off. I took my pill quickly and rolled back over to find Santana had flopped over onto her back.

"I fucking hate your alarm," she mumbled grumpily.

I grinned at how completely adorable she was, her lips in a pout and a slight crease between her eyes at the irritation she felt from being so rudely awoken.

"You are so fucking cute," I gushed, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her into me in a tight hug.

Santana grumbled into my chest. I pulled back and gave her a firm kiss. "I need to go take care of the beasts, but I will be right back," I told her.

"Okay," she replied sleepily.

I got out of bed and let the dogs out. Once they had come back inside, I went to the kitchen and fed both of them and the cat. I made my way back to my room, looking forward to getting back in bed and cuddling up with Santana.

Once I got there, I realized that she had fallen back asleep. I smiled as I cuddled up to her, brushing some hair out of her face. She didn't stir.

"San?" I whispered. Still no response.

I pressed a kiss to her forehead. "You awake?" I hushed, and she still didn't move.

I sighed. "You have no idea what you do to me," I whispered, looking at her sleeping face. She was so beautiful. "You can make me feel like I'm ten feet tall and strong, but also like I'm some delicate thing you need to take care of. You make my heart race and my breath stop, but also make me feel the most calm and content I can ever remember being. You make me want to do nothing but hold you in my arms, but also make me want to see you fall apart beneath me. You make me so, so happy Santana. I think…"

 _I think I'm falling in love with you_ , I thought. That's what I wanted to say, but the words stuck in my throat. I was too scared to say that, even if Santana was asleep. It was too early for that, right? "I think you're perfect," I whispered instead.

I pressed another kiss to her forehead and settled into her, wrapping my arm around her body to hold her. Having her in my arms was enough to relax me and fall right back asleep.

 **A/N: Looks like they are getting a lot more comfortable with each other! And Santana seemed a little weird about that flower she gave Brittany. I wonder what that was all about? A month already has gone by and it appears they are taking it slow. It seems like Brittany really wants to move to the next level, but she has some insecurities. Santana is more than willing to work through everything and reassure her, but maybe (definitely) she has some insecurities of her own?**

 **We had another appearance from Heinous Bitch #1 (although I don't plan on there being a Heinous Bitch #2, but I think Courtney more than deserves that title). How amazing was Brittany standing up for Santana (and herself) again? Do you think Santana found that hot? I think Santana found that hot... maybe that's why their make-out session was so intense that night.**

 **What do you guys think of Brittany's little revelation at the end? Are things heading into serious territory soon? They haven't had sex yet, so I wonder if they will do that before they start making things pretty serious. Let me know your thoughts! I love hearing them!**

 **So I am pretty much back to normal. Well, not that I was ever** ** _normal_** **but normal for myself at least. I actually was able to work out today, which was awesome, and I have stopped coughing and I don't have that exhaustion anymore, yay! Thanks again to everyone for your well wishes, and I am super happy to be on the mend, although I realized today that I still have blue nail polish on my toenails and my fingernails are painted pink. I may have to do something about that.**

 **Now you all are probably sitting there like 'why is this crazy chick rambling on?' I am just so excited that the weekend is finally here since it has been a really long week at work, especially with being sick. I can't wait to curl up with a good book and maybe some hot chocolate and hopefully watch The Wiz from last night that I couldn't stay up and watch. Thank you all for being amazing readers and reviewers and just everything :)**


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

I did a lot of thinking after my revelation. I had never felt the way I was feeling with Santana before. Not even with Sam.

That thought made me feel a little guilty. I tried to push it aside, because I knew Sam would want me to be happy. And Santana definitely made me happy.

I loved Sam a lot. But he had never made my heart race when I saw him. He hadn't made my body tingle with a simple touch. And he hadn't turned me on with just a look.

Santana did all of those things to me and more. It made me wonder if I had ever really been _in love_ with Sam. I had definitely loved him, and we had a connection that would last forever. He had been my best friend, my confidant, my husband, and my partner. I had been content in my life with him, and I would have stayed married to him forever if the accident hadn't happened.

I wondered if it was a comfort thing. Sam had been all I had ever known, and he was sweet and kind and caring and loved me. So I stayed with him, and I never knew there was anything better out there. But now there was Santana, and I knew that there was so much more.

I was a firm believer that things happened for a reason. I definitely felt that Sam had been in my life for a reason, and that reason was to make me the person I was today. Because that person was one that was meant to meet Santana and fall in love with her. I felt that Santana and I had to go through the things that we did so we could meet each other, even though they were horrible and I wished they hadn't have happened. We were destined for each other.

At least that's how I felt. I had no clue if Santana felt the same. I hoped she was falling for me the way I was for her. I never wanted to lose the way she made me feel, because it was the best feeling in the world.

Santana's birthday was in mid-June. I wanted to do something really special for her, like she had done for my birthday. I was in a bit of a panic to try to come up with something. So many thoughts flew around my head as to what I could do for her and what to give her as a present.

I asked Santana what she wanted as a gift, and she told me that whatever I got her she would love. So that was no help.

I talked to Gabe and asked what he thought I should give her. He said he usually just took her out to party and gave her some earrings or other jewelry. That gave me a little help, but I didn't want to do the same things her brother did.

I ended up talking to Gus about what I should do.

"I just want to do something special," I explained to my coworker and now friend.

"Is there anything you can think of that would tell Santana what she means to you? Like any sort of special moment you guys had that you could recreate or you could buy something that would represent it?" Gus asked.

I nodded thoughtfully. "There are several things, but I am not really sure which one to pick."

"It doesn't necessarily matter which one you pick," he explained. "If it is something that Santana will recognize as a special moment you had, then that's what matters."

I smiled gratefully at him. "Thanks, Gus. You've been a great help."

"Always here to help, Brittany," he told me with a kind smile.

I now had some more concrete ideas to work with. Santana's birthday was on a Friday, so I planned on celebrating with her that evening. I coordinated with Gabe so that he would do his usual celebration with her on Saturday (with me tagging along of course) so Santana would be free on her actual birthday.

I purchased the gifts I wanted to get her and made plans for our evening. I knew I wanted to make the night special. And I had figured out how I wanted to do it. The thought made me nervous, but I wanted to show Santana how much she meant to me.

I told Santana that we were going to have a quiet celebration at my house Friday night, and we would have a real celebration Saturday so she should spend the night at my place so she wouldn't be driving back and forth. She said that was fine, and so my plans were set.

I wanted to call the morning of Santana's birthday and wish her a happy birthday, but she slept later than I did and I didn't want to disturb her sleep. So I settled for sending her a text.

 _Happy 26_ _th_ _birthday baby! Have a wonderful day and I can't wait to see you tonight to celebrate! Call me later if you can. XX- Britt_

Santana had replied on my way to work and I checked it once I had pulled into my parking space.

 _Thanks babe :). I can't wait for tonight either. I've missed being in your arms. XO- Santana_

I grinned at her text and replied with a smiley face before I headed into work. I could not concentrate on anything all morning. Thankfully Gus knew what today was since I had been talking about it practically non-stop to him all week, so he just smiled knowingly at me and went about his day.

Santana called me around lunchtime.

"Happy birthday baby!" I greeted as I answered.

Santana giggled. "Thanks Britt," she said.

"So how has your day been, birthday girl?" I asked, my mood chipper.

"Better now that I am talking to you," she said, and I could hear a little exasperation in her voice.

"What's the matter, San?"

"Some idiot fucking opened his mouth when he shouldn't have and now I have to do cleanup duty," she explained, frustrated. "I'm so sorry, Britt, but I am going to be a little late tonight."

My heart sunk a little in disappointment, but I knew it wasn't her fault. "It's okay," I reassured her. "You are still coming though, right?"

"Yes! I will absolutely be there. I just can't make it by 6:30. I should be able to be there by 7 though, if that's okay?"

"Whenever you show up will be fine," I told her. "I just want to see you tonight."

"I need to see you tonight, babe," Santana confessed. "Even if it is midnight, I promise I will show up."

"I hope it isn't midnight, because then it wouldn't be your birthday anymore," I pouted.

"I will make sure it isn't midnight then," she promised. "But I should probably go and get back to work so I can get out of here at a decent time."

"Okay. I will see you later. And try not to kill anyone on your birthday!"

"I can't make any promises," she chuckled.

We said our goodbyes and disconnected the call. I was definitely disappointed that she would be late, but I was still going to be able to see her. My plans weren't ruined or anything. I just needed to push dinner back a little, and everything else should work out fine.

Once work was over, I headed over to Kyle's bakery to pick up dessert for the night. I had met Kyle officially several weeks before when Santana had taken me into his shop to pick up some goodies for us. He was a pleasant man, and he was glad to meet me. Apparently Santana had told him a lot about me. I had stopped by earlier in the week to tell him what I wanted, and he happily agreed.

When I walked into the bakery he was behind the counter. He grinned when he saw me and immediately went to the back to grab my order. He showed me what was inside and I smiled in approval. He refused to let me pay, saying that I should consider it his birthday present to Santana. I thanked him profusely and headed home with my goodies.

I started to get ready when I got home. I let the dogs out and then showered. I put on some shorts and a tank top so I could start cooking. Once things could be left for a few minutes, I went to finish getting ready. Tonight wasn't supposed to be fancy, so I dressed in skinny jeans and a loose flowery sleeveless shirt. I dried my hair and left it loose, and applied some light make-up.

Santana texted me around 6:15 to tell me that she was leaving work. She had to stop by her place really quick to grab her bag, but then she would be on her way. That meant she should be here by 7 o'clock, which worked perfectly. I finished up dinner and set the table, then fed the dogs and the cat.

I set Santana's gifts in the living room on the coffee table so they were easily accessible once we made it there. I heard a knock on the door shortly before 7, and I couldn't contain my giddy excitement. I practically skipped to the door and pulled it open to reveal Santana.

She was grinning at me, still dressed in her tailored trousers, blouse, and blazer from work. Her hair was pulled back in a clip, and she looked fucking incredible.

"God, you're sexy," I blurted, feeling my cheeks heat up a little at just spitting that out.

She laughed and I pulled her into the house and immediately started kissing her as the door closed. She moaned into my mouth at the heated kiss and wrapped her arms around my neck as mine went around her waist. I realized things were getting a little out of hand, and dinner was waiting on us. I reluctantly broke the kiss, pulling my head back enough to look at her.

"Happy birthday, Tana," I said with a grin.

"Now my birthday is definitely happy," she smirked.

"Do you want to change before dinner?" I asked, leaning my forehead against hers.

"Well, I don't know," she teased. "If this outfit gets me a reaction like that, I might just want to stay in it forever."

I giggled. "You could be wearing a potato sack and would still get a reaction like that from me," I told her.

"I'll keep that in mind," she said, smiling. "But I guess I will change."

I nodded. "Okay."

"By the way, it smells really good in here," she said, giving me a suspicious look.

I bit my lip, fighting off a smile. I didn't want to give anything away. "Go get changed," I demanded softly.

I let her out of my arms and she took her things back to my bedroom to change. She greeted the dogs as she went down the hallway, and I heard her say hi to Lord Tubbington when she got in the bedroom. I went to the kitchen to wait for her. It was only a few minutes when she came back dressed in tight fitting jeans and a dark blue top, her hair now down and loose over her shoulders. I loved her hair down, mostly because I loved being able to bury my fingers in it. I tore my thoughts away from that and smiled as she looked at the table.

"You made the same dinner you made the first time I came over," she said softly. She had a small smile on her face and her eyes looked tender as she took in the spaghetti and meatballs with breadsticks on the table.

"Yep," I told her happily, loving her reaction to seeing the special dinner. "The first time you came over here, I was so nervous because I already was into you so much. I had to keep telling myself that it wasn't a date, no matter how much I wanted it to be. And you put me at ease when you told me how much you loved the food. That was the night that we started to become really close, and I hoped to show you how special it was."

"It's perfect, Brittany," she said, coming over to me. She tucked my hair behind my hair before pulling my head down for a gentle kiss. "Thank you."

I nodded and led her over to the table to sit down. "Did you want a glass of wine?"

"If you don't mind," she said. "Work was kind of hell and I would love to wind down a bit."

I smiled knowingly and opened the bottle of red wine I had bought for her. I poured her a glass and brought it over to her. She thanked me and I sat down in my own chair.

Dinner went off without a hitch. Santana gushed over the food, as usual, and devoured several breadsticks. I kept telling her to save room for dessert, and she just rolled her eyes at me. She told me about her day at work, and I felt bad that she had to deal with that kind of stress on her birthday.

As we cleared our plates, I started to get a little nervous. I put our dishes in the dishwasher, and Santana helped me to put the leftovers away. I knew she would argue with me if I protested, so I just let her help. Once we were finished, I grabbed the bakery box off the top of the fridge where I had hidden it.

Santana grinned at the box. "Brownies?"

I smiled a little nervously but shook my head. I headed to the table and Santana followed. I indicated for Santana to sit down, and she did. I set the box on the table, but didn't sit down. "I know we had brownies last time, but I wanted to do something different," I explained. "The first day we met, you made sure my birthday was special by getting me, a complete stranger, cupcakes to celebrate."

Santana's face softened as she looked at me in understanding. "That meant more to me than you could ever imagine, and I wanted to return the favor," I said, pausing a little as my nerves got to me. I licked my lips and took a breath. "I don't really know how these things work, and I'm really bad at knowing what to do with something like this, but…"

I trailed off, and Santana gave me a confused look. Instead of explaining, I opened the box. She looked down, her brows still furrowed in confusion. Then her face smoothed and slowly her mouth turned up into a wide smile and her eyes sparkled. My heart was pounding and I fought to stop my hands from shaking.

Inside the box were six cupcakes, much like what Santana had gotten for me for my birthday. Only I had talked to Kyle and he put in a variety of Santana's favorites, from vanilla with strawberry icing to chocolate and mocha. Each cupcake had something a little different though. On top of each cupcake was a single word. They said "Be my girlfriend? Yes or No."

I held my breath as Santana's hand reached toward the box. She hovered her hand over the cupcake that said 'or' and I started to panic a little. Then she reached down and picked up the cupcake that said 'yes', and I let out a relieved sigh, a grin spreading over my face.

"Yes?" I asked for confirmation.

She nodded, grinning at me. "I kind of hoped I already was," she confessed.

"I hoped so, too," I said in a rush. "I just wasn't sure because I'm not good with relationship stuff and I just didn't want to assume."

Santana stood up, setting her cupcake down, and pulled me to her. "Brittany," she said, getting my attention. "This evening just proves that you are great at relationship stuff. Everything is perfect, and I would absolutely love to call you my girlfriend."

"I would love that, too," I breathed out, finally calming.

"Good," she said softly and leaned up to give me another soft kiss. I relaxed into her and kissed back.

"Let's eat your birthday cupcakes," I said when we pulled apart. I selected the cupcake that said 'girlfriend' happily, and Santana giggled at my choice.

We ate our treats and then I closed the box and put it back on top of the refrigerator so the dogs wouldn't try to get at them. They were usually pretty good about leaving food alone on the counters, but Lady had a bit of a sweet tooth and if I left the cupcakes on the counter then it was likely she would try to get them off. Since there was a lot of chocolate in that box, I needed to make sure she didn't get at them.

"So what's your plans for the rest of the night, babe?" Santana asked when we were done.

"It's present time," I told her with a smile before I led her into the living room.

Her gift was small and wasn't too noticeable on the coffee table. We sat down on the couch and I handed her the card I got for her.

The corners of Santana's mouth were turned up slightly as she took the card and read it. It wasn't anything too special, just a little note to wish her a happy birthday. Inside the card was the first part of her gift.

"A gift card to Barnes & Noble, nice!" Santana said, a genuine smile on her face. "Thank you!"

I chuckled. "There's $100 on there, so I figure that could get you a few books," I informed her.

Her eyes widened a little. "$100? Seriously Britt, that's a lot of money," she said.

I shrugged. "I wanted to make sure you got what books you wanted, and I know they can be expensive."

She shook her head a little in wonder. "You are something else, you know that? Thank you so much," she said as she leaned in for a kiss.

I happily obliged and pressed my lips against hers. I don't think I would ever get tired of kissing Santana. Her lips felt so good against mine. They were so soft and gentle, yet they could be firm and demanding in a thrilling way. I kept this kiss brief though, and pulled back to hand her the small wrapped box on the table.

"You didn't need to get me something else after that," Santana protested.

"Yes I did," I stated. "This is the bigger gift anyways."

Santana couldn't fight off a smile and she pulled the wrapping paper off of the small box. Her brow furrowed a little as she pulled the lid off of the box to reveal a felted jewelry box. She took that out and opened it to reveal a silver charm bracelet with several charms on it.

"Brittany," she breathed. "It's beautiful, but it's too much."

"No it's not," I told her. "Here, let me explain it."

I pulled the bracelet out so I could show her the charms. "I got you a book charm because of how much you love books, obviously." Santana smiled as she listened. "But it also represents how smart you are and how much I admire that. The paw print is a little different. I got that because of how sweet you are to my animals, which is awesome of you. But I also got it to represent the time we went to the zoo and how amazing of a day that was. Not to mention that was the day we admitted we had feelings for each other."

Santana was giving me a sweet smile then, her eyes looking at me so tenderly. "The last one, the flower charm… this one is the most important I think. I am not really knowledgeable about flowers. I know they are pretty, but that's about it." I could see a hint of amusement in her eyes as I said this, but I wasn't sure what it was about so I kept on talking. "I got this because it made me feel really special when you gave me flowers before. And I also got it because I never bought flowers for someone before, and I wouldn't even know what to get you. So I thought I could buy you this flower so it would be with you always and never fade and die."

"I think this is the best birthday present I've ever gotten," Santana hushed, her voice thick with emotion. "I love it. It's absolutely perfect."

I grinned, relieved that she liked it. "Can I put it on you?" I asked quietly.

She nodded and I clasped the bracelet around her wrist. She touched it gently after I put it on, and then she pulled me into a tight hug. "You've made this a really great birthday," she said, tucking her face into my neck.

I squeezed her into me. "And it's not even over yet," I told her teasingly.

"Oh my God, don't tell me there's more," she groaned good-naturedly as she pulled back.

"There's one more thing," I told her nervously.

This wasn't exactly the timing I had planned. I had planned on relaxing for a bit on the couch and maybe watching a movie, but it didn't appear that I was going to follow that plan.

"You really didn't need to do anything else," Santana said, half-heartedly protesting.

"I do," I said as I stood up. I held my hands out to her and she put her hands in mine. I pulled her off of the couch and led her down the hallway.

Once we got into my bedroom, I turned to face her. She was looking at me in confusion.

"Britt, what's going on?" Santana asked hesitantly.

"I'm giving you your final present," I told her, my voice shaking with nerves.

Her brow furrowed even further at my lack of explanation. I reached down to the hem of my shirt and pulled it up over my head, dropping it to the floor. Santana's eyes widened and her jaw dropped in surprise.

"Brittany," she breathed, her eyes trailing over my body before coming up to meet mine. I forced myself to keep my hands at my side, letting her look. "Are you sure about this?"

I nodded. I was so fucking nervous, but I knew I was ready. We were ready. "Yeah," I told her. "I want to give you everything."

Santana's eyes darkened with desire and she wet her lips. She stepped closer to me and brought her hands up to cup my face, caressing my cheeks with her thumbs as she brought me down for our mouths to meet. I breathed shakily into the kiss as I settled my hands on her hips and pulled her body into mine.

Santana's left hand trailed down from my face to my side, where she ran it up and down lightly before she moved it around to my back. She brought her other hand around to join it and unclasp my bra. I let the straps fall down my shoulders and the garment fell to the floor. We didn't interrupt our kiss, which had deepened.

She moved her hands around to rest on my sides, caressing her thumbs lightly over my ribs. My tongue danced with hers, and I wanted to take things further. I pulled at the bottom of her shirt, trying to tug it up. We broke the kiss so I could pull the top over her head and it joined the other clothes on the floor.

Santana's hands went down to my jeans as our mouths came back together and she unbuttoned them and drew the zipper down. I nervously helped her to pull the pants and my lacy panties down. I kicked them off and Santana stepped back to look at me.

Her eyes trailed over my body, and my arms automatically came up to try to cover my chest. I was insecure about my body. Santana was definitely in shape, as evidenced by her toned stomach that I had seen when I walked in on her months ago. My myasthenia gravis had made me too weak to work out that hard, so my body wasn't as fit as hers. My stomach was flat but no longer had the definition I had when I was younger. My hips were rounded a little bit. I tried to keep in shape with a little exercise and watching what I ate, but I would never look the way she did again. My biggest insecurity, however, was the long scar running down between my breasts from my surgery to remove my thymus gland. That's what I was trying to cover.

She frowned a little at my action and stepped toward me again. She took my wrists gently in her hands and pulled my arms away from my chest. She leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the scar between my breasts, making my breath catch. Her thumbs rubbed the insides of my wrists as she kissed my breastbone again. I feared she could feel my heart pounding through it.

Santana pulled back a little bit, her eyes dancing over my torso again before she looked back up to my eyes. "You are so beautiful," she whispered sincerely. My eyes watered a little as I felt how much she meant that.

"I need to see you," I told her almost desperately.

I reached for her jeans and worked on unbuttoning them. Santana helped me to remove her clothes since my hands were still a little shaky. Soon, she was standing before me completely bare and my eyes were taking in her beautiful body.

"You are the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen," I said, honesty and awe dripping from my voice. I was incredibly aroused and the sight of her naked body was making my heart race.

Santana stepped into me quickly and brought her mouth crashing to mine as our bare bodies came together. I moaned at the contact and my hands buried in her hair. I wanted to touch every part of her, but I was nervous.

"Santana," I said breathlessly as she started to suck on my neck. "I- I want more."

"Okay," she murmured into my skin.

"I don't know what to do," I confessed nervously.

Santana's mouth stilled against my neck and she pulled back to look at me. I could see the lust in her eyes, but also the tenderness she had for me. "Do you want me to go first?" Her voice was gentle with the question.

I nodded, swallowing hard.

"Okay," she said before she walked me over to the bed.

We climbed onto my bed and I settled back on the pillows. Santana lay her body on top of mine and I groaned at the feeling. Her eyes shut and she inhaled sharply.

"You feel so good, babe," she whispered huskily.

"So do you," I groaned and pulled her down for another hungry kiss.

Santana's mouth eagerly reciprocated at first before she slowed it down. Her lips caressed mine slowly before she moved down to my ear. "Can I touch you?"

Her whisper in my ear caused a shiver to run through me. I nodded quickly and she brought her hand up to my stomach, running it lightly over my skin before she cupped my breast. Her mouth began to kiss and suck on my neck as she squeezed and massaged my breast and I moaned.

She continued with this for several minutes, alternating breasts. She had moved her mouth down and started to kiss and suck on my nipples. My hips started rocking up and hers were starting to grind down a little into me. Santana's mouth came back up to mine to kiss me deeply as her left hand trailed down my body.

I felt her fingers caress the inside of my thigh. I thought about stopping her for a moment. I was feeling so incredibly good, but I was getting a little nervous again. Not about having sex with her, but about me.

I had never come before with fingers. I had never even come with my own fingers before. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to with Santana, but I didn't want to stop her. I felt more turned on than I ever had, and I was desperate for her touch. So I didn't say anything.

I gasped as her fingers dipped into my wetness, separating my folds. She groaned a little at what she found and I moaned as her fingers found my clit and started to rub it. It felt so, so good. She slid a finger gently inside of me and my fingers clenched on her shoulders. Her mouth was working on my neck again, and she thrust in and out a couple of times before she entered me with a second finger.

I was panting. She used her thumb to massage my clit as she kept up a steady pace with her fingers inside of me. I didn't know what she did, but suddenly she hit a spot inside of me that made me gasp and moan loudly. She kept hitting that spot and massaging my clit.

I was lost in sensation. Her mouth on my neck combined with the feeling of her bare body against mine and her scent in my nostrils with what she was doing to my body started to overwhelm me. I couldn't think about anything but what I was feeling. I was moaning breathily when I felt the first coils tighten in my lower belly.

"Oh God San, I'm gonna come," I moaned a little in surprise.

I barely noticed her mouth move away from my neck as she pulled back to watch me. Everything started to crash over me and my mind blanked as I climaxed. Santana kept up her motions to help me ride out my orgasm. Once I started to come down I started to be able to breathe again. My body relaxed, satiated, and Santana stopped moving her hand.

I took in a shaky breath and looked up to see her looking at me, a gentle look in her eyes mixed with a lot of lust. A feeling of love crashed over me and I wrapped my arms around her neck and pulled her down into me tightly. She slipped her hand out of me and wrapped her own arms around my body.

I knew now that I was in love with her. There was no more falling. I had fallen, and I had fallen long ago. Maybe even before I realized that I was falling for her. This was how it was supposed to feel. I knew that now. I was afraid to blurt it out, because it was way too soon for that.

"You okay?" Santana asked gently.

I nodded enthusiastically against her shoulder. "Yes," I said, my voice thick. "Oh my God, yes. That was… You were…"

I didn't even have words. Santana chuckled and I moved my hands to cup the sides of her head and pull her face towards mine in a firm kiss. I kissed her several times before I stopped and just looked up at her in awe.

"Glad you liked it," she said with a little smirk.

"Santana, you have no idea," I told her, my eyes starting to tear up a little. "I've never… I mean… I haven't ever…"

I trailed off, unable to find the right words to explain. Santana's eyes widened incredulously. "You haven't ever? Like ever? I mean, not even with Sam?"

I looked at her confused for a moment before I realized what she thought I mean. "No, I've come before," I explained before averting my eyes in embarrassment. "I've never came with anyone's hand before."

"What?" Santana asked, surprised. "Not even by yourself?" I shook my head. "Then how did you… you know… take care of yourself?"

"I don't think I ever knew how to proper way to do it, so I used a vibrator," I confessed, my face burning with embarrassment.

"There's nothing wrong with that," Santana said gently.

I looked back at her, worried. "But there kind of is," I said fearfully. "If I can't even do it to myself, how can I make you feel good?"

She smiled reassuringly at me. "I can help you," she told me. "I can tell you what I like. I promise you will make me feel good."

"Okay," I whispered hesitantly. "Can I try?"

She grinned, her eyes sparkling, and nodded. I gently rolled her over and laid myself on top of her. I loved the feeling of her body on top of mine, but I think I now loved the feeling of her beneath me more.

I started to kiss her and she eagerly kissed back. "Can I touch you?" I asked nervously.

"You can explore my body any way you want, babe," she told me.

I took her at her word. I pulled back and sat up, straddling her thighs. I massaged her breasts, making her writhe in pleasure beneath me. I loved watching what I was doing and her reactions to it. I ran my hands over her body before I leaned back down and took her mouth with mine.

I eventually made my hand go between her thighs. Her arousal surprised me and turned me on. Santana helped to guide my touches, and I watched her face to see what made her feel good. I tentatively dipped one finger inside her, delighting in the feeling of her enveloping it, and she moaned in appreciation before telling me to add another. I thrust in and out of her with two fingers and she didn't even have to ask me to use my thumb to rub against her clit. She directed me to curl my fingers and I discovered the spot inside of her that made her moan really loud and shudder.

She told me to kiss her again and I obliged. I started to feel her walls tighten around my fingers as her hips rocked into my hand. She told me she was close and demanded that I not stop, so I didn't. I pulled my head back to watch her come apart in my arms.

It was the sexiest thing I had ever seen before in my life. She moaned and whimpered out her release as her body tensed and her walls clenched rhythmically around my fingers. I kept up the movements with my hand, keeping my word not to stop. Once she took a shaky breath and started to relax, I stilled my hand before slipping it out of her gently.

She pulled me to her and kissed me deeply. "That was amazing, Brittany," she said against my mouth. "Best birthday ever."

I grinned and then kissed her tenderly for several minutes before I pulled back.

"I'll be back in a minute," I promised. I threw on a shirt and panties off the floor, not even paying attention to whose they were, and headed out to the living room to let the dogs out one final time. Once they came back in, I turned out the lights and headed back into the bedroom where I took my pill, removed the clothing I had put on, and climbed back into bed. We burrowed under the covers and I took Santana back into my arms and we fell asleep wrapped up in each other.

My alarm startled me out of a deep sleep the next morning and I hurriedly rolled over to turn it off. I took my pill as Santana groaned.

"I really don't like waking up like that, babe," she rasped.

"Sorry," I apologized as I rolled back over and spooned Santana's bare body. God, she felt so good against me.

I moved her hair away from her neck and started pressing kisses down it to her shoulder as I wrapped my arm around her and let my fingers dance over her taut abdomen. She sucked in a breath as she shivered.

"What about the dogs?" Santana asked, her voice low with a hint of desire.

"They can wait," I husked. "I need you."

She giggled as my hand dipped teasingly lower on her belly. "Damn Britt, have I already created a sex monster?" Santana teased.

"It's a possibility," I whispered into her ear as my fingers slipped into her wet folds.

Santana moaned and spread her legs for me. "Mmm, you're a quick learner," she breathed. I murmured an agreement. "Fuck, Brittany."

"Is that what you want, Tana? You want me to fuck you?" I asked.

"Yeah," she panted.

I rolled her onto her back and swiftly entered her with two fingers. She groaned loudly and threw her head back. I proceeded to do as she had asked me. It was the best morning I ever had.

 **A/N: Birthday sex! So Brittany finally got over her reservations and gave herself completely to Santana. I think she liked it... do you think she did? ;)**

 **I think Santana was incredibly glad that Brittany finally became comfortable enough to take their relationship to the next level. Not only with Brittany asking her to be her girlfriend, but also by them having sex for the first time. Were you guys surprised that Brittany asked Santana to be her girlfriend and that Santana didn't initiate that conversation? What about Brittany taking the initiative to become intimate? I think we all knew Brittany was in love with Santana already, but at least she finally figured it out! How long do you think it will take them to admit it to each other? Who do you think will cave first this time? What do you guys think about Brittany's thoughts of her relationship with Sam vs. her relationship with Santana?**

 **I definitely wouldn't have been upset with that birthday if I were Santana. I'm sorry about the cliche charm bracelet, but I wanted something meaningful for Brittany to give her and I am horrible at coming up with present ideas. Which is probably why my present shopping this afternoon went atrociously...**

 **So I have a confession to make. I got really burned out with writing. I spent like every moment of my free time writing for about six months, and after I finished this story I wrote a short piece that goes along with it and I just stopped writing for awhile. I was tired and I wanted a break, and I honestly didn't know if I was going to be writing again. But once I started posting this story and seeing the amazing reaction it has gotten, I have become pretty enthused. So this past weekend I started writing again! I have so many ideas in my head, and I'm not sure exactly how many things I am going to get into words, but I guarantee that I will have new things for you all to read. So thank you all for your support and encouragement!**

 **I can't wait to hear your thoughts about this chapter! And Happy Hanukkah!**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Sex with Santana was amazing. I was no longer nervous or insecure about it with her. She made me feel incredible, and I could tell that I made her feel great too. I learned so much about Santana's body by observing her when I touched her and made mental notes of what she loved and what didn't work so well for her. She continued to guide me the first few times, but after that I had learned more than plenty to make her come hard without her assistance.

I also learned a lot about myself. Not only did Santana's touching me teach me what I liked, it helped me learn how to touch myself so that I didn't have to go through so many batteries when I couldn't see my girlfriend.

My sex drive definitely increased with Santana. Sex with Sam was nothing like sex with her. I could never get enough of Santana. This was the way I was supposed to feel about the person I loved. I wanted to touch her constantly. I wanted to make her come in so many different ways and kiss and caress every inch of her body. I wanted everything with her, and she made me feel so comfortable that I had no qualms about expressing my interest to her.

She expanded my sexual experience too. Not only because I finally had sex with a woman, but we started to do things I had never done before. We had sex in the bathtub after I tried to help Santana relax after a stressful day at work. We had sex in the kitchen when Santana came up behind me while I was doing dishes and proceeded to undo my pants and take me from behind against the kitchen counter. We had phone sex on the nights we couldn't spend together because could go a day without thinking of the other like that.

Santana never pushed me to do anything different. She was patient with me since she knew how nervous I had been before, and would gently suggest things that I eagerly agreed to. I loved looking forward to how much more I would get to experience and learn with her.

The one thing we hadn't done, however, was go down on each other yet. I really wanted to do it. I wanted to taste her and make her come with my mouth. And the times that Sam went down on me, which wasn't that often, were really good. So I couldn't wait for Santana to do it, because I knew it would be so much better with her.

The thing was that Santana hadn't brought it up. I was hesitant to mention anything because I wasn't sure if it was something that she liked to do. I figured she would have said something already since it had been weeks since we first started sleeping together. We always made an effort to see each other several times a week, and if she didn't stay at my house on the weekend then I boarded the dogs and stayed at hers. There were plenty of opportunities for her to initiate it, but she didn't.

I was starting to get frustrated by it because it was something I thought about a lot and was incredibly turned on by. I decided that if she didn't mention anything soon then I would try to go down on her and see what happened.

Santana had sent me a single red rose the Monday after the weekend we first made love. I believed that our first time was making love because I was in love with her, and it felt like it to me. Our two month anniversary passed with a quieter celebration. Santana gave me two red roses on the day and we went out to dinner and had a quiet night in where we showed each other how much we felt about one another several times.

Early in July Gabe informed us that he had been traded. He was now going to be playing for Nashville. Santana was upset at the fact that her brother would be moving away. I was sad too, since I was going to be far away from a good friend.

Gabe's friends were throwing him a going away party and we were invited. It was out at a club on a Saturday night and several of his Blue Jackets teammates were there. He introduced us, but I couldn't even pronounce half of their names much less remember them.

Santana and I were mostly there just to have a good time. I had boarded the dogs and was going to spend the weekend at Santana's. We planned on having our own celebration with Gabe before he left, which was to be a quiet dinner at my house the next day. We were dressed up in sexy dresses and high heels, mostly just to drive each other crazy with lust as we planned on dancing with each other the whole night.

Gabe spent most of his night talking with his friends, drinking, and dancing with some random chick he picked up earlier. Santana and I rotated between the dance floor and the bar to rest. I loved dancing with her. We would sway close together, our hips pressed tightly to one another, thighs sliding teasingly in between each other's legs. We would let our hands roam over each other's backs and sides, and my particular favorite was when Santana faced away from me, grinding her ass into me as I wrapped my arms around her.

Santana ended up having a couple of drinks. She wasn't drunk, but she was a little looser than normal.

"God, you're so sexy babe," she murmured into my ear while we danced.

"Not as sexy as you," I husked sincerely. My hands clenched around her hips, pulling her tighter into my body. Her thigh pressed against my throbbing center and I moaned a little into her hair. "How much longer are we gonna stay here?"

"Why Britt? Do you wanna fuck me?" Santana teased, running her tongue along the shell of my ear.

There were times when I did want to fuck Santana, and for her to fuck me. When I wanted it hard and fast. I didn't want that right now. Right now I wanted to continue the teasing build up we had been doing all night. I wanted the slow turning into the fast when we couldn't take it anymore. But if Santana kept this up, then I wouldn't be able to take it and I would end up fucking her. Probably right here in the club somewhere. That would be another first for me.

"I wanna go back to your place and make you come so hard, San," I moaned into her ear.

Santana turned her face to me and caught my lips. I kissed her hungrily, trailing my tongue across her plump lower lip to try to deepen it. She opened her mouth for me and my tongue dueled with hers. I suddenly slowed the kiss down, gently caressing her tongue with mine. Santana moaned breathily into my mouth.

"Let's go," she panted as she pulled her mouth from mine.

I stood stunned for a moment as I caught my breath at her abrupt separation from my lips. Then I grinned when she grabbed my hand and started marching me through the crowd on the dance floor. God, I couldn't wait to get back to her place.

Santana found Gabe as we were walking off the dance floor and told him we were leaving. He noticed our flushed faces and impatience and smirked at us.

"Have fun! Don't do anything I wouldn't!" Gabe called cheerfully.

Santana flipped him off over her shoulder as she pulled me along. I waved to her brother as we left.

The cab ride home was torture. I wanted to touch her so bad, but the cab driver looked kind of pervy. I could see Santana's scrunched up nose as she looked at him and I could tell we wouldn't be continuing our teasing from the dance floor in the backseat of the car.

Thankfully it wasn't too long of a ride before we made it back to her apartment. I threw some money at the driver and grabbed Santana's hand to pull her out of the cab and hurried toward her door. I sucked on her neck as she worked on unlocking her door.

"Shit, Brittany," she moaned. "I can't think when you do that."

I chuckled and kept my lips where they were. She finally got the door open and she turned and pulled me inside, bringing my mouth crashing to hers. The door slammed shut behind us as Santana walked backwards toward her bedroom. We stumbled a little down the hallway, refusing to break our kiss.

I giggled a little as I caught Santana's hips when she tripped over her heels, keeping her from falling backwards. She kicked her shoes off and grabbed at the fabric of my dress trying to pull it up. Her back bounced off her bedroom doorway and she spun us so that I was walking backwards into her room.

I slipped my own heels off of my feet and went to help Santana get my dress off. We had to stop kissing to slip my tight dress over my head, so I took advantage of the pause to grab at her dress and get it off. I was left in my blue lace bra and panties and Santana was wearing a red bra and thong.

"Fuck, you're so hot," I told her, trailing my fingers in between her breasts and down her stomach.

Her abs twitched under my fingers and I smirked as I teasingly dipped my finger into the waistband of her thong.

"I need you," Santana whimpered.

I loved knowing I could make her feel like this. How she could become desperate for me. I removed my finger and snuck it under the edge of the fabric covering her mound and slid it down the side toward her dripping center.

"I need you naked," I teased, tugging at the fabric.

Santana grumbled but immediately tucked her thumbs into her thong and slid it down. I unclasped her bra and slid it off, dropping it to the floor between us. My hands came around and squeezed her breasts firmly, pinching her hard nipples between my fingers. Her head rolled back and she moaned.

"Do you like that?" I asked her playfully, knowing her answer based on her reaction to me.

"Uh-huh," she breathed. Her chest was heaving, pushing her firm mounds into my hands on each inhale.

"Do you want my mouth on them?" I asked, thinking about putting my mouth somewhere else tonight too.

Santana tilted her head back down to look at me and her eyes looked positively scorching with lust. She didn't answer and instead brought her hands up to mine to stop what I was doing. I looked at her in confusion, but she just smirked at me devilishly.

She pulled my hands away from her beautiful chest and stepped into me. She let go of my arms and wrapped hers around me to unclasp my bra. I let it fall down to bare my chest. Santana ran her thumbs teasingly over my nipples, circling them a few times making my eyes flutter closed.

"San," I moaned. I was so wet I was sure my panties were soaked.

Santana chuckled throatily. She moved her left hand down between my legs, rubbing her fingers over my damp panties making me shudder. "Do you want my mouth on you?"

My mouth dropped open and I lost my breath. I seriously hoped she meant what I thought she did. "Fuck yes," I groaned as soon as my lungs were able to work again.

She continued to rub my clit over my panties as she latched her mouth onto one of my nipples, sucking deliciously and scraping her teeth gently against it. I whimpered a little, both in disappointment and in pleasure as tingles shot through me. My hands went to tangle in her hair, holding her mouth against me as she suckled me.

The hand Santana had between my legs stilled and she moved it up to tuck into my panties to tug them down. Her other hand joined it and my underwear slid to the floor. Santana walked me backwards to the bed, hands resting on my hips to guide me as her mouth stayed on my breast.

I fell backwards onto the bed as my knees hit it. Santana's mouth released my nipple with a pop and she climbed up after me. I lay back and settled in the center of the bed. Santana slid her body over mine, her knees on either side of me as she held herself off of me with her arms.

My hands cupped her face and I pulled her down into a kiss. She slipped her tongue into my mouth and my brain blanked momentarily as she flicked her tongue against mine deliciously. She pressed a peck against my lips as she pulled back and looked at me hungrily.

"Can I taste you?" Santana asked, her voice thick with desire.

I bit my lip as a burst of arousal shot through me. My hips involuntarily rocked up, seeking contact with her. "Please," I begged.

Santana kissed me firmly once more on my mouth before her lips started to kiss their way down my neck. She licked her way down my breastbone and pressed wet kisses to my stomach. My breathing picked up and I felt like I could pass out as hard as I was panting. I was desperate for her mouth to continue down to where I needed it most.

I felt her teeth nip at my hipbones and I spread my legs for her to settle between them. I could feel her hot breath against my dripping folds and I bit back a moan. I was becoming impatient as she didn't make any further move.

I tilted my head up to look at her, only to whimper as I saw her eyes hungrily locked onto my center. The noise caused her eyes to shoot up to mine. I was so fucking ready to feel her mouth against me, and I think she could read the desperation there. She kept her eyes on mine as she leaned forward and slowly dragged her tongue through my folds.

"Ffuuuuck," I moaned as intense pleasure spread throughout my body. My eyes rolled up and my head fell back against the bed.

"Mmmm, you taste so good babe," she moaned against me, immediately bringing her tongue back to flick against my clit.

"San," I groaned as I shuddered.

I wanted to watch what she was doing, but I found that my body was too weak with pleasure to lift my head back up. I tried, but I couldn't. The most I could do was put my hand on her head. My other hand rested against my stomach which was heaving with the panting I was doing.

Santana's hand came up to my stomach intertwine her fingers with mine. I was moaning like crazy, my legs twitching when her tongue would make a particularly hard flick over my clit. Her tongue felt so fucking amazing, better than I had even imagined. She would lick through my wetness from my entrance up and then back down, making sure to concentrate on my clit every so often.

"Shit," I whimpered when I felt her tongue slip into my entrance. "That feels so good, baby."

She hummed against me. Her tongue thrust in and out, moving around inside of me. My hips started to rock against her face, and she wrapped her arms around them to keep them still, leaving her fingers locked with mine.

I finally found the strength to lift my head and look at her, and when I saw her head between my legs obviously enjoying what she was doing, I felt the first signs of my orgasm.

"I'm gonna come," I breathed.

Santana slipped her tongue out and quickly went to suck on my clit, flicking it repeatedly with her tongue. Her eyes flicked up to mine and I felt her moan.

My breathing became ragged and my muscles started to clench. "Ooohh, Ssaaaaan!" I cried as my orgasm shot through me.

This was the most powerful orgasm I had ever had. Santana kept sucking and flicking my clit, helping me ride it out. It felt like it lasted forever.

Finally I started to come back down and Santana gentled her tongue against me. She licked around my center as my breathing calmed and I relaxed. I was limp on the bed, unable to move temporarily. She pressed a final kiss against me then wiped her mouth with her hand before she slid up my body to kiss me. I hummed into the kiss, tasting myself on her lips as it seemed to spark some energy into my body.

"You are really good at that," I murmured against her mouth. She smiled into the kiss.

"Good to know," she said playfully when she pulled back.

Santana looked down at me softly. "I've wanted to do that with you for awhile," I confessed.

She looked a little surprised. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"You never mentioned it, so I wasn't sure if it was something you liked to do," I told her, reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ear.

"I wanted to do it so bad," she said adamantly. "I just wasn't sure if it was something you were comfortable with yet, so I figured we could maybe take our time getting to it. But I absolutely loved it."

"Well, I definitely want to do it again," I said, smirking up at her. "But first, it's your turn."

I rolled her onto her back as she giggled. I quieted her giggles with a kiss, but wasted no time as I moved swiftly down her body. I had waited too long for this, and I didn't want to wait anymore. I pressed hasty kisses down her body, reveling in the fact that her breathing was picking up.

Santana's legs spread easily for me and I situated myself between her thighs, my eyes locking onto her glistening sex. I licked my lips in anticipation and then leaned forward to drag my tongue up from her entrance to her clit.

I delighted in Santana's moan as well as the taste of her on my tongue. She tasted so amazing, and I knew I wanted to do this again and again. I explored her folds with my mouth, licking and sucking eagerly. I did my best to watch Santana's reactions to what I was doing so I could tell what she liked and what wasn't so great.

I concentrated on flicking my tongue over her clit. "Britt!" Santana cried out.

Her hips started to rock against me and I slid my hands under her thighs and around to her hips to hold them still.

"Put it inside, babe," she panted.

I dipped down and pushed my tongue inside of her. Her taste enveloped my tongue and it made me moan. I swirled it around, feeling her walls on it clench a little at the action. Santana was moaning loudly and her fingers buried in my hair to hold my head in place. I had no intention of moving at the moment, so I complied.

I thrust my tongue in and out of her, circling it inside of her. "Fuck, that's so good," she moaned. "So good."

I wanted to make her come so bad. I brought my right hand down from around her hip and replaced my tongue with two fingers inside of her.

"Shit!" Santana cried.

I curled my fingers and started to pump in and out as I latched my mouth onto her clit. I sucked and licked at it while my fingers worked inside of her.

"Don't stop, Britt," she demanded breathily.

I sped up my fingers and tongue and felt Santana's thighs start to clench around my head. Her walls started to flutter around my fingers and with a final pump and curl of my fingers she came hard.

"Oooohhhh, Britttt," she moaned out her release, her fingers tightening in my hair.

I continued to lick her but I slowed my thrusts to help her ride her orgasm out. Once her hips settled, I slid my fingers out and gently cleaned her juices with my tongue. I would definitely never get enough of her taste.

Santana's breathing was still heavy but it was starting to even out, and her body relaxed, her hand falling from my hair. "Come here," she said weakly.

I gave her a final lick, causing her to twitch, and I wiped my mouth with my arm. I crawled up her body and she wrapped her tired arms around me and pulled my body down to hers. I happily lay down on her, relaxing into the feel of her bare body against mine.

"Was that okay?" I asked, a little unsure.

"Jesus, Brittany," she said with an amused smile. "If I didn't know any better I would say you've been doing that for years."

I grinned, pleased that I had satisfied her so well. "I really loved doing that, San," I told her.

"Well I definitely loved you doing that," she giggled, pulling me into a kiss.

We kissed lazily and I slipped my body off to the side so I wouldn't crush her. Our kisses slowed down as our bodies started to tire out, and we ended up slipping into sleep wrapped up in each other.

The alarm on my phone woke me up in the morning. I found myself wrapped up around Santana's side. She was on her back, my arm and leg thrown over her body. My head was sharing her pillow and my face was buried in her hair. She had gotten used to my alarm enough now that she barely stirred when I rolled over to turn it off and take my pill.

Her body followed mine and she spooned up behind me. I relaxed back into her and fell back asleep with her arms around me.

The next time I woke up it was to an insistent soft mouth against my neck.

"Mmmm, Santana," I moaned groggily. My eyes fluttered open as I felt her hand trail up my stomach and cup my breast.

"Good morning, Britt," she rasped near my ear, her breath causing goosebumps to cover my skin.

"What time is it?" I asked, my breath catching when she rolled my nipple between her fingers.

"Time for me to go down on you again," she husked.

"Fuck," I whimpered and buried my face into the pillow as arousal shot through me.

She laughed and I rolled onto my back. She didn't even kiss me good morning before she slipped under the covers and latched her mouth onto my sex. She lapped hungrily at me, driving me high rapidly. She sucked at my clit and slipped a finger inside of me, and I came quickly. Morning sex with Santana was awesome, and my body became incredibly lazy and heavy as sleep wanted to take back over me.

She moved back up and kissed me, which I tried to return. She chuckled at my attempt to reciprocate. "Go back to sleep, sweetie," she said softly before wrapping me up in her arms again, resting her head on my chest.

I slipped back easily into sleep. The next time I awoke it was considerably lighter in the room. Santana was curled up into my side, her head still on my chest. I reached to the nightstand and grabbed my phone to check the time. I was surprised to see that it was almost 11am. I hadn't slept that late in years. But we had a late night and got a lot of exercise, so it made sense.

I put my phone down and turned my attention back to the woman I loved. I started to run my fingers gently through her hair, admiring her as she slept on me. She started to stir after several minutes. She mewled and turned her face into my chest.

I smiled at how adorable she was. "Hi," I said quietly.

She pressed a kiss just underneath my collarbone. "Hey," she said, still sleepy.

"So I had the most awesome dream earlier," I said playfully, still running my fingers through her hair.

"Mmm, is that so?" Santana asked and I could feel her smile against me.

"Uh-huh," I confirmed, my voice lowering. "I dreamt that some insanely hot woman woke me up and ate me out. It was sexy."

"Insanely hot, huh? Do I need to go kick somebody's ass?" Santana asked, playing along.

"I don't know," I husked. "I guess it depends on whether or not you think I should return the favor to her."

Santana sucked in a breath at my words.

"Do you want me to return the favor, Santana?" I asked, trailing my hand down her side and around to her front to slide my fingers through her slick folds.

She nodded against me as she moaned. I started to circle her clit gently. She rolled onto her back and I followed. I started to kiss and suck on her neck. Just as we were really starting to get into it, we were interrupted.

"Good morning, ladies!" Gabe called as he slammed the front door behind him.

I immediately stilled my hand against Santana, pulling my head back to look at her in surprise. She furrowed her brow in frustration.

"Fuck! Don't you dare fucking stop," she commanded before raising her voice to yell at her brother. "Go away, Gabe!"

I hesitated, not wanting to continue making love to Santana if her brother was here. I saw the desperation in her eyes though, and slowly started to circle her clit again. She moaned quietly in appreciation.

"Didn't you guys get enough last night?" Gabe yelled.

"No! Now get the fuck out!" Santana yelled back angrily.

I smirked at how desperately Santana wanted me to make her come. "You think this is funny?" Santana asked me quietly.

I could see the hint of a smile on her lips, but I still shook my head. "No," I told her. "I just love how much you want me."

She bit her lip, her eyes full of lust. "You have no idea," she breathed.

"Come on, I don't wanna see my sisters naked!" Gabe called again, sounding a little closer.

I stilled my hand again, not really wanting to continue if he wasn't going to leave. I shot Santana a guilty look.

"Fuck," she whined, her face screwed up in frustration. "I'm gonna kill him."

"I'm sorry, baby," I apologized, empathizing with her lack of relief. "I don't think he's going to leave."

"I'm going to fucking kill you, Gabe!" Santana yelled to her brother, all of her frustration evident in her voice.

I pulled my hand away from between her legs and gave her a kiss to try to soothe her. "We should get dressed I guess," I said quietly.

Santana grumbled, but we got out of bed and put some clothes on. We didn't bother getting ready for the day yet and just headed out to greet Gabe.

"Thanks for twat-swatting me, you dick," Santana chastised her brother, slapping him on the back of the head lightly as we joined him in the living room.

Gabe just laughed, not even caring. I blushed furiously at the apparent lack of boundaries between the siblings.

"Aww, Britt, are you embarrassed?" Gabe teased me. "Come on, I obviously know you guys have sex. And I'm sorry you guys didn't get off this morning."

I blushed harder at his ribbing, but decided to just give up my embarrassment and join in. "As a matter of fact, your sister gave me a great orgasm this morning," I informed him. "It was Santana who didn't get off, thanks to your unfortunate timing."

Gabe's eyes widened and he choked a little in surprise at my out of character confession. He coughed, trying to recover. Santana, whose own eyes had widened a little in shock at first, laughed at him. She grinned at me and pressed a firm kiss to my burning cheek.

"You're amazing," she whispered into my ear. I smiled at her compliment and we sat down on the couch Gabe wasn't occupying. "Why are you here this early, Gabe? I thought we were meeting later for dinner."

Gabe had finally recovered and looked a little guilty. "Sorry, but I am going to have to move dinner up a little bit tonight," he said. "My new coach called me and wants me in town earlier tomorrow than I planned, so I need to be home at a decent time."

Santana pouted a little bit at the thought of her brother leaving even earlier. I rubbed her thigh comfortingly. "That's okay," I told her brother. "What time do we need to eat then?"

"Could we do like 4:30?" I looked at him in surprise. We were going to eat at 7 o'clock originally.

"Yeah, I can do that," I said. I was planning on cooking stuffed peppers and we had gotten a cake from Kyle's shop. We would have to change plans quite a bit, but it would work okay.

Gabe hung around for a bit with us. I figured he had come over so early because he felt bad about having to leave earlier. I knew he was just as sad about leaving his sister behind as Santana was for him to leave. They were each other's only family, so it was hard to handle.

We visited for about an hour before we decided that Santana and I needed to actually get ready for the day. We agreed to meet at my house at 4:30 for dinner. Santana was subdued most of the day. Dinner was pretty quiet, but we talked a lot about family stories they remembered from their childhood. At the end of the evening, Gabe hugged me tightly.

"You're gonna take care of her, right?" Gabe asked quietly in my ear.

"I promise," I whispered to him.

"I'm going to miss you, sis-in-law," he said.

I grinned. "I'm going to miss you, too."

The goodbye between Santana and Gabe took a bit longer. I could tell my girlfriend was fighting off tears. I hung back and gave them privacy to say what they needed to say to each other. They hugged for a long time, murmuring things to each other. Finally, Gabe said goodbye once more and left.

Santana broke down shortly after he drove away. I held her tightly to me, cuddling with her on the couch. I quietly comforted her, whispering to her that she would see him again soon. I hated when it got too late and she had to go home. I wanted to hold her all night, and I knew she wanted that too. But she needed to go home since tomorrow was Monday and we both had to get up early for work.

I was never happy when we had to part when the weekend was over. I hoped that maybe we could do something about that soon.

 **A/N: The response to the last chapter was amazing! I can't believe you guys! I now have over 100 reviews on this story, something I could barely even imagine happening... thank you so much!**

 **So there clearly wasn't a lot of plot development in this chapter. We just got to see a bit more sexy times (I'm sure you're all disappointed) and Gabe had to go away. I wonder what kind of impact that will have on their relationship now that they don't have Gabe as a kind of buffer/mutual tie?**

 **It looks like Brittany is definitely getting more serious about Santana. Maybe confessions of love will be soon? Or something else? And it is pretty obvious that Brittany has become much more comfortable about being intimate with Santana, which means Santana is more comfortable making suggestions to spice things up. I wonder if Santana realizes how much more sexually adventurous Brittany is with her than she was with Sam?**

 **More stuff will happen in the next chapter, I promise! But I hope this chapter wasn't too much of a disappointment ;)**

 **Let me know what you guys think!**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

The rest of the summer seemed to pass by quickly. I did my best to keep Santana's mind off of her brother leaving. She had lost so many people in her life, and she had become so close to Gabe as a result. The fact that her little brother was no longer just a few minutes away was hard for her to deal with and I completely understood.

I tried to show her that I was there for her instead. I knew I couldn't replace her brother and I hadn't been in her life that long, but I cared about her so much. She didn't know that I was in love with her, but she didn't need to know that to know that she was the most important person in my life. I wanted to make her happy and I hoped I was important to her too.

I knew Santana talked to Gabe every day. I kept in touch with him as well. He would often text to see how I was doing and ask how Santana was holding up. I was glad when I could tell him that she started to cheer up a bit more as time went on.

We did a lot of things together, pretty much like we had done before. We went out on dates several nights a week. Santana started to spend the night at my house a little more often during the week, which neither of us was complaining about. And we pretty much always spent all weekend together from Friday evening until Sunday night. We got even closer in Gabe's absence, now that it was just the two of us most of the time we got together.

Although we did try to include other people sometimes. We had hung around with Kyle a few times and I met his boyfriend, Charlie. They were fun to be around, and we mostly ended up playing some type of board game or another. I discovered that Santana was really competitive and I knew a lot of random trivia. We always ate well when we hung out with them, because Kyle usually brought some sort of goodies from his shop.

I met a few more of Santana's friends. She got a lot of teasing for not seeing as much of them since we started hanging out and then dating. She just smiled and ignored them, often pressing sweet kisses to my cheek while they laughed at her. Santana always told me later that she didn't care what they thought because she preferred being with me more than seeing them. That made my heart skip several beats.

I was happier than I had ever been in my life. Gus often smiled at me when I walked into work with a happy grin on my face. He always listened to my stories about Santana patiently and we started even more friendly conversations. He talked to me more about his own life, regaling me of tales of him and his wife and kids. I really liked him more and more, and eagerly accepted his invitation for Santana and I to join him and his wife, Sandy, for dinner.

Santana had heard me talk about Gus a lot, and she was really pleased to meet him. She found him incredibly sweet and charming, even if he did blush when he met her. That earned him a playful slap from his wife, which made me laugh. I knew exactly how he felt, because I blushed the same way the first time I met my gorgeous girlfriend. Sandy was hilarious and outgoing, unlike her quiet husband. She loved to joke around and she made the whole dinner really comfortable.

The next several months were spent settling even more into our relationship. It was so much different than being with Sam. I thought about her all the time. I thought about just being in the same room as her. I thought about holding her hand. I thought about kissing her. And, of course, I thought about making love to her. I had learned to live with the little bit of guilt I felt comparing how much stronger I felt about Santana than my former husband. I felt that Santana was my soulmate. She was the person I was supposed to be with for the rest of my life.

I was so incredibly in love with her. I wanted to tell her every day, but I was so scared. At first I told myself that it was too soon to say it. Then, as time went on, I told myself that the time wasn't right. I would find myself almost saying it but the words sticking in my throat. Or I would tell myself I would say it and then my heart would pound and my palms would sweat and I would chicken out. I knew I was scared that I would say it and she wouldn't say it back. The fact that she hadn't said it yet made me that much more scared to say it first.

Summer started to give way to fall, and I was looking forward to it. I loved the fall. I loved being able to cuddle up under a blanket, and now that I had Santana to join me I knew I was going to love it even more. I wanted to sip hot chocolate with her on a lazy Sunday when we stayed in our warm pajamas all day. I wanted to go out and enjoy the changing leaves on a nice slow walk with her. I wanted to pick out pumpkins and carve them together and watch scary movies and hold each other when we got scared.

Gabe was due to come for a visit in October. His new team was playing the Blue Jackets in Columbus on the weekend and we were planning on seeing him Saturday. Santana was so excited to see her brother again for the first time in months. I knew Gabe was excited too, because he kept telling me how he couldn't wait to see us again.

I planned on spending the weekend at Santana's that weekend. I was looking forward to spending time at her place, without animals to bother us in bed in the morning. I was also really looking forward to seeing her brother again. I had missed the man.

It was Friday afternoon and I was getting impatient. I sighed. I really didn't want to be at work. I decided to go ahead and leave work a couple hours early and show up to Santana's a little before her so I could surprise her when she got home. We had exchanged keys to each other's places since one of us was at the other's house throughout the week.

I drove home to get the dogs and drop them off at the kennel to board for the weekend. I packed a bag and loaded everything up. After I dropped the dogs off, I headed to the grocery store to pick up something to make for dinner. By the time I finished all of my errands and made it back downtown, it was almost 5pm. Santana usually got off work around then, so I would beat her home by a little bit.

I parked my car and grabbed the groceries and my bag and made my way to her apartment. I unlocked the door and heard noise from the kitchen. I wondered if Santana had maybe left early without telling me. I hadn't seen her car, but I hadn't been looking for it.

I set the bag with my clothes and my purse down in the entryway and headed toward the kitchen with the groceries.

"Baby? Are you here?" I asked as I walked into the little dining area.

I saw the back of a woman leaning into the fridge. She straightened up at my voice and I immediately recognized that it wasn't my girlfriend. The unknown woman had messy red hair and was wearing only a t-shirt. It was obvious she had just gotten out of bed with someone.

My heart started to pound with fear and I set the groceries down on the table hard. There's no way Santana would cheat on me. She couldn't. She hated cheating. But there was this scantily clad woman in front of me who had turned around and was looking at me with a mixture of fear and guilt. My heart and my head were telling me two different things.

"Who the fuck are you?" I asked the redhead, my voice shaky yet angry.

"Who are you?" The woman asked, refusing to answer the question. She crossed her arms protectively in front of her chest.

"I'm pretty sure I asked you first," I said firmly, making it clear that I wasn't going to stand for her shit.

"Look, I didn't know…" she began.

I held a hand up to stop her. "Just stop," I commanded, clenching my eyes shut.

I heard footsteps coming through the hall and I started to panic. I didn't want Santana to see me like this. I took a deep breath and forced my eyes open as the footsteps entered the kitchen.

"Hey, babe, where's that water?"

My mouth dropped open in surprise and my heart sunk. "Oh, hey Brittany," Gabe said in happy surprise as he wrapped his arm around the redhead.

"Gabe, what the fuck are you doing here?" I asked angrily. He was standing unashamedly in his underwear in the middle of his sister's kitchen with his hook-up. I was mad at him for doing something stupid like this. But mostly I was mad at myself for even thinking for a second that Santana would have cheated on me.

He looked at me for a second and realized that I was trying to recover from the emotional rollercoaster ride I had just experienced. I saw the moment that it sunk in for him how the situation looked. His eyes widened and his mouth dropped in horror.

"Oh my God, no!" Gabe exclaimed, letting go of the woman and taking a step toward me. He looked at me imploringly. "You know she would never do that."

I fought off angry tears. God, I felt so stupid. I _knew_ that she wouldn't, but it didn't stop me from fearing it. "I know," I whispered, my voice hoarse.

All of a sudden I heard keys in the lock of the front door. My own eyes widened in horror and met Gabe's whose were mirroring mine. The redhead was still standing by the fridge, a lost look on her face. The front door opened and I heard Santana's footsteps pause momentarily as the door shut behind her.

"Britt, are you here?" Santana called.

I froze, unsure what to do. Santana's footsteps got closer as she headed into the dining area where I was standing.

"Hey," she greeted me happily with a smile.

I tried to smile back, but I was still frozen. I had a bad feeling about this. Santana's brow scrunched a little when I didn't respond. Then I saw her eyes land on her brother and the woman in the kitchen. Her eyes lit up at first when she saw Gabe, but then she took in the whole picture. The half naked woman, who still looked incredibly confused. Gabe standing in just his boxers next to her. The look on my face, which I'm sure was still a mixture of hurt, anger, and fear. Santana's eyes got big and her mouth dropped open at first. Then her mouth snapped shut and her lips pursed and I saw the flash of hurt in her eyes.

"Santana," I began and took a step toward her, finally spurred into action by that look of pain in my girlfriend.

Santana held up her hand to me and I froze again. She turned toward her brother. "When I gave you a key to my place I never meant that you could bring your random chicks here to bang," she bit out.

"Tana, I'm sorry," Gabe apologized, looking properly guilty.

"Just stop, Gabe," she said quietly, her voice strained. "Get you and your… _friend_ … here dressed and out of my house. Now."

"Santana, please," he pleaded, taking a step toward her.

"Baby," I started again, trying to calm her.

" _Now_ ," Santana repeated again, her voice dangerously low.

Gabe nodded sadly and turned to lead the redhead out of the kitchen. I could practically see the gears turning in the woman's head as she started to piece together what was going on. I turned my own guilty face back to my girlfriend, who had crossed her arms around her chest as if she were holding herself. She looked like she was trying to prevent herself from falling apart. Her face had fallen and she was clenching her jaw in an effort to fight off her tears.

I wanted to comfort her, but the instant I started to move toward her she flinched slightly back from me. I stopped, my heart sinking to the floor. My eyes started to sting as I fought not to cry. I bit my lip and held still, clenching my fists to keep myself from reaching out to her until she told me it was okay.

It was only a few minutes later when Gabe and the redhead came back out fully dressed. The woman looked apologetic, and I could tell that she knew what was going on. Either Gabe had told her or she had figured it out. Either way, it didn't even matter anymore. What's done was done.

"I really am sorry, Tana," Gabe said again, his voice barely above a whisper.

Santana ignored him. He shot me a sad look and mouthed an apology to me. I gave him a sad smile and he put his hand on the redhead's back to lead her out.

"I'm sorry, too," the woman said as they walked out of the room toward the front door.

Neither of us said anything, and the pair left the apartment. We stood in silence for a few moments. Santana still wouldn't look at me. I couldn't take it anymore.

"San, please say something," I begged.

"I can't believe you would think that I could do that," she whispered, her eyes still averted from me.

"I didn't," I defended, and she shot me a disbelieving look. At least she was looking at me. "Not really."

"Seriously?" Santana asked scornfully. "You are seriously going to stand there and tell me- with that look on your face when I walked in like you had been stabbed- that you didn't think I had slept with that woman?"

"Just listen to me, please?" I implored her. She tightened her arms around herself and looked back down at the floor, but she remained quiet.

I wanted to move toward her but I was afraid that she would reject my advance once again. "When I walked in, I heard someone in the kitchen and thought you were home. I walked in and immediately realized it wasn't you. I saw this strange, half naked woman in your apartment with no explanation. I didn't want to think it. Deep down, I knew you wouldn't cheat- that you couldn't cheat on me. But I couldn't help that fear from creeping in, especially when she wouldn't tell me who she was or anything," I explained, pleading with her to understand.

"If you knew I wouldn't cheat then it shouldn't have ever crossed your mind," she snapped.

"I know how you feel about cheating, Santana," I said firmly. "I know you care about me and you wouldn't cheat on someone you care about, and I had that voice inside of me screaming that at me when I saw that woman. But the fear was there because of Sam. I didn't think he would cheat on me either, but he did… and because of that, I can't stop that fear when some unknown woman who clearly had just had sex is standing in the middle of your kitchen."

Santana's face softened a little when I mentioned Sam. I felt like I was getting through to her. "I just don't want to lose you, San," I said softly. "That's what I was so afraid of."

She looked up at me and I could see the understanding and care in her eyes. "Britt, you won't lose me," she promised quietly. "And I especially wouldn't risk our relationship by cheating on you. You mean too much to me."

Her voice broke a little, and I couldn't resist taking her in my arms. I stepped toward her quickly and wrapped my arms around her tightly. She squeezed me back, burying her face in my neck.

"I don't want you to be mad at me," I whispered into her hair.

"I'm not mad at you, Britt," she reassured me. "I'm mad at my idiot brother."

I chuckled a little, pulling back to wipe away the traces of the few tears that had escaped from her eyes.

"God, he was so stupid to do that," I said. "I seriously wanted to smack him."

She cracked a smile. "I wanted to kick him in the balls for making you hurt like that," she confessed.

I looked into her eyes gently. "It was a fucked up situation, San," I told her. "But you shouldn't hold it against him. He's your brother."

She rolled her eyes. "I know, but I still think he needs to be punished."

"I think the way you kicked him out was punishment enough," I said honestly.

Her face grew contemplative and she nodded in agreement. Then something struck her suddenly. "Did you take your pill?"

I looked at her guiltily. "I kind of forgot with everything going on," I confessed.

"I figured," she said, scolding me a little. She let go of me and went to the kitchen to grab a glass from the cupboard. She started to fill it up with water and I went to my bag to get my pills. I grabbed them and walked back into the kitchen. I looked at the time on the stove and saw that I was only about a half an hour late with my pill, so it wasn't too bad. She turned and handed me the glass. I quickly swallowed my pill and she visibly relaxed.

"Thanks, baby," I told her, leaning in to give her a kiss.

She kissed me softly and I pulled back a little. Our eyes met and caught, and a surge of arousal shot through me at the look in her eyes. She wanted me. She _needed_ me. I reached behind her and set the glass on the counter off to her side, then brought my hand up to cup her cheek. She leaned into my touch, and I quickly caught her lips in a hungry kiss.

Santana hummed into it, and I tilted my head to deepen it. My tongue darted into her mouth to explore, and hers fought back. I needed her so badly right now. We needed to re-forge that connection that had taken a little beating earlier. I pinned her body up against the counter and her arms wrapped around my neck to pull me closer to her, almost desperately.

"Up on the counter," I husked against her lips, tucking my hands beneath her thighs and tugging up a little so she understood what I wanted.

Santana let go of my neck and used her hands to push herself up and I guided her ass back onto the counter. She spread her legs a little and I placed myself between them, her skirt riding up as I got closer to her. She was now a little higher than me, so she leaned down to catch my lips once again hungrily. I sucked on her plump lower lip and my hands started caressing her breasts over her blouse. Thankfully she wasn't wearing a blazer today.

"Britt," she moaned as I pinched her hardening nipples. "Fuck, what has gotten into you?"

I ignored her and stopped paying attention to her breasts only to start unbuttoning her blouse quickly. I got all the way down to where it was tucked into her skirt, leaving the rest and going back up to push the blouse off of her shoulders a little so her chest was exposed. I slid my hands into the cups of her bra and started massaging her boobs. It wasn't enough, so I pushed the cups down and pulled her breasts out over the top of them to reveal her magnificent mounds.

"God, I love your tits, Tana," I groaned. "I could suck on them all day."

Santana gasped when my mouth sucked in one of her nipples, scraping my teeth gently across it. Her hips rocked into me and I knew she was getting desperate for me. I continued to suck and nip at her boobs, alternating between each so neither one was neglected. Soon her tits were covered in red marks from my attention, and she was moaning and whimpering non-stop.

"Please, babe," she begged.

I let go of her boobs and pushed her skirt further up her hips. "Lift up," I commanded.

She pushed herself up and I reached under her skirt to grab hold of her panties and slide them down her legs. She kicked them off of her still heel-clad feet and sat back down on the counter, her skirt now pushed up far enough to reveal her glistening sex.

I got on my knees between her thighs, my eyes becoming level with her folds. I wrapped my hands under her thighs and tugged her gently forward so her ass was at the edge of the counter. She leaned back on her hands to support herself and I brought my mouth to her center.

"Fuck!" Santana cried out as I ran my tongue up through her folds and started hungrily lapping at her clit.

I wasn't being gentle. I wanted her to come fast and hard. I hummed against her, delighting in her taste. I would never get enough of it. I sucked on her clit and thrust two fingers into her without warning. Santana cried out again, and her upper body started to sink down on the counter as her arms started to give out.

"Britt," Santana moaned. "I'm gonna come. _Fuck_."

I quickened my thrusts with my fingers and flicked my tongue rapidly against her clit. Her hips were rocking against my face when I felt her walls start to clamp down on my fingers.

"Shit!" Santana screamed as she came hard, her thighs tightening around my head.

I stopped my thrusts but continued tonguing her clit, enjoying her juices and the feel of her clenching rhythmically on my fingers. I slipped my fingers out when she started to relax and gave one final, gentle lick to her folds.

Santana was panting, and she kind of collapsed over onto her side to lie on the counter. I shuffled myself over a bit to bring our mouths together in a passionate kiss. She brought her hand up to lazily hold my mouth against hers.

"That was fucking amazing," she breathed when I pulled back. "You have gotten so good at that."

I grinned in satisfaction. "What can I say? I'm a quick learner, and I had a good teacher," I said playfully.

"Mmm, well how about I teach you some more then?" Santana asked teasingly.

I giggled and stood up, pulling her off the counter. I pulled her back toward her bedroom, starting to strip my clothes off along the way. Santana was giggling behind me, and I loved that sound.

We quickly finished undressing each other once we made it to her room. Santana practically threw me back onto the bed and settled herself on top of me. She started kissing me deeply and full of passion, and I moaned into her mouth as I buried my hand in her hair.

All of a sudden, her kiss changed. She slowed it down, not kissing me as hungrily. It was still deep, but full of something more tender. She brought her hand up and tucked it under the back of my neck. Her fingers started to scratch lightly at the hair on the nape of my neck, sending tingles down my spine. Her kiss gentled further until she was placing light, lingering pecks against my lips.

I could tell she was feeling something stronger at the moment. She wanted to make love, not fuck like we had done in the kitchen. My heart fluttered at the thought and love surged through me.

Santana pulled back a little to look at me tenderly before she slid down my body, her lips leaving goosebumps in their wake as she trailed kisses over my skin. She paid attention to my breasts for several minutes before sliding further down. She settled herself between my spread thighs and kissed my drenched core.

I hissed in pleasure when her tongue licked gently through my folds. She took her time, savoring what she was doing. My eyes were closed and I was breathing rapidly. She started to suck on my clit and I moaned. It felt so good, but I needed more of her.

"San, I need to feel you," I gasped.

My girlfriend knew exactly what I wanted much to my relief. She replaced her mouth with her fingers, sliding them gently against my center as she moved back up my body. She lay her body atop of mine, bringing us so close together. She kissed my neck gently, then up my jaw and across my cheek before reaching my lips. She slid her tongue into my mouth the same time she slid her fingers into me.

I sucked in a breath through my nose. Santana slowly thrust her fingers in and out of me, building me up. My body was making its way higher and higher. She knew exactly how to play me. Her thumb started to rub my clit and her fingers curled inside of me. She picked her pace up a little and her fingers kept hitting that spot deep inside of me that she knew how to hit just right.

I was getting close, and she knew it. She broke our kiss to pull back and watch me. I knew it was something she liked to do. Hell, I loved watching her when she came. She was so beautiful in that moment.

"Open your eyes, Brittany," she said softly.

My eyes fluttered open and locked onto her dark chocolate gaze. Her eyes were full of tenderness and what I hoped was love. She searched my eyes and all of the feelings crashed over me. My eyes clenched shut as I came, my arms squeezing her body harder into mine as my muscles clenched in release.

Santana helped me ride out my orgasm until I started to come down. My heart was pounding and my breathing was rapid as my eyes fluttered open and saw her staring down at me in awe.

"You are so beautiful," she whispered reverently. She leaned down and kissed me softly, slipping her fingers out of me and sliding off to the side of me.

Santana brought her hand up to caress my cheek as she pulled back to look deep into my eyes again. I loved her so much, and I wanted to do this every day with her. I didn't want to be away from her anymore. I didn't want something like today to be able to happen again. I opened my mouth.

"I love you."

My eyes widened and I froze at the words.

Did she really just say that? Santana told me she loved me. My mind was all in a jumble from the words I wasn't expecting to hear. "Move in with me," I blurted.

Santana stiffened next to me, her face unreadable.

"Shit, that's not what I meant." She started to roll away from me onto her back. "No, I did mean that. God, I'm fucking this up so bad," I moaned.

I propped myself up on my elbow and looked down at Santana. She was hurting, and I was an idiot. I caressed her cheek, but she wouldn't look at me. "Say it again," I pleaded softly. She shook her head a little. "Please, Santana. Say it again."

She bit her lip and reluctantly met my eyes. I could see the apprehension in them, and I hated that I had made her question herself.

"I love you," she whispered.

I smiled gently down at her. "I love you, too," I told her, the emotion thickening my voice. Her face softened a little and I could see the light come back into her eyes.

"Yeah?" Santana asked in a small voice, a hint of a smile starting to grace her mouth.

"Yeah," I said with a nod. "I am so crazy in love with you, Santana. I have been for awhile, which is why I want you to move in with me."

She broke out into a grin. "You do?"

"God, yes! I want to wake up with you every morning and go to sleep with you every night," I enthused. "I don't want to be away from you anymore. And, I mean, we can move into my place or maybe work out something here with the dogs. Or we can find a new place together. I just want to come home to you every day."

"Yes… yes… yes!" Santana exclaimed in between kisses. "I would love to move in with you!"

"Really?" I asked, a little surprised at her eager acceptance.

She nodded, smiling so big that her dimples were deep creases in her cheeks. "Really, babe," she said.

I grinned and kissed her firmly, my heart soaring. "I love you so much, Santana," I murmured against her lips.

"I love you too, Brittany," she replied.

I settled down into her, resting my head on her chest. She wrapped her arms around me and held me against her. I was so happy and content. I couldn't wait to be with her like this every day.

"I think we should move into your house," Santana said suddenly, startling me out of my thoughts.

"Are you sure? I don't want you to feel like you have to move in there," I said seriously. "We can find somewhere else if you want."

"I love your house, Britt," Santana confessed. "I have really felt at home there. It's so comfortable and it's a good space for Lance and Lady and Lord Tubbington. And I really think it is perfect for us."

I lifted my head to look at her. "Is it what you really want?" I asked, wanting her to be sure.

"Absolutely, yes," she said, smiling at me happily. "I can't wait to live with you there."

I smiled sweetly back at her. "I can't wait either, San."

Things seemed to be falling into place perfectly. We had finally told each other that we loved each other. Santana was going to move in with me. I was definitely looking forward to this fall.

 **A/N: So much happened this chapter! We have declarations of love! And yes, Santana said it first, but did I fake anybody out thinking Brittany did it? And Brittany asked Santana to move in with her! Things are definitely progressing with them.**

 **I apologize for making Brittany fear that Santana was cheating on her. I absolutely HATE cheating, and I would NEVER make these two cheat on each other. It is something that I feel strongly about, and it was something that they swore they would never do on the show and I honor that. But I wanted to make it clear in this story that it was never going to happen, and the best way to do that was to have something like that happen so they could clear the air. I hope it didn't piss anybody off or anything by doing that.**

 **But we got more sexy times, I love yous, and plans to cohabitate, so I think that it was a decent chapter. And, as much as I do like Gabe, I have to say that it was a pretty dick move to bring a woman back to his sister's apartment for sex. I don't think he will ever be doing that again!**

 **Let me know what you guys think! I love hearing from you!**


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

"What do you think about this color, Britt?" Santana asked me, holding out a paint chip for me to look at.

I looked at the sample she held out to me. "It's okay," I said, not particularly thrilled at the mint green color she was showing me. "What about this one?"

I showed her a sample of a sky blue. We were trying to come up with a color we both liked to paint the living room.

Santana had moved in a few weeks ago. It didn't take her long to move in. She decided to transfer her apartment to Gabe so he had a place to stay in the offseason and when he came into town to visit so we didn't have a similar situation to the last time happen again.

Since she left the majority of her furniture at the apartment for Gabe, she didn't have too much to move. Basically just her clothes, a few odds and ends, and, of course, her books. It was a little hard to mesh two peoples' things together, but we were doing a pretty good job. Santana's bookshelves were put into the room I had set up as an office since there were so many of them, and we found places that worked for a lot of her things. I put away some of my stuff so she could have space for hers.

What was once my home was becoming our home. There were pictures of us together on the walls. There were pictures of Gabe and her family in the living room along with pictures of my family. I took my wedding picture down and put out one of me and Sam at Christmas one year instead. I didn't want to remove Sam from the house, and Santana told me she didn't want me to either. I didn't want the memory of my husband as a cloud hanging over our home, but I didn't want to hide him.

We were working on making the rest of the house comfortable to both of our tastes. We had already bought new bedding for the master bed, but Santana had said she didn't want to change too much about that room. She said she loved it the way it was. So we just got some new sheets and a comforter that we both liked and left the rest of the room the way it was. Except for the picture of us Gabe had taken the day he left for Nashville was put in there.

Santana said the kitchen didn't need any work since I did most of the cooking, but she preferred it the way it was anyways. So that left the living room. We were looking at new furniture since we spent a lot more time out here together than I had done when I lived alone. My couch wasn't that comfortable, and we had looked at some really nice couches and loveseats. I told Santana she could pick what she wanted since I liked what she had chosen for her place, and because she would probably spend more time on them than I would with her reading.

So that left us trying to decide on a new paint color. It was easier said than done. I had left my walls white originally and added bits of color with the furniture and decorations. So it wouldn't be too hard to paint if we could actually decide on something.

"I don't know if I want to do blue, babe," Santana said, referring to the sample I had just shown her.

I frowned a little but then my phone rang, distracting me from what we were doing. "Hold on a minute, San," I said. "It's my mom."

Santana nodded in acknowledgement and I answered the call.

"Brittany! How are you honey?" My mom's voice rang through the phone.

"Hey mom," I greeted her. "I'm fine, how are you?"

"Oh, I'm okay," she told me. "Your father's driving me insane, but what else is new?"

I didn't bother answering considering I knew she wasn't expecting me to even make a remark on it. My dad had retired earlier in the year and my mom wasn't used to him being around the house so much.

"So I haven't heard from you if you were coming for Thanksgiving or not," she said, getting to the reason for her call.

I hesitated. I had planned on spending the holiday with Santana, but it was just the beginning of November and I hadn't really discussed anything with her yet.

"I don't know mom," I said. "I haven't really thought about it yet."

"Honey, we haven't seen you in months," my mom chastised.

I felt really guilty because she was telling the truth. Ever since I had met Santana I had talked a little less to my family and hadn't even visited them since Easter. They lived less than two hours away, but I had just been so busy with my girlfriend and everything that I hadn't even thought about seeing them.

"I know. I'm sorry," I said guiltily.

"So will you come?" My mom asked sweetly.

I looked over at Santana who was still looking through paint chips.

"Can I bring my friend Santana? She doesn't have anyone else to celebrate with," I said, immediately seeing Santana's head snap up to look at me.

I knew I was in deep shit based on the tightened lips and the narrowed eyes directed my way from my girlfriend. I just looked at her apologetically.

"Well, Bonnie, Adam, and Chase are coming so the house is going to be pretty full," my mom began, mentioning my sister and her family. "If your friend doesn't mind sleeping on the couch or an air mattress in the living room, I guess it will work."

"It's okay, we can share my room," I told her.

"An air mattress wouldn't fit in your room," she argued.

"We're adults, mom, we can share a bed," I explained.

"Okay. Then I guess that problem is solved!" My mom cheered.

"I guess so," I said quietly, looking at my girlfriend glaring at me. Santana sat there with her arms crossed and she was more pissed off than I had ever seen her. "I should probably go though, I have some things to do."

"Okay, Brittany," she said. "I can't wait to see you."

"Me, too," I told her. "Bye."

I disconnected the call and bit my lip in apprehension at the verbal reaming that was about to come my way.

"Are you fucking kidding me, Brittany?" Santana asked, her voice biting. "Do your parents seriously not know we are together?"

"No," I confessed, my heart pounding in fear.

"What. The actual. _Fuck_ ," Santana said dangerously low.

"I just don't really tell them anything," I tried to explain. "I'm not trying to hide you or anything. I mean, my mom knows we've hung around a lot together and everything. You know I have a hard time telling people things, though, and that includes my parents."

"Brittany, they're your parents!" Santana yelled. "And I'm your girlfriend, whom you claim to love! They should know that I am more than your friend."

"And they will, I promise," I said quickly.

"When? In five years?" Santana asked scornfully.

"No, of course not."

"I cannot go to your family's house and pretend to be your friend," she said seriously, and my heart sunk a little.

"You don't have to pretend," I reassured her. "They will find out because I know I won't be able to keep from touching you."

"So you still won't tell them." It wasn't a question.

"No, that's not what I meant," I said, exasperated. "Once they see how we act together, then someone will bring it up. And then I can tell them. I just can't tell them before because they wouldn't get it."

Santana looked at me with confusion. "What do you mean?"

"If I just told them that I was dating a woman and was in love with her, they wouldn't really believe it," I said. "I have only been with Sam and, as far as they know, I'm straight. So this would be out of left field for them. They need to see how I feel about you so they can understand that this is real. _We_ are real. And I think it would help my dad understand to see it, because he is going to be the problem."

Her face softened a little and I started to relax. "Britt, are you scared about telling them you're bi?"

I averted my eyes briefly before I looked back up at her and nodded. "I've never had to tell them something like this before," I said. "Something about me that would change the way they look at me. I mean, it was hard enough to tell them I was dating Sam because I would start growing up more in their eyes then and they would worry about me having sex and all that. But to tell them that I am bisexual and that I have kept that fact from them makes me terrified as to how they will react."

"Are you scared about telling them about me?" Santana asked quietly.

I shook my head vehemently. "No, San," I said hastily. "You are the best thing in my life. I _want_ them to know about you. I want them to see how much I love you and how happy you make me."

The corners of her mouth started to turn up and I relaxed further. "I love you too," she said softly. "And I promise I will be there to help you tell them."

I smiled a little at her. "Yeah?"

"Yeah, babe," she nodded. "But you better tell them or we're gonna have a serious talk."

"Okay," I said easily. I knew I wouldn't be able to hide how I felt about her, so I wasn't worried about that threat at all.

Things continued to be a little strained between us after that. We were still fine and incredibly in love. We loved living together and had adjusted well to that. But there was this little cloud that was kind of following us around that I knew wouldn't dissipate until Thanksgiving.

In the end I agreed with Santana's suggestion for paint color. The living room was now a very light gray, complimented by the dark, cushy couches we got to replace my old ones. We donated my old furniture along with some of each of our old things that didn't really go in the home we had created for ourselves.

Now we were in the car driving to my parents' house. It was Thanksgiving morning and we had the dogs in the back with our suitcases since we were going to spend the night. Unfortunately, Santana had started an argument that we had been having ever since we had talked about her moving in.

"I just don't understand why you won't let me help with the house payment," she whined.

"Because Santana, I don't need your help with it," I argued. "I make more than enough to cover it all, but I said you could help out with the bills and stuff."

"I feel like I am not even contributing anything and you are like taking care of everything for me," she said. "I have money and I don't need you to take care of me."

I glanced at her from the driver's seat, noting her pout and crossed arms. Even when she was angry I found her irresistible. "Baby, I know that," I said calmly. "But I'm sure you are still paying off your student loans and other debt or whatever, so I am not concerned with you giving me anything for the house. Okay?"

"Britt," Santana began, her voice quiet. Then she paused.

"Yeah?" I asked, prompting her to continue.

"Nothing. It doesn't matter," she said.

I shot her a confused look. "You sure?"

She nodded. The rest of the drive passed without incident and we finally pulled up to my parents' house in Lima. It was a nice two story brick faced house. It was always nice to be back, but it no longer felt like home.

My mom opened the front door as soon as I let the dogs out of my car.

"There's my grandpuppies!" My mom exclaimed excitedly.

Lance and Lady bounded over to my mother, tails wagging furiously as she lavished them with attention.

Santana gave me a strange look as we grabbed our bags out of the car.

"It's okay," I told her with a grin. "I understand I come second to the grandbabies."

"But you're her daughter," she said, a little confused.

I shrugged. "It doesn't matter. She does the same thing with my nephew and my sister," I told her. "And she would do the same thing for my kids if I had any."

Santana's face softened a little and her mouth turned up into a tiny smile. "I could see why she would get excited over any kids of yours, though," she said sweetly.

I blushed but rolled my eyes a little. "Come on, let's go say hi," I said, leading the way over to my mom who was finally finishing up petting my dogs.

"Hi honey," my mom said, pulling me in for a tight hug. Once she released me she turned to my girlfriend. "And you must be Santana. It's a pleasure to have you."

Santana nodded and smiled, holding out her hand for my mom to shake. "Nice to meet you, Mrs. Pierce," she said politely. "Thanks for having me."

My mom shook Santana's hand although she gave her a look as if to say she was only doing it so Santana didn't feel uncomfortable with a hug. "Please, call me Pam," she said.

Santana smiled again and we headed into the house. Chase immediately came bounding down the hallway as he heard the dogs come in, wrapping an arm around each one's neck.

"Hi Aunt Britt!" Chase exclaimed, a huge smile on his face at being reunited with his favorite playmates.

"Hey buddy," I greeted, grinning at him. "How's my favorite nephew?"

I crouched down so he could come over and give me a hug. "Good," he said. "Thanks again for my airplane. It's so cool!"

I had gotten him a small remote control airplane for his birthday a few months ago. My sister wanted to kill me for it, but I only cared what Chase thought. And he loved it, so all was right in my world.

"Awesome! So this is my friend Santana," I told him, ruffling his dark blonde hair a little and turning to look back at my girlfriend who was watching us with a soft smile. "She's gonna eat dinner with us and hang out."

"Hi, Chase," Santana said, smiling big at him.

"Hi," my nephew said shyly, a blush spreading over his face as he greeted her.

I grinned, loving the impact Santana had on my adorable nephew. It was much the same impact she had on me the first time I met her. I could already tell she would be great with him. I imagined she would be awesome with her own kids too. I suddenly pictured raising children with her, and the image felt so right.

The dogs had waited long enough and barked to get Chase's attention. He turned and ran off to play with them, a hasty goodbye thrown over his shoulder.

"Why don't you show Santana up to your room, Brittany," my mom said. "Dinner will be ready in a few hours."

I nodded and grabbed our bags and led Santana up the stairs to my room. I set our things down and immediately fell onto the bed. Santana giggled at me and lay down more gently next to me.

"Tired babe?" Santana asked, her fingernails scratching gently on my scalp.

I hummed in pleasure at the feeling. "Yeah, I hate driving for long distances," I complained.

"You could have told me," she said. "I would have driven."

I shook my head a little. "It wouldn't matter if you did. Even just being a passenger wears me out."

She continued to play with my hair and scratch my head softly. "Well get some rest then, and we can go down in a little bit."

"Mmkay," I mumbled.

We stayed in my room for a little while before I decided that we should probably go down and visit. We met my dad as we made our way down the stairs.

"Hi, Britt," he greeted.

"Hey, dad," I returned. "This is Santana."

He nodded and held out his hand for Santana to shake. She took it and shook it firmly. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Pierce."

"Call me Rich, please," he told her. "Glad you could make it."

"Thank you for having me," she said.

My dad nodded again and excused himself to go upstairs. That went okay in my opinion. My dad wasn't very easy to get along with, and he had a hard time with strangers (much like me). I was more nervous for later, when I knew my feelings for Santana were bound to come out.

We found Bonnie and her husband in the living room. I greeted them both with a hug and introduced Santana. I could see the look of appreciation Adam gave her, but I was glad that he was fully devoted to my sister. Otherwise I would have punched him.

Bonnie and Santana got along well. Bonnie was an outgoing woman and usually didn't have any trouble talking to new people. Santana could fit in about anywhere, so I was comfortable that there wouldn't be any discomfort between those two.

I left Santana to find Chase and the dogs. They were running around in the backyard. I could see that Lady was starting to give up on the playtime. She had much less energy than Lance, but tried to keep up as long as she could. I could relate to her a lot. I called Chase in the house and told them the dogs needed a bit of a rest. He was reluctant to come in but did as I asked. The dogs eagerly ran into the kitchen where my mom had put out a bowl of water for them so they could rehydrate.

I asked my mom if she needed any help and she said yes. So I started to peel and cut up potatoes and put them in the pot to boil. I was chatting with my mom pleasantly when Santana walked in.

"Could you guys use any more help?" Santana asked a little shyly.

"Sure," my mom said with a smile. "Why don't you snap these beans."

Santana took the bowls my mom handed her and sat down at the kitchen table to get to work. I took the trash an over to her so she could put any stems or bad bits into it. She thanked me with a smile.

We worked well together, and, before I knew it, it was time to eat. The table was set and filled to the brim with turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, cranberry sauce, green beans, rolls, carrots, and stuffing. The dogs had their own special Thanksgiving treat to keep them occupied. They were in the living room gnawing on some big rawhides so they weren't begging for food from my nephew or soft-hearted mother.

Everyone enthusiastically dug into the food, showering deserved compliments on my mom for the meal. She naturally deflected them, but everyone could see she was pleased.

"So Santana," my father began, "what do you do for a living."

I groaned internally. My father was obsessed with finding out what people did as a career. He had worked his way up in the soft drink industry, ending up as a Regional Manager for years before he retired.

"I'm a lawyer," Santana replied easily.

"That must be interesting," Bonnie said. "Do you have to go to court a lot?"

Santana shook her head. "I'm not a criminal lawyer," she explained. "I do corporate law. I actually work for Baker Brothers."

"That's a big position to get for someone so young," my dad said sounding impressed. "You must be good at what you do."

Santana gave a pleased smile. "I try my best, sir," she said modestly.

He nodded in understanding. "So does your family practice law?"

Santana stiffened a little. "Dad, you don't need to interrogate her," I intervened.

"What?" He asked, a little offended. "I'm just making conversation."

"It's okay Britt," Santana told me, giving me a reassuring smile.

"San," I began, trying to protect her.

She shook her head a little at me and turned back to my dad. "I lost my parents when I was in high school."

A silence settled over the room. "I'm so sorry," my mom said, sadness clear in her voice.

Santana just gave a slightly sad smile and I put my hand comfortingly on hers which was resting on the table. My dad cleared his throat uncomfortably.

"But my brother Gabe is a hockey player," Santana finished, trying to lighten the atmosphere.

"Professionally?" My dad asked, intrigued.

"Yeah, he plays for Nashville," I told him.

His brow furrowed a little before his face cleared. "You don't mean Gabe Lopez, do you?"

"Yeah, that's him," Santana confirmed, smiling a little in pride.

"I was so mad that the Blue Jackets traded him," my dad complained. "He is a great player and I hated to see him go."

"I did, too," she said, not quite as sad as she would have been saying it a couple months ago. "I miss seeing him."

My dad was looking considerably more impressed with my girlfriend and I could tell he grudgingly liked her. She had a good career and a professional athlete brother. Not much to find fault with.

"Oh my God!" I heard my sister exclaim. I turned to see her gaze locked on my hand which was still on Santana's. I had apparently been caressing her hand with my thumb. "So that's why you weren't interested in the hockey player," Bonnie said knowingly, a smirk on her face as she nodded toward mine and Santana's linked hands.

I couldn't help but smile a little at my sister, who smiled back. Bonnie was clearly okay with it.

"What are you talking about, Bonnie?" My mom asked, confused.

"They're together, mom," my sister explained.

My mom looked at me in surprise. Santana gave my hand a reassuring squeeze and I gave my mom a little nod. She looked down at our hands and a look of realization came over her face.

"You are not serious," my dad scoffed. "She's not right, is she Brittany?"

"She is," I told him, my voice wavering with nerves. "Santana is my girlfriend."

My dad scowled. "My daughter is not a lesbian," he claimed matter-of-factly.

"Rich!" My mom admonished.

I shook my head at my dad. "No, I'm not," I said. "I'm bisexual."

My dad shook his head back at me. "You're just confused," he told me. "You've been lonely for too long and you think you have feelings for this woman. I'm sure she took advantage of you-"

"Rich! That's enough!" My mom interjected.

"No, dad. You're wrong," I said, squeezing Santana's hand and feeling her squeeze back in support. "I've known I was bisexual since I was eighteen. I just never did anything about it since I was with Sam. And I didn't tell you guys because it didn't really matter since I was always with him."

My dad frowned at me, too upset to respond.

"Are you happy, honey?" My mom asked me softly.

I turned back to her and nodded. "I'm happier than I can ever remember being," I told her. My eyes met Santana's and she looked back at me with kindness and love. I smiled at my girlfriend, feeling my nerves settle. "I'm in love with her, and she's in love with me back. She's already moved in with me and everything. She's the best thing to happen in my life."

"Then that's all I need to hear," my mom said. I turned back to my mom, who was looking at me with happiness and her own love. "I'm so glad you found someone Brittany." She turned to Santana. "And thank you so much for making her happy."

Santana nodded shyly, and I leaned over to press a kiss to her cheek.

My father made a strangled noise in his throat and stood up abruptly. "I'm finished eating," he stated. "I'm going to go watch football."

I heard an identical sigh from myself, my mother, and my sister. I wasn't really surprised that happened. I had just hoped that he had liked Santana enough to have that not happen.

"Well Britt," Bonnie said suddenly. "I'm happy for you. Not only have you found love again, but your girlfriend is gorgeous."

I grinned at my sister. "Thanks Bon."

"Congratulations," Adam told us with a smile. I smiled back.

My attention was drawn to Chase, who was sitting there in confusion. He was confused and a little upset as to why his grandfather had been angry and abruptly left the table. He was also confused as to what the deal was with me and Santana and everyone else.

"You okay buddy?" I asked him.

"What do you mean you love her?" Chase asked me.

"Well, I love her like your mommy and daddy love each other and grandma and grandpa love each other," I explained. "We go out on dates and kiss and hold hands." His face started to scrunch up in disgust at that, and I couldn't help but giggle. "Do you understand?"

He nodded. "Yeah, you do gross grown-up stuff."

"Exactly," I confirmed, and Santana tried to muffle a laugh beside me. I could tell her mind went straight to the gutter with that comment. I would chastise her later.

"Okay," my nephew said pleasantly and went back to his meal.

"Brittany, your dad will come around," my mom said, trying to reassure me.

"I know mom," I told her. "He just takes time."

The rest of the meal was spent talking about how Santana and I met and the other details my mother and sister found intriguing. They both seemed to particularly like that Santana bought me cupcakes for my birthday when we first met and that she surprised me at the hockey game. Santana was definitely on good terms with the rest of the family.

While everyone else ate pumpkin pie, Chase and I each had a piece of the chocolate cake my mom made special for us since we didn't like pie. Santana stole a bite of my cake and I sent her a mock glare. I had relaxed considerably since my dad left the room. The evening turned out to be better than I had thought it would be.

I started to get really sleepy as the night went on, so Santana and I made our excuses and made our way upstairs. I knew it wasn't the time to say anything to my dad, so we just went straight up to bed.

"Are you okay?" Santana asked me when we were cuddled up under the covers.

"Yeah," I said softly. And I was. I had gotten it off my chest. Even if my dad didn't come around, which I figured he would eventually, I had done what I needed to do. Santana was fully a part of my life and now accepted by my family.

"I'm sorry about your dad," she said, pressing a soft kiss to my shoulder.

"It's not your fault," I said. "I figured he would react that way."

"I never had to go through that when I came out," she whispered. "I mean, I knew it wasn't always easy for everyone. But I had never had to experience anything like that before. It wasn't even my family and it hurt me what he was saying."

I knew Santana was trying to tell me it was okay to be upset by how my dad reacted. And I was. But I couldn't change it and his opinion honestly didn't matter to me. He was barely home when I was growing up, always away for work or work trips. I wanted him to accept me and Santana, but if he didn't then I would live with it.

"It hurt me, too," I confessed. "But that's how he is. He should be calmer tomorrow. I'm sorry he hurt you though."

I turned and pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead. "I'm okay, Britt," she reassured me. "As long as you're okay. That's all I'm worried about."

"I'm okay, baby," I said, squeezing her tightly in my arms. "I love you."

"And I love you," she replied. We drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, after I had already woken up once to take my pill, I awoke to the smell of my mom cooking breakfast. I extricated myself from Santana's arms and tucked her wild hair behind her ear before heading downstairs.

"Morning," I greeted my mom who was at the stove cooking bacon.

"Morning," my mom said. "Where's Santana?"

"She likes to sleep in," I told her.

"You know, it makes a lot more sense now why you were okay sharing a bed," my mom said with a teasing grin.

I blushed and rolled my eyes. "Yeah, well, I can't sleep without her next to me anymore," I confessed.

"I really am happy for you," my mom said, pulling me in for a hug. "I can see how happy she makes you. I am so glad you found someone like that."

"Thanks mom," I said, overwhelmed with emotion.

We heard my dad's footsteps make their way toward the kitchen and we pulled apart. My mom turned back to the bacon, giving me and my dad a modicum of privacy.

"Hi," I said quietly.

"Hi," he replied just as quietly. He looked a little uncomfortable for a moment, then he walked over to the coffee machine and started making a pot.

"Dad," I said, getting his attention. He didn't turn around, but I knew he was listening. "I love her. I hope you can accept that and be happy for me, but I am not giving her up."

He froze for a moment before he turned back to me, shame in his eyes. "I can see how much you love her," he said. "I never saw you look at Sam quite like that. It's just… you surprised me. I never imagined you being with a woman. I've always wanted what's best for you, and I can see that, right now, she is it."

I started to smile as he paused. "I'm sorry for how I reacted yesterday," he continued, his voice sincere. "It was wrong of me to hurt you like that. And it was wrong of me to be rude to Santana. I am happy for you. But if she hurts you, then don't expect me to still like her."

I laughed a little, happy tears starting to pool in my eyes. That was my dad's backhanded way of saying he liked Santana and actually approved of her. That was high praise coming from my father.

"Thank you," I said, my voice thick. He nodded at me, and I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around him. We were never the type to hug much, so this was unusual for us. He hesitated a moment, then returned the embrace.

Santana walked in a few minutes later, the smell of coffee drawing her like a moth to a flame. I greeted her with a morning kiss and a mug of coffee just the way she liked it. It wasn't until after she took a sip that she realized that my dad was in the kitchen. She stiffened a little.

"I just wanted to apologize for my behavior last night," my dad said when he realized she was looking at him. "It was incredibly rude of me, and I realize that I overreacted. I can see how happy my daughter is with you and how much you love each other, so I just wanted to tell you that I am glad you found each other."

Santana stood frozen in surprise for a moment. She studied my father, realizing that he was being completely honest. Her face softened and she smiled gratefully. "Thank you, Rich," she said.

He gave her a small smile back and turned back to his coffee. Santana turned toward me and lifted her brows in pleased surprise. I grinned back at her, completely giddy that everything had turned out perfectly.

Breakfast was ready soon after and everyone else filed into the kitchen to grab some food. The meal turned out much more comfortably than the last, but I still couldn't wait to get back home with Santana. Back to _our_ home. I had Christmas to look forward to, and I had a lot of things I wanted to do to celebrate with my beautiful girl.

 **A/N: So Santana seemed pretty pissed that Brittany hadn't told her parents about them. But at least she seemed to understand where Brittany was coming from, especially after seeing Britt's dad's reaction. Do you guys think Brittany was justified in the way she did things? Or was it kind of messed up of her? Personally, I don't blame her for doing things how she preferred to, but that's just me...**

 **Moving in seems to have brought their own new problems for the girls. Brittany and Santana are both kind of acting strange about Santana helping out financially, and they are learning things they hadn't learned about each other before. Do you guys think they will adjust to living together pretty quickly? Or will tensions continue to run high?**

 **Santana finally met Brittany's family! It seemed to go well in the end, but was a little dicey there for a few. What did you guys think of them? Since Gabe is Santana's only family, Brittany is lucky enough that she doesn't have to go through any awkward introductions! I could only imagine how that would have gone lol**

 **Christmas is coming up next! Let me know what you guys think!**


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Santana and I had a lot of fun decorating the house for Christmas. I was delighted to discover that she loved the holiday as much as I did. We strung up lights outside and put up garland and a wreath on the door. We put up some tasteful decorations (Santana's) and some more fun decorations (mine) in the house. I spread out several cinnamon scented holiday candles around the house. It was beginning to feel a lot like Christmas.

We went out to a Christmas tree farm and picked out a gorgeous fir and brought it home. We made an evening of decorating it, combining our ornaments together to make _our_ tree and sipping hot chocolate with carols playing in the background. I hummed along while Santana sang softly. I loved her voice. It gave me goosebumps, and it made me unbelievably happy every time she would sing around me.

I got to hear her sing a lot more now that we were living together. I absolutely loved living with her. It was amazing to wake up to her every single morning and fall asleep with her every night. We were so comfortable around each other. I loved seeing her with no make-up, her hair in a messy ponytail, and relaxing in sweats. Santana looked beautiful to me no matter how she looked, but it was always special to me that she would let me see her like that. I felt comfortable enough around her to show her my worst looks and she still loved me.

I had been thinking of what I wanted to get Santana for Christmas for awhile. I knew the big gift that I wanted to get her for months, but I knew she was probably going to kill me for doing it. Oh well, I couldn't resist it.

But I needed more to give her more to open up on Christmas morning. I would have given her the world if I could have, but I settled for a few gifts instead.

We planned on spending Christmas together at our house. It was our first Christmas together, and I wanted it to be kind of special for us. My parents came down to visit us the weekend before the holiday to have a little mini-Christmas. Since my sister and her family weren't able to come back up to Ohio, my parents decided to go down to Georgia to spend Christmas Day with them. I was just glad my dad was willing to come down to celebrate with us.

It ended up being a nice get together with my parents. We exchanged gifts and my mom had even made Santana her own stocking. It was a tradition in our family that my mom made each family member their own themed stocking. Mine had a reindeer on it, for instance. My mom had made Santana's with a sleigh full of presents. It went well with my reindeer, and Santana was delighted by it.

I kind of couldn't believe that my mother had bought Santana a number of gifts since Thanksgiving. She apparently had been a busy shopper! Santana and I both got a set of comfortable pajamas from her, which was another tradition from my mom. My mom got me a gift card to the movie theater along with a comfortable sweater and a nice pair of low- heeled boots.

Santana got a gift card to the book store, a gorgeous deep red blouse, and a pair of lounge pants "for when she wants to cuddle up on the couch and read" according to my mom. My mother had learned a lot about my girlfriend already, and Santana and I were both thrilled. The gifts were perfect for Santana, and she was overwhelmed by the thought that my mom put into them.

I was surprised to see a gift for the both of us from my dad. I let Santana open the present, leaning over her shoulder to see what was inside the box. My dad looked a little uncomfortable, but not because of that. I think he was just kind of nervous to see if we would like it.

When Santana pulled out the wooden picture frame with the intricate scrollwork I let out a gasp. My dad did woodworking as a hobby, and I could tell he had made this. He must have started on it immediately after Thanksgiving to get it done on time. When my eyes settled on the elegantly engraved 'Brittany & Santana' in the frame, my eyes started to pool with tears. We thanked my dad profusely, and Santana even gave him a hug when she realized that he made the frame himself.

We took our favorite picture of us from our three month anniversary out of its current frame that night and put it into the one my dad had made for us. We displayed it on the mantel where our stockings hung.

I awoke Christmas morning to Santana's arm tightening around my waist and her nose burying in my hair falling over my neck.

"Merry Christmas baby," I croaked out, my voice groggy.

Santana giggled a little. "Merry Christmas Britt," she said, her voice sounding pretty much normal even though I know she just woke up. She inhaled and buried her nose further into my neck. "Mmm, you smell so good."

Now it was my turn to giggle. "Really?" I asked, my voice teasing. "What exactly do I smell like?"

She inhaled again and pressed a kiss to my neck before answering. "You smell like the beach," she said.

I furrowed my brow in confusion. "The beach? What do you mean?"

"Well, you smell like coconuts and like tropical flowers and sunshine," she explained.

I smiled, my fingers playing with her hand resting on my stomach. "My shampoo is coconut, so that makes sense," I said. "And the other stuff is probably my body wash."

"I know," she said, content. "But I love it."

I rolled over in her arms to face her. "I love the way you smell, too," I told her.

She smirked at me. "And how do I smell?"

I leaned forward and put my nose at the hollow of her throat, taking in a deep inhale. I hummed happily in my throat. "Yep, still vanilla and just a hint of cinnamon," I said, moving my head up to press a quick peck to her lips.

"Okay, the vanilla I understand because that's the lotion I use," she said. "But I don't know where the cinnamon comes in. Are you sure it isn't one of the candles you have lying around?"

She smiled teasingly at me. It was a joke for the past several weeks at how much cinnamon scented stuff I had around the house for the holidays. I loved cinnamon, I couldn't help it.

"I'm sure, San," I informed her. "You've always smelled a little bit like cinnamon. I love it."

She got a pleased look on her face. "Yeah?"

"Uh-huh," I said with a smile. "You always smell like a delicious dessert, and you know how much I love cinnamon."

"I didn't notice," she deadpanned. I smacked her arm lightly and she laughed. "But seriously, I have no clue how I smell like cinnamon."

I shrugged. "I dunno. Maybe it's just you," I said.

"Maybe," she agreed. She looked at me a little bashfully then. "So do you wanna get up to go open presents?"

I grinned hugely and nodded enthusiastically. "Yes!"

Santana giggled and we both excitedly got out of bed. We headed straight for the kitchen. I started making some hot chocolate for myself while Santana made some coffee. I preheated the oven to make cinnamon rolls for breakfast. While I took care of making us food, Santana went and let the dogs out. They had adjusted really well to her moving in, and were used to her helping to take care of them now. Lady had definitely fallen in love with Santana and followed her around more than Lance did. I almost felt a little betrayed.

Santana woke up a bit more after she finished her cup of coffee, and by that time the cinnamon rolls were done.

She shook her head, a crooked smile on her lips. "You and your cinnamon, babe."

I smiled playfully at her and pulled her closer to me by her hips. "Hey, they smell like you, so how can I resist them?"

She wrapped her arms around my neck and gave me a soft kiss. "I guess you can't," she teased. "But I thought you told me it was a family tradition of yours to have cinnamon rolls for breakfast on Christmas."

"It is," I confirmed. "Maybe that's why I love you so much, because you smell like Christmas to me."

She barked out a laugh, pretending to be offended. "I can't believe you say you love me because I smell like cinnamon rolls."

"That and maybe some other things," I said playfully.

"Brittany," she whined. "You better be nice. It's Christmas."

I mocked her pout a little, but made her smile after giving her a peck in apology. "Come on, let's eat breakfast and then open presents!"

We enjoyed our cinnamon rolls together. I sipped happily on my hot chocolate while Santana downed a second cup of coffee. Once we were finished we made our way into the living room where our tree sat proudly, presents filling the space underneath.

Santana agreed to let the animals get their presents first. Hopefully it would keep them out of our way while we concentrated on what we got each other. Lance and Lady both enjoyed their giant rawhides and new squeaky toys. Lord Tubbington was harder to please. The treats Santana had picked out for him were approved of, but he showed little interest in the toys we had given him. So much for trying to get him to be a little more active. He did appreciate the cat bed that I got for him. Mostly, I think, because it looked like a little throne.

It was finally time for us to exchange gifts. I had filled Santana's stocking with little things, such as candy and the lotion she liked. Santana had done the same thing for me, only with cookies and a yummy smelling bubble bath.

We decided to each open one present at a time in turn. Santana handed me my first present, and I was excited to see that it was a few movies we had talked about that we liked that I didn't have in my collection yet.

I gave Santana her first gift. She opened it to find a couple of new books she had been wanting but hadn't bought yet. She thanked me with a kiss.

My next present was a gorgeous blue dress. Santana was really awesome at picking out clothes, and I knew that this would look great on me.

I slid Santana her next present. She laughed when she opened it to find black lacy lingerie.

"What? Do you not like it?" I asked her, a little confused by her reaction. I thought she would find it sexy.

She shook her head and handed me my next wrapped box. I opened it to find a set of white lacy lingerie, much like the set I had just given her. I started to crack up myself.

"Looks like we had the same idea," I said, amused.

"Looks like it," she agreed.

I gave Santana her next present. She opened the small box to reveal a couple of charms for her bracelet.

"So I got you a music note charm because I love it when you sing," I explained. "You have an amazing voice, and it gives me chills every time I hear it. Plus, it kind of stands for the time we went to the musical for our one month anniversary." Santana smiled at me. "And I got you the heart because I obviously love you. Like, you don't understand how much."

Santana cupped my cheek and leaned in to give me a lingering kiss. "I love you, too. Will you help me put them on?"

I nodded and she held out her wrist for me to remove her bracelet. She pretty much constantly wore it, which I loved. We got the bracelet off and added the new charms, and then I refastened the bracelet back on her wrist.

"Thank you, Britt," Santana said to me, eyeing her additions on her wrist.

"You're welcome," I told her. "So I only have one present left for you, but I kind of want it to be last…"

I trailed off, letting her decide whether the last two boxes she had for me should be opened at the same time or if she wanted me to wait and do hers first.

"It's okay," she said. "These two kind of go together anyways."

I smiled and took the two small wrapped boxes she handed me. I opened the first box to find a felted jewelry box that looked like it could hold a necklace. Sure enough, I opened it to find a gorgeous diamond necklace. I looked up at her in surprise.

"San," I breathed.

"Just open the other one," she told me with a smile.

I did as she said and found matching diamond earrings. "This is too much, San," I told her, shaking my head.

"No, it isn't," she said sincerely. "I love you and I want to show you how much you mean to me. These can at least show everyone that sees you wear them that someone is incredibly, insanely in love with you."

"They must have cost a fortune," I objected.

"Britt, don't worry about the money," she chastised. "I can afford it, I assure you."

I gave up my objections and looked back down at the jewelry. "They're beautiful baby," I said gratefully instead. "Thank you so much."

"You're welcome," she said, pleased.

I set down the boxes carefully, making sure they didn't go too far from my side. I didn't want anything to happen to them.

"Okay, so here is your last gift," I said, handing her the box nervously.

She ripped off the paper and took the top off the box to reveal tissue paper taped together. There was another small charm for her bracelet taped to the front of the tissue paper. It was a small four leaf clover. She looked confused, but carefully took the charm off and I took it from her for safe keeping. She ripped the tissue paper open to find a travel guide for Ireland.

"Britt?" Santana questioned, looking up at me with suspicion.

"Open the book," I told her, fighting off a smile.

She opened the cover to find a printout of an itinerary for a two week trip to Ireland.

"Brittany, no," she said, her eyes wide as she shook her head. "This is way too much."

"It's too late, I already put a deposit on the trip," I stated. "I didn't buy the plane tickets yet since I wanted to make sure we could get those dates off of work, but we can make changes to the itinerary if we need to."

"Britt! I can't have you do this," she argued. "You shouldn't be spending money like this!"

"Why not?" I asked. "It's my money and I can spend it how I want to. I have more than enough to splurge on a trip like this, and I really want to go there with you. You said you wanted to go there back on our first date, and I would love to make that happen for us."

"I would love to go with you, too," Santana said, her eyes softening a little. "But at least let me pay for my part of it. At least the plane tickets or something."

"Nope," I said, shaking my head.

"Brittany!" Santana exclaimed. "I can cover it. Please?"

"No," I told her. "This is my present for the both of us. I am covering the trip. You don't need to worry about anything. I figure you can use your money to pay off your debts or whatever, and save up so when we go on the trip then you can pay for whatever souvenirs or things you want."

"Babe," Santana said, looking guilty. "I can afford to pay."

I shook my head at her. "No more arguing, San," I said, my voice final. "I am paying and that's it."

She sighed. "I'm not going to win, am I?"

"Nope," I said, popping the 'p' as I said it.

Santana rolled her eyes but her mouth twitched up a little in a smile. "Well thank you," she said. "The trip looks amazing."

I grinned. "We can change things if you want," I told her. "If there was anything in particular you wanted to see or not see."

We discussed the trip as I put the newest charm on her bracelet, and then we picked up the crumpled wrapping paper and took it to the trash. We gathered up our gifts and put them away. After the living room was straightened out, Santana called her brother to wish him a Merry Christmas.

I talked with Gabe for a few minutes. He was impressed with my big gift to Santana and told me that it was a good idea. He also said that he loved the presents we had sent him. To be honest, Santana had picked out most of his gifts. We sent him some clothes and a nice watch. I did pick out a few movies I thought he would enjoy though, and he seemed to like my choices.

I thanked him for the gorgeous silver bracelet he had sent me as well as the gift certificate to a really fancy restaurant downtown that he gave me and Santana for a night out. Santana spent a little bit longer talking to her brother. I could tell she missed having him there for the holidays. I only hoped that we could get the opportunity to see more of him once things settled down a bit. I missed him and I knew Santana missed him a lot more.

After she got off of the phone, we took a long bubble bath together with the new bubble bath Santana had just given me. Both of us were just content to relax in the tub with each other, giving each other the occasional kiss. But nothing went further than that.

After the bath, we got dressed and I went to start Christmas dinner. I put the ham in the oven and started to peel and cut up potatoes to start them boiling. Santana helped and got corn cooking and got rolls ready to put in the oven. Since it was just two of us, we didn't plan on making a huge feast. Once everything was cooked, we sat down to a nice quiet dinner.

I ate entirely too much and started to feel tired. It wasn't even that late yet, but all I wanted to do was cuddle with my girlfriend for the rest of the night. We put on a movie and I laid my head on Santana's lap. She started to read one of her new books while she ran her fingers through my hair. I fell asleep rather quickly.

She woke me up later to take my pill and I told her I just wanted to go to bed. I headed to the bedroom and got in my pajamas while she took care of the dogs. I was already half asleep when she crawled into bed beside me and wrapped herself around me.

The next thing I knew, I woke up incredibly hot. Santana was still cuddled up to me, but I was sweating. The back of my neck was drenched and I could feel sweat coating my torso. I felt incredibly nauseated. I kicked the covers off and hoped I could cool off, but I just started feeling hotter. The nausea worsened, and I knew I was going to be sick.

I sprung out of bed and ran into the bathroom, throwing up the toilet lid and hanging my head over the bowl. I tried taking some deep breaths to calm my stomach, but the smell of the toilet cleaner was only making it worse.

"Britt, you okay?" Santana asked, concerned, from the doorway.

I shook my head and groaned before I started to throw up.

"Oh, shit," she said, her voice full of worry before immediately coming over and kneeling beside me. She gathered my hair in her hands and held it back for me while I continued to purge my stomach.

Once I felt like I couldn't get anything else out, I flushed the toilet and stood up shakily. Santana helped me over to the sink where I rinsed my mouth out. After I spit the water out, I felt another wave of nausea hit me.

"Fuck," I muttered before quickly hanging myself back over the toilet as I started to vomit again.

Santana followed me, pulling my hair back in a hair band this time to keep it out of my face. She rubbed my back soothingly while my stomach continued to heave. I could feel my muscles starting to weaken and some of the vomit was starting to go up my nose because I didn't have enough strength to expel it fully. My nose was burning and I couldn't breathe.

Finally, the heaves stopped again and I grabbed some tissue to blow the vomit out of my nose. It stung so badly. I flushed the toilet and laid down on the cool bathroom floor.

"Are you okay?" Santana asked me, her eyes full of worry.

I shook my head again and whimpered. I was still feeling so sick and I could feel myself getting weaker as my body's immune system was overwhelmed. The vomiting was just going to make me even more weak, and if it kept up then I wouldn't be able to keep my meds in my system, which wasn't good.

I felt myself needing to throw up again, and I sprung back up to vomit. It was getting worse. I didn't even understand how I could still have anything in my stomach. Once I was finished, I was feeling slightly more settled. I got up with Santana's help and rinsed my mouth out. That's when I noticed that I did get some vomit in my hair and somehow on my shirt.

"You want me to help you shower?" Santana asked me softly.

I nodded and she helped me undress before turning on the water and helping me into the shower. She stripped and joined me. She washed my hair gently and rinsed it. She was in the process of soaping up my body when I knew I was going to be sick again. I opened the shower curtain and stepped out quickly, kneeling in front of the toilet again to throw up. It was getting harder to vomit. My stomach muscles were so weak and I could feel it getting stuck in my throat before I could get it all out.

Santana helped me up once I was done again and got me back into the shower to rinse off. She was working really hard to support me since I was getting so weak.

"I think I need to go to the hospital," I told her quietly, my voice strained as I fought to get the words out.

"Okay," she said shakily. She was so scared but I didn't know how to make her feel better.

She helped me out of the shower and sat me on the toilet and dried me off. She got me some sweats and helped me dress. We had to pause once so I could throw up again. Finally I was dressed and leaning heavily on Santana to walk to the car.

"Babe, I'm sorry I can't carry you," she said, her voice fighting off tears. "I need you to try to walk a little."

I realized that I was kind of being dragged by her. I forced my feet to shuffle a bit more, but it was hard. We finally got me into the car, and Santana put a bucket in my lap.

She went back and grabbed a coat for herself and our purses before hopping in the car and taking me to the nearest hospital. It was really only about a ten minute drive, especially at this time of night, but I ended up using the bucket on the way. She asked if she wanted me to pull over, but I told her we would never make it if we stopped every time.

Finally, we pulled up to the hospital and were helped into the emergency room. Santana told them we were there and asked for another vomit receptacle. She handed me a fresh one which I promptly dirtied while she went to go clean the bucket we brought.

I was completely fucking miserable. I was hanging my head over the bucket, hiding my face from the disgusting looks I was sure I was receiving. Santana returned shortly and switched the bucket out again. Thankfully, however, once she did that we were taken immediately to the back. Apparently I looked horrible enough to warrant immediate attention.

The nurse got my vitals and pertinent information, which Santana answered most of since I was still trying not to puke. They helped me from the wheelchair onto a bed, and once I laid down I immediately sat back up and pulled the bucket to me to puke again.

The nurse inserted an IV into my arm and immediately hooked me up to a bag of fluids. She injected an antiemetic to hopefully curb my vomiting. It didn't work.

After two more different types of antiemetics, bloodwork, and a chest x-ray to ensure I didn't aspirate any vomit into my lungs, I was able to be moved to a private room. It was now nearly 7 o'clock in the morning and either they had finally gotten a drug that worked or I had nothing left in my body to try to get out.

My body was exhausted. I slept a few hours after I was able to stop vomiting, and Santana sat with me the whole time in the ER. I knew she must be exhausted as well. The doctor said I wasn't weak enough to warrant any injectable medication for my myasthenia gravis, and as long as I continued to not vomit for the rest of the day then I could start taking my pills again.

I was a bit out of it when they moved me to my private room. I only noticed Santana wasn't there when I was wheeled in and the nurse asked if I needed anything else. I asked for Santana, and was told that visiting hours didn't start until 9 o'clock, so Santana wasn't allowed in my room yet. The nurse assured me that my girlfriend was still at the hospital and will be in to see me as soon as it was allowed. I hated that, but I was too tired to argue and I fell asleep.

When I woke up next, my girlfriend was brushing my hair off of my forehead.

"Hey, baby," I said weakly.

"Hi, sweetie," Santana said softly. She gave me a tiny smile, but I could see the fear in her eyes.

"I'm sorry," I said, tears stinging my eyes. I absolutely hated the fact that I made her worry so much. I usually didn't get sick, but when I did, I did it full out. But I hadn't gotten sick quite like this before. I was really dehydrated and being pumped full of fluids. My body was weak due to lack of my medication in my system, but I mostly just had trouble moving. I was going to need help to go to the bathroom and get back in bed, but I could still breathe okay and swallow.

"You scared me," Santana told me, caressing my cheek with her thumb.

"I know," I said, my voice thick with emotion and due to difficulty of speaking due to my myasthenia gravis. "I didn't mean to."

"Oh, sweetie, I know you didn't," Santana reassured me. "Just please, don't do it again."

I gave a little laugh. "I'll do my best."

She gave me a real smile then, her eyes looking at me so tenderly. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I said. "Did you get any sleep?"

Santana shook her head. "I couldn't sleep down there, and then I didn't want to go home."

"San, go home and sleep," I told her. "I'm doing okay now, and there isn't much you can do for me. Take a nap and come back later. Hopefully by that time I will be okay to go home."

"I don't want to leave you," Santana argued.

"Seriously, there isn't anything you can do. All they are doing is pumping me full of fluids and making sure I don't get any worse. Go home, take care of the dogs, and take a nap," I said.

Santana's eyes widened, worry crossing her face. "Oh, shit! I totally forgot about the dogs," she said. "Do you think they made a mess in the house?"

"Probably not," I reassured her. "But they are probably worried since they've never spent the night at home alone."

"Are you sure you'll be okay if I leave?" Santana asked, still apprehensive to leave me.

"I promise," I told her honestly. "Come back later and we can find out what's going on then. Besides, I am still really tired and probably am just gonna sleep now anyways."

"Okay, Britt," she gave in. "Get some rest and I will see you later."

I nodded weakly. "I will. Love you."

"Love you, too," she responded and pressed a kiss to my forehead.

I did fall asleep pretty much right after Santana left. I woke up when the nurse came in to draw more blood and check on me. I had her help me to the bathroom to pee. I was surprised that this was the first time I had needed to go since they had given me several liters of fluids since I was brought in last night. Guess I was really dehydrated.

I went back to sleep after that and was woken up when the doctor came around. He told me that it looked like I had a bad case of norovirus, and that my bloodwork showed that my potassium levels were pretty low. He said that, if I continued to not throw up until dinner time, then they would give me some bland food and I could be restarted on my pills. He also said that I needed to be given potassium to bring my levels back up, otherwise I would continue to feel really weak even if my myasthenia gravis was being treated.

Unfortunately, he told me that I would be staying the night due to how much potassium they needed to give me over a period of time. That meant that Santana and I would have to spend the night apart. I assured him that I understood what he told me, and the nurse came in to hook up a potassium drip onto my IV.

The potassium helped me feel a bit better, but my weakness didn't improve much. I still needed help going to the bathroom and even sitting up was a major chore. I was supremely grateful for the controls on the bed. I didn't sleep much more throughout the day. Santana came back in the afternoon, and I gave her the bad news.

"Sweetie, if the doctor says you have to stay the night then you definitely need to stay the night," she told me.

"But I feel bad that you will be by yourself at home," I whined.

"And I feel bad that you will be alone in the hospital," she said, a pout on her face. "But I promise I will be fine, and you need to get better before you can come home."

I pouted myself, but I understood that she and the doctor were right. She visited with me until they brought me dinner. I got a plain chicken breast and a roll with some broth and water. I ate a little bit of it as it was a little difficult to swallow due to my weakness, but thankfully didn't feel the slightest bit nauseated afterwards. The doctor came around again after dinner and said I could go ahead and start my pills again. I was incredibly happy that I could start my medication again.

Santana stayed until the end of visiting hours and we watched crappy television. Gabe called to check on me, as did my parents and sister. My mom and dad were worried about me, but Santana had reassured them that it wasn't necessary for them to come back up to Ohio. Once they talked to me they finally calmed down.

I reluctantly said goodbye to Santana when she had to go, but I was already feeling stronger. I was able to start going to the bathroom by myself in the middle of the night, and by the next morning I was almost back to normal. The doctor said my potassium levels were still a little bit low after my morning bloodwork, so after a little bit more I would be able to go home.

Santana and I were extremely relieved to take me home in the late afternoon. The dogs went crazy when they saw me. Santana took me straight to bed and cuddled up with me and watched movies. She was an extremely patient and awesome nurse. She made me chicken noodle soup, but apologized that it wasn't homemade like mine was. I didn't even care. I fell even more in love with her for how she took such good care of me. I truly had the perfect girlfriend.

 **A/N: Sorry for having so much vomiting in there, but it was kind of necessary to show how badly Brittany does get sick when she is ill. It was Santana's turn to take care of Brittany, but it was also necessary to show that it can be a very serious thing when Brittany is sick. I hinted at it before when Santana was so worried about Brittany being around her when she was ill before, but I don't think Santana would have gotten how serious it can be unless she saw it first-hand.**

 **Anyways! They had a pretty good Christmas, until Brittany started puking... at least they got through everything first! It looks like Brittany's dad has fully come around and accepts their relationship. Maybe I could go as far as to say that he likes Santana and likes Brittany with her? It also seems like Santana and Brittany's tension from the last chapter has gone away for the most part. They have adjusted to living together pretty well.**

 **What do you think of their gifts for each other? Do you think Brittany went overboard with the trip? And why is she so stubborn about Santana paying for anything? And why does Santana just continue to let it go when Brittany won't let her?**

 **Let me know what you guys think! What big thing do you think will happen next?**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

I only had to miss a couple of days of work for being sick. The day after Christmas while I was in the hospital was a Friday, and I was still recuperating Monday so I called out. Santana took off Friday since I was in the hospital, but I made her go in on Monday. She wasn't too happy about it, but I told her she shouldn't miss another day because of me.

I was feeling a lot better come New Year's Eve, so Santana took me out dancing. It gave me a good opportunity to wear the new dress she got me for Christmas. Instead of going out to a nightclub, we went to a nice little jazz club and I was able to show off some different dancing skills. It was amazing to be able to slow dance with my girlfriend throughout the night.

It was even more amazing to share a kiss with her as the clock struck midnight. We had the promise of a whole new year ahead of us. I had a feeling it was going to be a big year. The past year had been the best one I ever had. I hoped the new one was going to be even better.

I took Santana out for Valentine's Day. We went to a restaurant near Polaris and we exchanged some small gifts. I got her a box of chocolates (cliché, I know) and she sent me some red and white roses at work.

"Wow, she must really love you," Gus told me when he saw them.

"What do you mean?" I asked, sensing he meant more than just the fact that she bought me expensive flowers.

"You don't know the meaning of flowers, do you?" Gus asked me with a knowing smile.

I shook my head. "Look it up," he told me.

So I did. I discovered that red roses meant love, and white roses meant purity and innocence, but red and white roses together meant unity. Santana felt that we truly belonged together. After doing more research, I realized that Santana had been telling me how she felt since the beginning. The first red rose she gave me after the first time we made love was her telling me that she loved me, and every one ever since was further proof of that.

And the purple rose she gave me on our one month anniversary stood for love at first sight. Santana was saying that she had strong feelings for me since we first met. I can't believe I never looked it up before. No wonder why she found it amusing when I said I had no clue about flowers when I gave her that flower charm for her birthday.

My birthday was rapidly approaching. I had mixed feelings about turning 28. It was one year closer to 30, and I wasn't sure if I was ready for that.

"Is there anything special you want for your birthday, babe?" Santana asked as we were cuddled in bed. We had just finished making love, and Santana was running her fingers through my hair as my head lay on her chest.

I thought about something I had been wanting for awhile, but I had never been sure how to bring it up before. I was incredibly nervous, but she had given me a really good opening to talk about it.

"Well, there is something I would kind of like," I began.

"What is it?" Santana asked me, her fingers scratching gently on my scalp. I practically purred at the tingles she was sending down my spine. She was helping me to relax without realizing I needed it.

"Um, well I've noticed that you and I don't really have a lot of, um… toys," I said, my mouth a little dry.

Santana's fingers froze in my hair. "Uh, I guess," she said hesitantly. "Um… were you wanting something like that?"

"Well, I have been thinking about something for awhile, but I don't know if you would be into it," I said nervously.

"Okay," she said. "I mean, I would probably be up for most things with you, but I guess you can tell me what it is and we can see."

I lifted my head up from her chest to look at her. I could see a little bit of nerves in her eyes. "Are you sure? Because you don't really seem okay," I said, not wanting her to do something she wasn't into just for me.

"I guess I just want to know if like I am not satisfying you or something," she mumbled, averting her eyes from me.

"Oh, baby, no it isn't like that," I quickly reassured her. "You satisfy me every single time, which I find to be freaking amazing. I mean, Sam sure as hell never did."

I smiled at her, and she smiled back when she could see how sincere I was being. Her smile turned into a smirk. "I try my best," she said playfully.

"Your best is damn good," I told her. "I just want to try some new things with you."

"Okay, I understand," she said. "So what is it you want to try?"

I bit my lip, looking down at her chin to avoid her probing gaze. "Uh, I wanna get a strap-on," I mumbled quietly.

"What?" I didn't know if the question was one of surprise or if she actually didn't hear me since I still hadn't looked up at her.

"I want to get a strap-on," I repeated a little louder.

"Wow," Santana breathed. "Uh… wow. Like, you want me to use one on you?"

I could have giggled at her nervousness, but I was still pretty nervous myself. "Well… that would be nice," I said. "But I really want to get one so I can use it on you."

"Oh," she said abruptly. I looked up at her to see her looking at me with wide eyes. She clearly hadn't been expecting that.

"Would that be something you would be okay with?" I asked, searching her eyes to make sure she was being honest with me.

"I can honestly say that the idea is kind of hot," she explained. "But it has been a long time since I had anything like that inside of me. Like, since I had sex with guys a few times in high school. I've used a strap-on a couple times with other girls, but I've always been the one giving and not receiving."

I could swear I could see the hint of redness in her cheeks from embarrassment. It was cute.

"Okay. So does that mean you don't want to try it?" I asked for clarification.

"I'm not saying that," she said, her expression guarded. "I guess I am trying to say that the idea makes me nervous."

"I get that," I said honestly. "I mean, we could get one and see how it goes and if it something you really can't do, then you could just always use it on me. But I have had this fantasy for a long time of fucking you like that."

I saw the spark of desire light her eyes at my words. She nodded jerkily at me. "Okay. We can try it."

I grinned and kissed her. The kiss quickly turned passionate and we ended up making love again.

The next morning was a Saturday and I decided to get Santana out to the sex shop to pick out a good strap-on for us.

"Where exactly are we going Britt?" Santana asked me when I told her we needed to go out.

"Uh, just doing some errands," I said evasively.

Santana narrowed her eyes at me but didn't say anything as she got in the car. I did stop a few places to pick up a few things that I did actually need to get. I figured it would be better to do that than drive straight to the sex shop. Santana got uncomfortable when I pulled into the parking lot of the store.

"Brittany, what are we doing here?"

I looked at her and she was biting her lip, her eyes apprehensive. I grabbed her hand in my own and brought it up to my mouth to kiss it.

"We are going to look and see if we can find anything that may look good for us," I explained. "And just remember, if you don't feel comfortable then we can just use it on me. Okay?"

She nodded and took a deep breath before opening the car door. I followed her into the shop and we began to look around. Thankfully we were ignored by the employee and were left to look at the accessories in peace. Santana loosened up after we made a few jokes about some of the things we saw in there. I mean, I seriously could not understand how in the hell some people could actually use some of the items we found. I was torn on whether to laugh or shudder in horror.

After some time and discussion, we picked out a fairly standard harness that we could use a variety of dildos with. We decided on an average sized dildo to start with. We figured that we could experiment more if things went well and maybe get some larger ones or whatever. I was excited to try it out, and I thought Santana was getting excited about it as well. We got a bottle of lube and checked out and headed back home.

That night as we got in bed, Santana started to make out with me. I could sense some nervousness in her kisses though, so I pulled back and looked deep in her eyes.

"You okay?" I asked.

She nodded and leaned in to kiss me again. I gave her a quick peck before I pulled back again.

"Hey, just relax," I told her reassuringly. "I am not going to use it tonight."

She looked at me with a mixture of surprise and relief. "But I thought you wanted to," she said softly.

I shook my head. "Not tonight," I explained. "I don't want to rush you into it. Besides, I really kind of want to do it for my birthday."

She laughed a little at me. "Well I guess I can make sure you have one hell of a birthday then, huh?"

I smirked at her. "Fuck yeah," I said, my expression softening into sincerity. "But only if it is something you're okay with."

"I know, sweetie," she said softly. "I know."

She leaned in to kiss me again and this time I didn't hesitate in reciprocating.

My birthday was on us before I knew it. Santana decided to make dinner for me instead of taking me out. She said that it was more thoughtful than picking a restaurant.

"It smells really good in here, San," I said as I walked into the kitchen.

I had just gotten home from work. I had started a new project with Gus, so we were working a little late on it. Santana had left work a little early to get started on my birthday dinner as well.

"Thanks, Britt," she said, turning to greet me with a smile.

I walked up to her and gave her a firm kiss in greeting. I cupped her cheek and caressed it gently with my thumb before I pulled back. I looked into her eyes and saw the love and happiness there. I knew mine mirrored hers. I couldn't help but think my life was truly perfect.

"So what are you making?" I asked, taking a look at the variety of pots and pans on the stove.

"Cherry glazed pork roast with some sautéed zucchini and rice pilaf," she said proudly.

I gave her an impressed look. "Sounds fancy," I said. "And it smells delicious, so I'm sure it will be wonderful."

"I hope so," she said as she turned back to the stove to stir the zucchini.

"I'm going to go change real quick," I told her. She nodded at me and I went off to the bedroom to get into something a little more comfortable than my work clothes.

I gave the dogs some love on my way back to the kitchen. Santana had pulled the pork out of the oven and it was now resting on a platter. The table was already set, and Santana had poured herself a glass of wine and put a glass of water on the table for me.

"Everything looks amazing, baby," I told her honestly.

She smiled again at me as she carried the rest of the food over to the table. She indicated to me to sit down and she joined me. I complimented her immensely on the meal. It was really delicious. Usually I did most of the cooking since I was home earlier than her, but she knew her way around the kitchen when she wanted to or needed to cook.

After we finished dinner, I helped her clear the table and do the dishes. Once that was done, she grabbed a familiar looking bakery box off of the refrigerator and I couldn't help my smile as we went back over to the table.

"Happy birthday, Brittany," she said, opening the box and my memory shot to a year ago when she did and said the same exact thing. I never could have guessed we would be doing this that day last year.

Naturally, the box had cupcakes from Kyle's bakery in them. I grinned at the shamrocks and leprechauns decorating them.

"Is he going to do these for St. Patrick's day?" I asked with a giggle.

Santana chuckled, pulling out a cupcake after I grabbed one. "I don't know, but he probably should," she said. "I asked him to do this in honor of our trip next month."

I nodded in understanding, pleased that Santana was as excited for our upcoming vacation as I was. We had decided to stick with the original dates I had set for our trip. Santana was able to take time off of work, and I hadn't taken a vacation since I started at my job, so I had plenty of time. We looked at the things we could do when we were over there, and we set up an itinerary of what we both would like. I couldn't wait.

"It's perfect, baby," I said.

The cupcakes were delicious, and after we finished up we went into the living room to relax. Santana had my present on the mantel and she got it down for me. I read the sweet card filled with words of love before I opened the small box.

"San, it's gorgeous," I breathed. I pulled out a beautiful watch. It had a thin silver band and was decorated with crystals.

Santana gave me a soft smile. "I figured you could have something nice to wear to keep an eye on what time it is so you don't forget to take your medication," she said teasingly.

"I thought that's what I had you for," I teased. "Something beautiful to remind me when to take my pill."

She rolled her eyes at me. "If you don't need it then, I guess I can take it back."

I pulled the watch to my chest protectively. "No, I love it!" I protested. "You can't have it back."

"Okay then," she gave in easily, leaning in to kiss me softly.

"Thank you," I told her, looking lovingly into her eyes. "I love you."

"I love you too babe," she replied. "Happy birthday."

We relaxed for a bit on the couch. Santana told me she needed to do something really quick and then she would be right back. She was gone for several moments before she called for me.

"Yeah?" I asked from the couch.

"Can you come here for a minute?"

I frowned, wondering what the problem was. I walked back into the bedroom to find Santana laid out on the bed in the lingerie I got her for Christmas. There were several candles lit, and the strap-on we bought was resting in easy reach on the nightstand. My eyes widened and my mouth dropped open.

"Santana?" I was definitely surprised. I knew I wanted to do this tonight, but I wasn't expecting her to set all of this up. I gulped nervously. "Are you sure?"

She nodded, her eyes hooded. I could see a mixture of nerves and desire, and it was definitely what I was feeling. "Come here, Britt."

I made my way over to the bed. Santana sat up to meet me. She pulled me to her, putting a leg on either side of my hips.

"You're so beautiful," I husked, my eyes raking over her scantily clad figure. She was seriously the sexiest woman I had ever seen in my life. I would never get tired of looking at her or being amazed that I got to look at her like this.

"Let's get this off of you," she whispered, tugging on the hem of my shirt.

I grasped it and tugged it over my head. Santana's eyes darkened and traveled over my shirtless torso. She ran her hands up my stomach and cupped my bra covered breasts. My head fell back and I moaned.

"Fuck, Tana," I groaned.

Santana snickered before she leaned in to press soft kisses to my stomach. My muscles twitched under her lips and I looked back down at her, threading my fingers through her hair. I loved doing that. I didn't know what it was about it that I loved so much, but having my fingers in her hair, either holding her head or just combing them through it, was one of my most favorite things. I fucking loved her hair.

Her hands tucked into the waistband of my jeans, sliding their way around to the button. She unsnapped it, then tugged my zipper down. Her hands snuck back into the waistband and pulled them down over my hips and legs. I stepped out of my pants and climbed onto the bed straddling Santana's hips.

Santana leaned back, falling onto the bed and I followed her down to bring our mouths together. We kissed heatedly, our tongues seeking each other out and fighting for dominance. Santana's hands went around my back to unclasp my bra. I sat up and removed it, dropping it to the floor. My hands started to roam over Santana's body, my eyes following them as they moved. Santana's body arched into my touch and goosebumps spread over her skin.

"I need you naked," I whispered.

Santana lifted her hips as my fingers hooked into the waistband of the black lacy panties and I tugged them off. They joined my bra on the floor. I slid my hands under her back and she arched up so I could undo the matching bra to her panties. I made quick work of it and she lay before me completely naked.

"So beautiful," I repeated breathlessly.

Santana wet her lips, and my eyes fixed onto her mouth. I started to kiss her deeply again. She moaned as my hands massaged her bare breasts, pinching her nipples between my fingers. I wanted her to enjoy every bit of this, so I took my time. But I did want to try out our toy.

Once she was writhing beneath me, I pulled back and got off of the bed. I slid my panties off and grabbed the toy. I had practiced putting it on a few times before so I knew exactly how to do everything, so I was able to get it on quickly. Santana watched me closely. I could see the nerves creeping back into her eyes.

I crawled back onto the bed. Santana's eyes kept flicking down to the toy strapped to my hips. I tucked my fingers under her chin and tilted her gaze up to meet mine.

"Relax," I said softly.

Santana nodded, and I could see the tension leave her body as she looked into my eyes. I kissed her gently and then let my lips trail down her body. Her breathing picked up as my mouth travelled over her skin. I moved down and settled myself between her legs, kissing up her thighs before dragging my tongue through her wetness.

Santana sucked in a breath as my tongue found her clit. She released it shakily as I circled it and started to work her up. I slid a finger inside of her, delighting in how wet she was for me already. I thrust in and out a few times before adding a second one.

"Fuck, Britt," she moaned, her breathing becoming rapid.

I continued to tongue her clit as I pumped my fingers in and out. She was becoming much more comfortable, her mind completely removed from the strap-on. I decided to add a third finger, sliding it in to open her up even more for me.

"Shiiiit," she groaned, her head falling back.

I was pumping in and out and she was even more wet. I decided she was more than ready.

I removed my mouth from her but continued to use my fingers inside of her as I slid back up her body. I hovered over her, settling my hips between hers. I pulled my fingers out and rubbed her juices over the silicone member, then grasped it and slid it up and down her folds.

She twitched a little at the contact and she bit her lip. I positioned the toy at her entrance. "Are you ready?" I asked.

She nodded, still breathing rapidly. I started to push into her gently. The tip pushed past her entrance and Santana's eyes locked onto mine. I could see a combination of pleasure, surprise, and nerves. I kept my eyes on hers and started to push even further in, but slowly. I rocked my hips gently, allowing the toy to slide in even further every time until I sunk in all the way.

I watched as her eyes no longer showed any nerves and instead showed nothing but pleasure.

"You okay?"

"Yeah," she husked, her nails scratching lightly up and down my back. "Are you gonna fuck me now or what?"

My eyes involuntarily shut and I shuddered as pleasure shot through me. The fact that Santana was baiting me into fucking her with the toy she was obviously now enjoying was a huge turn on. I reopened my eyes and looked back at Santana, who was gazing at me with hunger.

I pulled out a little and thrust slowly back in. Santana's hands went to my hips and she wrapped her legs around mine. I started a slow pace to start with, trying to get used to the movement. Once I felt pretty comfortable with it, I sped up a little and was rewarded with a moan.

It wasn't exactly easy to keep a steady rhythm, but I did my best. I got more comfortable with it and Santana was biting her lip beneath me in pleasure, her hips rocking up to meet my thrusts. I changed positions a little, spreading Santana's legs wider and I went even deeper.

"Fuck!" Santana whimpered, her head rolling back and her fingers digging into my hips.

I apparently hit a good spot, so I did my best to keep hitting it. Santana was moaning practically non-stop, her fingers tightening almost painfully and I knew I must have continued to hit the right spot. I picked up my pace and was thrusting in and out quickly, the sound of skin slapping skin joining in with my pants and Santana's moans.

I lost my rhythm a bit as I started to get a little tired, so I slowed down. I adjusted myself so I was more up on my knees, and I pulled one of Santana's legs over my shoulder and rocked my hips slowly in and out of her. The harness was rubbing my clit deliciously, and the sight of Santana spread out like this below me was driving me crazy.

"Jesus, Britt," Santana groaned, her eyes finding mine again.

"You like that, Tana?" I asked, my voice husky. "You like me fucking you like this?"

"Yeah," she whimpered, nodding in agreement.

"You want me to make you come fucking you like this, baby?"

"Uh-huh," she moaned.

I brought my hand down in between us and started to rub her clit as I continued to thrust in and out of her slowly.

"Shit!" Santana cried out.

I could feel her tightening around the toy as it started to tug at my hips and rub even more at my clit. I thrust my hips up a little and Santana's eyes popped open wide and her jaw dropped, an adorably sexy squeak coming out. I knew enough about Santana's body to know that whatever I did felt really fucking good, so I did it again and Santana's body started to shiver.

I rubbed her clit faster but kept up the same motion with my hips.

"Oh God, oh God, oh God," Santana whimpered.

I stopped rubbing her clit as I could tell Santana was really close, and I grabbed her hip to pull her harder into me on every thrust. I leaned forward and started to fuck her faster and harder. Santana's body started to become taut underneath me, and I kept it up until she screamed out her release.

I continued to pound into her until I felt her fingers start to relax on my hips, and then I slowed down to a slow rocking as she continued to ride out her orgasm. She took in a shaky gasp as her back relaxed onto the bed and I stopped moving. I put her leg down off of my shoulder and I stretched out to lie on top of her, exhausted. I kissed her face gently, until she turned toward me and brought our lips together.

"How was that?" I asked playfully.

She gave me a tired grin. "That was fucking amazing," she said enthusiastically.

"I have to say, it was definitely incredibly sexy," I told her. "Thank you for my birthday present."

She giggled. "I feel like I should be thanking you. God, who knew that the blushing, shy, quiet girl I met a year ago would turn out to be this awesome sex goddess?"

I grinned at her and gave her another peck. I slid out of her slowly. She shuddered a little at the movement and I almost thrust back into her to see what she would do, but I was honestly too tired to do that again. I removed the harness and set it aside before I lay back down next to her.

"Well, you know they say it's the quiet ones you have to watch out for," I teased.

She laughed. "Trust me babe, you aren't quiet for me," she teased back. "Did you come?" Santana's hand started to caress my side.

I shook my head. I had been concentrating too much on making Santana feel good that I didn't think too much about my own pleasure. It had felt really good, but my mind wasn't on me.

She frowned a little. "Was it not good?"

"No, it was amazing," I reassured her. "I just was more interested in making you like it than me."

Her face relaxed before forming into a sensual smile. "Then I guess I have a little bit more of a birthday present to give you," she husked.

I giggled as her mouth started to suck on my neck, and then I moaned as she hit the spot on my neck that drove me crazy. Her mouth worked over my neck and down to my collarbone. She paid attention to my breasts, sucking on the flesh and teasing my nipples with her lips and tongue.

I gasped as her fingers slid through my soaked folds.

"Mmm, you're so wet," she moaned into my skin.

I couldn't even answer. I was being driven crazy by this woman. Her mouth trailed lower until she was settled between my spread thighs. Her mouth pressed against my wetness briefly before her tongue slid from my entrance to my clit. A shudder racked my body and my thighs quivered.

Her tongue circled my clit, flicking it up every once in awhile before returning to circles. My hips started to rock up toward her mouth and she pinned them in place with one arm. Her other arm snaked between my thighs and thrust two fingers into me suddenly.

"Oh my… _fuck_!" I cried out.

My head fell back and my hands went to Santana's head to thread my fingers into her hair and hold her head in place as she started to suck my clit. Her fingers thrust in and out of me quickly while she continued to suck and flick my clit. She curled her fingers and I lost my breath.

My orgasm hit me hard and unexpectedly. My mouth was open in a silent scream, my breath gone as I came intensely. Santana held her fingers still as her mouth continued to work against my clit. Just as I started to come back down and I took in a ragged breath, Santana started to flick against my clit rapidly with her tongue and thrust her fingers in and out again quickly. She sent me spiraling up into another orgasm, all of my breath lost again as I screamed out in pleasure.

I felt like I was never going to come down, but eventually I was able to breathe again, albeit shakily. My body relaxed and was pretty much done for the night. I collapsed onto the bed, exhausted. Santana pressed a final kiss to my thigh and slid her fingers out of me before she crawled back up my body.

"I love you," I whispered, breathless, once her face hovered over mine.

She smiled lovingly down at me. "I love you, too."

She leaned down and gave me a soft, lingering kiss before she lay down next to me. I turned my head, about all of my effort put into that motion, just to keep looking into her eyes. "Best birthday ever," I enthused with as much energy as I could muster.

 **A/N: Soooo, yeah. There's some smut for you all... Brittany's definitely out of her shyness with Santana. And the quiet ones always surprise you ;)**

 **You finally found out what the meanings behind the flowers Santana gave Brittany were. So the purple flower she was acting so strange about was because it was her pretty much confessing that she had started falling for Brittany from the beginning. But Britt didn't know anything about flowers, so love confessions were put on hold for awhile lol. They eventually got there, but imagine if Brittany had known what that flower meant when she first got it!**

 **It looks like they've gotten pretty settled into living together and are doing well in their relationship. Lots of things to look forward to! I know that there wasn't much that happened this chapter, so I apologize for that. But let me know what you think! I also want to say thank you to all of the guests who are taking the time to review the story too! I appreciate you reading and commenting, even if I can't message you back!**

 **As a little aside, this week has been insane for me, as I had to cover somebody else's job as well as my own at work and things just kept popping up and I didn't have much time to do anything, much less write. So I am way behind where I would like to be with my new story. I am working on it though! I just don't know how much writing I will be able to get done over the next couple of weeks, which means I may have a little bit of a break in between posting my stories which I hate to do to you guys. But I will make it up to you!**


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

"Did you get your shampoo out of the shower?" I asked Santana, throwing some of my clothes into the open suitcase on the hotel bed. We were packing our suitcases to get ready to head home after spending two glorious weeks in Ireland.

"Yeah," Santana replied. "Do you have our passports in your purse?"

I was pretty positive that I had put them in there, but I double checked anyways. "Yep, they're in there."

I finished zipping up my suitcase just as I felt Santana's arms snake around my waist, her breasts pressing into my back. I leaned back into her, covering her arms with mine.

"I don't want to go back home today," Santana said, her voice almost a whine.

I pouted, turning my head to look at her. She had her own adorable pout, so I turned in her arms and wrapped mine around her. "Me neither, baby," I said. "But, as much as we may want to, we can't stay here forever."

"But I want to," she argued, her plump lower lip jutted out. I leaned in and sucked it between mine, running my tongue over it and making Santana inhale sharply.

"And I want you," I husked against her lips.

"Britt, we don't have time," she protested. Her arms pulled me in closer to her body though, in direct contradiction to her words.

"But San, I really want you," I pouted.

Her eyes turned dark and she gave a low chuckle. "We definitely don't have time if you are in that kind of mood," she told me with a smirk.

I gave her a confused look. "What do you mean?"

"You are in a teasing mood, which means we can't have a quickie which is what we would need in order to get to the airport on time."

My confusion grew. "I am not!" I protested. "And even if I was, how would you know that?"

She laughed at my confusion. "You called me San," she said, as if that explained everything. When it became obvious that it made no sense to me, she continued, her eyes sparkling. "You call me San when you are in a playful, teasing mood and want to drag it out. You call me Tana when you wanna fuck."

I shivered as her voice went low when she said that. Her eyes locked onto mine and she gave me a soft smile. "And you call me Santana when you want to make love slowly," she finished.

My heart fluttered at the way she said the words. She said them so softly and full of love. God, it made me love her so much.

But then I thought about what she said and I frowned. Was I really that obvious? I couldn't be.

"I do not," I argued.

She laughed at me, and I pouted. I pulled out of her arms and crossed my arms over my chest, feeling embarrassed that I was so predictable.

"Aww, Britt, don't pout," she said amused. "And you totally do."

She stepped toward me and grasped my wrists, pulling my arms apart. I resisted at first, but she persisted and I let her open my arms. She stepped into me and looped my arms around her neck. I bit my lip and I could feel the slight burn of a blush crossing my cheeks.

"Babe, you have nothing to be embarrassed about," she said, searching my eyes. "It just shows how much I know you and love you because I pay attention to every little thing about you."

My mouth started to turn up into a smile. It was true. As I thought about it, there were so many little quirks and habits that I had learned about Santana. I smirked as I realized something.

"You do the same thing, you know," I told her.

She frowned in confusion. "What do I do?"

"You do certain things depending on what you want to do," I explained. "For instance, you scratch your nails down my back when you want to fuck. You kiss on my neck when you want to tease me. And you play with the hair at the nape of my neck when you want to make love."

Her frown grew. "No, I don't," she protested.

It was my turn to giggle. "Yeah, you do," I said teasingly. "But don't worry, because it just shows how much I know you and love you that I picked up on it."

Santana rolled her eyes at me, and I leaned in and pressed a peck to her pouted lips. "So what does it mean I want to do when I call you baby?" I asked, genuinely curious.

She bit her lip. "I don't know," she replied. "I haven't picked up a pattern yet."

I smiled at her, pleased. "I guess we still have some things to learn about each other then."

"I look forward to learning everything about you, Brittany," she said sincerely.

I did, too. But first, we needed to get home. We really did need to hurry to get to the airport on time. So we gathered our things and headed out, albeit reluctantly.

The flight home was long, and I was tired, but I was too busy thinking about the past two weeks to fall asleep. The trip had been the most incredible vacation I had been on in my life. Ireland was amazingly beautiful. Santana and I had spent time driving around, viewing stunning scenery and breathtaking castles. After some frustration with trying to remember to drive on the other side of the road (Santana yelled at me a couple of times when I turned into the wrong lane) and despite getting lost a few times (Santana was not the best navigator, surprisingly), the trip was truly magical.

The best part for me had been when we were driving around the Ring of Kerry, which was the most beautiful place I think I ever could have pictured. We had stopped at one spot and Santana was looking out on the coast at the waves of the ocean crashing onto the rocks of the beach. The wind was whipping her hair and she had such a look of happiness and contentment on her face.

As I looked at her, I felt this overwhelming feeling of rightness settle over me. Being with her felt like it was the most right thing in the world to me. I knew in that moment that we belonged together forever.

Santana turned to look at me and she grinned, a look of love evident in her eyes as she smiled at me. My heart pounded as I realized that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this beautiful woman. I knew exactly what I wanted to do, and the thought both made me excited and fearful at the same time.

I made myself a plan that I set into motion pretty much the instant I got home. I took advantage of my work computer to start getting some ideas since I didn't want Santana to see. But I knew I needed help, so I called my reinforcements.

"Britt!" Gabe exclaimed when he picked up the phone.

"Hey, Gabe," I greeted through my bluetooth, grinning as I watched the road as I drove home from work. It was great to hear his voice. "I have a question for you."

"What's up?"

"So, I kind of need your help with something, and I need to know when you are coming back to Columbus," I told him.

"Well, we didn't make the playoffs so I can be there in a couple of weeks," he said a little bitterly. "What do you need help with?"

"Picking out an engagement ring for Santana," I said, unable to stop the goofy grin from spreading across my face.

"No shit?!" Gabe exclaimed. "That is so fucking awesome, Britt!"

"Do you think she'll say yes?" I asked a little nervously.

"Of course," he said quickly. "Brittany, she loves you like crazy. I've never seen her feel the way about anyone else before the way she feels about you. If she doesn't say yes I will smack her around until she sees the light."

I laughed, pleased that he was so confident in Santana's and my relationship. "So I have your blessing then?"

"Yes! Not that you need it, but absolutely!"

"I just want to make sure that I do, because you are San's only family and I want you to be okay with it since you mean so much to both of us."

"Brittany, you know I love you," he said sincerely. "Hell, I've already called you my sister-in-law since you guys got together. I always knew you belonged together, and I've told Tana that from the start."

"Thanks Gabe," I said quietly, my voice thick with emotion. "I love you, too."

"Well now that I know the big news, I am definitely needed there sooner! I will do my best to be there by next week to help you pick out the best engagement ring."

"I appreciate it," I said honestly. "I just want to make sure I get the opinion of somebody who has known her longer so I get the right ring."

"You know her better than anyone, so I don't think you will need my opinion too much."

"I need it to be perfect, so I really want your opinion."

"I promise I will be there to help you," Gabe vowed. "Everything will be perfect, don't worry."

"Thank you. You don't know how much this means to me."

"Anything for my future sister-in-law," he said playfully. "I will start making arrangements now and I will give you the details when I know them."

"Okay. I can't wait to see you!" I enthused.

"Me either. And don't tell Tana I'm coming, I want to surprise her."

I agreed and we said our goodbyes. My plan was definitely on track. I had narrowed down some ideas with my online searching and I knew what kind of ring I was really looking for. I just really wanted Gabe's opinion to make sure I got the right one.

Gabe was set to arrive in the middle of the next week. As promised, I didn't tell Santana that he was coming. I just told her to plan on having a quiet dinner in so she didn't suspect anything was up.

I got home at my usual time and had just finished changing when Gabe rang the doorbell. I hurried to let him in. He gave me a big hug after he set down the beer he brought with for him and Santana. I hadn't actually planned on cooking anything tonight. I really wanted to spend time visiting with him and Santana without worrying about dishes or making anything. We were just going to do pizza and beer, which I knew would be perfect for them.

Santana called me not long after Gabe got there to let me know she was on her way home. I listened to her complain about her day for a few minutes before she said she was so looking forward to a relaxing night in with me. I definitely couldn't wait to see how she reacted when she saw her brother. She said she would see me soon and we disconnected the call.

I called in our pizza order and got back to visiting with Gabe and waiting for Santana to get home. Gabe had parked down the street so he could surprise her, and when we heard the garage door open I told him to go hide in the kitchen.

"Hey babe," Santana greeted me as she walked into the house.

I walked up to meet her and pulled her in for a welcoming hug. "Hi baby," I returned. "I missed you."

"I always miss you," she replied, pulling back from the hug so she could give me a lingering kiss. "So what's for dinner?"

I grinned, knowing she was curious because she couldn't smell anything like she usually could when she got home. "Well, I have a surprise for you," I teased her, leading her toward the kitchen.

"A surprise? And what is that?" Santana asked, her voice lowering as she completely misread the type of surprise I had in store for her.

We stepped into the kitchen and Gabe grinned. "Hey big sis," he said enthusiastically.

Santana's jaw dropped and her eyes widened in shock. "Gabe?"

Her voice wavered a little as if she couldn't believe her brother was actually standing in our kitchen. Gabe took a couple of large strides toward Santana, and she rushed forward to meet him. He pulled her into a tight hug, lifting her off of the floor and swinging her feet off of the ground. Santana's arms wrapped almost frantically around his neck, and I could hear the quiet sniffles of her trying to fight off sobs.

My own eyes started to water as I watched their emotional reunion. It really sucked that they hadn't been able to see each other in so long. I only hoped that things would change and we would have more time to visit soon.

The doorbell rang and the siblings didn't even acknowledge it. I hurried to go pay for the pizza and get back to my family. When I walked back into the kitchen, Santana nearly ambushed me.

"Why didn't you tell me he was coming?"

I nearly dropped the pizza as she grabbed my arm. Gabe grabbed the boxes out of my hands and Santana wrapped me into a hug of my own. I wrapped my arms around her back tightly, returning her emotional embrace.

"We wanted to surprise you," I explained. "I know how much you've missed him."

"I love you so much," she whispered into my ear.

"I love you," I replied and pressed a kiss to her head.

The night turned less emotional and more playful as it went on. We dug into our pizza and Santana and Gabe enjoyed their beer. I splurged with a Coke and the dogs were all excited because their other mommy was super happy and giggly.

I loved watching Gabe and Santana catch up with each other. They kept hugging or smiling at one another for the first couple of hours, sharing stories they probably had already heard about what had happened while they had been separated. I got in on some of them, but mostly I just enjoyed watching them reconnect.

I went and moved Gabe's car into the driveway a little later in the night since he had been drinking. I insisted that he stay over because I didn't want him to drive. He didn't protest, and Santana was happy because it gave her more time to spend with him.

It started to get late, and I made my excuses to go to bed. I was really tired and I wanted to give them some time alone. Santana said she would be in soon, and I told her to take as long as she wanted. I knew she could get her brother set up in the guest room.

Santana woke me up some time later when she crawled into bed. Her arms wrapped around me as she pressed her front to my back. I felt her lips give me a soft kiss on my shoulder.

"Thank you for tonight," she murmured, settling her head on the pillow behind me, her nose buried in my hair.

"Anything for you," I mumbled sleepily.

Santana squeezed me lightly and I settled right back into sleep, dreaming about the future.

Gabe and I started our shopping that weekend. I told Santana that I was going to get my haircut and maybe stop by the pet store. I met Gabe at the first jewelry store I wanted to check out. It was one of the chains, but I hoped that it meant they had a better selection.

There were a few rings that stood out to me as I browsed, but nothing that I loved yet. The salesman came up to Gabe and me as we looked at the engagement rings in the case.

"Are you shopping for your fiancée sir?" The man asked Gabe.

Gabe shook his head. "No, we're looking for a ring so she can propose to my sister," he told the man, pointing at me.

"Oh," the man said, a not very well hidden look of disgust crossing his features. He tried to cover it, but we had already seen it. "Have you seen anything that you want a closer look at?"

I was not happy. I could feel my face start to flush as my anger rose. "No," I said. "I don't see anything I like."

"You're right, Britt," Gabe agreed. "I don't think we'll find anything we're looking for here. Let's go."

Gabe and I left the store. He grabbed my clenched fist in his hand and pulled my fingers loose.

"Don't let him get to you," he told me. "He's an idiot, and I didn't think Tana would like any of those rings anyways."

I took a deep breath. "You're right. I didn't see anything I wanted for her there."

Gabe nodded to me and we went to the next store. I couldn't be out too long, otherwise Santana would get suspicious. The second store didn't give us much luck either. I was disappointed, but it was only the first day we had started to look. We made plans to go out next weekend, and I went to actually get my hair cut.

After getting a trim and swinging by the pet store to get some dog food and a couple of squeaky toys for the dogs, plus a bag of cat food, I made my way home.

"What took so long?" Santana asked curiously when I came in the door.

"My hairdresser was behind," I lied, hoping she wouldn't see through it.

"Oh. Well your hair looks nice, Britt," she said with a gentle smile.

I grinned at her and told her to help me bring in the rest of the stuff from the car.

The next week was stressful. I tried doing a little more online browsing to see if I could find the right place to go to get the perfect ring. I definitely had ideas, but hadn't found any that I saw could be picked up from a local jewelry store. Who knew that trying to pick out an engagement ring would be so hard and frustrating?

Santana could sense something was up, and I told her I was stressed over work. My wonderful girlfriend then arranged for a night in for us where she made a romantic dinner followed by a relaxing bubble bath. She massaged my shoulders in the tub as I lay back against her, the scent of lavender candles burning in the bathroom helping to soothe my worries.

We helped to dry each other off, which led to a little more caressing. Santana then led me to the bed where she proceeded to make love to me slowly and thoroughly. I was absolutely head over heels crazy about her. That night just reinforced my decision to find the perfect ring for my perfect girl.

Gabe came over on Saturday to hang out. We ate lunch at the house together before Gabe and I told Santana that we needed to run some errands. She gave us a suspicious look, so I told her that we were going shopping for her birthday next month. It wasn't really a lie, and it kept her from demanding to go with us. I can honestly say though, that I would have been suspicious in her place if she was going out shopping with my sister without me. It wasn't exactly something that Gabe and I did together on the regular.

I had better hopes for this excursion. It did go well, but not as well as I had hoped. The first store didn't have much of what I was looking for. The second store had a ring that I really liked, but I didn't love. It was a princess cut solitaire diamond, a little less than a carat, set in a twisted band. It was unique, and it kind of reminded me how two lives would intertwine into one when they married. I thought Santana would like it, but I wasn't quite sold. Gabe agreed that we should keep looking around and come back if we didn't find anything we really loved.

I went home a little disappointed. Santana didn't notice however, and we all went out to dinner together.

"So how did the shopping go?" Santana asked at the restaurant. "Did you buy me anything good?"

I rolled my eyes at the pleased smirk on her face. "I'm not telling you," I chastised her. "It wouldn't be a good birthday surprise if I gave you any idea on if we got you anything or not already."

She pouted at me, but her eyes were sparkling, indicating her amusement. "But I wanna know," she whined playfully.

"Tana, don't bother," Gabe said. "We won't give anything away."

"Oh, I'm sure I could make Britt talk," she teased seductively, shooting me a lustful look.

Despite the arousal that naturally settled in my lower belly, I shook my head at her. "No you couldn't," I stated matter-of-factly.

"You guys are no fun," she pouted for real this time.

"Awww, poor baby," I cooed. "Do you want me to kiss you all better?"

Her eyes sparked in arousal and locked onto my lips. "Yes," she husked.

"Ugh, please not while I'm trying to eat," Gabe groaned. "Can you guys not be all over each other for one night?"

Santana smiled and shrugged at him. "Not really."

I chuckled. "It's kind of true. Sorry," I said with no trace of apology in my voice.

"Whatever," he grumbled. "I just don't like seeing my sisters getting it on in front of me. It scars a man."

"We weren't even doing anything, you big baby," Santana said.

"You were practically fucking each other with your eyes," Gabe argued. "I don't need to be a mind reader to know exactly what kind of images are going through your head when you guys look at each other like that."

I blushed because I had been having exactly those types of images flit through my brain when Santana had been looking at me like that. I couldn't help it. She's so sexy!

"Grow up," Santana scolded, then turned back and noticed my blush. She smirked at me before leaning in to whisper in my ear. "I know exactly what you were thinking, babe. I could see the things you want to do to me in your eyes."

My blush grew stronger as I squeezed my thighs together. Santana snickered in my ear, grazing her tongue in a feather light touch against the shell of it before she pulled back.

Gabe's fork clattered against his plate as he let out a sound of disgust. "Seriously? What did I just say?"

Santana laughed, knowing that her brother wasn't really upset with us, but sat back fully in her chair and we got back to our dinner. Without Santana's teasing, I could finally concentrate on my meal and calm down. I was so going to make her pay for that later.

Santana both loved and hated her payback. I teased her for so long that she nearly came from my foreplay. I finally gave her two orgasms before she returned the favor.

I was starting to kind of freak out by the next weekend. Santana didn't even say anything when Gabe and I went out shopping again. She just smiled at us and gave me a kiss goodbye. I needed to find the ring today, otherwise I feared I wouldn't find it by the time I wanted to propose. If that happened, then I would have to change my entire plan.

We did actually go to the mall this time so Gabe could look for some birthday presents for Santana. He decided to get her a new tablet and he got a t-shirt made that said 'Bride to Be' on it in preparation for the hopefully upcoming proposal.

I decided to check out one of the smaller, local jewelry stores this time. I hoped that they might have a different kind of selection than what the larger chains had offered so far.

I wasn't too thrilled with the selection at first. Then the saleswoman came over.

"Can I help you find anything?" The woman asked politely.

"I'm looking for an engagement ring for my girlfriend," I told her, a slight blush covering my cheeks at the pleasure of telling someone that.

The woman smiled pleasantly at me. "I think I can help you with that," she said. "My name is Cathy."

"Brittany," I introduced myself.

"Do you know what kind of style she would like?"

I nodded. "I have a pretty good idea," I said. "She is really beautiful and elegant, and she likes fairly simple jewelry but with a unique look. Like, she wouldn't want ten diamonds on a ring but she would like something to make it stand out as different."

Cathy gave me a happy look. "It sounds like you know what she likes pretty well." I nodded, smiling at her. "So you are looking for maybe a solitaire?"

"Yeah," I confirmed. "Or maybe something with a larger stone with two smaller ones beside it. But I think she would like a solitaire."

"Okay. Any idea on the cut of the diamond?"

"Princess cut." Gabe and I both spoke at the same time.

Cathy grinned. "Is he your shopping buddy?"

Gabe laughed. "I'm the girlfriend's brother, and I am only here to offer my opinion on if I think whatever ring Britt picks out will be fawned over by my sister."

Cathy nodded. "So you agree she prefers the princess cut?"

"Yep," Gabe confirmed. "Our mother's engagement ring was princess cut, and Santana always gushed over it. She said she hoped she got one like it when she got engaged."

I honestly hadn't even known that. Santana and I hadn't really talked about getting engaged before, apart from the casual talk of still being together years in the future. I just thought that the cut of the diamond was something she would like. I was glad to know that I had been right in my guess.

"Do you know how big of a stone you are wanting?"

"Probably around a carat," I said. "I don't want anything too large, otherwise I am afraid it would look gaudy."

Cathy nodded. "Okay, I think I have a pretty good idea of what you are looking for. Just sit tight here for a moment and I will be back with some rings for you to look at."

I murmured an agreement and she went to the back of the store to get out whatever selections she thought I would like.

"Was that true about your mom's ring?" I asked Gabe.

He looked at me, a little surprised. "Yeah. Did she not tell you?"

I shook my head. "No, we haven't really talked a lot about engagement stuff, so the style of ring we would like never really came up."

"Wow. I thought you knew since you were really only looking at princess cut diamonds the whole time," he said, impressed.

Cathy came back out a moment later with a tray filled with several different rings on it. I saw a nice looking ring with three stones on it. But my eyes were immediately drawn to the ring in the middle.

It was a solitaire princess cut set in a white gold band that had some type of intricate looking scrollwork down the sides. It looked kind of old fashioned, but was clearly a modern ring.

"That one," I said confidently, pointing at the ring.

Cathy smiled at me. "That's an excellent choice," she praised. "The diamond is just a little over a carat and is an excellent grade. The design of the band is considered antique, and we actually have a wedding band that matches it."

"What do you think?" I turned to Gabe.

He grinned at me. "I think she will love it. It looks perfect, Britt."

I let out a relieved breath, grinning myself. I felt all of the stress I had been feeling flow out of me. This was definitely the right ring. I knew it deep in my heart.

"That's the one," I told Cathy.

I told her Santana's size, and she said that the ring she showed me was actually that size. Then she went over the price with me. I was a little shocked at how much it was. I had never shopped for engagement rings before, not needing to since Sam had surprised me with a proposal before. And that ring was nothing like this one. But I could afford it, and I would honestly have paid more for it if it would make Santana happy.

Cathy did say that I could make payments on it if needed, but I told her that I could cover the cost. Gabe's eyes widened a little at that.

"Are you sure, Britt? I can help you out if you need it," he murmured quietly so Cathy wouldn't hear as she gathered the other rings to take to the back.

I gave him an offended look. "You are not giving any money to buy my girlfriend's engagement ring," I stated firmly. "I have the money, Gabe. You don't need to worry about that."

"It isn't exactly a thousand dollar ring though," he protested.

"Gabe, I have barely spent any money over the past few years. The exception being the trip to Ireland and things for your sister," I explained. "I make way more than I pay out in bills, and I have a large cushion in my savings, not to mention what I have in my checking. Trust me, this won't make that big of a dent in it."

"Okay," he gave in, appeased.

Cathy came back and we settled the payment. She put the ring into a ring box for me and bagged everything up.

"I hope you have a wonderful engagement. And I hope to see you back here with your future fiancée," Cathy said pleasantly as we prepared to leave.

"Thank you," I told her genuinely. I would definitely be coming back here. Not only to buy the wedding band, but to look for any other jewelry I might want to buy in the future. This place felt like it was meant for me to find.

I left the store a bundle of nervous and excited energy. I had a ring that was going to have to be well hidden until the perfect moment. I couldn't wait to give it to Santana. I hoped she was going to love it as much as I thought she would. But mostly I just hoped she was going to say yes.

 **A/N: OMG! Brittany got Santana an engagement ring! Big, big things are happening! Who thought that Brittany was going to go ring shopping already? Who thought that she would be the one proposing? What do you guys think Santana is going to say? Do you think she has any idea what Britt has been up to?**

 **So I apologize for not really giving you anything from their trip. I haven't been to Ireland (yet), so I didn't want to try describing a bunch of stuff and getting it completely wrong or anything. But I hope I made it worth it with everything else!**

 **I think their relationship is really cute, and we got to see more of their playful side together. They both seem really happy with each other, which makes Santana more relaxed and easy-going than she normally would be and Brittany more confident and outgoing. They help to balance each other a lot. And Brittany definitely has a good friendship going with Gabe, which she really needed in her life.**

 **What did you guys think? How do you think the proposal is going to go, if it happens? And 150 reviews? I am amazed! Thank you all so much!**

 **One final thing- I need your help! I read a Brittana fic awhile back and I am trying to find it again but am having absolutely no luck. I am hoping you guys can help me out with the title or the author possibly. It is an AU where Santana and Quinn live together in an apartment (I am pretty sure in NYC) and are in college, and Brittany ends up moving in with Rachel across the street. Santana and Britt can actually see into each other's rooms, and Santana isn't out (really to herself or even anyone). But when she meets Britt things kind of change. She and Brittany bond over watching One Tree Hill together, and they fall for each other. Santana sings her feelings to Brittany at a cafe or bar or something, and asks Brittany to meet her after the song if she feels the same. She thinks Brittany left and is devastated, but finds Brittany waiting for her in the back and then their relationship starts. At the end of the fic, Rachel and Quinn end up moving in together so Brittany and Santana can live together. I am pretty positive that is all the same story and I didn't mix anything up. Anybody have any idea what story this is? Thanks for any help!**


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

"Happy birthday baby," I murmured quietly to Santana, pressing a feather-light kiss to her cheek as she slept. It was about 8 o'clock in the morning, but, even though I wanted to let Santana sleep in on her birthday, we had a busy day ahead of us and needed to get moving.

She hummed softly and a small smile crossed her lips as her eyes fluttered open. They settled on me with a loving look. "Good morning, Britt," she said. "You up already?"

I smiled at her and nodded. I was sitting on her side of the bed to wake her up. "I brought you breakfast in bed," I informed her, indicating the tray I had set on her nightstand.

She turned her head to see the tray filled with waffles and syrup, strawberries, coffee, and orange juice. "Thank you, babe," she said sincerely before grabbing my arm and pulling me down on top of her. "It looks delicious, but I think I want you for breakfast in bed."

She pulled me in for a heated kiss, which I happily returned. I moaned as I felt Santana's tongue stroke deeply in my mouth. Arousal sparked between my thighs and I absolutely wanted to make love with her, but we had a schedule to keep. I reluctantly broke the kiss and pulled back to look at her lust-filled brown eyes.

"I would love to let you devour me, but we actually have places to be today and that would put us way off of our plan," I said regretfully.

She pouted at me, which tugged at my heart and made me frown back. "But I want you," she whined huskily.

"And I want you," I said honestly. "I promise we can make love for as long as you want later."

Santana didn't look too pleased yet. "You promise?"

"Yes, baby. It's your birthday, so you can do whatever you want however long you want. As long as it is after our plans."

Santana's eyes sparked with delight. "Anything I want huh?" I nodded in confirmation, a smirk crossing my lips as I delighted in thoughts of whatever she may have in store for me later. She grinned. "Okay, then I guess I can eat the breakfast you made."

I helped her to sit up and put the tray onto her lap after she was settled. Santana dug in, and I stole bites of her food here and there. I figured she wouldn't drink much of the orange juice since I had brought her coffee, so I drank most of that. She complimented me on the food and thanked me again with a kiss.

"You spoil me Britt," she said as I took the tray off of her lap after she was finished.

"I love you, so of course I do," I stated. "Now, go get in the shower and get dressed. We've got places to go."

She gave me a suspicious look but went to do as I said. I took the tray into the kitchen and cleaned up the dishes. I headed back to our bedroom once I was finished to find Santana in a towel, her damp hair dripping down her shoulders. I couldn't resist walking up to her and placing an open-mouthed kiss on her bare shoulder, sucking her skin between my lips.

Santana turned around and wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me into a sweet kiss.

"I love you," she said softly against my lips.

"I love you, too," I replied.

"What should I wear for whatever you have planned?"

"Something comfortable," I told her.

"Ugh, that doesn't help much," she complained.

I grinned mischievously at her and gave her a playful smack on her ass before heading to the bathroom to shower.

Once we were both ready to go, I grabbed my purse and a tote bag filled with several things necessary for our outing. I was nervous but excited.

"So where are we going?" Santana asked as I started to drive.

I shook my head at her, shooting her a look that meant she wasn't going to get anything out of me. "I can't tell you," I said. "You are just going to have to wait and see."

"But Britt," she whined, "it's my birthday."

"Yep, it is. And it is a common thing on birthdays to be surprised. So just wait and see."

She tried pouting and cajoling it out of me, but I wouldn't budge. I finally pulled into a parking area in downtown Columbus, and, by the look of confusion on Santana's face, she had no clue what was going on. That was good.

I put my purse and the tote bag over my shoulder and took her by the hand and started walking. Santana remained quiet as we went, trying to figure out where we were going. It wasn't until we got within sight of our destination that she figured it out, but she was still confused as to why we were going there.

"Britt, why are we here?" Santana asked once I stopped.

I smiled at her, squeezing her hand as we stood in front of the bar where we first met. It wasn't even 11am yet, so the bar wasn't open. I could understand why she was questioning our destination since we couldn't even go in. But little did she know that this wasn't our true destination.

"San, this was where we first met," I started to explain. "The first time I saw you, I was thunderstruck. I had never had the reaction before to anyone the way I reacted to you when I laid eyes on you. I wanted to know you more than anything. I think I started to fall in love with you the moment our eyes met. The decision to come to this bar that day, something I never would have normally done, changed my life. It started the beginning of our journey, so it is only fitting that it is the beginning of our adventure today."

Santana's eyes had gazed on me with love as I spoke of our first meeting. She gave me a sweet smile. "So what exactly are we doing?"

I could hear the excitement in her voice at the thought of a birthday adventure. I grinned playfully. "Think of it is a sort of scavenger hunt for your presents," I said, and her eyes lit up in pleasure. "Here is your first clue."

I pulled out the envelope marked with the number '1' on it out of the tote bag and handed it to her. Santana pulled it open, and despite me knowing what it already said, read it aloud.

"You need to go to the place where you bought me a drink for the first time and we got to know each other around the ice," she read. I saw the smile as she figured it out quickly, looking up at me with confidence. "The hockey arena."

I made the first one pretty easy, but I nodded in confirmation. I reached into the tote and pulled out a plastic grocery bag and a small gift-wrapped box. I handed both to Santana.

"Here is your first present, but you aren't allowed to open it until I say," I told her sternly. "You can store it in the bag for now, and make sure you don't lose it."

She gave me a look as she tried to figure out why I wouldn't let her open the present now, but just nodded and put the small box into the bag. I grabbed her hand again and we started walking in the direction of the arena. The walk wasn't too long, but it wasn't just around the block. I was glad Santana decided to listen to me and wear comfortable shoes and not heels, because we were going to be doing quite a bit of walking.

We reached the arena, but did not go inside. There was no need to, and Santana understood that. She turned to me expectantly, and I giggled as I pulled out the second envelope and handed it to her.

"Go to the place where we said 'I love you' for the first time," she read with a tender smile. "My old apartment."

She looked up at me for confirmation, but she already knew she would receive it. I could see the love in her eyes, and I looked at her tenderly.

"You're right, of course," I said softly. "And I still love you. So much."

"I love you," she replied, standing up on her toes to put her lips on mine for a soft peck.

I tucked her hair behind her ear after she pulled away and cupped her cheek lovingly as I looked into her eyes for a moment. My nervousness from the day was starting to fade with every loving look and correct guess from Santana. She remembered every little moment of our relationship just as I did. She clearly loved me so much.

I cleared my throat a little and pulled out the next little wrapped box, which Santana put into her bag. I wondered if she was suspicious as to why the boxes were the same exact size. But she didn't say anything. She just interlaced her fingers with mine and started the short walk toward the place where she used to live (and where Gabe was currently residing).

Santana looked as if she was going to actually walk in the building once we arrived, but I stopped her.

"We don't actually need to go into the apartment," I informed her. In fact, it was probably best that we didn't, because I didn't want Gabe to give anything away if he saw us.

"Okay," she said easily, stopping outside of her old building. "Gimme."

Santana held her hand out, waggling her fingers impatiently for the next envelope. I rolled my eyes but still smiled at her as I pulled out the envelope with the number '3' on it. Santana ripped it open eagerly, pulling out the piece of paper inside.

"Go to the place you took me for our one month anniversary where I called you 'baby' for the first time," Santana read. This one was a little tougher and I was a little worried she wouldn't remember, but Santana smiled happily as she looked at me. "The Latin restaurant where you bitched my ex out."

I laughed and nodded. "Yeah, but I would prefer not to think about that and have you think about the good part of the night," I told her.

She grinned at me. "That was a good part of the night," she said. "It was hot how you put that bitch in her place."

I smirked at her. "Well, keep that in mind for later," I said teasingly, handing her the next little wrapped box.

I could see her brows scrunch a little bit as she took it and put it in the bag with the others and the clues, the gears in her head turning as she was trying to figure out what could be in all of the tiny boxes. I bit back a laugh and looped my arm through hers as I led the way toward the restaurant.

We chatted a bit along the way, as it was a longer walk this time. The streets were a little crowded, but we navigated our way through the city. It was lunchtime now, so I led Santana into the restaurant so we could relax and eat. She was a little surprised at this, since we hadn't gone into any of the other stops so far. But this was part of the plan. I wanted to give her a nice birthday lunch, and this place was good and it was one of our stops, so why not eat there? Plus, I needed to take my pill so it was a good time to stop.

Santana enjoyed the food, but I could tell she was ready to get back to our scavenger hunt. She knew that this wasn't our final stop, so after I paid for the lunch I handed her the fourth envelope. She tore it open with glee and pulled out the clue.

"Go to the place where you bought me my favorite dessert for the first time," she read aloud. Her brow furrowed a little as she thought. I was afraid she might not get this one, but her face cleared as she looked up at me. "First date, right?"

I nodded, the start of a smile making its way to my lips.

"Jeni's Ice Cream at Easton," Santana answered confidently.

I grinned, loving the fact that she remembered so much about our entire relationship. Hell, she remembered practically everything ever since we first met. "That would be it," I confirmed, handing her the fourth small box.

I could tell she wanted to ask about the gifts, but she held her tongue. She knew she wouldn't find out what was in them until I allowed her to open them. She put the box and the clue into her bag, which she then stuffed into her purse since she knew we had a bit of a walk back to the car now.

We walked and talked. I asked her if she was enjoying her birthday so far. She assured me that she was having fun and couldn't wait to open her presents. I was feeling a bit tired once we reached the car. We had done a lot of walking, and it was starting to get to me a little bit. Santana could tell, so she offered to drive and I eagerly took her up on it. Resting would do me good, and I ended up dozing a little bit before we reached the mall.

Santana shook my shoulder gently after she had parked.

"You okay, sweetie?"

I yawned and nodded. "Yeah, just a little tired," I assured her. "I am feeling better though."

She could see that I was telling the truth, so she went ahead and grabbed her purse and the bag of presents and got out of the car. I followed with my own purse and tote bag. We walked over to the ice cream shop and I led Santana inside.

"You okay to share a birthday cone?" I asked her.

She grinned and agreed, and we ordered a chocolate cone that we took turns eating as we sat outside and let me rest a bit more. I truly loved this woman. She knew that I still needed to rest a bit after all of that walking, so she automatically led me to a place to sit so we could enjoy our ice cream and relax.

Santana gave me the last bite of the ice cream cone and, after wiping off my face and hands of some of the melted dessert, I gave Santana the fifth envelope. She took it with a smile and opened it.

"Go to the place where I made a fool of myself the second time I took you on a date." She giggled after she read the clue, knowing immediately what I was referring to. She gave me an amused look. "The mini-golf place."

I blushed and nodded. It was our fourth date, but the second one I had taken Santana on. I took her to a nearby miniature golf course before going out to dinner. I thought it would be something fun to do and I could easily putt a ball into a hole. I liked mini golf. At least I had until that day.

Santana was pretty competitive, which I had found adorable. I was pretty distracted by her all night though, which was hurting my score and Santana knew exactly the cause of my poor performance. So, at one point in the night, she had stood close behind me as I was getting ready to hit the ball and traced her fingertip lightly down the back of my neck. The feeling sent shudders shooting through me and caused me to jerk my arms harder than I intended, which resulted in me hitting the ball hard. It flew up into the air and hit a guy in the head on the hole next to us.

I ended up stuttering out an embarrassed apology to the man, my skin flushed from the top of my head down to my chest. Santana just giggled at me as I made a fool of myself, trying to apologize as the guy just looked at me like I was crazy. Finally he ended my misery by saying it wasn't a big deal and walked away, rubbing the little bump on his head. I was mortified the rest of the night, and Santana found it adorable apparently. Eventually her kisses soothed me.

"I thought you swore you would never go back there," Santana reminded me.

I shrugged a little, not concerned. "I would do anything for you," I stated truthfully.

She grinned at me and I handed her the next box. She put it and the clue away and we headed back to the car. Santana continued to drive, giving me more time to rest. She drove back to Westerville and went straight to the mini-golf place. I got out of the car and took her hand, leading her up to the building to pay.

"We're going to play?" Santana asked in surprised delight.

I smiled and paid the attendant. We grabbed clubs and I picked a light blue ball and Santana picked a purple one.

"No dirty tricks today," I told her firmly.

She giggled and I knew she wouldn't listen to me. I just had to do my best to ignore her. It wasn't easy, but I managed to not hit the ball out of the green on any of the holes. My score was atrocious, but I learned a few holes in that I could just as easily distract Santana. I found that if I would whisper dirty things to her she would lose her focus and hit the ball errantly.

As we progressed we got more daring in our teasing of each other until I realized we were getting a few dirty looks, especially after Santana grabbed my ass as I was getting ready to hit the ball. Santana realized it as well, so we finished up our game quickly and stopped our distraction techniques. Santana still won, but she didn't beat me by much.

We returned our clubs at the end and I gave Santana the sixth envelope.

"Go to the place where we had our first picnic," she read. She smiled softly. "Sharon Woods."

Her eyes met mine and she looked at me so tenderly. My heart swelled. We were nearing the end of our adventure, and I had a good feeling about it.

"That would be correct," I said. I gave her the next present, and she didn't even look at it before she put it in the bag. It was the same as all of the others.

We got back into the car and Santana drove the short distance to the park. She parked the car near the same spot where we had our picnic, and we went ahead and got out of the car and headed down to the waterside.

I turned toward her and cupped her face between my hands. Our eyes locked and I could feel the love flowing between us. Her gaze flicked down to my lips and I unconsciously licked them. Santana bit her lower lip and her eyes came back up to meet mine. They fluttered closed as soon as I leaned in and kissed her.

I kissed her slowly, letting my lips caress hers and take her lower lip between mine before releasing it to go after her upper lip. Santana kissed me back gently, her arms wrapping around my waist to hold me close to her.

I pressed a final, lingering peck to her lips before I pulled back. My thumbs caressed her cheeks before I dropped my hands from her face. Santana didn't release her hold on me until I handed her the next and final envelope.

She took it and opened it slowly, pulling out the clue to read it out loud.

"Go to the place where we had our first kiss, where we made love for the first time, and where we started our future together," she read quietly. She looked up at me, the tears in her eyes making them glitter before she blinked them away. "That would be home."

My own tears were threatening to choke me up, so I just nodded as I fought them away. I handed her the last box, which she immediately put into the bag. She interlaced her fingers with mine and walked so closely with me back to the car that she was practically leaning into me. She drove the whole way home with our fingers intertwined.

We entered the house and I told Santana to go ahead and sit on the couch while I let the dogs out. She did so and pulled out her presents and put them onto the coffee table. She sat there pondering them as I watched her with a nervous excitement.

After the dogs did their business and came back in, I went to the couch and sat next to her. I made sure to have the tote with me, and I reached in and pulled out one more envelope. This one was clearly a card, and I gave it to Santana to open.

"You can open your presents after you read your card," I said, trying to keep the nervousness out of my voice.

"Okay," she replied, her curiosity starting to get to her. The card wasn't anything too special. Just a generic birthday card wishing her the best on her special day and giving her my love. But there was one thing I wrote on there that was different. It was just a simple note that said 'I hope you like your present.'

"I'm sure I will," Santana said to me after she read her card. "And I love you too."

I smiled at her. "Go ahead and open your boxes," I told her.

She eagerly ripped the paper off of the first small box. She removed the lid and I almost laughed aloud at her confused look. She tipped the box over to put the item inside into her hand.

"What?" Santana asked, unsure of what the purpose was of the object she was now holding.

"Open the rest," I said.

She shot me a look that meant she really had no clue what the hell I was doing. She put the tiny block with the letter 'A' on it onto the coffee table and opened the next box. It held a similar item, only the block at the letter 'Y' on it. She continued to open each box one by one until she had seven blocks with letters on them spread on the coffee table. She still didn't understand what was going on, as evidenced by the scrunched brows she was gracing me with.

"What am I supposed to do Britt?"

"It's like a jumble," I explained. "You need to figure out the right arrangement of the letters to figure out what it is supposed to say."

A light came into her eyes as she understood what I was doing here. She turned her concentration back to the blocks and she started to move them around as she tried to figure out what they were supposed to spell out. She moved blocks around for a bit, but she still hadn't figured it out. I had confidence in her though. She was extremely intelligent, and she liked to figure things out. I knew she could do it.

I could tell she was starting to get on the right track when she asked me a question. "Is it two words?"

"Yes," I confirmed.

She looked back at the blocks, her face screwed up in concentration. She moved the blocks around a bit more. She finally figured out the second word, and I knew it wouldn't take her long from there. I put my hand into the tote bag and wrapped my fingers around the final present. Santana's eyes started to go wide as she arranged the letters correctly.

"Brittany," she breathed as she looked down at the two words she had made on the coffee table.

The words that I knew said 'marry me.' I pulled the ring box out of the bag and kneeled down on the floor at Santana's feet. Her eyes locked onto me before they saw the box in my hands. Her own hands came up to cover her mouth as she sucked in a breath, tears starting to pool in her eyes.

"Santana," I said shakily. My nerves were really at their peak right now, but I couldn't let that stop me. I wouldn't. "From the moment we met I knew you were special. You bought me cupcakes for my birthday so I wouldn't have to celebrate it alone. From that day on, I wanted you in my life. I wanted you as more than a friend, but I would have been happy if it was only friendship you offered."

Santana's tears were starting to roll down her cheeks. I realized that my own cheeks were wet with tears.

"Thankfully, you had the same feelings for me that I had for you, only you had the guts to say something," I continued, and Santana gave a little laugh. "And everything from there was just magical. I fell so hard for you. I thought I had known love before, but I found that I didn't know true love until I found you. I love you so much. You are my soulmate, and I want to spend the rest of our lives together. I feel like we could do anything as long as we are by each other's sides."

Santana's tears were coming harder now as she cried quietly, her hands still covering her mouth and nose. I could feel my own emotion starting to settle in my throat, but I had to get the rest of the words out. They were the most important.

"I hope you feel the same way. So," I paused, opening up the box to reveal the glittering engagement ring. "Santana, will you marry me?"

Santana's face scrunched up as her emotion took over and her tears fell faster. She started nodding her head slowly at me, removing her shaking hands from her face.

"Yes," she choked out through her tears. "Yes!"

My face broke out into a grin as my own tears were falling faster. "Yes?" I felt like I was in a dream. I needed confirmation to know this was real.

She nodded harder, her mouth turning up into a smile. "Yes. I would love nothing more than to marry you, Brittany," she confirmed.

"Oh my God," I exclaimed. "I love you so much!"

"I love you, too," she replied.

I moved up and cupped her face as I kissed her hard. I kept murmuring my love for her between kisses and she replied with the same sentiments.

I finally pulled back when I realized I hadn't put the ring on. I took the ring out of the box, my shaky hands finally getting a grip on it. I laughed happily, my cheeks still wet, as I slid the ring onto her finger. It was a perfect fit, and it looked so beautiful on her hand.

"It's so beautiful," Santana said, admiring it. "It is exactly what I always wanted."

I made a mental note to go back to the jewelry store soon and give Cathy a massive hug. "I'm glad you like it," I said, wiping away Santana's tears before giving her another kiss. "When I saw it I just knew it was yours."

"I don't even know how you knew that," she said in amazement. "It is truly perfect. And so are you."

I shook my head a little. She was the perfect one. But she stopped my protest with another kiss.

"We're engaged," I whispered in my own amazement when we pulled back. It was all hitting me now.

Santana smiled happily at me. "We're engaged," she confirmed. "I love you."

"I love you," I said, gazing into her eyes. She wiped away the remnants of my tears with her thumbs, and I cleared my throat as I tried to settle my emotions. "Okay, we need to go out to dinner to celebrate."

Santana looked surprised. "Seriously?" I nodded. "I figured we would kind of stay here and celebrate."

"No way," I protested. "We just got engaged and it is your birthday! We need to go out and have a huge celebration! You can get champagne and a delicious meal and dessert and we can flash your ring to everyone we see."

Santana laughed at my enthusiasm. "But I want to celebrate a different way," she said, her voice low and her eyes darkening with desire.

I returned her hooded gaze. "I promise we will do that later," I said. "I already promised you this morning that we would. But I kind of made reservations for dinner."

Realization dawned on her at my explanation. I had already planned this all out and hoped that her birthday dinner would turn into an engagement dinner. She agreed without any further protest. I told her we needed to get ready and we needed to put on dresses.

Santana headed back to the bedroom after giving me one more long, lingering kiss and another exchange of 'I love yous.' I sent out a quick text before joining her. It was hard to get ready when we wanted to be all over each other. Random kisses turned into make-out sessions which were cut short, only to start again. I had to put my foot down in order for us to finish getting ready.

We were finally finished getting ready. I was wearing a red dress tonight and Santana was in purple. She looked so beautiful, and my heart was full at the knowledge that she was wearing my ring on her finger. We were going to get married!

I drove us to the restaurant that I had booked. I led her inside and gave the host my name. Santana looked a little confused when he led us by the main part of the restaurant toward a private room. I smiled and thanked the host as he walked away and I opened the door and let Santana into the room.

"Surprise!"

Santana jumped a little as everyone yelled out. I grinned and wrapped my arms around her waist from behind.

"Surprise," I whispered into her ear. "Happy birthday."

She turned her head and grinned at me, pressing a quick peck to my lips before turning back to the crowd of people in the room. My parents were there, as was Gabe. Gus and Sandy were in the crowd, as well as Kyle and his boyfriend Charlie. Santana's other friends were there, and my sister and nephew had even come into town at my request.

Santana saw the banner that was hung on the wall. It said 'Happy Birthday and Congratulations' on it. "Is this a party to celebrate our engagement too?"

"Yep," I said with a grin.

She was in awe of all that had happened today and amazed at all of the people who had turned out to celebrate her birthday and our engagement. Santana greeted the guests as they came up to her and gave her birthday wishes and they congratulated us both on the engagement. My mom hugged us both enthusiastically and my dad had tears in his eyes as he gave us his congratulations.

Everyone else was incredibly happy for us, especially Gabe. He and Santana shared a long hug and they had a quiet conversation during their embrace. They both had tears in their eyes when they finally pulled apart. Gabe then gave me a crushing hug and a hearty congratulations, telling me that he knew all along she would say yes and that we were going to be incredibly happy together.

The night was amazing. The whole day had been amazing. We had a great dinner with family and friends who cared about us. We ate cake (made by Kyle of course) and went home and made love for hours. My life could not get any better. I had a beautiful fiancée and we were incredibly in love. The future looked bright.

 **A/N: With Christmas around the corner and things getting hectic, I won't be posting again this week. I apologize for that, but I figured I would leave you for the week on a really happy chapter. So this chapter is my present to you all! I hope you guys liked it. This is probably my favorite chapter of the whole story, so I really hope it is a good one for you too!**

 **What did you think of Brittany's birthday adventure for Santana and the proposal? Did anybody think that Santana had any clue what was going on? Of course she was going to say yes (as if there was any doubt)! But what do you think she was thinking when she realized what the blocks said and that Brittany was proposing? I can't wait to hear your thoughts on this chapter!**

 **And I just wanted to say a giant THANK YOU to every single person who took the time to let me know what the story was that I was looking for! I already re-read it, and it was as good as the first time I did! You all are amazing for helping me out, and I would kiss every one of you if I could! No, actually, I really wouldn't because that would be really weird and awkward. And also probably spread a lot of germs around, which is just not something anybody wants... But anyways, thank you all again! You are awesome!**

 **A final note here to wish everyone who is celebrating a very Merry Christmas! However you may celebrate the holidays this time of year, I hope you have a wonderful time and get to spend it how you wish! I will be back Monday with the next chapter :)**


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

Santana and I were eager to start our wedding planning. We decided to set the date for the end of April. That time of year was really special for us. It was around the time that we had started dating and it was around the time that we went to Ireland and I realized I wanted to propose. A spring wedding sounded perfect.

It left us with only ten months to plan, so we wanted to get started pretty quickly. Both of us were really excited about getting married. Neither of us wanted a huge wedding, particularly since we didn't have a lot of friends or family to invite anyways. We wanted to have a fairly small, intimate ceremony somewhere we could have the reception at as well. So our first order of business was to find a venue.

Although Santana wanted to first buy me an engagement ring of my own. I told her she didn't need to do it right away, but she was insistent. I told her about the jewelry store I went to, and she started her shopping. She wouldn't let me go pick one out. She wanted to pick one out for me like I had done for her.

That was our first argument in regards to the wedding. I worried about Santana spending too much money on the ring. I knew how much the ring I had bought her cost, and I did not want her spending that kind of money on me. She still argued with me about not letting her contribute more to the house bills, and I knew she spent more on me by taking me out to dinner and things like that to try to make up for it. I just didn't want her to risk straining her finances since I was sure she was still paying off her student loans.

The problem was that Santana always told me she could afford more than what I allowed her to pay but she got uncomfortable when she talked about money. She would give in when I insisted that she let me take care of her, but she still wasn't happy about it. And when I told her not to spend too much money on my ring, she told me that she would spend however much she felt that she needed to for the perfect ring.

Her words touched me, but I protested, which led to our argument. In the end, I knew I wouldn't win, so I just let it go. I didn't know what else to do.

Santana took me out for a fancy dinner and to the theater to watch a touring dance show a few weeks later. When we got home, she presented me with a red and white rose each and a ring box.

"Brittany," she began, holding the box in her hand, "I know that we are already engaged, but I just feel like this moment deserves some words. I never thought I would find the one person in my life that completed me. The day we met, it just felt like something clicked into place with you. You are my other half, and I love you more than I ever realized that I could love someone. So will you accept this ring as my promise to be your wife throughout this life and beyond?"

I nodded enthusiastically, tears streaming down my face. "Of course I will," I said, pulling her into me tightly. It felt like we were getting engaged all over again.

Santana slipped the ring onto my finger tearfully, and I finally took notice of it. It was truly perfect. She had gotten me a round solitaire, a little smaller than hers. The band had a similar looking design to hers, so they were close enough to kind of match but different enough to be special for each of us. Mine was exactly what I would have wanted for myself. I just knew that she had gone to the same jewelry store. I pushed thoughts of how much it would have cost out of my head and concentrated on how happy we were in this moment.

I had to admit that I loved wearing my ring. It felt like I was wearing a big flashing sign that said 'Santana's fiancée' and I really wanted everyone to know it. People at work took notice, and to their surprise, I happily explained that I was marrying a beautiful woman. None of them had even known I had been dating anyone, much less a woman. Besides Gus, of course, who was happy to see me so happy. He gave me praise over the ring, and we made plans to get together for dinner soon with our respective partners.

Wedding planning went smooth for awhile. We found the perfect venue for the ceremony and reception. It allowed us the opportunity to get married in a beautiful setting, out in a garden if we wanted to, and there was plenty of room for the reception. The only thing was that they couldn't provide food, so we would have to find caterers. That was okay with us, since our guest list would be pretty small.

Gabe went back to Nashville at the end of the summer to start workouts for the team. Santana and I made a trip there in September to check it out and see where he lived. It was nice, and it was great to see Gabe in his new environment. He took us out to his favorite restaurants and clubs, which started to tire me out after awhile. I was getting older and ready to settle down. Partying all night wasn't my thing anymore, and I was glad to find out that Santana was feeling the same. She told me she would much rather be curled up in bed with me at home than drinking and dancing in a club every night.

Once the fall came around, we started to get even more serious about wedding details. I had a small wedding before to Sam, and it was really cheap actually since we were so young and neither of us wanted anything over the top. My parents paid for most of it, and we didn't do a whole lot of extensive planning.

But things were different now. I wanted this wedding to be different. I wanted this marriage to be different. I wanted to have a dream wedding to Santana, and I wanted Santana to have her dream wedding. I was finding out that it was actually really hard to plan a dream wedding, and it was freaking expensive. The venue was a nice chunk of money, and then we had to add caterers on top of it. Then we started looking at dresses and wedding bands and flowers and the numbers racing around my head started to stress me out a bit.

"Baby, can we maybe look at some different flowers," I said in December. "It's just that the roses are so expensive."

"Britt, the roses are kind of our thing," Santana protested. "I really want them at the wedding. But I guess we can maybe not have so many arrangements."

I sighed. "I was just hoping we could find a way to cut some of the costs down," I said frustrated. "I don't know how I am going to be able to afford all of this."

Santana shot me a look. "What do you mean how _you_ will be able to afford all of it? Am I not contributing money to our wedding?"

I could sense another argument coming on. "Tana, I didn't say you wouldn't contribute anything," I said patiently. "But I don't want you spending too much money. I know you have student loans and stuff, and even though you make good money, I don't want you to put yourself into debt because of our wedding."

Santana gave me a frustrated yet guilty look. "Brittany, if I couldn't afford it I wouldn't suggest it," she argued, her voice rising a little. "I am not stupid about money. And I really don't want you to put yourself in debt because you are trying to cover every cost of our wedding. I mean, you realize we have a honeymoon to pay for, too, right?"

I nodded. Santana was planning our honeymoon since I had come up with the Ireland trip. She wouldn't tell me where she was planning on us going, but I knew we had to pay for it as well, which was more added stress since I didn't know how much it was going to cost.

"I know we do, which is why I am looking for ways to cut some costs."

Santana's mouth tightened and she looked away from me. "Brittany," she said, her voice soft. "This wedding is supposed to be the happiest day of our lives. I want it to be perfect for us, which means I don't want to argue about how much it will cost."

I felt myself softening toward her. I wanted the wedding to be perfect too, but I wasn't sure how I could afford to give Santana everything I wanted to. "I don't want to argue either."

Santana turned to face me again, her eyes pleading. "Then please just let me help pay for at least half of the wedding and honeymoon."

My eyes widened in surprise. How could she even afford to pay for half, much less more than half? "San, I don't see how you can do that without going extremely in debt."

Santana gave a frustrated shake of her head, looking at the ceiling as if it held answers for her. "Just please let me?"

"Baby, we can find a way to make it work so that you don't have to pay that much," I told her instead.

Santana looked at me, disappointed, before she got up from the couch. She threw the wedding magazines onto the coffee table and walked out. My heart sunk as I heard her open the garage door and start her car. I wasn't sure where she was going, but I hoped she would be back soon so I could apologize for upsetting her. I knew she needed some space though, so I let her go.

I needed to talk to someone about what was going on though. So I called the only person I knew who could help me figure out Santana when I couldn't.

"Gabe, I need your help," I pleaded when he answered his phone.

"What's up Britt? Is everything okay?" Gabe asked, his voice worried.

"I don't think so," I said miserably. "Santana and I just got into an argument about the wedding and she drove off."

I was nearing tears now. I was afraid I had just ruined everything. I was torn between making Santana happy and taking care of her how I thought I needed to.

"What happened?" Gabe asked, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"We were working on wedding planning, and I was suggesting making some changes so it would be cheaper because I don't know if I can afford paying for the whole wedding if it starts getting too expensive," I explained. "Then she got mad and said that she could help pay, but I told her I didn't want her to put herself into debt since I'm sure she is still paying off student loan debt."

"Student loan… Brittany, what are you talking about?"

Gabe's confusion was evident. "I mean, I know she's been out of school for a couple of years and she is making good money, but I just don't see how she could be making enough to pay off her debts and be able to afford the wedding expenses," I said, wondering if I was way off base.

"Oh my God, I'm going to kill her," Gabe mumbled.

"Huh?"

"Britt, you need to talk to Santana," he told me. "You need to get her to explain to you exactly why she can afford to help pay for the wedding."

"Well, every time we've talked about money before she has just kind of clammed up and given in after I put my foot down about her paying," I said. "How can she afford it, Gabe?"

"I can't tell you that. It's Santana's place to tell you. I'm sorry."

"Gabe, what is going on?" I was really confused now.

"Just force her to talk to you. Don't let her avoid it," he said.

I agreed and hung up the phone. What the hell was going on? What didn't I know?

About an hour later, Santana came back home looking apologetic. I stood up from the couch and walked behind it to meet her as she walked in. I stopped about five feet away from her, unsure if she would want me to get closer.

"Where did you go?" I asked her with worry.

"I just went to the park to walk around for a bit and clear my head," she told me. "Look, I'm really sorry for how I acted. I was just frustrated that you seem to be shutting me out of helping to contribute financially to our relationship. We have to be equal partners Brittany. I don't want you to pay for everything, just as I wouldn't expect you to let me pay for everything."

I nodded in understanding. "I get that," I said. "And I'm sorry for making you feel that I don't want you to help pay for things, I just am worried about you stretching yourself too thin. I mean, I know my finances and what I can afford for us, but anytime I've brought up your money you kind of clam up. Please, just tell me why I shouldn't worry?"

Santana held her right arm with her left hand, averting her gaze to the couch. My heart pounded in fear. I truly had no idea what to expect.

"Brittany, I have a lot of money," Santana said quietly. She still wouldn't meet my gaze, so she missed the look of surprise that crossed my face.

"What exactly are you saying?" I asked, confused.

"My parents were rich," she explained. "Like, really rich. My dad was some big-shot CEO and my mom was a successful stock broker. And when they died, they left Gabe and me very large trust funds, not to mention several million each that we had direct access to once we turned eighteen."

I stood frozen in shock. I definitely hadn't been expecting that. "So you don't have any student loans or other debt you're paying off?" I asked stupidly.

She shook her head, looking up at me through her lashes. "No," she said quietly. "Everything I have owned has been paid for free and clear. From my car to my apartment to your ring. I could pay for the entire wedding we want plus a month long honeymoon and not bat an eye."

I shook my head as the information started to sink in. It was crazy to think that Santana had never said anything. I mean, it made sense looking back on it. Santana never was worried about spending money when she took me out anywhere, or when she bought me expensive gifts. The only time we talked about money was when I wouldn't let her pay for things, and even then she didn't tell me why she could afford to pay.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked, hurt.

Santana's head shot up to look at me. I could see the guilt in her eyes as I fought off tears that she would hide something from me. "I'm sorry, Britt," she apologized. "I just… in the past…"

She trailed off, looking hurt and confused and so lost, and then it hit me. It all made sense.

"Courtney. It was Courtney, wasn't it?"

Her eyes closed in hurt and she nodded. She looked back at me as she tried to explain. "I took her out to a really nice restaurant on our first official date," she said. "We had kind of been casually hooking up before that, but then I started to think we could be something serious. So when I asked her out and she said yes, I wanted to make it special. She protested at how much money everything was, especially since I was still in school, and I guess I wanted to impress her. So I told her about my trust fund. After that, she was all over me. She started to say that she loved me and wanted to be around me all of the time. I took her out a lot and showered her with gifts because I thought I was really in love with her."

My heart broke for her as she told me her story. "I'm sorry, San."

She shook her head at me, whether to dismiss my words or in disgust at her previous situation, I wasn't sure. "I should have known what she was up to since she hadn't been that into me until she found out I had money," she said with scorn. "But I thought I loved her and I wanted to make her happy, so I didn't even think about it. When I found out she had been cheating on me the whole time we were together, I realized how stupid I had been. She never loved me. She was only after my money. And so I was wary about letting anyone else know my financial situation."

She gave me another guilty look, and I knew that she deliberately had kept me from knowing. It hurt more than I thought it would. "You didn't trust me," I stated.

She shook her head frantically. "No, it wasn't that," she tried to explain. Tears were falling down my cheeks now as the pain of her lie shot through me. "I trust you, and I did trust you. I was just scared. Courtney had hurt me so badly, and I couldn't go through that again."

"I get that she hurt you and you were scared," I said through my tears. I felt even worse seeing Santana crying in front of me. It was hard not to go to her. "But even if you weren't sure when we first met, you had to have known pretty early on that I would _never_ be like her. The fact that you still never told me after all of this time makes me think that you still didn't trust me. I don't care that you have money, Santana. I care that you didn't tell me when you had so many opportunities to do so. I trusted you with everything. Every part of me. And you didn't do the same."

I started to sob quietly, and Santana took a step toward me. I stepped back away from her though, not wanting her to comfort me. I would forgive her too easily then, and I couldn't do that right now. I hurt too badly.

"I'm so sorry," she cried. "I love you Brittany. And I do trust you. I tried so many times to tell you, but then more time went by and I got scared that you would be mad that I hadn't told you and I could never get the words out. I knew for sure that you wouldn't be like Courtney about two weeks after we started hanging out. And I knew after our first date that you wouldn't care whether I had money or not. You truly liked me, and not what gifts I could offer you. Please, just understand."

My tears were falling faster at Santana's begging. God, I didn't know I could hurt this bad. I thought I had known pain before when I found out Sam had cheated on me. But this was worse. Finding out Santana had hidden something important from me for the past year and a half because she didn't trust me was way worse.

"I love you, San," I said quietly, trying to fight my tears. Santana's chocolate eyes were dark with pain and she swiped frustratedly at the tears on her face. "But you hurt me. I never thought you could hurt me like this. I'm sorry, but I need some time."

"What are you saying?" Santana asked, heartbroken.

I crossed my arms over my chest to hold myself together and looked up at the ceiling. I couldn't look at her right now or else I would crumble. "I need some time to think."

"Brittany, please," Santana begged, sobbing. "I love you. Don't do this."

I choked on a sob. "Please, just give me time."

Santana sniffled for several moments. "How long?"

I shrugged helplessly. "I don't know."

"I'll go stay at my old place," Santana said quietly, trying to sound strong. "Do you not want me to call you or anything?"

I looked at the ground. I wanted to pull her into my arms so bad. I needed time to think, but I couldn't separate myself from her completely. "Text me when you get there," I said softly.

I heard her give a relieved sigh. "Please promise me something?" Santana asked. I looked up at her then so she knew I was listening. "Please don't let this ruin us."

My breath was sucked out of my lungs. I couldn't imagine not having Santana. I hated the thought of losing her, as much as I hated the thought that she thought I could ever stop loving her.

"I love you too much to let that happen," I told her honestly.

She let out a strangled sob, one I knew meant she was relieved I was still invested in our relationship. She nodded in acknowledgement and went to the bedroom to pack some things. I stayed where I was until she came back out with a bag.

"I'll text you later. I love you," she said quietly.

I bit my lip and nodded. "I love you too," I whispered, unable to let her leave without letting her know that.

Santana reluctantly turned and left. Once I heard her car drive off, I went back to the bedroom and crawled into bed where I grabbed her pillow and held it tightly as I sobbed. I sobbed until I fell asleep.

I awoke sometime later surrounded by fur. Lady was lying in Santana's spot on the bed, her head on the pillow in my arms. She looked at me with sad eyes. Lance was cuddled up behind me, his head on my hip. Lord Tubbington was down by my feet. This was what they had done for me all of the nights I had come home depressed and lonely before Santana. They hadn't had to do it in so long though, that I was surprised they remembered what to do.

Santana's scent on the pillow almost sent me into another crying fit, but Lady gave me a delicate lick on my cheek.

"I know," I told the dog, patting her gently. "I miss her too."

The thought of my missing fiancée made me remember that she was supposed to text me when she got to the apartment. I moved the dogs out of my way so I could get up. I stumbled my way back to the living room where I found my cell phone on the coffee table. I had five missed texts and a missed call from Santana. She was clearly worried about me since I hadn't answered her texts, but her last text said she was sorry for hurting me and she would give me my space. I didn't want her thinking that I was ignoring her.

 _Sorry I missed your texts. I was in the bedroom and fell asleep but left my phone in the living room- Brittany_

Santana's reply came almost immediately.

 _It's okay, I was just worried. I miss you already- Santana_

I closed my eyes in pain. God, I missed her. I opened my eyes to see the bright lights on our Christmas tree which we had put up last week. The festive decorations around me were in direct contrast to my mood.

 _I miss you too. So do the dogs and Lord Tubbington- Brittany_

 _Give them all a hug and kiss for me please?- Santana_

I smiled a little at her love for our pets. She adopted them into her life as if they were always hers.

 _I will- Brittany_

 _Do you know how long you will need to think?- Santana_

I paused. I honestly had no clue. I hadn't even thought about the whole situation really at all yet. I needed to think about how I felt about what happened and what I wanted to do. I really didn't want to cancel the wedding. I wanted to marry Santana. I knew that I still wanted to marry her more than anything. But we needed to work this situation out. I needed to know that there wasn't anything else I needed to worry about.

 _I'm not sure. I promise I will call you tomorrow though- Brittany_

 _Okay. I love you more than anything. You know that right?- Santana_

Tears started to pool in my eyes now, although these were less from pain and more from the love I felt for my beautiful girl.

 _I know. And I love you so, so much. I will talk to you later- Brittany_

I curled up on the couch under a blanket and turned the TV on to have some background noise. I always needed some kind of noise in order to think. Silence was too deafening for me and I couldn't concentrate without some noise.

I thought back on my relationship with Santana. I had pretty much loved her from the moment I met her, but even then it had taken me some time to open up to her. I didn't hold it against Santana that she didn't divulge her financial situation right away. But it was something she should have told me after we became serious.

It hurt me that she had kept it a secret even after all of this time. She could have told me after we first told each other we loved each other. She could have told me when I gave her the trip to Ireland as a gift. She seemed to have wanted to say something then, now that I thought about it, but she still didn't.

I opened up to her and told her everything as our relationship progressed. I had no secrets from her. I told her my past, my fears, my hopes, and my fantasies. I thought she had done the same for me. I mean, yeah, we hadn't talked about how much money either of us had. That wasn't appropriate. I was going to talk to her about opening a joint bank account before the wedding since I wanted to share everything with her. If she wanted to keep money to herself I had no problem with that. But I figured a joint account meant that it would be easier to pay our combined bills and everything.

I wondered if maybe part of her hesitation to say anything about her money was because she didn't want to share finances. I wouldn't expect to have access to her trust fund or any of that money from her parents. That was _her_ money and she could do whatever she wanted with it. If she wanted to share it or use it on us, then that was her prerogative. But I would never ask her to do that. She could contribute as much or as little as she wanted to financially.

Doing more thinking made me realize that I had been kind of an idiot about financial things with us in the past. I had just assumed that Santana had student loan debt. She had never said anything about having any loans or indicated that she needed to make any sort of payments of that sort. In fact, she usually made it a point to go shopping with me as much as possible so she could pay for everything. It was her way to contribute since I had adamantly refused to let her do it any other way. And that was all on me.

Santana had told me repeatedly that she could pay more for bills and on the mortgage. She had said many times that she could afford more than what I was allowing her to put forth. I wouldn't even hear her arguments to the contrary of what I believed to be the truth. I was so stupid about that.

But she still should have told me. She shouldn't have waited until I confronted her after an argument and a discussion with her brother about it. We had been dating for over a year and a half and been engaged for almost six months. I was her fiancée and she should be able to trust me with anything. It made me worry that there were other things she was hiding from me.

I realized that was the biggest problem I had with the situation. It wasn't the money at all. It was the fear that Santana hadn't told me everything like I had done with her.

I didn't know if I could be in a marriage with someone who hid things from me. I had thought Santana was fully honest about everything. She was the one who first confessed she had feelings for me. She was the one who said 'I love you' first. She was the one who was so open about her feelings from the beginning. Was I wrong to believe she was an open book with me?

I thought for hours. I went to bed exhausted from the emotional turmoil, surrounded by our pets. Santana's scent both comforted me and saddened me. Even though I was exhausted, I slept fitfully. I couldn't sleep well without Santana by my side. I wondered if she was having the same trouble.

I woke up the next morning, a Sunday, knowing what I needed to do.

"Hey," I greeted Santana when she answered her phone.

"Hi sweetie," she said. "Did you sleep okay?"

"No," I answered truthfully. "I couldn't sleep without you."

"Me neither," Santana replied. "I miss you so much."

I could hear the threat of tears in her voice, and I could feel emotion start to clog my throat. "I miss you, too," I said quietly. "Do you think you could meet me for breakfast somewhere?"

"Absolutely, yes," Santana said. "Tell me where you want to meet and I will be there."

I named a restaurant near the house, and agreed to meet her in about an hour. "We need to talk, San," I told her.

"I know," she said sadly.

We got off the phone and went to get ready. This was a talk that could potentially change the course of our plans for the future.

 **A/N: Surprise! I know I said I wouldn't update until Monday, but I realized that I have way too much going on tomorrow to be able to post, so I did it today. I'm sure y'all are disappointed!**

 **Looks like they finally had that talk about their finances. Yikes! Obviously it was something they shouldn't have let wait this long, but at least it happened, right? Who do you guys think was more in the wrong- Brittany for never letting Santana contribute even though she said she had money, or Santana for not telling Brittany about her inheritance? Or do you think they were both equally to blame? I know several of you already predicted Santana was rich, so you guys were right. Clearly there was a reason why she was keeping it a secret though, even though she should have told Brittany.**

 **Do you think Brittany overreacted a little? Or do you think she really was justified since Santana had kept something important from her for so long? Do you guys think they will work things out quickly, or will it take time? I mean, they're supposed to be getting married! We don't want anything to jeopardize that, right?**

 **I hope you all had a great holiday!**


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

My heart skipped a beat when I saw Santana walk up to me just inside the restaurant. She looked so beautiful in her jeans and sweater, her jacket open and her gorgeous hair loose over her shoulders. My hands itched to bury themselves in it as they usually did.

"Hi," she said quietly, giving me a timid smile.

I could see her arms twitch as she held back from reaching out to hug me. I didn't like that she second guessed herself around me now.

"Hey," I replied, stepping into her and opening my arms to wrap around her.

She buried her nose into the crook of my neck and inhaled as she squeezed me hard. I turned my head and pressed a kiss into her hair as I held her. I didn't know how long we stood there in the waiting area of the restaurant just hugging. We finally pulled back and we both swallowed hard, our eyes a glistening a little from unshed tears.

We were sat at a table quickly and we kept conversation light until we placed our orders.

"San," I said.

"Look," Santana said at the same time.

We both paused and smiled a little at each other.

"You go first," Santana told me.

I took a deep breath, preparing myself for what I wanted to say.

"I understand why you didn't tell me at first," I said. "But I am still upset that you never told me after all of this time."

"I know, babe," she said. "And I am so, so sorry for not telling you."

I nodded, knowing that she was telling me the truth. I could see the regret and pain in her eyes.

"I really wish you would have told me a long time ago. But I know now." I paused, unsure how to say the next part. "I need to know if there is anything else you've kept from me."

Santana's eyes widened a little in surprise. She shook her head adamantly in the negative. "No, Brittany," she quickly assured me. "I promise that you know everything else."

"Okay," I said, relieved. I could see the honesty in her response.

"Well," Santana began, looking a little apprehensive. My heart pounded in fear. "I mean, the only other thing I've been keeping from you is where I've been planning on going for our honeymoon. But I can totally tell you if you want me to!"

I almost laughed in relief, but the actual fear in Santana's eyes that I would be upset with her for keeping our honeymoon destination a secret sobered me.

"Tana," I said softly, covering her hand on the table with my own. "I don't need you to tell me that."

To my surprise, Santana's eyes became more hurt instead of relieved. "Oh. So we're not? I mean… you don't-"

My face scrunched up in confusion as I tried to figure out what was going on. Suddenly, it hit me. My jaw dropped and I hurried to correct Santana.

"No! I mean, yes we are still getting married," I told her. "I want to marry you, baby. And I know that you are being completely honest with me about everything, so I can marry you without any fears. I just meant that you don't have to tell me about our honeymoon because you can still make it a surprise."

Santana let out a relieved breath, her whole body sagging as the tension left her. "Oh thank God! I was afraid I had ruined everything," she said shakily.

"You didn't."

The server came by with our food just then and interrupted us. We thanked her and turned our attention to our food. I dug in eagerly to my pancakes, the sick feeling I had lying heavily in my stomach from yesterday rapidly disappearing.

We were silent for a few moments as we ate. "So, I want you to know that I fully trust you with all of the money," Santana said suddenly. "I want to give you full access to the accounts."

I was surprised and not the least bit happy to hear Santana's offer. I shook my head vehemently. "I don't want that, San," I said honestly. "That is _your_ money. I don't want or need access to it."

Santana looked at me with love and determination. "Sweetie, once we get married it will be _our_ money," she explained to me. "I want you to be able to use it. I know you aren't with me because you want my money. You love me and I love you. It was always my intention to give you full rights to the money when we got married."

"I don't want it," I said firmly. "I make plenty of money to pay the bills and help take care of us in our marriage. I don't need yours."

Santana gave me a knowing smile. "Just like I didn't need yours, yet you wouldn't let me pay," she said softly.

My words died in my throat. I was an idiot. I gave a frustrated sigh. "I'm sorry."

She chuckled. "It's okay," she said honestly. "I know you were just trying to take care of me how you thought best. But our marriage is supposed to be a partnership, so I need to be able to take care of you as much as you take care of me. This needs to be equal, so my money is your money."

"San," I breathed. "I love you so much, and I realize that I was wrong before. I know that we need to be equals, and we need to split our bills. But I don't want access to your money. That was from your parents and it was meant for you."

"Brittany," Santana sighed. "You're not going to budge on this, are you?"

I shook my head. "No. But we can figure out how we can more fairly divide our expenses."

Santana rolled her eyes a little but I saw the hint of a smile. "You realize that I am just going to find ways to spend money on you and us to make it more even then, right?"

"Yeah, I know," I sighed. "But it is your money and you can do whatever you want with it. I just don't want anything to do with it."

"I love you so much," Santana told me with a tender smile.

I smiled lovingly back at her. "I love you, too."

"So are you going to let me pay for the wedding?"

"No, we can split that," I said. "I want to be a part of making our wedding beautiful. I've wanted nothing more in my life than to marry you, and I don't want you to pay for everything. Like you said, it should be equal, so our partnership should start out that way for our wedding."

"Okay," she agreed easily. "But what about the honeymoon? I mean, you paid for the whole trip to Ireland."

I hesitated. I knew she was right. It was only fair. "Okay, you can pay for the honeymoon," I said, and she grinned in triumph. "But don't go too overboard please!"

I don't even know if she heard my request. She was too happy with her victory. I didn't even care. She looked so adorable and lighthearted.

We finished our breakfast, and, as usual when we went out, Santana paid for the meal. I understood her insistence to pay a lot better now. We slowly made our way back to the front of the restaurant.

"So, if you want to go back and get your stuff you can come back home," I said quietly.

"Or I can just follow you home now," she said with a guilty look. "I kind of brought my stuff with me."

I gave her a look. "Did you know I was going to let you back that easily?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "I just really hoped that you would let me come back home."

"Well I hoped you would come back home soon, too."

We went ahead and made our way back to our cars and Santana followed me home. The dogs were so excited to see Santana when she got home. She kneeled down on the floor and hugged them both enthusiastically, letting them give her kisses all over her face as she told them how much she missed them. Lady was whining like crazy at seeing her other mommy back home, so Santana gave her some extra loves. Even Lord Tubbington came up and rubbed himself along Santana's legs. He even deigned to let her scratch him under his chin before he scampered off again.

"Tubbs missed you, too," I said, giggling.

"Looks like it," she agreed, grinning.

I suddenly yawned, feeling extremely tired after a bad night's sleep and stressful night and morning.

"Tired?" Santana asked, cupping my cheek.

I nodded. "Yeah. I think I am gonna go take a nap."

"Okay," she said, looking down at the floor bashfully.

"Did you want to come lay down with me?" I asked shyly.

It may take us a few days to get back to normal, but I knew we would get there.

Her eyes met mine and she smiled so happily. She nodded, so I took her hand in mine and led her down the hallway to our bedroom. I changed into some more comfortable clothes while Santana went to wash the dog slobber off of her face. She came back and changed into some sweats before joining me under the covers. She spooned herself behind me, wrapping her arm around my waist. I felt her lips graze a soft kiss to my shoulder before she buried her face in my hair.

"I love you," I mumbled, sleep already starting to claim me.

"You have no idea how much I love you," she whispered, and that was the last thing I remembered before I sunk into blackness.

When we woke up from our nap we just spent time relaxing the rest of the day. Neither of us wanted to jump back into wedding planning after our argument yesterday, although we were still going to be getting married as planned. We just wanted to take the time to reconnect and take our minds off of the things causing us the most stress lately.

Santana made dinner that night, and was extra giving with her touches and embraces. I made sure to tell her I loved her and return her embraces without pause throughout the day. We really just needed to take the time to concentrate on our relationship.

When I woke up the next morning I felt a dull, steady ache in my shoulder. I thought it must have been from the stress lately.

"You okay babe?" Santana asked sleepily, catching me rotating my arm to try to alleviate the pain.

"Yeah, I think I just slept on my shoulder wrong or something," I said. "Go back to sleep."

"Mmmkay," Santana mumbled.

I got up and started my normal morning routine. My shoulder started to feel better once I was in the hot shower, so I figured that it must have been a combination of being tense from the argument and sleeping on it wrong.

I walked out of the bathroom wrapped in my towel with my hair still a little damp, rotating my shoulder a bit to try to work out the rest of the pain.

"You sure you're okay?" Santana asked, concerned, as she got out of bed to start getting ready for work.

I nodded. "It's feeling better already," I told her. "The shower helped a lot."

Santana gave me a small smile before leaning up to give me a good morning kiss. I grabbed my clothes for the day and got dressed before I went into the kitchen to make myself something to eat. Santana had already started making her coffee so it would be ready when she was out of the shower. I made myself some toast and pulled out some grapes for the both of us.

Santana joined me in the kitchen after her shower. She still wasn't dressed for the day. She didn't have to be to work until about an hour after I did, so she didn't need to be ready quite as early. She had only started getting up earlier in the day to eat breakfast with me before I left for work.

She poured herself a cup of coffee and grabbed a granola bar and a banana before joining me at the table. She popped some grapes into her mouth, grinning at me in thanks for getting the fruit out to share.

"How did you sleep?" I asked, knowing she hadn't gotten much sleep the night we were apart either.

"Really well. A lot better being next to you again." I smiled sweetly at her, which she returned. "How about you?"

I felt really tired still for some reason, even though we had taken a nap yesterday and I did sleep better last night than the night before. "I slept okay," I said honestly. "It was a lot nicer having you with me."

Santana frowned a little. "Just okay? You do look a little tired, Britt. Are you getting sick?"

I shook my head. "I don't think so. I think I just maybe took too long of a nap yesterday so I didn't sleep quite as deeply last night. But I did get a lot more sleep last night with you than the night before."

Santana didn't seem appeased, but she let it go. I finished my breakfast and then went to finish getting ready for work. I petted the dogs and gave Santana a final kiss before I headed off to work. I texted Santana as I usually did when I made it to work, and she let me know she was getting ready to leave for her work now. We both kept in touch with each other throughout the day to make sure there were no incidents or anything that we needed to be made aware of. Also, because we just liked to let each other know what was going on in our days.

I went into work and wasn't happy to discover that my shoulder started to hurt again. I took out the bottle of anti-inflammatories from my drawer and popped a couple. Gus smiled at me when he saw me.

"How's the wedding planning going?" Gus asked, genuinely curious.

I sighed. "We hit a little snag over the weekend, but things seem to be back on track now."

"Nothing too serious, I hope?"

I gave a small smile. "Not anymore. We had a little argument, but everything is okay."

He frowned a little. "Wedding planning can be stressful, but you shouldn't let it get to you that much. You shouldn't fight about it."

"It wasn't that," I began before I paused. I wasn't sure how much I should tell him, but he was really actually my best friend besides Santana and Gabe. "I found out she hadn't told me something although it was something that she shouldn't have kept from me. It wasn't anything serious, I just got upset that she hadn't told me. We ended up fighting and I realized that I was actually being kind of an idiot about the whole thing since I had made assumptions in the first place which caused me to believe something that was wrong, but Santana didn't correct it. Anyways, we talked it through and we figured it all out, and wedding planning can recommence with the normal stressors."

Gus studied me for a moment before he nodded. "You girls have one of the strongest relationships I've seen, so I'm sure you got everything straightened out. Just don't let planning your wedding get in the way of the love you have for each other."

I smiled gratefully at his concern for me and Santana. "We won't. Thanks, Gus."

He nodded in acknowledgement and turned back to his work. Santana and I texted throughout the day as we usually did. Our routine was back to normal, and the issues from the weekend were moving behind us.

Wedding planning definitely went a lot smoother after that. Now that I wasn't so concerned about money, making decisions on what we wanted on our big day was easy. The expense of the flowers didn't bother me, just as the cost of the jazz band we liked didn't bother me. The wedding was still going to be small, but it was going to be elegant. It was going to be beautiful.

The months flew by. The stress was still there, but it wasn't nearly as bad. The anticipation was growing. I couldn't wait to marry Santana, and she was obviously getting more giddy as the day grew nearer.

My shoulder hurt off and on over the months leading up to the wedding. I wasn't exactly sure what was going on. I wrote it off to stress, I wrote it off to sleeping wrong, I wrote it off to my muscle weakness putting strain on the joint. I tried sleeping more on my other side, but then the other shoulder started to hurt a little bit. I ended up taking more painkillers. I was able to keep it from Santana most of the time, but she caught me every once in awhile grimace in pain. I always explained it away, and she let it go. I didn't want her to worry about it with the wedding coming up.

Santana's girlfriends wanted to throw us a joint bachelorette party. I had a small one before I married Sam, but I was young and couldn't really get into a bar or anything. I still didn't drink, so not too much had changed, but Santana deserved to have a final big bash as a single woman and she wouldn't go unless I did. So we went out.

"I love you shooo mush," Santana slurred into my ear as we danced at yet another club. She was pretty drunk thanks to the never-ending drinks her friends were plying her with. She was still adorable, but I much preferred sober Santana.

"I love you too, baby," I replied, smirking at her uncoordinated dancing. I was mostly just holding her as she wobbled on her heels.

I spied my sister who was happily drunk and chatting with Gus' wife Sandy at our table, who was the designated driver for the rest of the group. Santana's other friends were on the dance floor somewhere. I didn't care so much where they were. It wasn't that I didn't like them, it was just that Santana wasn't all that close to them like she was her brother or Kyle, so I didn't know them all that well.

Then my eyes landed on a sight I absolutely did not want to see. I froze and Santana, despite her drunkenness, was alert enough to realize I was no longer moving with her.

She frowned at me. "Whass wrong? Why'd you ssstop?'

"Santana!"

Santana scowled as she heard the voice. "That sounds like…"

She looked at my angry face and turned to see the object of my disdain. "Fuck," she muttered.

"How are you?" Courtney asked.

I pulled Santana into my side with my arm wrapped around her waist. "She's fine," I told the woman. " _We're_ fine."

Courtney glanced at me, acknowledging that I was there. To my surprise, she gave me a polite smile. "You guys look happy," she said.

"We are," Santana told her. "We're getting married next week! We are going to become Mrs. and Mrs. Lopez."

I had told Santana months ago that I wanted to take her last name. I didn't want a reminder of Sam with a hyphenated name, and I never went back to my maiden name so it didn't make sense to have Pierce be an option. I would be much happier being a Lopez anyways. I wanted to be completely Santana's.

Courtney's eyes widened in surprise at the news before they flew to our left hands. She couldn't see my ring because I was using that arm to hold Santana, but Santana's hand was thrust out toward her ex-girlfriend to show her the ring on her finger.

"Wow!" Courtney exclaimed. "That's amazing!"

I frowned as I tried to figure out if she was being sincere. She actually gave us both a genuine grin.

"It is! I love her so much," Santana said. I noticed that her drunken slurring had improved in the face of the other brunette. Santana's arms wrapped around my waist as she snuggled her head on my shoulder. I tightened my arm around her and pressed a kiss onto her head before turning back to Courtney.

"I'm really happy for you Santana," she said sincerely. "You too, Brittany."

Wow, she actually remembered my name. She must truly be sincere.

"Look," Courtney began, "I just wanted to apologize to you Santana. I was a total bitch before and I didn't even realize how badly I treated you. I was selfish, and I hurt you. But I'm glad that you found someone that truly loves you. I can see that you found the woman you were meant to be with."

She smiled at me when she said that, and I couldn't help but smile back at her in thanks.

"I did," Santana agreed. "Brittany is my soulmate, and I love her more than I've ever loved anyone else."

I could see the hint of hurt flash in Courtney's eyes at that, but she nodded.

"Thank you for your apology though," Santana finished.

"Congratulations to you both," Courtney said, meeting my eyes. I could see she felt guilty for how she had treated Santana, but she knew that Santana was happier with me than she had been with her.

"Thank you," I said.

Courtney gave us a final nod and turned and walked away.

"That was weird," Santana said to me as she slumped into me.

I struggled to hold her weight since I had gotten pretty tired from all of the dancing. Santana seemed to realize it and stood back up quickly. She stumbled a little and I could see she was still pretty drunk.

"It was," I agreed. "Baby, listen… I am getting tired. If you want to stay out then Sandy can give you a ride home, but I think I want to get to bed."

My mood to party was pretty much gone now after the talk with Courtney. Not that it had gone badly. It just reminded me of a time when Santana had been hurt by the woman, and it angered me. I didn't want to be angry anymore, especially since Courtney had apologized. But the woman had hurt the woman I loved and I couldn't just get over it right away.

Santana frowned at me. "Are you okay? Did you take your pill?"

I nodded, letting her know that I had indeed taken my pills on time today.

"Do you need to go home and rest?"

"I'm starting to feel a little weak," I said. It was the truth. We had been dancing for quite awhile, and it was late. I really just wanted to go home now.

Santana nodded, her face concerned. "Okay, we can go home."

"If you want to stay San, you can," I said.

She shook her head. "No, I am pretty partied out. Plus, I would rather be at home in bed with you," she said honestly.

I grinned at her. I loved the fact that she would rather be with me than out partying, even if I was cutting our night short. I gave her a firm peck before I grabbed her hand and led her off of the dance floor toward our table.

"Hey girls!" Bonnie greeted us enthusiastically. "Who was that chick talking to you before?"

"My ex," Santana said bluntly.

Sandy's eyes widened and Bonnie's jaw dropped.

"Don't worry, she was just congratulating us on our upcoming wedding," I reassured them. "She was actually pretty pleasant."

Neither of the women knew the exact story of what Courtney had done to Santana, but they both knew that the relationship had not ended well. So I could understand their skeptical looks when I said that the exchange had gone well.

"Are you guys taking a break?" Sandy asked to change the subject.

"Actually, I think we're going to go home," I said.

"Are you okay, Britt?" Bonnie asked, suddenly concerned.

I smiled at my sister to let her know I was fine. "I'm just ready to call it a night, and San doesn't want to stay here without me."

Both women smiled at that, knowing how much we preferred being with each other.

"Did you need a ride home?" Sandy asked.

I shook my head. "No, I can drive. Bonnie, did you want a ride back or are you going to stay?"

Bonnie was staying at our house tonight for the bachelorette party. Chase and Adam were at our parents' house in Lima, and she was going to join them again tomorrow.

"I'll come with you, if you don't mind," my sister said.

"I need to find the other girls and see if they are going to hang around," Santana told me.

I nodded to her and sat down at the table to wait for her. She returned a few moments later with the three other women who had come out with us.

"Sandy, are you okay to drive these girls back to Cassie's place for the night?" Santana asked.

"Absolutely," she said. "Are you ladies ready to leave, too?"

The women nodded. Apparently the party was over for the night once the bachelorettes decided to go home.

I helped my tipsy fiancée out to our car, and my sister followed us. Thankfully Bonnie wasn't quite as drunk as Santana and could walk just fine. Sandy and the other women headed out and drove off. I got in the car and rubbed my shoulder a bit before I buckled my seatbelt.

I saw Santana frown at me out of the corner of my eye, but she didn't say anything so I ignored it. I drove us home, grateful to pull in the driveway as my eyes were getting more tired.

Bonnie immediately went off to the guest bedroom to go to sleep, and I took care of the dogs while Santana drank some water. When we were finished, we went and got ready for bed. I washed my face while Santana changed into her pajamas. I had just pulled the anti-inflammatory bottle out of the cabinet when Santana walked in.

"Brittany, what's going on with your shoulder?" Santana asked, frowning.

I looked at her guiltily. "I don't know," I said. "It's been bothering me off and on for awhile, but I don't know why."

"Why haven't you told me?" She asked, hurt and worry evident in her voice.

"I didn't want to worry you, San," I said. "With the wedding and everything coming up, I didn't want you to stress over a little bit of pain."

"Sweetie," Santana said, taking my hands in hers, "I love you and I am always going to worry about you. You're going to be my wife. You need to tell me if something is wrong."

"I know, but I honestly don't think it's that big of a deal," I protested. "It isn't that bad and it comes and goes. I think it just might be stress or something."

Santana's brow furrowed. "Stress? Like, you're stressed about getting married?"

I could hear the anxiety my poor choice of words caused her. "No!" I exclaimed. "No. I want to marry you more than I've ever wanted anything. I just meant stress from all of the planning and everything. It was a lot to do."

Santana nodded, but she didn't look relieved. "Do you… Do you think you're stressed because you're thinking about Sam?"

I had not been expecting that. I knew my face must have shown complete shock. I hadn't even thought about Sam having to do with my stress. But thinking about it now, I knew that wasn't it.

"No, I haven't been thinking about Sam," I said, a little guilty.

"It would be okay if you did," Santana said. "He was your husband and you loved him. And now you're getting married to someone else…"

She trailed off, the indication clear. She was worried that I felt like I was betraying Sam somehow.

"Santana," I began, "I want you to understand something. I loved Sam. I truly did. But what I felt for him doesn't even compare to what I feel for you. It may sound bad of me to say that, but it's true. Sam was my best friend and my partner, but I loved him more as my friend than I did as my partner. You are my soulmate. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone or anything. You make me happier than I've ever been. I want nothing more than to spend forever with you. And I know that Sam would be happy for us."

Santana's eyes filled with tears. "Really?"

I nodded, my own emotions getting to me. "Really. You are my other half."

"And you're mine, Britt," she said, pulling me in for a hug.

I wrapped my arms tightly around her and winced as pain shot through my shoulder. Santana felt me tense a little at the pain, and she pulled back to scowl at me, wiping at the tears that had escaped her eyes.

"Don't hide your pain from me anymore," she scolded me. "You need to tell me if you're hurt or weak or sick."

"I know," I agreed. "I'm sorry."

"Just promise me that if it gets worse or it doesn't go away then you will go to the doctor," she said, worry clouding her eyes.

A sick feeling settled in my stomach. The thought of going to the doctor worried me. I already went to the doctor enough to monitor my myasthenia gravis. I was worried that they might find something else wrong with me. But I couldn't say no to Santana.

"I promise. Now let's go to sleep," I said, smiling softly at her. I took a couple of pills and we headed out of the bathroom.

We got in bed and I curled myself around Santana. I wrapped my arm around her waist and my shoulder hurt a little, but I pushed the pain down. I thought about the pain. It worried me that it had been going on this long. I knew that it probably wasn't going to get better at this point. And the fact that my other shoulder was starting to hurt more often bothered me. I didn't want something else to be wrong with me. I didn't want to put that on Santana.

But I knew that I would keep my promise. If it didn't get any better, I would go to the doctor. I only hoped that it was the stress of wedding planning that was causing the pain and that it would go away after the wedding. Santana was sleeping peacefully in my arms. I placed a soft kiss to the back of her neck, and her scent started to relax me enough to fall asleep.

 **A/N: Awww, they couldn't stay apart from each other for too long! Everything was resolved and they cleared it all up. Hopefully no more secrets with that, and money shouldn't be an issue anymore. And it looks like most people are in agreement that they were both to blame for the problems.**

 **It looks like we maybe got a bit of a resolution with Courtney. Maybe she truly realized she did wrong and grew up a little bit. What do you guys think?**

 **The wedding is around the corner! Are you excited for it? What do you think about them being Mrs. and Mrs. Lopez? Brittany really wants to be completely Santana's. Do you think maybe she is being a bit harsh by moving on from Sam so much? Or do you think she is right in leaving him mostly in the past?**

 **Something seems to be up with Brittany's shoulder. Do you think it is anything serious? Or was it just stress or something from all of the wedding stuff?**

 **Let me know what you guys think!**

 **As a final note, I just wanted to say to the person(s) leaving hateful comments that I don't know what you are trying to accomplish by doing so. If you don't like my story, then don't read it! I sure as hell am not going to even know or care that someone who doesn't like what I write doesn't read it. I hope you have a good life and find happiness elsewhere.**

 **To all of the people who come here because they enjoy my story: thank you! You guys are amazing and I am in awe that you continue to come back for more! Even if you don't review, I appreciate you reading. (Though reviewing is nice too)**


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

I was so nervous. I paced my dressing room for the wedding restlessly, my sister and mother watching me with patient eyes. I was already in my off-white off the shoulder dress, the skirt of it trailing a little behind me. My hair was half up, the rest of it hanging in curls down the back of my neck. I was completely ready for the wedding physically, but my mind was freaking.

I wasn't nervous about marrying Santana. I was nervous that something was going to go wrong. I wasn't this nervous on my first wedding day, but I wanted this so much more than I had ever wanted anything.

I wanted to marry the beautiful girl that was supposed to be on the other side of the building putting the final touches on her wedding day look. But there was this irrational fear that something was going to ruin our day. Whether it was Santana deciding she didn't want to marry me, or someone objecting to the wedding, or some unforeseen disaster, I just had this feeling inside of me that wouldn't go away.

I hadn't seen Santana since yesterday evening. She wanted to spend the night apart in anticipation for that moment when we first saw each other as we walked toward the altar. Of course we both regretted it after she went to stay with Gabe at her old apartment. Santana and I spent hours talking on the phone after she left, telling each other how much we missed the other and how we couldn't wait until the next day.

It wasn't until Bonnie yelled through my door late that night that we both needed to get some rest so we didn't have bags under our eyes for our wedding pictures that we said goodnight. I hung up with Santana feeling content and ready for our wedding. I was fine until I actually started getting ready. It was finally starting to become real. In just a short period of time I was going to marry the love of my life. As long as nothing went wrong.

"Brittany, just relax," my mom said soothingly.

"Santana's here, right? She's getting ready?" I asked, panic creeping a little into my voice.

"Yes, Britt," Bonnie assured me. "I checked on her not five minutes ago, and she was getting her make-up done. She looks beautiful by the way."

I couldn't stop my grin and the flutter of my heart at the words. Santana was almost ready. She was going to meet me at the altar. A little bit of my nervousness fled knowing that my bride-to-be was soon going to be my wife.

"The caterers are setting up, right? And the band is here?" I asked, needing to know that everything was going to go smoothly.

"Honey, everything will go perfectly," my mother told me, grabbing my arm to make me stop pacing. "You and Santana will be beautiful brides and will become wives, and the ceremony and reception will be great. You just need to calm down, otherwise you are going to get weak and that is the last thing you and Santana need today."

I realized my mom was right. I would make something go wrong by stressing about things that could possibly ruin our wedding day. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, shaking my arms out to loosen the tension that had creeped in.

Before I knew it, it was time to head to the entrance to the hall where we were holding the ceremony and reception. My mom and sister headed into the hall, and one of the workers from the venue stayed with me to let me know when it was time for me to enter.

Santana was on the other side of the wall to my right, standing at the other entrance that would lead her into the room. We had decided to not have anyone walk us down the aisle to give us away. It wasn't only because Santana didn't have a father to do the honors. We just didn't want anyone to give us away to each other. We wanted to give ourselves to each other, because that was what we felt our relationship was about.

So the plan was that we would enter the room at the same time and walk toward the altar from opposite sides, making our way toward each other before coming together at the altar. Gus was my best man and Gabe was Santana's. We had no one else in the bridal party. We didn't want a big fuss. We just wanted the people closest to us throughout our relationship to stand up there with us.

I heard the music that we had chosen to walk down the aisle to start, and the venue employee indicated to me that I could enter the hall. I took a breath to calm my pounding heart and took my steps into the hall toward my bride. I walked around the stage that was set up for the band and I saw Santana as I turned the corner.

My breath caught and my steps faltered as I saw how beautiful she looked. Every irrational fear I had felt earlier in the day flew away as I saw Santana walking toward me. I could feel the smile take over my face as happiness bubbled up from my chest and I continued to head toward my bride. She was wearing a sleek white dress that hugged her curves. It was strapless and had a slight flare starting below her knees. Her hair was in loose curls over her shoulders, just how I loved it. Her dark eyes were sparkling at me, and her smile was so big on her face that her dimples were showing.

My smile grew as I got nearer to Santana, until I could feel my cheeks hurting with how big it was.

"Hi," I said quietly once we reached each other.

"Hi," she said back, her eyes dancing over my face.

"You look so beautiful," I told her.

"You are breathtaking, Brittany," she whispered.

I vaguely noticed Gabe and Gus moving into their positions as the justice of the peace prepared to start the ceremony. My focus was all on Santana.

I said the words I needed to when prompted, and Santana did the same. Our eyes didn't break away from each other the whole time. I went first when prompted for our vows. We had written our own words for each other to express how we felt.

"Santana," I began, holding her hands in mine as I looked deeply into her eyes. "I knew I wanted you in my life from the moment I met you. I had never felt such a strong connection to anyone before. I thought you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen, and I was even more speechless than usual."

Santana gave a little laugh at that, tears starting to pool in her eyes. I could feel my own eyes starting to tear up as I continued. "I couldn't have imagined that you would ever have feelings for me, but I was so happy when I found out that you did. I fell in love with you so hard and fast, and I knew pretty quickly that I wanted this to last. I wanted us to be forever. I want to spend the rest of our lives making you happy. I want to be part of the reason you have a smile on your face. I want to build a life and a family with you. I want to give you enough love to fill your heart up to overflowing. I am so glad that you have chosen me to be your wife. That you chose me to be your forever. And I will do everything I can to give you the best life possible, if you will let me."

Santana's tears were leaving tracks down her cheeks as she cried silently. My tears finally spilled over my lids and I could barely make out Santana nodding to me in answer to my request. I felt something settle into my heart as she agreed to building a future with me.

"Brittany," Santana said as she began her vows. She took a breath and I followed suit, trying to calm my tears before she continued. "You are the best thing that ever happened in my life. You don't even know how strongly I felt for you from the beginning. I just knew that you were something special, and I couldn't help but fall for you. You are such a beautiful woman, inside and out. You are so strong and courageous and amazing, and I aspire to be more like you."

I shook my head a little at her, and she smiled a little at me knowing that I was arguing with her about that. She knew I thought she was perfect the way she was and wouldn't change anything about her.

"You were the perfect fit to the missing half of my heart. Sometimes I feel like I'm dreaming with how wonderful everything is with you, but then you kiss me or hold my hand, and I realize that reality is much better than anything I could have ever dreamed." I smiled at her as my tears slid down my cheeks. I understood the feeling perfectly. "I can't wait to start our married life together and start a family with you. You are my soulmate. I love you so much, and I will love you throughout this life and beyond. I am so happy to become your wife and to have you become mine."

We exchanged rings, sliding the matching wedding bands onto each other's fingers that we had gotten from our new favorite jewelry store. Finally, it was time for our kiss. I cupped Santana's cheeks with my hands, using my thumbs to gently wipe away the tear tracks on her skin before leaning down to press my lips to hers. Santana's hands came up to grasp the back of my neck, and our lips caressed each other's lovingly as we sealed our marriage with a kiss.

We grinned at each other happily when we pulled back, and I couldn't stop a giddy laugh from escaping. We turned to our best men and took back our bouquets and as we were pronounced Mrs. and Mrs. Lopez. Santana and I walked hand in hand down the aisle, smiling at our friends and family who had joined us for our special day.

The photographer took control then, posing us for pictures. I knew that I had a crazy in love look on my face as I looked at my new wife while our photographer snapped different shots of us. Santana was looking at me with just as intense of a look of love.

Finally, we were let go to celebrate. There were only about fifty people that we had invited to the wedding, and most of them showed up so it was easy to mingle and give our heartfelt thanks to our guests' congratulations. We danced in each other's arms, more content than ever before.

I hadn't had the courage to smash the cake into Santana's face when we cut our wedding cake, but she held no such reserves. She smeared frosting over my mouth and I tried to retaliate a little, but apart from getting a little frosting on her cheek, I was unsuccessful. She giggled at me while our guests laughed, but she made it up to me by kissing me passionately. She used her lips and tongue to remove the frosting and cake from my lips and cheeks, and I returned the kiss eagerly. Our guests cheered, and I was pretty sure Gabe told us to get a room.

I didn't even care. I was so beyond happy with this day. We partied late into the night until Santana realized I was starting to get sleepy. We had planned for a driver to take us back to our house for the night, so we said our goodbyes to the guests still lingering and ended the party. I knew my parents would set everything straight with the people at the venue if there was anything that needed to be settled, and I leaned into my tipsy wife as she leaned into my tired body as we made our way to our limo.

Santana pulled me into her for soft kisses as the driver took off.

"I love you wifey," she mumbled happily against my lips.

Hearing the word coming from her caused a giddy flutter in my chest. I smiled against her mouth. "I love you, too," I replied.

I continued kissing her, and our kisses grew more deep and passionate. We didn't even realize we had stopped in front of our house until the driver opened the back door and cleared his throat.

I blushed profusely as I got out of the car, embarrassed that the driver had caught us making out. I had been lying on top of Santana and her hands had been on my ass as I grinded down into her when he had opened the door. Santana just snickered and thanked the driver, giving him a tip before she linked her arm in mine and walked with me to our front door.

We were greeted by an empty house. Lord Tubbington was staying with Gabe while we went on our honeymoon, and the dogs were being boarded at the kennel. Santana had only told me that we were leaving early in the morning and that I needed to pack summer clothes. It didn't really narrow down where we were going, especially since Santana had done some of my packing for me so I didn't get any more clues as to where we were going.

I wanted to make love to Santana as my wife, and I started trying to take off of her dress once we reached our bedroom. She smirked at me, but helped me to remove it. She looked more pure than I had ever seen her. She was wearing a matching white lacy bra and panties instead of her usual black or red. I licked my lips in appreciation.

Santana moved to take off my dress and slipped it off of my body. I tried to tug her to the bed, but she wouldn't let me.

"Let me hang these up really quick babe," she said. "I don't want them to get ruined lying on the floor all night."

I pouted, but let her take care of the dresses. I decided to lie down on the bed and wait for her. I yawned and decided to rest my eyes for a moment.

The next thing I knew, I was being awoken by an alarm. I cuddled further into Santana as she reached behind her to turn it off.

"Good morning my beautiful wife," Santana murmured to me as she tucked my hair behind my ear after she silenced the alarm.

Her words made me grin as I remembered that we were in fact married now. Then I realized that we were both in our lingerie and I recoiled in embarrassed shock.

"Oh my God! I can't believe I fell asleep on you last night!" I exclaimed, looking at Santana in horror.

She chuckled at me. "Babe, it's okay," she assured me, cupping my cheek. "You were really tired last night, so don't worry about it."

"But I wanted to make love with you on our wedding night," I pouted.

Santana ran her thumb over my lips, tracing my pout away. "You can make it up to me on our honeymoon," she said flirtatiously.

"How about I make it up to you now?" I flirted back, wiggling my eyebrows at her as I leaned in for a kiss.

Santana kissed me back, but only briefly. She pulled away too quickly for my liking. "As much as I would love that, we can't. We need to be at the airport in like an hour, so hurry up and get ready," she told me.

"Seriously? What time is it?" I whined. I knew it was early because my alarm to take my morning pill hadn't even gone off yet.

"It's five o'clock," she replied. "Up! We've got to get a move on, my love."

I groaned at the early hour and lack of sleep from the night before. But excitement started to creep in as I realized we were going on our honeymoon. I would finally get to find out where Santana had arranged for us to celebrate the beginning of our marriage.

We hurried to get ready and Santana drove us to the airport. We went through the security check and I figured we were going on an international flight since Santana pulled out our passports. She wouldn't let me see our tickets though, so I didn't know where our final destination was. I only knew that we were going through Los Angeles.

It wasn't until we arrived at our gate for the next flight that I discovered we were going to Tahiti.

"Are you serious? Tahiti?" I asked incredulously. I couldn't keep the excitement out of my voice though, and Santana could hear it.

She gave me a satisfied grin. "That is correct," she said. "Two weeks in a private bungalow over the water. Just you and me and a beautiful view."

I smirked at her. "Hell, we could have stayed in our room and I still would have had the most beautiful view just by looking at you," I teased, pulling her by her waist into me.

She rolled her eyes but smiled back at me. "I think you have that backwards between you and me, but, regardless, we will not have to worry about anyone bothering us like we would at home."

"I'm not complaining," I told her before placing a soft peck on her lips. "I can't wait."

We sat in the lounge as we waited for our flight. Santana had booked us in business class so we had more room, and we got the extra perks with it. Finally, they called our flight to board.

"Are you ready Mrs. Lopez?" Santana asked me with a cheeky smile.

"Absolutely, Mrs. Lopez," I replied, and Santana's smile widened.

The flight was incredibly long, and I spent quite a bit of it sleeping. I am pretty sure Santana fell asleep for a bit, but she was awake before I woke back up. I was lying against her and her fingers were gently combing through my hair. It felt so nice that I almost didn't want to open my eyes and just go back to sleep.

"That feels good," I mumbled instead, my eyes fluttering open to see the seat back in front of us.

"Look who's finally awake," Santana teased, a smile evident in her voice.

"I can't help it. You're comfy," I defended myself, settling further into her to emphasize my point.

"Glad to be of service, babe. Even if it is just to be your pillow."

I turned my head then and pressed a kiss into her shoulder. "My very sexy pillow."

She laughed, and I lifted my face to hers so our lips could meet. Santana traced her lips softly over mine before she applied a little bit more pressure. I inhaled sharply at the feeling. I would never get tired of kissing her, and each time still felt a little bit like the first.

"We're going to be landing soon," she informed me when she pulled away.

I nodded in response and sat up. I winced a little at the ache in my shoulders and was dismayed by the little twinge of pain I felt in my fingers. Almost as if she couldn't stand not having contact with me, Santana's hand immediately followed my body and slid down my arm before intertwining our fingers together. I forgot all about my pain.

The landing was uneventful, and the wait to get our luggage seemed interminable. We finally got our bags and headed to the hired car Santana had arranged for us. I looked out the windows in awe at the beautiful scenery around us. My jaw dropped and I looked at Santana in surprise when we pulled up to the resort. It was so incredible. The bungalows over the water looked so peaceful and relaxing.

"It's beautiful San," I told her truthfully as I looked around our bungalow a short while later.

"So I did good?" Santana asked, looking for reassurance.

"Absolutely," I stated, grinning at her.

"So what would you like to do first?"

My grin turned into a smirk. "My wife," I husked, pulling her body into me.

Her lips turned up as her eyes danced between my mouth and my eyes. "Yeah?"

I nodded and cupped the back of her head to bring our mouths crashing together. "I love you," I breathed against her lips before Santana's hands tangled in my hair to pull my lips back to hers.

I felt her tongue trace my bottom lip and I eagerly parted them to give her access. Her tongue darted in and started caressing my own heatedly with long strokes. I couldn't prevent the moan from escaping into her mouth.

I needed her so badly. It had been days since we had made love, and I didn't want to wait anymore. I tugged at the bottom of her shirt and pulled it up. She lifted her arms to help me get it over her head. Santana quickly removed her bra and my hands immediately went to cup her naked breasts. She gasped in pleasure as my thumbs grazed over her hardening nipples.

I leaned down and sucked a nipple into my mouth, flicking my tongue against it while my hand continued to squeeze the other breast.

"Fuck, Britt," Santana moaned.

Her hands groped at my back, trying to tug on my shirt. She finally got a grip on it and pulled. I let go of her nipple with a pop so I could let her pull my top over my head. Her hands went to work on my bra while my hands went back to her breasts. My mouth found her neck and began sucking and kissing a trail along the supple curve up to the underside of her jaw.

I steered her toward the giant bed and the rest of our clothes quickly found the floor. I pushed Santana gently down on the bed and I followed her, crawling over her body as she moved up higher on the bed.

"You are so sexy," she murmured, trailing her hands up my stomach to my breasts.

Santana's hands squeezed gently before she pinched and rolled the nipples between her forefingers and thumbs. I shuddered and gasped. I lowered my body slowly to hers and my eyes closed in pleasure at the feeling of our naked bodies pressing together.

Santana wrapped her arms around my back and I kissed her deeply. My heart was pounding. Santana always made me feel so incredible. It was indescribable what she could do to me.

My hips started rocking down into hers, pressing our centers together and making us both gasp in pleasure. I leaned my forehead against hers and locked our eyes together as we rocked into each other.

"You feel so good, baby," I breathed.

She nodded and licked her lips, her breathing picking up. Santana's hand moved in between the small space between our bodies, and I arched my back enough to let her slide it all the way down to where I wanted it the most. It removed my wetness from hers, but I knew she would make it up to me and I would do the same to her.

Her fingers slid through my folds, tracing up from my entrance to my clit. I shivered as her fingers drew gentle circles over my clit and my hips started to roll against them. Suddenly, Santana's leg wrapped around my hips and she rolled me over onto my back. Her body settled against mine and she straddled my thigh. I could feel her wetness against my leg, but all thoughts of doing anything about it went out of my head as she slid two fingers deep inside of me.

I rolled my head back and Santana took advantage of the position to attack my neck with her mouth. Her plump lips trailed kisses over the sensitive skin before opening up and sucking the flesh hard into her mouth. Her tongue soothed it after she released it, only to move further down.

Her fingers were thrusting in and out of me at a blissful pace, and I was lost in a pleasured haze. I came a little more into myself when I felt her wetness spreading over my thigh as she thrust her center down onto my leg as she pumped her fingers in my core.

She curled her fingers and used the heel of her hand to rub my clit and I came suddenly. My orgasm crashed over me and I arched up into her, moaning out my release. She released my neck from her mouth and pulled back enough to watch me in my pleasure as she continued to thrust to help me ride it out.

Santana stilled her fingers when I relaxed, and then she started to roll her hips harder down onto my thigh. I didn't want her to come like that. I wanted to make her come with my fingers. I gripped her hips and rolled her suddenly, making her squeak in surprise.

Her fingers slipped out of me as I repositioned us, which caused me to shiver momentarily. But it was about her now, so I pushed my arousal down. My fingers found her dripping core and slid through her easily. I pressed a hard kiss to her lips before my mouth moved down to one of my favorite places on her body.

I licked and sucked at her breasts as I rubbed her clit. Santana arched her back up into me, pushing her breasts up into my mouth. I truly loved her tits, and she knew it. She knew how it drove me crazy when she wantonly pushed them into my mouth or my hands, like she needed me to devour them.

I sucked harder on her breasts, using my teeth to scrape and gently bite her nipples as I plunged a finger into her.

"More," she husked.

I complied quickly, withdrawing my finger to thrust right back in with two. I loved the feeling of her tight, wet heat around my fingers. I rested my forehead against her breastbone as I reveled in being able to touch her like this.

"Mmmm, Britt," Santana moaned as I thrust particularly deep.

I wanted to make her fall apart beneath me. But I could feel the twinge of pain start in my fingers. I pushed through it, keeping up the pace of my thrusts. I was rewarded by Santana's increased husky moans. I lifted my head to look at her, loving the sight of her head rolled slightly back and her bottom lip held tightly between her teeth. Her eyes were half-lidded when she tilted her head down to look at me.

She was so beautiful. I used my thumb to rub against her clit while I pumped in and out of her, and that's when the ache in my shoulder made an appearance. It was stronger than the pain in my fingers, and I couldn't really ignore this.

"Are you okay?" Santana asked breathily.

I must have winced from the pain in my shoulder. I didn't want to stop though, so I nodded and kept up my thrusting. I knew I needed to make her come quickly though, otherwise I wouldn't be able to ignore the pain anymore.

I curled my fingers inside of her and leaned down to suck her earlobe into my mouth. I released it and traced my tongue over the shell of her ear. She was really panting now, and I could feel her starting to tighten around my fingers.

"Come for me, Santana," I husked into her ear.

She moaned louder and I thrust hard into her a few more times, pushing through the increasingly painful twinges in my hand and shoulder, until she came hard. Santana groaned loudly, crying out my name as her body tensed with her orgasm. Her walls contracted around my fingers, and I almost cried out from the pain shooting through my hand and up my arm. I buried my face into her neck, biting my lip to stifle my groan of pain.

I held my arm still as Santana came on my hand, rolling her hips a little to ride out her climax. Her fingers tangled in my hair once her body relaxed, and she gave a satisfied chuckle.

"Fuck, that was so good," she murmured.

I whimpered and pulled my fingers out of her. I could feel the sting of tears in my eyes.

"Brittany, are you okay?" Santana asked, pulling her head back to look at me.

I tried to hide my face, but she wouldn't let me. I could see the concern in her eyes as I shook my head minutely and tears started to spill out of the corners of my eyes.

"Sweetie, what's the matter? Is it your shoulder?"

Santana rolled us over so I was on my back and she caressed my face, wiping some of my tears away with her thumb. I nodded pitifully as I started to cry harder.

"And my hands now, too," I admitted.

Santana's brow furrowed. "It's getting worse?" I nodded. "We need to get you to a doctor, Britt."

"No!" I exclaimed, shaking my head adamantly. "I don't want to ruin our honeymoon."

Santana opened her mouth to protest, but I cut her off. "I promise I will go to the doctor when we get home," I told her. "Just let us enjoy our honeymoon first. Please?"

She frowned at me. "I don't know if I can enjoy it if you're in pain," she whispered, her eyes dancing across my features as if to see if I was getting any worse.

"I just need to rest, and I will feel better," I lied. I hated not being honest with her. But I really didn't want to ruin our honeymoon by visits to the doctor who probably wouldn't be able to do anything here.

She looked skeptically at me. "I don't believe you."

"Please, San," I begged. "I just want to spend the next two weeks in paradise with my wife without having to worry about anything else. I promise to take it easy. Just, please…"

Santana searched my face. She didn't look pleased, but she ended up giving me a nod. "Okay," she said softly. "But if you start getting worse you need to tell me. And please don't hurt yourself anymore trying to have sex with me."

I rolled my eyes a little, fully intending to ignore that request, but she cupped my chin to get me to look at her. "Please promise me? I can't stand the thought of being the reason why you are hurting."

My heart broke a little at the pain in her eyes. "Okay." I nodded. "I promise."

Santana gave me a small smile and leaned down to press her lips softly against mine. "I love you. So much."

"I love you too, San."

Santana curled her body around mine and we rested. I wanted the next couple of weeks to go by smoothly. I couldn't hope for a pain free honeymoon, but I could do my best to make it enjoyable despite the limitations I knew would be placed on me and Santana due to my new health issue. I wanted to make this the best honeymoon I could for Santana and myself, even if it meant not making love like crazy like we wanted to in order to keep my promise to her. I would do anything to make her happy.

 **A/N: They got married! :) I couldn't resist putting a little bit of Brittany's freaking out on the show into this, and I thought it really fit well. What did you guys think about their wedding? Their wedding night was a little tame, sorry lol. What about Santana's surprise honeymoon destination?**

 **And how about Brittany's pain? It seems to be getting worse and showing no signs of going away. What do you think is going on with that? And now that Santana is freaking out about it, how do you think the rest of their honeymoon is going to go? Let me know what you guys think!**

 **So I know I got reviews for the last chapter but they are not showing up on here so I can't reply to anyone. I'm sorry! But once that gets fixed, I promise I will respond! Just know that I am not ignoring your reviews!**

 **And Happy New Year to everyone!**


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

The next two weeks were as perfect as they could be. My pain levels fluctuated, but they never ended up being as bad as they had the first day. Mostly I just felt really tired.

Santana understood when I felt like napping. She would mostly curl up and read a book while I slept. Sometimes she would cuddle up with me and either just hold me or fall asleep with me. I felt bad that I wasn't too active, but she told me that whatever I wanted to do on our honeymoon was perfectly fine. It was about us being together and doing whatever we wanted. And if I needed to rest, then she was always there to tuck me into bed.

Everything was beautiful. We did go out of our bungalow everyday into the water. I had to admit that swimming in the bright blue water felt really good. The exercise helped my shoulders, and Santana recognized that so she made it a point to get me out there every morning and afternoon. It did wear me out though, which was part of the reason why she didn't complain about my frequent naps.

I didn't really understand why I felt so tired all of the time. My muscles weren't weak, so I knew it wasn't related to my myasthenia gravis. I figured it had something to do with whatever was going on with the pain in my joints. Especially since I often woke up in the morning with the pain at its worst, and I just felt like I barely got a few hours of sleep even though I had been in bed for the whole night. They usually felt a bit better after the morning swim and some medication, but I always felt exhausted after that.

I knew Santana's concern was growing, but she didn't say anything. She just supported me silently, watching me closely with loving and scrutinizing eyes. If I showed any sign of discomfort, she was by my side to help me and offer me an anti-inflammatory or to tell me to rest. I loved her so much. She was truly the best thing to ever happen to me.

I still couldn't help but feel guilty. Here we were, on our honeymoon and just beginning our married life together, and I was making her worry. I just knew deep down that the news wouldn't be good once I did go to the doctor, and I hated that I would be putting that burden onto my wife when we should be in newlywed bliss. I couldn't help but think about the parallel between the last time I got married and my health issues. Could I never get a break?

My biggest relief was that Santana and I were still able to make love. If my hands or shoulders were feeling too bad, I had her sit on my face so I didn't have to put any pressure on them by holding myself in a good position. I definitely could say that I loved that position since it didn't hurt me and I could watch my beautiful, sexy wife come apart above me. If my joints were feeling good, then we would take each other however we wanted. She would always keep a close eye on me though, not wanting a repeat of our first day there when I pushed myself too far with my pain. It only made my heart expand with more love for her.

Despite the initial problems, we figured out what worked for us so we could both enjoy our gorgeous honeymoon. And we did, so much. Both of us were reluctant to return to the real world, enjoying spending time in paradise with just the two of us. I was also reluctant to go home since I knew it meant that I would have to find out what was wrong with me. I just wanted it to go away, but I understood that at this point it wasn't going to.

My first day back at work was a struggle. Santana clung to me as I was prepared to walk out of the door, and I held her as tightly as I could with the pain in my shoulders that was making itself very known that morning. She was concerned about me dealing with pain all day at work, but I couldn't let it control me. So I left her with a final, lingering kiss as she pouted and left.

The pain was definitely getting worse. Gus could tell that I wasn't feeling great, and he was awesome about picking up some of the slack on things my body just couldn't deal with. Santana kept texting me throughout the day while she was at work, and I assured her that I was okay. I called my doctor's office on my lunch break to set up an appointment before Santana called me on her break to check in again. Unfortunately, my doctor didn't have any appointments for a month, but there was a different doctor that could see me in a week. I scheduled it and hoped for the best.

"Hey baby," I answered the phone when Santana called on her break.

"Hi sweetie," she replied, and I immediately felt better hearing her voice. "How has your day been?"

"Pretty rough honestly," I told her. "Gus is helping me out a lot though, which is a relief. And I called the doctor. I have an appointment scheduled for next week."

"That far away?" Santana asked, frustration in her voice.

"I know San, but it was the earliest any of the doctors had available," I said with a sigh.

"I just hate watching you be in pain."

My heart broke a little at the small voice my wife said those words in. I knew how I would be feeling if our positions were reversed, so I couldn't blame her frustration and concern.

"I'm sorry," I apologized for no other reason than to be the cause of her emotional pain. If I could change it, I would.

"Don't apologize, Britt. It isn't your fault. Just promise me that you will try to get in sooner if the pain gets too bad."

"I promise." I meant that, too.

We both had to get back to work so we said our goodbyes with promises to see each other in just a few more hours at home. I had been keeping track of my pain over the past few weeks. I noticed that it was always bad when I first woke up in the morning, and it would usually get better throughout the day. It would get worse late at night when I was tired or if I was stressed. My hands were starting to hurt progressively worse, which made getting ready in the morning difficult. It was also starting to spread into my wrists and my feet were starting to hurt as well.

Santana knew that it had been getting worse. It came to be a big problem the Saturday morning after our first week back from Tahiti. Santana had woken me later in the morning with soft kisses to my neck. I knew she wanted to have sex, and a jolt of arousal shot through me. I was in pain, but I was determined to please my wife.

"Mmm, morning," I mumbled, my voice husky from sleep and arousal.

"Morning beautiful," my wife murmured against my skin before she sucked it into her mouth.

I inhaled sharply and my hips rocked involuntarily, seeking contact with something to ease the ache that had settled in my center. The movement caused a small twinge of pain to shoot from my hips up into my lower back, but I ignored it.

"Someone seems horny," I teased, my voice a little clearer after waking up a bit more from my pain.

"Shut up and let me make you come," Santana demanded hotly, bringing her mouth crashing to mine and effectively silencing any comeback I might have made.

I moaned into her mouth and she responded by slipping her hand down my pajama bottoms and snaking her fingers into my underwear. I was already dripping wet, and she pulled back to look at me with lust filled eyes as her fingers felt just how turned on I was for her.

"You're ready for me, aren't you?"

I bit my lip and nodded in response, her fingers stroking me stealing my words. I fought to keep my hips still so I could keep the pain to a minimum, but even spreading my legs further apart so Santana had better access hurt.

"You okay?" Santana asked, stilling her fingers briefly. I knew I hadn't been able to conceal my wince.

"Yeah, don't stop," I begged her, needing her to keep touching me.

She hesitated, so I moved my hand down to cover hers and started to move it against my folds. She took the hint and started to stroke again, concentrating on my clit with small circles.

"Fuck, you feel so good," I moaned.

Santana started kissing and sucking on my neck again, and I was panting into her ear as she slid two fingers easily inside of me. She started with a gentle rhythm, moving her fingers in and out of me slowly. She knew exactly what to do to drive me crazy.

She adjusted herself so she was lying more on top of me and straddled my leg. She increased the pace of her thrusts as she started to rock her hips against my thigh. I forced myself to ignore the pain the force of her body put onto my hip and concentrated instead on the feel of her fingers inside of me and the thumb she was now using to rub against my clit. That combined with the pleasure of her sucking on the spot on my neck that made me weak was enough to send me over the edge.

My orgasm hit me and my body tensed up, causing my joints to scream in pain. My pleasure waned but my body wasn't able to stop its tensing as my orgasm continued. My moan of release turned into a cry of discomfort and Santana immediately stopped what she was doing.

Once my orgasm stopped, I tried to force my body to relax but the pain was making it difficult for my muscles to want to unclench. I felt tears of pain and frustration sting my eyes and I brought my hand up to cover them. I didn't want Santana to see.

"Shit, Brittany," she said, her voice breaking. "I hurt you, didn't I?"

I kept my hand over my eyes but shook my head. It wasn't her fault, and I didn't want her to think that. But I was finding it harder to fight off my tears, and my mouth trembled as the pain worsened.

"I did," she said quietly. "Oh God, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry."

I could hear the tears in her voice as she wrapped her arms around me and buried her face into my chest, moving off of my body to try to relieve some of my pain.

"It's not your fault, San," I told her, my voice trembling. I fought off my tears, trying to comfort my wife who was distraught at the misplaced thought that she was the cause of my pain.

"Yes it is," she cried. "If I hadn't have touched you, you wouldn't be hurting."

"Tana, baby," I cooed, my voice still a little shaky but this time from hearing how hurt Santana was. "I was hurting before you touched me. I would be hurting even if you hadn't. It isn't your fault, I promise."

I brought my hands up to lift her face off of my chest, ignoring the twinges of pain. She looked at me with watery brown eyes.

"You weren't that bad until I started having sex with you, Britt," she stated disbelievingly.

"I needed to have sex with you. You're my wife and I needed you to touch me. It is my body's fault, not yours."

I looked at her pleadingly, hoping she would let go of the guilt that she didn't need to feel.

"Britt," she whispered, her eyes searching mine. I could see her starting to soften as she looked at me, letting herself give up some of the blame. I knew she wouldn't let it go completely, but I considered it a win when she leaned down and kissed me so softly.

"I love you," I breathed as she pulled back and looked deeply into my eyes.

"I love you," she said quietly and caressed my cheek. "I'm sorry."

I shook my head at her apology, brushing away the tear streaks off of her cheeks. "You have nothing to be sorry for."

I lifted my head to bring our lips back into contact. She kissed me back gently at first, but I quickly deepened the kiss. I wanted to make her feel good and forget her worries. I slid my hand down her side and started to slip it under the waistband of her pajama pants.

"No," Santana said, grabbing my hand and stopping me.

I frowned up at her. "But I want to make you come."

She shook her head, looking at me in disbelief. "I can't let you hurt yourself again just to get me off."

"It will be fine," I defended.

"I can't risk it," she stated, her tone of voice indicating that she would take no argument.

I huffed in exasperation, but I honestly knew that I was in too much pain at the moment and shouldn't even try to initiate any further sexual encounters right now.

"Fine."

Santana looked relieved at my agreement, and I was suddenly glad at my decision. I would do whatever I needed to in order to make Santana happy, and right now that meant doing as she asked.

"How about we take a nice warm bubble bath to try to soothe your joints?" Santana suggested.

That sounded nice, and it meant I could relax naked with her which I was never opposed to. I nodded and she grinned. She helped me out of bed and walked with me to the big tub in our bathroom. She started the water running and told me to wait while she let the dogs out quickly. She had been taking care of the animals more over the past few weeks as my pain worsened so I wouldn't have to do as much bending and walking around when I was stiff and sore.

I did as she requested and sat patiently on the edge of the tub. She returned only a few minutes later and added some bubble bath to the filling tub. She stripped out of her clothes to my delight, and I gazed upon her beautiful form unabashedly.

Santana smirked at me when she caught me looking at her in awe. The tub was full enough, so she turned the water off before turning back to me. She gently helped me remove my pajamas and underwear, being careful to move my limbs carefully to put as little strain on my joints as possible. I couldn't resist letting my hands roam a little as I used her hips to steady myself when I stood, and she clucked her tongue at me when I cupped her breasts.

"None of that babe," she admonished me. "Get in the tub."

I pouted playfully at her, but went along as she helped me into the bathtub. The hot water immediately seeped into my body and I could feel myself relax. Santana slid in beside me and guided me to lay back into her. I melted into her body, my head resting against her shoulder. She turned her head and kissed my forehead.

We sat in silence for several moments, enjoying being with each other like this. I felt how much she loved me and I absolutely understood how much she worried about me. But I had also been kind of keeping her from being the kind of support I knew she wanted to be. I kept arguing with her as to how bad I was even though she could see right through me.

I was pretty worried about everything because I had my suspicions as to what was going on. I was worried that I was right, but I didn't want to share my thoughts with Santana because I didn't want to upset her unnecessarily if I was wrong. So I kept it to myself and I had told her after I had made my appointment that I would be okay to go by myself.

I realized now that it was a shitty thing to do, and I would have been hurt had I been in her place. But Santana had just looked at me sadly and nodded.

"San?"

She hummed in her throat to acknowledge that she was listening.

"Would you go to the doctor with me on Monday?"

She held her breath behind me briefly. She reached up to move some hair behind my shoulder so she could see my face. I turned to look at her and saw the tentative hope in her eyes.

"Are you sure?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I am. I need you with me."

My heart melted as I saw the relief and love in her eyes. I hadn't realized how much tension Santana had been carrying this past week. Me keeping her at arm's length over all of this had been one of the worst things I could have done.

"Then nothing can keep me away," she promised.

Love surged through me and I brought my mouth to hers to kiss her so she could feel it, too. We kissed slowly as she held me in the tub, relaxing and letting the heat soothe my pain away.

My appointment was thankfully early Monday morning. We sat nervously in the waiting room and Santana held my hand lightly as we waited for my name to be called.

"Brittany Lopez."

Santana darted up quickly as my name was called. I had filled out paperwork to reflect my married name, and it gave me a thrill to hear it even if I couldn't jump up quite like Santana had done. I could see the nurse's eyes lock onto Santana, and I could tell she thought my wife was the patient. I would have to correct her once we headed to the room. Santana helped me up and we started walking toward the woman.

"Did you want your friend to accompany you back, Miss Lopez?" The woman was looking directly at Santana as she asked that, clearly indicating that she was asking Santana if I was allowed to go back with her.

Santana frowned and I almost chuckled at her consternation at the nurse's misunderstanding.

"Actually, I'm Brittany," I told the mistaken nurse. "Santana's my wife, and she will most definitely be coming back with me."

A look of understanding crossed the nurse's face followed by a quick look of disapproval before her professional mask came back down and she nodded. Santana stiffened beside me and I squeezed her hand to keep her silent as the nurse led us back to the back where she would get my weight and other vitals once we got to the exam room.

I explained the reason why I was there and gave her my medical history, including my myasthenia gravis diagnosis and my surgery years ago. She took my information disinterestedly and I immediately disliked the woman. I was relieved when she left.

"I swear, if the doctor is like her we are leaving," Santana told me, her voice strained with anger.

"Just relax, San," I told her calmly, although I did kind of agree with her. "I didn't like her either, but she isn't the doctor."

Santana clenched her jaw but nodded. She sat behind me on the exam table, running her hand up and down my back soothingly. She could easily tell that I was nervous and tense, and she was doing her best to try to comfort me. I knew that it helped relax her when she could have contact with me as well, so I leaned back into her hand a little.

The doctor was pleasant when she walked in. She was about ten years older than me and looked very nice.

"Good morning," she greeted with a polite smile, her dark blonde hair pulled back into a loose bun. She reached out to shake hands with me, and I was grateful that she barely squeezed my hand when she took it. "I'm Dr. Sullivan."

I smiled back at her. "I'm Brittany, and this is my wife Santana," I said.

She didn't even bat an eye as she smiled at Santana and shook her hand. "Nice to meet you."

Santana's shoulders relaxed as she shook the woman's hand and replied in kind.

"So what brings you here today?" Dr. Sullivan asked, seating herself on the little stool by the counter.

I explained the situation and Dr. Sullivan nodded knowingly. She asked about my myasthenia gravis and discussed my history with that. She asked when my symptoms started and when they got worse. She was incredibly thorough and knowledgeable. I definitely liked her. She stood up and washed her hands in preparation to examine me. Santana made a move to get off of the exam table, but Dr. Sullivan stopped her.

"You can stay where you are for now, Santana," she said with a smile. "I'm sure your wife would appreciate it."

Santana smiled and stayed where she was, her hand going right back to where it was on my back and rubbing soothing circles.

Dr. Sullivan started with my hands and moved my fingers and wrists before pressing on the joints to check for pain and inflammation. I definitely had quite a bit of pain, and Dr. Sullivan confirmed that she could feel that the joints were inflamed. She moved up my arms and checked my elbows and shoulders before going down to squeeze my feet and knees. I told her I had pain in my feet, but my knees were okay.

"Okay Santana, I'm going to need you to sit in the seat now. But you can hold onto Brittany's hand if you want."

Santana did as she was asked and I immediately reached my hand out to her so she could hold it. She pressed a kiss to it as she held it gently with both of her hands.

"How long have you been married?" Dr. Sullivan asked as I laid back so she could check the range of motion on my hips and palpate my abdomen.

"Three weeks," I answered, a smile spreading across my face.

"Newlyweds!" Dr. Sullivan exclaimed, her eyes sparkling as she grinned. "I remember those days with my husband."

Santana chuckled. "It feels like we've been newlyweds since we first started dating."

I turned my head to see her looking at me lovingly, and I knew I was looking at her in the same way.

"Okay, Brittany, you can sit back up," the doctor said and she helped me to sit up gently.

She listened to my heart and lungs and then surprised me by feeling the joint of my jawbone and checking the range of motion in my neck.

Dr. Sullivan made some notes in the chart. "You can move back onto the table if you want, Santana," she said knowingly as she wrote.

Santana quickly moved back up behind me and pressed a kiss to my shoulder as she resumed rubbing my back. Dr. Sullivan turned back to us with a gentle look.

"So I definitely feel some inflammation in a lot of your joints, even ones you haven't reported pain in. I think we need to run some bloodwork to check the normal stuff like white and red blood cell counts and all of that, but I also want to do some additional labs to check for things like rheumatoid arthritis or other inflammatory conditions."

I nodded knowingly, feeling my heart sink. Dr. Sullivan noticed my reaction and caught my eye to show me that she understood that I had been suspecting that. Santana was tense behind me, and I wished I could turn around and comfort her.

"I also want to get some x-rays of your hands and shoulders to check for any possible trauma that may be the cause of the pain you're experiencing," she continued. By the way she said this, I knew she wasn't expecting to see anything like that, but it was part of what she needed to do to get a diagnosis. She paused for a moment, looking at me with empathy. "I don't know if anyone's ever told you this, Brittany, but it is common that someone with one autoimmune disease to get diagnosed with another at some point in your life."

I shook my head. "I didn't know that," I told her quietly. I knew this was her way of telling me to expect a diagnosis I wouldn't be pleased with.

"So you think Brittany has another autoimmune disease?" Santana asked behind me.

"To be honest, that is what I suspect. But without any labs or x-rays, there is no way to confirm that yet. Not to mention that there are a variety of different autoimmune diseases that could cause the types of symptoms she is experiencing, so it is difficult to say what it could be. Once we get the results back then we can go from there and make a plan for referral to a specialist or be able to come up with a plan to treat the symptoms as needed."

My heart was sinking further and further with the news. It was what I had expected, but I had hoped I was wrong.

"In the meantime, I will prescribe you some painkillers to try to help manage the pain." I nodded and after I assured her I wasn't allergic to anything, she wrote a prescription for some strong pain medication. She set us up with the orders and told us she would call in a few days with the results. Santana waited patiently while they drew several tubes of blood from me and took me back for radiographs. Finally, we left the doctor's office defeated.

"How are you feeling?" Santana asked me when we got in the car.

I shrugged my shoulders and looked straight out of the windshield, not wanting to lie but not wanting to tell her how dejected I was feeling.

"Hey, look at me," she cooed softly. I turned my head and looked into her beautiful chocolate eyes. "It will be okay. Even if we don't get good news, I promise we will make it okay."

My chin trembled a little and I nodded, knowing that she would do whatever she could to make it okay, and I loved her all the more for it. She pulled me into her arms and held me tightly. I buried my nose into her neck and inhaled, her scent helping to center me.

"Since we both took the day off, what do you say we go get some ice cream?"

I chuckled. "It isn't even lunchtime yet," I murmured into her skin amusedly.

"So, we can have ice cream as a second breakfast," she said, and I could hear the smile in her voice.

"What, are you a hobbit or something? You need a second breakfast?" I asked teasingly.

She pulled back and looked at me in mock offense. "I am most definitely not a hobbit!" Santana protested. "But I knew a girl once that I could swear was a hobbit. She was a great singer though."

I giggled at the look of dismayed remembrance on her face. Clearly she wasn't a fan of this girl, even if she could respect her. "Well, regardless of if you're a hobbit or not, I guess we can get some ice cream."

Santana grinned at me and put the car in drive.

True to her word, Dr. Sullivan called a few days later. She caught me on my way home from work to let me know that my labs confirmed inflammatory response in my body and my rheumatoid factor was high. She said that it didn't confirm any specific diagnosis yet, but she needed to refer me to a rheumatologist to get a proper diagnosis. I got the information since she had already set up my appointment, which I was grateful for. I had known I wasn't going to get good news, but I still felt it like a blow to my gut.

I moved like I was on autopilot when I got home. I hated this. I had adjusted to living with my myasthenia gravis and was okay with it. Now I was going to have to deal with something else. What was wrong with me? Why did I have to have these things happen to me?

I sat down at the kitchen table after I had let the dogs out and just stared at the wall. I should have been starting dinner, but I couldn't motivate myself to do it. I felt completely worthless. Why would Santana even want to be with me when I couldn't be the type of woman she deserved? She put up with my issues before, but now I was adding even more to the table. I wasn't good enough for her.

I saw the wine rack that Santana had put into the kitchen when she moved in. I didn't even consciously realize that I had opened a bottle until I had poured myself a glass. I took a sip and grimaced at the taste of the red wine. I did not like it at all, but I took another sip anyways. I forced myself through the first glass, and by the time I started the second it didn't taste quite as bad to me.

After I finished the second glass, I didn't care about whether it tasted good or not. I felt my body buzzing and a pleasant warmth swirled through me. I knew my skin was probably flushed based on the heat I felt in my body, but it didn't even matter. I stood up after I had made it through half of the bottle to move to the fridge to pull out what I was going to make for dinner but I stumbled a little. I prevented my glass from spilling, but I slumped to the ground in front of the refrigerator and leaned against it. I officially was drunk.

"Hey babe," Santana called from the hall.

I hadn't even heard her get home. I started to feel the emotion I had been drowning with the wine bubble up at me now that my wife was here. Tears started to threaten, and I swallowed hard to try to fight them off.

"Britt? You in the kitchen?" Santana called again, her voice getting closer. I leaned my head back against the fridge in defeat as Santana walked into the kitchen. "Brittany?"

She looked almost panicked as she saw me on the floor. She took a quick step toward me before she saw the glass of wine at my side. She frowned and looked around before her eyes settled on the half empty bottle of wine on the table.

"Oh, Britt," she breathed, turning back to me. She moved swiftly to my side and knelt next to me. She moved the glass of wine out of my reach before she cupped my face. "What happened?"

I burst into tears at the loving concern on her face. I got out my news between tears, and she held me in her arms and rocked me as I spoke.

"I'm sorry I'm defective," I apologized on a sob.

Her arms tightened around me and she buried her face into my hair. "You are _not_ defective, you hear me? There is absolutely nothing about you that I would change except taking your pain away," she stated firmly.

"But I have all of these problems-" I began.

"No," Santana interrupted, pulling back to look into my eyes. "You are perfect to me, Brittany. I hate seeing you in pain, but regardless of whatever diagnosis you may have, I will still love you just as much as I did before and I will love you even more every day until the day I die. Nothing will make me think of you as anything less than my other half, so stop saying anything to make it seem like you aren't what I need."

I sobbed again, this time at the words of love my wife was saying. I knew that I couldn't live without her. I needed her to keep breathing, and I was so grateful that she wouldn't let me go.

She took me into her arms again and held me as my cries started to subside.

"I love you," I murmured once I calmed down.

"I love you, too," she replied. "Did you take your pill?"

I froze in realization, the knowledge that I forgot to take my pill when I got home sinking in through the haze of the wine. I pulled back and looked at her guiltily.

"Brittany," she scolded gently.

"Oops?"

She sighed and shook her head in frustration. "Come on, let's get you up."

Santana helped me to my feet and sat me down at the table. She got me my pill and a glass of water. I looked at the time and was able to make out that I was about an hour and a half late taking it. Oops, indeed.

Santana made me drink the whole glass of water while she made a quick dinner. She brought me another glass and I ate as much as I could so my wife wouldn't yell at me, knowing that I needed the food to soak up the alcohol I had consumed. Once I was done, she took me to the bedroom and tucked me in before settling in next to me. She pulled me into her so my head rested against her chest with her arm around me and I let my exhaustion from everything overtake me. I fell asleep with her fingers combing gently through my hair.

 **A/N: So they were at least able to enjoy their honeymoon and work around Brittany's pain and fatigue. And it definitely appears that something serious is going on with Brittany. Thankfully she realized she couldn't shut out Santana anymore regarding it. Just because she didn't want it to be real and pretended that everything was okay didn't mean it wasn't real and it was okay. Obviously having something for sure be wrong with her affected her quite badly though. Do you guys think she will adjust to whatever it is quickly? At least she has Santana in her corner. She needs that support.**

 **What do you guys think is wrong with Brittany? Any other thoughts about the chapter?**

 **Again, I have to apologize for not replying to reviews. For some reason, my reviews are not showing up at all on here so I can't respond. I am getting emails that you guys are reviewing, which is awesome! But when I log in they are not here! So I am hoping to get this figured out soon so I can talk to you all! I love that part!**


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Santana watched me much more closely after that. I had no plans of getting drunk again. It hadn't helped anything, and I had enough issues with not having control over what my body did that I didn't need to make it worse by getting drunk on top of it. I promised her it wouldn't happen again after she jokingly asked if she should lock all of the alcohol up in the house. I could tell that I had scared her though. And that thought made me feel worse about what I had done.

I could feel myself sinking into a depression, and Santana was trying to stay on top of it so I didn't let myself wallow. She kept contact with me throughout the day when we were at work, and when we were home she was practically always by my side. I didn't mind it most of the time, since I loved her and loved being with her, but it started to feel like she was babying me, which I didn't want or need. I didn't say anything though, since I felt like she deserved to do what she felt she needed to.

Most of the time she was able to keep me busy enough to keep my mind off of what was going on. Obviously she couldn't take my mind off of my pain, but she could distract me enough with activities or conversation that I didn't have time to think about my upcoming doctor visit and what it would mean. We went out most evenings, either to dinner or a movie or other things like that so I couldn't sit at home and sulk. We even went out to the park to walk on the path with the dogs a few times. I usually felt pretty good after those outings, and was grateful to Santana to be so thoughtful and caring to do these types of things.

The painkillers Dr. Sullivan had prescribed didn't help my pain really at all. I was able to make it through the day, but the pain was a constant presence. It felt almost like someone had injected liquid nitrogen directly into my joints with the feeling of pain and stiffness. Santana and I were both at a loss to what to do. Apart from heat and some light exercise when I felt okay enough to do it, we couldn't find much to help with the pain. Hot baths became a nearly nightly routine, and Santana always made sure to relax in the tub with me.

It was incredibly frustrating not to be able to touch her like I wanted to. I could see how sexually frustrated she was getting too. I wanted to touch her and she wanted to touch me, but it would just hurt me too bad to do really anything. I had tried to get Santana to sit on my face, but after the first time I winced when we tried it she refused to do it again. I convinced her to touch herself in front of me one night in the tub, and it was so freaking hot. I watched her fall apart as I caressed the insides of her thighs lightly, but after I ended up incredibly horny with no way to relieve the tension without pain we decided it probably wasn't a good idea to do that anymore.

So we were left doing nothing about it. I hated it and Santana hated it, but she was more concerned about my comfort than getting off. We had to settle for cuddles and kisses until I could saw the rheumatologist.

I was forced to tell Gus about what was going on since I needed him to help me pick up some of my slack at work. He was incredibly concerned about me and wished me well. I was truly grateful for him being my friend.

Santana made me call and tell my family about it as well. She knew I wouldn't really do it until it became necessary, but I knew she was right. My parents were both sad to hear that I wasn't well and wanted to be kept informed of what was going on. My sister was mad that I had to go through this, but told me I had her full support and she would do whatever I needed.

Santana informed Gabe. She asked me if it was okay, and I told her that it was absolutely fine. She needed someone she could talk to about everything, and I knew it would be hard for her to keep it from her brother. I knew Gabe would be a good source of comfort for her, and he turned out to be one for me as well. He showed up to visit a few times during the week and brought a cache of new movies for us to watch. He let me vent to him about how I felt in a way that I didn't want to put on Santana. He listened and offered advice when it was warranted, but he mostly just let me get all of my feelings out.

After two weeks we finally met with the rheumatologist. Dr. Burke was not a very personable man, but he was incredibly thorough and had no problem answering our many questions. He examined me and told me that he could feel bilateral inflammation in my joints. His exam was more thorough than Dr. Sullivan's, but he was the specialist so I wasn't surprised.

He explained to us that he did suspect an autoimmune disease and he wanted to run more labs to see if he could narrow it down to what was going on. He told us that he would have to rely on a variety of tests and the physical exam to make a diagnosis since there weren't really any definitive tests for most autoimmune diseases. I had been through it before with my myasthenia gravis, so I understood.

In the meantime, Dr. Burke said that he would start me on some oral steroids to help combat the inflammation and hopefully help relieve some of the pain. I wasn't thrilled to hear about the steroids, knowing the bad side effects they could cause. I hoped I didn't have to be on them long-term. He set up a follow up with me in a week when he would go over the test results and hopefully have a diagnosis and treatment plan. I had many more vials of blood drawn before we left.

I thought Santana was a little disappointed that we didn't have an answer after the first visit, but I understood that it wasn't usually how it worked. We filled my prescription and I took my first dose that evening with dinner.

I woke up the next morning feeling better than I had in months. I still had a little bit of pain, but it wasn't near the amount I had been dealing with recently. The steroids apparently were doing their job, which I was pleased about. I kissed Santana's cheek gently as I got out of bed to begin my morning routine. It was so nice to be able to move about more freely.

After I let the dogs out and fed all of the animals, I couldn't resist heading back into the bedroom to snuggle with my wife. I needed to start getting ready for work soon, but I felt so good that I wanted to let Santana know it. I climbed onto the bed and crawled on top of her, lowering myself down to her body as I peppered kisses over her face.

"Britt, what are you doing?" Santana asked sleepily.

"Kissing you," I murmured against her skin.

"If you don't start getting ready then you're gonna be late," she mumbled.

"Oh well." I went back to pressing kisses to her cheek, letting my lips linger between kisses.

I noticed Santana's breathing pick up and I felt a spark of desire as she opened her lust darkened eyes to look up at me.

"Don't tease me," she whined.

"I'm not," I husked.

Her eyes widened a little. "But your hands…"

"Feel pretty damn good," I finished for her.

"Yeah?"

I nodded and she smiled up at me, a lick of flame evident in her eyes. Then she pouted all of a sudden.

"We don't have nearly the amount of time I want in order to do anything before we have to leave for work," she stated sadly.

I sighed in frustration, knowing she was right. I settled my head down onto her chest and she wrapped her arms around me. "Tonight then, after work," I promised.

"God, I can't wait to touch you again," she moaned.

I lifted my head back up to bring out mouths together, kissing her deeply. We were startled out of our make-out session by Santana's alarm going off. I hadn't even showered yet and I needed to leave in like a half an hour. Looked like I wasn't going to have time to make anything for breakfast.

I hurried to get ready, Santana jumping in the shower right after I finished. I was amazingly ready on time and gave her a quick kiss and another promise of tonight's activities before I rushed out of the door. I had grabbed a banana and ate it on my way to work, making sure to take another dose of the steroids with the food.

Work was long and frustrating, only because I couldn't wait to get home. Gus noticed I was feeling better, but I explained to him that I still didn't know for sure what was going on. I hoped to have answers at the next appointment.

Finally, the work day was over. I picked up some Chinese food on the way home planning on eating it much later in the evening and waited for my wife to get home. She called me when she was on her way and I kept her on the line telling her all of the things I wanted to do to her until she told me she would wreck the car if I kept it up. I let her hang up and stood impatiently by the door to the garage.

Once she walked through the door I pounced. I grabbed her in a heated kiss and we made our way, stumbling, to the bedroom. We were pulling each other's clothes off and had to help each other keep from falling several times before we finally made it to the bed. I fell back onto the mattress while Santana removed my panties and then scooted back so she could crawl on top of me.

"I've missed this," she groaned hotly before proceeding to turn me into a quivering mess.

I had some slight twinges of pain, but I was able to easily ignore it since it was nothing near what I had been experiencing lately. Besides, the little bit of pain I was feeling was definitely worth the orgasms. Plural, for both of us.

We ended up eating our dinner a few hours later before settling back in bed for the night where we made love again. I woke up the next morning not feeling as good as the previous day. I was incredibly disappointed, and Santana was upset that I was in pain again and unhappy about it.

The fluctuation in my pain levels continued over the next week. Some days I was feeling almost normal, and others were almost like I was getting no treatment whatsoever. We were at least able to reestablish an intimate connection, but I could tell Santana was getting hurt by my grumpy attitude and quick temper on the days I woke up in pain again. I felt like such a shit, but every time I apologized she always told me not to worry about it. I promised to make it up to her once my pain was better controlled.

The week between appointments passed and we were back at Dr. Burke's office. He did another exam and checked the inflammation and pain levels in my joints. There was definitely still some inflammation and pain, which he confirmed on the exam. Then he took us into his office to discuss the test results and my case.

"Mrs. Lopez," he began. "I ran a full panel of tests to help give an idea of what the cause of your joint pain is. You have some abnormal results, mostly with your rheumatoid factor and your sedimentation rate which indicates inflammation. Based on your results and combined with the fact that you don't have any skin symptoms associated with diseases such as lupus or scleroderma, I could rule those diseases out. The fact that you have bilateral joint pain and inflammation and you have a positive result for the presence of an autoimmune response and rheumatoid factor, I believe that you have rheumatoid arthritis."

I nodded, both relieved and upset to finally have a diagnosis. I figured that was what it was, but to know for sure was kind of a blow. Santana was listening intently as the doctor continued, but turned to watch my reaction. I couldn't look at her because I knew I would break down, so I kept my eyes on the doctor.

"The good news is that you show minimal damage to your joints, so if we find a good treatment for you then you will likely not suffer from any malformation to the joints and will hopefully avoid any corrective surgery in the future. I have some information here on rheumatoid arthritis that I would like you to take home and read, and if you have any more questions then we can address them at your next appointment. I also want to give you some information on the medication I would like you to start on. It is a medication that is routinely used to treat this condition, but it comes with some serious side effects. Before starting you on this medication, you will need to have a chest x-ray and be tested for tuberculosis. This will also be necessary if we need to try you on a different medication if this one doesn't work, so it is best to do it and get a baseline."

I felt numb as he continued to explain all of the information I needed to know. These were some serious side effects for a drug, but if it was the best drug to use to prevent my pain and keep my joint damage from worsening, then I would do it.

Dr. Burke paused, looking between Santana and I seriously before he started talking again. "It is also extremely imperative that you not get pregnant while taking this medication, as it causes very serious deformities and complications to a fetus, and often leads to miscarriage."

My heart sunk and I bit the inside of my cheek to not cry. Santana grasped my hand and squeezed it gently, understanding that this was a blow to me. To both of us. We had discussed having kids and we had wanted me to carry first if my neurologist agreed I was healthy enough since I was older than Santana and would have higher risks due to my myasthenia gravis. We figured it would be easier to deal with that when we didn't already have another child to take care of. We weren't planning on getting pregnant right away, but we both wanted to do it in the near future. This just changed everything.

I tried to pay attention to everything else he was saying, but I knew I was starting to zone out a little. I hoped Santana was listening and that anything else he was saying would be in those pamphlets and papers he was handing to us.

"Do you have any questions today?" Dr. Burke asked.

"What happens if this medication doesn't work?" Santana asked him.

"There are a variety of other medications we can try, but if the methotrexate doesn't help then I would recommend trying a biologic. There are many biologics out there that are used to treat a variety of autoimmune diseases, and often, when methotrexate isn't enough, a combination of the two is successful," he explained.

Santana and I nodded in understanding. Santana looked to me to see if I had any more questions, but I honestly had information overload and couldn't think of anything. I shook my head at her and Dr. Burke led us out to the receptionist to get us set up for another appointment next week and to get the paperwork I needed for the testing I needed done.

I had more blood drawn, this time to check my liver values since apparently I would need those monitored while taking that medication. I was given orders to go get a chest x-ray in a different part of the building and then to get a skin test for tuberculosis. Santana followed me patiently to everywhere I needed to go, and she was quiet. She seemed to understand that I just needed her near me but I didn't want to talk while we were still at the doctor's building.

When we got out to the car, I finally spoke.

"Well, this sucks."

Santana look at me in pity, the hurt she felt at our situation clear in her eyes. "Are you okay? I mean, obviously you aren't, but… I guess I want to know what you think."

I sighed, leaning my head back against the head rest and rolling it to the side to look at her. "I'm frustrated. This all sounds more serious than I even realized it would be. I mean, we both looked at those pamphlets when we were waiting for my x-rays. They were talking about complications such as heart problems and permanent joint damage, not to mention all of the side effects from the medication. This just fucking sucks."

"I know, sweetie," Santana cooed softly, taking my hand between hers and pulling it to her lips for a kiss. She kissed the back of my hand before turning it over and kissing the palm. She wrapped both of her hands around it when she removed her lips as if to keep her kisses in place. "It's really scary. I never thought there would be so many things to worry about when you were just having joint pain. I hate that this is happening to you."

I could hear the tears start to creep into her voice, so I leaned over to wrap my free hand behind her neck and pull her into me. "Hey, it's going to be okay," I told her. "I've dealt with this kind of stuff before and I'm still here. We'll get something figured out."

Santana nodded her head against my shoulder, releasing the hand she held so she could wrap her arms around me. "I just wish that it would be me and not you," she murmured.

"No," I said vehemently. "Don't wish that. I couldn't stand having anything like this happen to you. I can handle it if it is myself, but never you."

"Then you know how I feel knowing that you have to go through this," she argued.

I pulled back to look at her, seeing her frustration and anger and hurt. "I do know. But it's already happened, and to wish that you had it instead… I just don't even want to risk the universe taking that as an invitation to do something to you. I can't handle that," I said truthfully.

Santana let out a breath, turning her head to look out the windshield. "Do you think you want to do that medication?"

Her question was timid, and I understood why. "I don't know. I mean, it would be great to get relief from the pain and everything, but the side effects..." I paused and sighed again. "What do you think?"

She looked at me again sadly. "The side effects are scary, but he will monitor you for that stuff and if anything starts to change then he can get you on something else. I think that, if it will give you the best chance to treat the disease, then it is what you should do."

I knew what she was saying to me. I probably would have done the same in her place. She didn't want to see me in pain anymore, and if that meant our plans were changed or postponed then that was what needed to be done. I knew that she was probably right. I needed to try this medication. The pros of taking it far outweighed the cons.

I nodded in agreement, turning away from her to look out the windshield. She took my hand in hers again and I squeezed it reassuringly, letting her know that I would be okay. We sat there for a few moments more before she started the car and drove us home.

I was having a little trouble dealing with the news over the next few days. I had noticed that I was starting to show signs of being on the steroids, as my face was getting rounder and I had actually started to put on a few pounds. That only made me feel worse. I knew that I was going to be on the steroids for awhile, since they couldn't just stop them abruptly, so it was only going to get worse before it got better.

Santana was sadder as well. I knew she was talking to Gabe a lot about everything, and she was doing her best to keep me from spiraling while keeping herself going. I don't know what Gabe said to her, but it was only a few days after my diagnosis when she came home from work telling me that she signed us up at a facility that had a pool so we could go swimming a few days a week.

"I know that swimming in Tahiti seemed to help your joints, and the research I've done says that minimal impact exercise is good for your joints," she explained. "It helps to keep them from stiffening up, which is what happens if you are still for long periods. Plus, this place has a hot tub so the heat will help too."

"When are we going to do this, San?" I asked, a little exasperated. I was in a bad mood since my pain was worse today, and I immediately regretted my tone of voice when I saw Santana's hurt expression.

"I just figured we could do it one day on the weekend and then a couple of weeknights," she said quietly. "And we could maybe go out to dinner or something those nights to make it relaxing. I talked to my bosses and they told me I could alter my schedule a bit so I could be home earlier the days you wanted to go."

She sounded so timid, as if she was second guessing her idea. I hated that I made her feel that way. This stupid disease was making me be a bitch to my wife due to my pain and difficulty dealing with it. The lack of sleep I got at night due to not being able to get comfortable was giving me an even shorter temper. Santana had put so much thought into this and had even talked to her work about rearranging things so she could go with me. She was doing so much to try to help me, and I was being ungrateful. I closed my eyes in shame.

"I'm so sorry I'm being such a bitch, San," I said sincerely. I opened my eyes and looked back at her, seeing her shake her head a little with an expression as if she wanted to argue. "I really am thankful for everything you are doing and everything you've done for me. You are so amazing. You know I love you, right?"

I had tears pooling in my eyes and Santana's eyes were watery as she nodded. "I know, Britt," she answered. "I know you do. And I love you. I just feel so helpless sometimes."

"Baby, don't," I told her softly, cupping her cheek as tears threatened to spill over. "You are doing so much, and there isn't really anything else you can do. Everything you are doing is perfect. And I think the pool idea is really good. The swimming did help in Tahiti, so it would be good to try it. Plus, I could use the exercise with all of the weight I've been putting on with the steroids."

I meant the last sentence as a joke, but it came out more depressed sounding than I had intended. I had become much more comfortable with my body after being with Santana. The changes I had undergone due to my myasthenia gravis and inability to exercise like I used to had become a non-concern with as much as Santana told me I was beautiful and sexy. But the changes the steroids were causing were making me have new body issues.

"Britt, you haven't been putting on weight," Santana said, frowning.

"Yeah, I have," I argued. "My face is getting fatter and my pants are tighter already."

I tried to act as if it didn't bother me that much, but Santana saw right through me.

"Babe, if you have been putting on weight, it isn't much. I haven't even noticed," she told me, looking at me honestly. "You are still so beautiful. And even if you put on fifty pounds, I wouldn't care. You would still be the sexiest woman I've ever seen and I would love you."

"What if I put on a hundred?" I asked jokingly.

"Then I would love you even more, because there would be more of you to love," she replied playfully, giving me a peck.

I could see the honesty in her eyes. The stress I had felt about that started to slip away. I knew I would still have some issues with it, but I knew Santana would still love me no matter what. She hadn't shied away from my scar or my imperfect body before, and she promised never to do it. Deep in my heart, I knew it was true.

So I did my best to push my irritation down and not take my issues out on Santana, and things went well. My labs looked good and my tuberculosis test was negative, so Dr. Burke started me out on the medication. I took it on a Saturday night since I was told it could make me nauseated, and I was glad I did. I felt so sick that night and into the next morning. Santana decided that we should have a lazy Sunday and we spent the day lounging around in bed, watching movies while I became accustomed to the unwelcome side effect.

Over the next couple of weeks Santana and I went and did some swimming and even took advantage of the hot tub to help soothe my joints. It honestly did help, and I thanked her profusely for the great idea. We either went out to dinner or picked something up on those nights, and the extra sort of date nights were a nice way for us to connect without concentrating on my illness.

A few weeks after I started my medication I was feeling significantly better. I was still dealing with the nausea, so our usual big Sunday breakfasts stopped, but it was worth it for how good I was feeling. Dr. Burke decided to start weaning me off of the steroid since my inflammation had reduced and my pain was practically non-existent. I was overjoyed, and Santana was thrilled that something finally seemed to be working for me.

Unfortunately, once I went off of the steroids, the pain started to return. At first it was just some minor twinges here and there, and I attributed those to bad days. But the pain kept getting worse and my sleepless nights returned along with my grumpy attitude. I hoped that it would start to get better, but it didn't. And that's when things started to go downhill.

I was withdrawing more into myself again, and I spent most of my time when I was at home curled up on the couch or in bed watching TV or movies. Santana was picking up a lot of the slack at home, doing most of the chores and cooking that I had neglected to do. She was trying to get me to cheer up and be more upbeat, but I wasn't responding well.

"Britt, can you please put your clothes away?" Santana asked me. She wasn't being mean about it, but I felt my anger rising.

"I fucking hurt all over, so no," I snapped.

"Fine," Santana muttered under her breath, hurt and anger flashing in her eyes. "I'll just do it myself."

"Don't be a bitch," I said, raising my voice to her.

"I'm being a bitch?" Santana asked incredulously, dropping the laundry basket full of folded clothes onto the bed I was currently lying on.

"Yeah, you are," I muttered. "If you cared that I was in pain then you wouldn't be saying this shit to me. You would just shut up and leave me alone."

Santana looked like I had punched her in the stomach. Her face paled and her eyes shimmered with unshed tears. "I do care," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I hate that you are hurting, and I want nothing more than for you to feel better. I am trying here, Brittany. I am trying so hard to be what you need but I don't know what to do anymore."

My heart started to pound in fear, my anger fading rapidly. "What are you saying?" I asked shakily.

"I'm saying that I can't handle you yelling at me anymore. I get that you hurt, but I can't do this," she said, her tears threatening to fall. "I am gonna go."

Santana turned to walk out of the room. "Wait! Please San, don't! I need you," I pleaded, sitting up on the bed.

Santana paused by the doorway and turned to look back at me. "I can't…"

She sobbed and walked out of the room.

"Santana!" I cried after her, hurrying to follow. I wasn't fast enough. I opened the door to the garage as she was backing out, but she didn't stop. I sank to my knees and sobbed.

I was so fucked up. I had ran Santana off by being so mean to her. She had done nothing but support me and I didn't even care. I knew that I really did care, but I had let my bad feelings overwhelm me and it had ruined everything.

I needed to fix this. I hurried back into the house and found my phone. I tried calling Santana but she wouldn't pick up. After calling her five times and having her reject my calls, I resorted to texting. I begged her to come home. I told her I was sorry. I told her I was an idiot and I didn't mean anything I said. I told her I loved her.

I didn't receive a response. I curled on my bed and the dogs cuddled up to me, knowing I needed them.

 **A/N: First of all, I need to say that I am so sorry for not posting as usual on Wednesday! I have had a terrible week at work and I have been so stressed, tired, and sore that when I've gotten home all I've wanted to do is take some take to myself. So I apologize again for not having the energy to update!**

 **Having said that, it looks like Brittany has had a seriously rough time trying to adjust to her diagnosis and dealing with her pain. It may be especially bad since she was getting better before it got worse. Living with chronic pain takes a serious toll, and Brittany hasn't learned to live with it yet. Add depression on top of that and it just makes things that much worse.**

 **What do you think is going to happen? How do you guys think Santana is feeling with all of this? What do you think of her diagnosis? And what about the issue of pregnancy? Any other thoughts? There is a lot of drama going on, and they are having a lot to deal with right after getting married. Do you think it will make them stronger or pull them apart?**

 **So you guys are probably more familiar with rheumatoid arthritis than myasthenia gravis, but if you have any questions I can do my best to answer them! Poor Brittany has to suffer a lot, but unfortunately this is the case with so many other people in the world that have autoimmune diseases. Most people wouldn't be able to tell she had anything wrong with her, but she is dealing with so much!**

 **Anyways, thank you guys all so much for your reviews! The good news is that they are showing up now, so I can reply to them! I will also try to not let myself get too overworked to not be posting again, too.**


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

It wasn't until forty minutes later that Santana texted me back.

 _I'm at Gabe's. I need some time to think. I promise I will be home later- Santana_

Relief washed over me. She was okay and she was coming back. I would grovel at her feet then to fix this.

 _Okay. I love you- Brittany_

 _I love you too- Santana_

I promised myself that I would do whatever it took to make things right. I got my laptop and started doing some research. I looked up a lot more information about rheumatoid arthritis to get a better grasp on the things I was going through and what the next step may be. I knew I needed to call Dr. Burke again since my pain was back. Obviously the medication wasn't working, so we needed to move onto a different treatment plan. I researched what would be the next best step.

Then I started looking up some other things. I knew that my temper and my lack of interest in things weren't normal. I needed to do something about that before things continued to get worse and I drove my wife away for good. After some surfing around, I had a pretty good idea what I needed to do.

I decided it was best that I did some things around the house while I waited for Santana to come back. It wasn't good for me to sit and wallow, and she had been doing so much lately that I knew I needed to do more than I was. I put my clothes away like she had asked, and I picked up the clutter around the house that I knew I had been the biggest cause of. I was moving slowly due to my joints, but I was moving and that was the important thing.

I was starting to prepare things for dinner when Santana walked in.

"Hi," I greeted her softly and a little unsurely.

"Hey," she replied, her voice a little guarded.

"I am so sorry," I told her earnestly. "I have absolutely no excuse, and I promise to work on the way I've been behaving."

Santana didn't say anything and stood at the edge of the kitchen with her eyes on the floor.

I took a step toward her, hesitant that she wouldn't want me to get too close. "I've been doing some thinking," I began.

"Me too," Santana said. She looked up at me then, her face set. "I think you should get some help. I've been trying to get you through this, but I'm obviously not enough." She took a breath, letting it out in a sigh. "I think you should see a counselor or something. Someone who is better equipped to get you through the emotional problems that your disease is causing."

I could feel my mouth starting to turn up into a smile at how amazingly smart my beautiful wife was. Santana gave me a strange look, obviously not expecting my reaction to be a positive one, much less a smile.

"I agree," I told her. "I spent the time you were gone looking up counselors in the area who specialize in these things, and even some support groups. I realized that how I was acting was really out of line, and I haven't been able to deal with my diagnosis and my pain the way I hoped I would."

I took another step toward her, noticing that she was softening toward me now that she realized that I wasn't going to snap at her again. "You have been so great, San," I said honestly. "You have actually been amazing. I couldn't have asked for anyone better to be with me, and I've taken you for granted and treated you like shit. And I am so, so incredibly sorry."

My voice broke as my emotions overwhelmed me. Santana closed the distance between us and took me in her arms.

"I know, Britt. I know," she soothed softly in my ear. "I know you didn't mean any of it."

"I didn't," I promised. "But I know it still hurt you, and I hate that I made you feel like that."

Santana was silent for a moment as she held me, her hands stilling on my back where they had been running up and down gently. "It did hurt," she said truthfully. "I never thought I'd hear you say things like that to me."

"I never thought I would say those things," I whispered. "That's when I really realized I needed to get help."

Santana pulled back to look at me. "I'm really proud of you for doing this. And I am so proud of how strong you are. I know how much pain you have to deal with every day. And I promise that I will continue to do whatever I can to make things easier for you."

I nodded gratefully. "I promise to help out more, too. I've been making you do everything, which isn't right."

Santana shook her head at me. "I can handle it, babe. I don't want you to do things when you're hurting."

"No, Tana," I objected. "I need to do more. It isn't good for me to sit around and do nothing. Not only does it make my joints worse, but it makes my attitude worse. I love that you help me, and the only thing I ask is that you will continue to do so if I need you to. But don't take everything on yourself, okay?"

"Okay," she said, nodding.

"I need to call Dr. Burke Monday and let him know that the medication isn't working," I said.

"Yeah," she agreed softly. "What do you think is going to happen?"

I shrugged, stepping back from her to continue prepping the dinner I had been neglecting. "I'm not really sure. I looked up some things that may be what he recommends we try next, but I really don't want to keep trying medication after medication before we get to the big guns."

Santana leaned against the counter next to me while I cut up some chicken. "Okay. So you want to go for the more potent meds then?"

I nodded. "I think that is probably the best thing for me, but I want to see what he says first."

Santana agreed. The rest of the evening we spent talking about what we could expect at the doctor and with me getting counseling. Santana offered to go to the counselor with me, but I told her that I appreciated the thought, but the issues I was having weren't related to her so I didn't need her to go. I needed to talk to someone about what I was feeling about my health problems without Santana worrying about me anymore than she already did.

We slowly eased back into our normal interactions, and I made sure to show Santana however I knew how much I loved her and how sorry I was. Santana took me out to the pool the next day and I was feeling a lot better after the exercise and the hot tub.

Dr. Burke told me to restart my oral steroids and I would just see him at my normal appointment scheduled a month from now. I had done well on a combination of the two medications, so I agreed. I started feeling relief shortly after I started the steroids again, and my mood drastically improved. It didn't mean that I didn't still need to talk to a counselor.

I scheduled an appointment for a highly recommended counselor that dealt with a variety of mood disorders, including anxiety and depression. She was very pleasant. Almost too cheerful for me, actually, but I gave her a shot. And that turned out to be the best thing I could have done.

Diane, as she asked me to call her, was incredibly knowledgeable and it felt like she was reading my mind when I told her about what was going on. We discussed the way I had been feeling after my diagnosis and how the pain and fatigue had been constantly wearing me down. She gave me coping mechanisms to deal with helping myself calm down when I was getting too frustrated with it since I still didn't have a good treatment plan for my arthritis yet.

The best thing she helped me with was understanding that I needed to not let my diagnosis get me down. There was nothing I could do to change it, so I needed to learn to adjust to living with it. I had done it once before after my myasthenia gravis diagnosis, but for some reason this one was hitting me harder. We talked at length about why I felt like it was worse, and I came to the realization that there were many factors making me think that way. From having the feeling like things couldn't go right for me, to having it feel like something bad always had to follow something good, to the biggest pain of feeling like I wasn't ever going to be good enough, especially if my body couldn't do the things I wanted such as have babies.

Diane really helped me work through my issues and I was doing so much better after meeting with her for several sessions. Santana and I both noticed my improvement, and it helped our relationship significantly. Santana was still my rock, and I relied on her more than ever. I confided my fears and my revelations with her after my sessions, and she provided loving advice and support.

Dr. Burke decided to start me on a biologic drug since the pills didn't work on their own. I was relieved that he suggested that since it was the decision I would have wanted him to make. There were additional serious side effects, but the risks were worth it. I couldn't live like that anymore, and my body needed relief. It was an injection that I needed to give myself every two weeks. And I did have to give it to myself, because Santana couldn't stand the thought of poking me with a needle. It was hard enough to do it to myself, so I understood that it would have been harder to do it to Santana if the situation was reversed.

After a couple of months doing well on the new medication, I was weaned off of the steroids once again. I was a little nervous about stopping that extra little bit of help, but I knew I needed to get off of them. Once I finally stopped taking them, I was relieved to find that I was doing really well. I still had good days and bad days, but the good days far outnumbered the bad, and the bad days were honestly not even very bad. I was able to easily continue my normal routine with only minor pain, which got even better over time.

Santana and I continued our trips to the pool. The exercise was good to keep my joints in shape. I also needed to keep up my activity since I had put on more weight due to going back on the steroids. I had gained nearly ten pounds, which stressed me out. Santana reassured me that she found me as beautiful as ever, and she made love to me as often as possible to show me that. I felt it when she looked at me and touched me, but when I looked into the mirror I couldn't help but see the extra weight and frowned when I had to buy bigger pants.

It wasn't easy to try to lose the weight. Santana knew I was self-conscious about it, and she did her best to make me feel good. She automatically started eating healthier with me, knowing that it would help me, and she helped me come up with good exercises to do since I wasn't able to swim for super long periods of time. She would have been perfectly happy with me the way I was, but she knew I was determined to lose the weight I had put on so she was supportive. I was so happy when the roundness in my face disappeared, but it was still taking time to get the weight off of my middle. I knew it wouldn't be easy, but I wasn't going to give up.

After awhile, I knew I needed to have a talk with Santana. Diane had been pestering me about sharing my biggest concern with Santana. I had been delaying it because I honestly didn't want to think about it. But I understood that it had to happen.

Fall was upon us and we had been married for six months. We were snuggled up in bed naked after having some spectacular sex.

"You are so good at that," Santana said, still a little breathless as she curled into my side. Her head was resting on my chest as we were bundled under the covers and I was running my fingers through her hair as I loved to do.

"Not as good as you," I replied, referring to the amazing things she could do with her tongue that I hadn't seemed to have mastered quite yet.

She chuckled. "Well, I have been doing it for longer, but I'm sure you will catch up someday," she teased.

"Whatever," I huffed, pushing her shoulder playfully.

Santana giggled and burrowed further into me, wrapping her arms tighter around my waist. She turned her head to press a light kiss just under my collarbone, causing goosebumps to spread over my body. She was so relaxed and I hated to ruin that, but I needed to get it out before I chickened out again.

"Hey, baby," I began.

Santana hummed, letting me know she was listening.

"I need to talk to you about something."

Santana lifted her head to look at me, hearing my serious tone. She bit her lip nervously, and I could see the apprehension in her eyes.

"Okay," she said hesitantly. "What's going on, Britt?"

"You know what we discussed me having a baby first when we decided to have kids and all?" I asked, my heart thudding with nerves.

Santana's brow furrowed a little, clearly not understanding what was going on. "Yeah."

"Well, I don't think it's a good idea for me to have a baby," I said sadly.

Santana frowned. "I know it isn't a good idea right now, babe. With you being on the medications and everything, and just getting in a good place and all, I definitely don't think you should get pregnant yet."

My heart hurt as I realized I was going to have to crush Santana's dream as well as mine. I tucked her hair behind her ear before I cupped her cheek, holding my eyes on hers with an apologetic gaze. "No Santana. I mean I don't think I should have a baby ever."

Santana sat up suddenly, her face an unreadable mask. I could see pain in her eyes, but she was doing her best to hide it. "I don't understand," she said quietly. "I thought you wanted to have a baby with me."

"Oh, baby, I do," I cooed, sitting up myself and taking her hands in mine. "I would love nothing more than to carry our baby, but there are just too many risks."

I let out a frustrated sigh and Santana looked at me as if she was so lost. "There are just too many things that could go wrong. Not only with the medications I am on causing issues and me needing to stop the one before I could even get pregnant, but the fact that I could have serious complications with my myasthenia gravis on top of it. And there is the chance that any child I gave birth to would have health problems like me, and I just don't think I could do that to our baby, San."

I was fighting not to cry. I had thought about this for awhile, and had cried about it at sessions with Diane, but it was still hard. Santana looked as if she was going to start crying too but was biting her cheek to keep it in.

"But you know that there's a chance that things could go wrong even if I carried or even if we adopted," Santana said, her voice trembling.

"I know there are always risks, but there are just so many more if I were to carry. And I can't bear the thought of being the reason of risk to the health of our baby. Plus, the thought of something serious happening to me on top of it is just that much more scary," I said honestly, hating myself a little for being scared for myself.

That seemed to hit Santana like a ton of bricks. She was silent for several long moments and I could practically see the fear of every possible worst case scenario cross her mind. I could see how scared it made her. "I don't think I could handle either of those things," she confessed. "I have to admit that I would love to see you carry our baby, but if it meant any serious danger to our child or you, then I have to agree with your decision."

"I'm so sorry," I apologized shakily, seeing the hurt she was trying to hide.

"Oh, sweetie, don't be sorry," she said as she cupped my cheek. Her voice was thick with emotion. "It isn't your fault. I love you. Even though it does make me sad, I would much rather not have anything happen to you. And the thought of you being sad at having to give up something I knew you wanted so badly makes me even more sad. But I can always carry at some point too like we were planning on."

I nodded, the thought of a pregnant Santana helping to ease my sadness. As hard as it was to let go of my dream of giving birth, I knew it was the best thing to do.

"Have you talked to your doctors about it?" Santana asked.

"Yeah," I replied. "They all told me that pregnancy was possible but it would be high risk. And I would have to consult with so many specialists and they all seemed to think that it would be best not to get pregnant if it was an option not to."

"Okay," Santana said quietly. "And are you sure you're okay with this?"

I let out a breath. "It's hard, San," I confessed. "But I have talked a lot about it with Diane and I think that it is the best decision for me. And hopefully for us."

Santana took in a deep breath before letting it out slowly, puffing her cheeks as she did so. "Okay," she said again.

"Are you sure you're okay with it?" I asked carefully.

"Yeah," she said honestly. "I mean, your doctors all seem to think it is best, and you know what is best for you and your body, so I am 100% behind you."

I gave her a small smile, grateful that she understood. "Thank you. I love you."

"I love you, too," she replied, pulling me into a tight hug.

I buried my face in the crook of her neck, inhaling her scent and letting it calm me. I trailed my fingers lightly over her bare sides making her squirm and pull back a little from me.

"Babe, that tickles," she admonished.

I pouted playfully. "Awww, honey bunches of oats, what's wrong? Can't take a little teasing?"

Her eyes rolled. "You did not just call me that," she laughed. "You're such a dork."

I shrugged my shoulders with a smile. "But you love me anyway," I stated.

"That I do," she answered, leaning in for a kiss.

I smiled into it, bringing my fingers back up to tickle her sides. Santana squealed and squirmed away and I giggled.

"Fuck no, Britt! You are so gonna pay for that!"

I laughed harder as she pushed my hands away from her before poking my ribs, making me buck away from her relentless fingers. I became breathless as my laughs became almost manic while she continued to tickle me. I tried rolling away from her only to have her straddle my hips to hold me in place.

"St- stop!" I gasped out between giggles. "I.. can't breathe."

Santana immediately stopped her assault on my sides, her delighted grin and laughter fading slightly as she became concerned. "You okay?"

I nodded, still laughing a little as I tried to calm down. Thankfully her smile grew a little wider as she saw I was telling the truth, and her eyes softened as she looked down at me.

"You are so amazingly beautiful," she said softly, her eyes searching my face.

My heart skipped a beat, even as I averted my gaze bashfully. "I'm sure I look so beautiful with my face all red and sweaty," I joked.

"You do," Santana said adamantly. "You are beautiful all of the time. But I do have to say that I have a particular fondness when you're underneath me and your face is all red."

A jolt of arousal hit me at the husky tone her voice got when she told me that. "Is that so?" I asked, my voice low with desire as I put my hands on her thighs and used my thumbs to rub light circles on the insides. Santana shivered a little and leaned down, placing her hands on either side of my head to lay over me.

"Oh yeah," she husked. "Especially when you are biting your lip as you moan."

Santana traced her tongue along my lower lip to emphasize her words. I parted my lips to let my tongue meet hers and we kissed so deeply. Santana ground her hips down onto me, letting me feel her wetness. I couldn't take it anymore, so I slid my right hand from its place on her thigh to her folds, finding her clit right away to rub it gently.

"Mmmm, fuck," Santana moaned as she broke our kiss. Her mouth latched onto my neck and began to suck as I played with her clit.

She suddenly sat up and pulled my hand away from her, shaking her head at me.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"No distracting me," she commanded. "I want to see how beautiful you get when you come."

I bit my lip as my wetness grew and I could feel my blush rising. Santana smirked at me, then took both of my hands and put them up by my head, instructing me not to move them. Then she proceeded to make me feel as beautiful as she said I was.

I had expected things to maybe be a little strained between us after the discussion about kids. But Santana was just as loving as ever. She continued to give me loving goodbye kisses in the morning and hugs when she got home from work. She still cuddled with me every night and gave me those special little looks when she thought I wasn't paying attention. My stress of the decision faded away and life was better than it had been in quite awhile.

It was a couple weeks later when Santana surprised me. It was nearing Thanksgiving, and we had made plans to have dinner at our house with my parents and Gabe. Bonnie, Adam, and Chase couldn't make it in this year, which was kind of sad since Bonnie had told everyone last week that she was pregnant again. I would have loved to see my sister to congratulate her in person, but I understood that the timing didn't work out this year.

Santana and I had just finished discussing what we needed to get from the store for the dinner. I got up from the couch to take the list I had made back into the kitchen when she grabbed my wrist and pulled me back down. I landed partly on top of her, and she smiled as she leaned back and pulled me so I was laying with my back on her front. She parted her legs so I slipped down between them and settled into the v of her thighs. I sighed in content as she wrapped her arms around my waist, and I put my hands over hers to hold them in place.

"You're in a cuddling mood tonight," I said playfully.

Santana kissed the top of my head before speaking into my hair. "I always want to cuddle with you," she answered. "But I also want to tell you something."

"Okay," I prompted when she paused.

"I think we should have a baby," she whispered.

I started in surprise, my eyes widening and my heart starting to beat a little faster. "What? Like a real baby?" I choked out.

Santana chuckled behind me. "Yes, Brittany. A real baby."

"Now?" I squeaked.

"Well, yeah," she said timidly.

I moved to sit up and Santana let me. I turned to look at her and she was looking back at my shocked face bashfully. She was biting her lip nervously and she started to play with her fingers in her lap which I knew she did when she was really nervous.

"San," I breathed, astonished. "Why now?"

Santana met my eyes imploringly. "It's just that, I've learned that life is too short to wait on things that you want. Anything can happen at any moment. We've lost loved ones too soon, and our health can change at any moment."

She paused, letting me take her words in. She was right. Santana lost most of her family and I lost Sam unexpectedly so young. Anything could happen with my health if my history was anything to go by.

"I don't want to wait anymore, Britt," Santana continued. "I want to start a family with you before something else goes wrong. I want to raise babies with you and I don't see why it shouldn't be now."

I felt a fluttering in my chest. I wanted to have a family with Santana so badly. I understood why she wanted to do it now, but I was worried that she was jumping into things out of fear.

"I want to have babies with you, too," I said softly, looking at her with love. "But with all of my health issues right now, are you sure that it is the best time?"

Santana sat up on her knees and took my hand in hers. "I get that you're worried, but are we any more sure that you will be healthier in a year? Two years? Five years? Right now you are doing well. Your counseling sessions are going great, and you have minimal weakness and pain. Our relationship is strong, and we both want to have a family together. I don't know of a better time to try than now."

I studied her for a moment, seeing the pleading sincerity in her eyes. She really wanted this. She wanted to have a baby for us so our family could grow as we had both dreamed of. It wasn't necessarily the way we had pictured it to start with, but one thing I had learned over my life was that things don't always go according to plan. And that it sometimes leads to the best things in life. If I had kept my life according to the plan I had laid out, I never would have met Santana, and she was the best thing that ever happened to me.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that Santana was right. There was no particular best time to have a baby, but we most definitely couldn't predict how things would be in the future. Things were going well right now, so why risk something else going wrong before we were able to start our family?

"Okay," I said softly.

Santana's eyes widened a little. The corners of my mouth started to turn up as she looked at me in disbelief. "Really?"

My smile widened, and I gave a happy laugh. "Really, Tana. Let's have a baby. I want to have a baby with you."

"Oh my God!" Santana exclaimed, darting forward to wrap her arms around my neck tightly. I put my arms around her waist and held her back. "I am so happy you said yes. I can't believe you said yes!"

"How could I say no to you?" I asked, only half joking.

I pulled back from the hug to look at her happy face. She smiled at me so lovingly, and I knew that I would never regret this decision.

"We're going to have a baby, Brittany," she said in awe.

"We are," I confirmed. "Now all we need to do is find a donor."

Santana laughed a little. "Oh geez. I never thought I'd be shopping for a good man to get knocked up with his sperm."

I giggled. "Well, you know I would do the honors if I could, but I just don't have the right equipment."

"And I am incredibly grateful that you don't," Santana said, giving me a peck.

I sighed happily as her lips met mine and I leaned back onto the couch, pulling her on top of me. Santana settled onto my body, her head on my chest, and I let my hands caress her back, occasionally twirling the ends of her hair around my fingers because I couldn't resist it. I pictured a little girl with hair like Santana's or a little boy with her dimples and I grinned. I couldn't wait.

 **A/N: So everything worked out and Brittany realized that she needed treatment for her depression. Even though it took her being an utter bitch and the fear of losing Santana for it to sink in (though Santana was absolutely in no way ever going to leave her). So now she is getting the help she needs physically and emotionally and things are back on track. Santana can continue to be the proper support Brittany needs and Brittany can be what Santana needs.**

 **Even though there wassadness with them deciding that Brittany shouldn't have a baby, they are getting through things stronger than ever. And they are going to plan for Santana to get pregnant now! Yay!**

 **Do you guys think they made the best decision about Brittany not carrying a child? Do you think they are moving too fast in planning for a baby now? Any other thoughts? I appreciate you guys reviewing and favoriting! You're awesome! I truly never thought this story would get the response it has, so it means so much to me. And as we are getting close to the end of it, I just wanted to let you all know again how amazing you are for reading this and liking it!**


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: Sorry for making you have to get through this note to get to the chapter, but there were a few things I wanted to address before you guys get to reading if that's okay. First, I am amazed that the response for them deciding to have a baby already was overwhelmingly positive. To be honest (and you may find this weird, since I wrote this story and all), I think they are moving a little fast with it. BUT, as Santana said, they both have experienced so much loss in life and there is no guarantee that Brittany would even be able to hold a baby in 2 years, much less longer than that. So it just really does make sense for them to not want to wait to start a family. They want to experience all of the amazing things they can together just in case. And, honestly, anything can happen in life to anyone at any time, so why not go for your dreams? Also, I didn't want to drag the story out so the baby thing may have been a little sooner than I wanted it originally, but it just fits for them anyways.**

 **The second thing I want to talk about is that I have had several people mention that they should use Brittany's eggs. I was actually expecting people to suggest that, and I will be honest with the fact that I did consider it a lot when I was writing the story. I ultimately decided that it didn't work for several reasons, the most important of which I will explain here. The first is that Brittany is utterly terrified of passing on health issues to a child. Even though autoimmune diseases aren't necessarily genetic, they do run in families. So, since Brittany has autoimmune diseases, it is possible (if not likely) that any children that have her genetics would develop an autoimmune disease in the future. Brittany does not want to be the cause of that and risk her child going through the same kind of struggles and pain she had to, or even worse. If it is preventable on her end, she wants to do whatever she can to prevent it. They can't test for that stuff in an amniocentesis unless it is a genetic disease, which she doesn't have. The second thing is that Brittany would have to take fertility drugs to harvest eggs to inseminate. The fact that Brittany has severe health problems to begin with only means risking further havoc on her messed up body by taking the drugs. Neither of them would want to risk backsliding Brittany's health to harvest her eggs. Though they don't discuss the option of using Brittany's eggs in the fic, it would have been something they did talk about and dismiss early on (most specifically due to the fact that Brittany doesn't want to risk being the cause of her child having health problems in the future, which they did talk about). It just doesn't fit for them. They do talk about something else in this chapter which is another reason why they wouldn't really consider harvesting Brittany's eggs, so you can find that out in a bit. I just decided in the end that it didn't fit with what I wanted to do. So I'm sorry if that disappoints you guys, but it just didn't work.**

 **The last thing I wanted to talk about was that I had someone comment that they thought this story had too much drama and that they thought that I just couldn't write anything happy. The latter is not true, as I have written quite a few happy things in this story and others. The former is also a sad statement, only for the fact that this story portrays reality for a lot of people. Not everything can be sunshine and rainbows. Though most people don't have to go through the kinds of struggles that Brittany (and Santana) have to go through in this story, there are many people out there who do. I know so many people who do. I know a woman who has multiple sclerosis who works 12 hour rotating shifts and occasionally has to have a coworker punch her as hard as they physically can on her back so she can function when she is having an episode. I know another woman with MS who frequently goes blind in one eye, yet has to work in front of a computer every day and type. I know a woman with lupus who reaches her out-of-pocket maximum on her insurance every single year due to her infusions and her GI specialist visits and rheumatologist appointments. I know a woman with diabetes and chronic pain who typically has at least one surgery a year for some issue or another. I know so many people who suffer constantly, every day, and will continue to do so for the rest of their lives. I include myself in that group. So I'm sorry if this fic is a little too depressing for you, but it is an all to familiar reality for many people.**

 **Okay, I'm sorry for all of that, but I just wanted to get that out there. Thank you all for reading, because it means so much to me to be able to share this story. I hope you enjoy the rest!**

Chapter 27

"Tana, what do you think about this one?" I asked, turning the book toward her.

Santana looked over at what I was indicating and she didn't look impressed. "I don't know, babe," she said noncommittally.

"You haven't liked any of the ones I've picked out," I pouted.

It was true. Santana hadn't seemed to be impressed with any of my selections and it was kind of making me frustrated.

"It's not that I don't really like them, but I think we need to be really sure about which one we pick," Santana explained. "I don't want to make a rash decision just because one looks nice. We need to make sure it is safe first."

"I know, but I don't think that any choice here is going to be unsafe. I am pretty sure they don't put unsafe ones in the catalog," I protested.

Santana sighed. "I get it. I just want to make the right decision."

I laughed a little. "Baby, it isn't that big of a decision. It's just a crib."

Santana frowned. "Just a crib? Britt, the baby needs to have something safe to sleep in that won't fall apart or like kill it when it sleeps. It is important."

I tried to hide my smile, but I couldn't. Santana wasn't even pregnant yet but we had been too excited to not start planning for our (hopefully) upcoming addition. And my wife was so adorably worried about everything that could possibly hurt our future child that she wouldn't settle for anything less than the best and top-rated.

"It is important, but it isn't as important as a lot of other things, like picking a good pediatrician or deciding on a donor. We can pick a crib that isn't tens of thousands of dollars and it will be just as safe."

"You're right," Santana gave in with another sigh. "I'm being kind of crazy, aren't I?"

"Maybe just a little," I teased, holding my thumb and forefinger a little bit apart and scrunching my nose up at her playfully.

"Brittany! Don't be mean!" Santana whined, smacking my shoulder lightly.

"Ow," I grabbed my shoulder in mock pain, falling away from her on the couch.

"Stop whining you big baby," she scolded teasingly. "I didn't hit you that hard."

I gave her a big pout. "Can you kiss it and make it better?"

Santana chuckled, her lips twitching into a smile as she leaned toward me. "I can kiss a lot more than your shoulder," she said, her voice a little husky.

"No, no. None of that!" I said. "We don't have time. We need to meet Gus and Sandy in an hour."

Now Santana pouted, thrusting her plump lower lip out. I couldn't resist leaning up and taking it between my lips, sucking it into my mouth a little before tilting my head and kissing her again. My tongue traced her lip and she opened up to let her tongue meet mine, fighting for dominance.

I moaned and tried to follow her lips when she started to pull away. This pulled a low chuckle out of her as my mouth instinctively searched for hers again.

"Uh-unh," she teased. "You said we couldn't do that."

"Ugh," I groaned, flopping back down onto the couch in dismay. "Why did we agree to go out to dinner with our friends tonight?"

Santana's fingers walked lightly up my stomach as she continued to hover over me, making my abdominal muscles twitch. "Because we haven't hung out with them in awhile," she said, her voice low. "And because we need to get out of the house and take a break from all of the baby talking we've been doing."

"But I like talking about baby stuff," I protested.

"I do, too," Santana agreed, scooting off of me to sit back down and pulling me up with her. "But we haven't even met with the doctor yet or anything, and we're already trying to pick out cribs and paint colors and nursery bedding. We need to back off and relax about it a bit before we start going even crazier than we already have been."

"Okay," I said. "Maybe we have been getting ahead of ourselves."

"You think?" Santana teased, giggling.

I rolled my eyes at her teasing. "I can't help it that I'm excited about us having a baby," I told her.

"I'm excited too. But we aren't pregnant yet."

"Yeah, yeah."

I stood up from the couch, patting her thigh as a sign to tell her we should probably start getting ready to go. She reluctantly followed me to prepare for our dinner out with Gus and Sandy.

I was excited to see them. With all of the stuff going on with my health and then deciding to start planning for a baby, we hadn't seen much of them outside of me seeing Gus at work. Christmas was coming up soon, and we knew that things would get even busier so we wouldn't have as much time to see any of our friends and family. Santana had a doctor's appointment next week with her ob/gyn to discuss options and do an initial examination to start the whole process. We both knew that after that, we would be so focused on baby making that other things would slide.

Neither of us wanted to tell anyone about our plans to start a family yet. Just in case something went wrong or Santana wasn't able to carry for some unknown reason, we didn't want to get anyone's hopes up or be pestered about when we were going to have a baby when it wasn't happening. We both wanted to wait until Santana was definitely pregnant and at least starting her second trimester before we started making any sort of announcements.

We met Gus and Sandy at a restaurant near the mall. It was crowded since it was Saturday night, but we weren't in a hurry.

"Hey Brittany," Sandy greeted with a smile and a hug. "You look really good. How are you feeling?"

I smiled back at her when we broke the embrace, happy to see her. "I'm feeling really well, actually. The medications are working and I feel better than I have in a really long time, thank you."

I was feeling pretty great. My mood was good and I hadn't had any serious depressive episodes since I started seeing a counselor. My health was improving day by day, and the swimming that Santana and I kept up with was putting me in pretty decent shape.

"I'm glad to hear that," she said honestly before turning to Santana with a grin. "Santana! You look incredible as always. You know, if I was twenty years younger…"

Santana, Gus, and I all laughed. This was a common joke between my wife and my best friend's wife.

"You know I would still only have eyes for Britt, Sandy. But I'm sure you would still catch my attention," Santana said with a wink.

Sandy laughed and pulled Santana in for a hug which was returned. I turned and smiled in greeting to Gus, who smiled and nodded back. We had come a long way in our relationship since the beginning, but there was always some awkwardness when you put two shy individuals together.

Santana smiled at Gus and he smiled at her with a blush. We settled into conversation, mostly led by Sandy and Santana, before we were sat at a table. It was nice catching up with them since it had been several months since we had done this. I just hadn't been feeling up to it. Santana had tried getting me to go out for awhile, but I had resisted. It wasn't until I started to feel better that I really wanted to start being around others, and even then we had started with family instead of friends.

Everything was going great until Sandy started talking about their kids at college, and I found it hard to not look at Santana with a goofy smile about us being in the same situation in another twenty years. I glanced at her and saw her biting her lip and trying to keep her eyes off of me. Seems we were having the same problem.

"I'm sorry we're being boring old farts over here, talking about our grown kids," Sandy said. "But I'm sure you'll understand how hard it is not to talk about them when you guys have kids of your own."

My face went red and Santana's eyes widened, the only sign that she was affected by someone talking about us having kids.

"I'm sure we will," Santana conceded, looking a little uncomfortable.

"Are you guys planning on having kids soon?" Sandy asked, oblivious to our reactions.

"No!" I blurted a little too loudly, startling everyone at our table. My blush grew stronger.

"What Brittany means is that with her health problems recently we just want to wait on that," Santana explained, shooting me a look to tell me to calm down.

"That's understandable," Gus said quietly.

"Well I'm sure Brittany will be doing great soon and then it is something you guys can discuss for the future," Sandy said with a soft smile.

Santana and I nodded and the conversation shifted topics, much to our relief. Dinner lasted a few hours and we said a pleasant goodnight around nine o'clock. I was getting tired and Santana could sense it, so she drove us home and led me straight to the bedroom so I could take my pill and start getting ready for bed. Then she went and took care of the dogs before returning and changing into her pajamas, brushing her teeth, and washing her face and then climbing into bed with me.

I curled into her body and she wrapped her arms around me, holding me close to her. I mumbled an 'I love you' to her and my eyes were already drifting shut when she pressed a kiss to my forehead and returned the sentiment.

The following week we were at Santana's doctor's office waiting for her appointment. I was nervously excited, but I could tell that Santana was just nervous. She was fidgeting with her hands and her knee was bouncing as we waited. I put my hand on her knee to try to get her to relax, and gave it a gentle squeeze. She sent me a small smile but her hands didn't stop fidgeting.

I was just about to ask her what was going on when the nurse called us back. We explained why we were there and the nurse wrote down Santana's information and her history before telling us that the doctor would be in shortly to talk to us.

I was a little uncomfortable back in the exam room. Being to so many doctors' offices and getting bad news had made me a little wary of them, and I was never comfortable at the gynecologist's office. So I was sitting quietly, unsure what to talk about to distract Santana that wouldn't be wildly inappropriate, such as making a lewd comment about the drawing labeling all of the components of the female reproductive system.

Santana seemed to sense my strange mood and saw what I was staring at. "It's weird to see how it all looks on the inside. I mean, I know how it is supposed to look, but it is another to see it and what all is responsible to help grow a baby."

She broke me out of my staring and I was able to look at her. "It is kind of weird, but I was thinking more about the size of the poster and how many fingers I could fit inside that ginormous vagina they drew."

Santana's eyes widened before she burst into laughter. I couldn't believe I actually said that, and my face reddened in embarrassment even as I laughed a little with her.

"Oh my God, Britt," Santana gasped between giggles. "I can't believe you said that!"

I shrugged, looking down at the floor before looking back at her. "Sorry?"

Santana laughed harder before she finally started to calm down. "Now all I can think about is how big they drew that vagina. Like, seriously, that would be one giant woman. I think I could fit both my hands up there," she joked.

I giggled. "Probably."

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door and it opened and startled us. We bit back our giggles as the doctor walked in.

"Hello, Santana," he greeted. "How are you doing today?"

"Hi, Dr. Lennox," Santana replied. "I'm doing okay. This is my wife, Brittany."

I shook the doctor's hand as he extended it. "It's great to meet you," he said. "So I see that you ladies are looking at starting a family?"

He looked between the two of us and Santana nodded.

"Excellent," he grinned. "So since you are the patient, Santana, I can safely assume that you are the one who is going to carry at this time?"

"Yeah," Santana confirmed. "Brittany has several health issues and we decided that I should be the one to have our kids."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that Brittany," he told me with a sympathetic look. I gave him a little smile in acknowledgement. "Well we can see what we can do to help you ladies out about starting your family then. Have you decided whether you want to do insemination or in vitro?"

Santana looked at me, a little lost. I was just as lost as her. We hadn't discussed that yet. We had been more focused on the actual baby part of this and not how we were going to really _get_ a baby in the first place.

"Uh, which would you recommend?" Santana asked slowly as she turned back to look at Dr. Lennox.

He chuckled. "Well, there are pros and cons to each method," he explained. "Insemination usually has a lower chance of success than in vitro, but is much less invasive and expensive."

The doctor went into more details about the different options and Santana and I absorbed it all. She looked back at me when he was finished with a questioning look in her eyes.

"It's up to you, baby," I told her. "It's your body, so you know what you would be more comfortable with."

Santana chewed her lip in indecision.

"It isn't something you ladies have to decide today," the doctor said. "You can talk about it and choose which one you are more comfortable with."

"That sounds good," Santana said, and I nodded in agreement.

"Do you have a donor already, or do you need to choose one?"

"No, we don't have a donor," I answered.

"That's fine. We have access to a large list of donors that you can choose from. Once you both pick one that you like, then we can begin the procedures. In the meantime, I will do an exam, much like your yearly exams Santana, and do some tests to make sure that everything is good and that you are ready for pregnancy. Is that okay?"

Santana nodded, and Dr. Lennox indicated that she should change into a gown and get back up on the exam table. He said he would return shortly with a nurse to do the exam and left the room so Santana could change.

"This is kind of way more than I thought it would be," Santana said.

"I should have realized it," I said guiltily. "I was just so caught up on us having a baby that I didn't even think about anything else. We probably should have done some research and discussed this stuff before we came here."

"It's okay. We have time to talk about it, babe. I just am a little overwhelmed at the moment."

"I'm sorry," I told her. "We can have a relaxing evening at home and start talking about it tomorrow."

Santana smiled gratefully at me as she slipped her clothes off. I couldn't help but leer a little at her before she slid the gown on.

"Pervert," she teased with a smirk.

I just grinned at her and blew her a kiss, causing her to smile.

The doctor returned with a nurse and they completed Santana's exam. It was uncomfortable for me to watch because I really did not like the thought of anyone else touching Santana down there, even if it was in a clinical manner. Thankfully it didn't take too long and Santana was being told she could sit back up.

"Okay, Mrs. and Mrs. Lopez," he said cheerfully. "Everything looks good, and we will go ahead and run some bloodwork and once we get those results back we should be good to proceed. Carly here can get you set up with the blood draw and access to the donor database, and there are some printouts here for you about insemination and in vitro fertilization that you can use to help make your decision."

"Thanks," Santana said, and I gave my own thanks to the doctor as he walked out giving a cheerful goodbye.

Santana got dressed and the nurse took her to get her blood drawn. When she was finished, we got the information we needed and headed home.

True to my word, we had a relaxing evening. I made dinner of chicken and rice at home and then drew Santana a bath. She refused to take one without me, so we relaxed in the tub before changing into some sweats and cuddling on the couch to watch "The Princess and the Frog." We didn't talk about the doctor appointment or anything about making a baby at all that night.

We both had to work the next day so we didn't really get to talk until we got home that evening. I had looked over the information Dr. Lennox had given us at the office and had done my own research at work. I knew Santana had done the same, having known my wife long enough to be sure that she would have done as much research as she could before we talked.

"So what do you think about our conception options?" Santana asked, starting our discussion over dinner.

"To be honest, I will support whatever option you feel is best, but I prefer starting with the insemination," I said. "It's just that it is much cheaper than IVF and it just feels more natural. Like, I feel that IVF is so clinical and it wouldn't feel like you were truly conceiving a baby so much as having one implanted."

Santana nodded, her face showing some relief. "I totally agree. IVF just has so much extra that goes along with it, from the fertility drugs to the egg harvesting and embryo implantation. It definitely feels less natural, like you said. I would really like to avoid using any fertility drugs, and I am honestly terrified of having like four babies if we did IVF."

I chuckled at Santana's horrified face, but I understood her fear. Having that many babies to care for at once would be incredibly difficult. "I agree with that," I told her. "As much as I would love to have many babies with you, I don't think four at once is something we could handle."

Santana smiled a little at me. "Probably not. I do think we should start with insemination, and if that doesn't work after awhile then we can try in vitro if we want."

"Okay," I agreed. "And if it isn't something that you want to do, then we can always consider adoption."

Santana looked at me sweetly at that, and I smiled. "Adoption is definitely on the table."

"So we're agreed then? Insemination first, and if that doesn't work after several tries we can discuss either in vitro or adoption?" I asked for clarification.

"Yeah, I think that is a pretty good plan," Santana said, her eyes bright.

"Well that was pretty easy," I said with a light laugh.

"It was. But now we have to agree on a donor," Santana told me, a teasing light in her eyes.

I didn't figure it would be hard to come up with a donor we both liked. We had already discussed that, since Santana was carrying, we would want to look for a donor with similar physical characteristics to mine so we had a higher chance of having a baby that would be kind of a mix of our looks. It was just a matter of looking through the available donors and finding one that also felt right.

Neither of us were quite sure about what 'feeling right' meant, but we would look over all of the available donor information to determine whether or not they would be a viable candidate. I knew I would be looking at education level and occupation, as well as the types of activities they did to help determine the type of person the donor was. Not that those things could give an exact idea of what type of man he would be, but it would help. I didn't need our baby to be the smartest or the most athletic or the best at anything. I just wanted him or her to be happy and healthy and have low risks of medical issues like the ones that I could pass on, which was the whole reason why I was not involved in the carrying of our child.

I knew Santana wanted to look at the same things as me, but I didn't think that she necessarily was using that as any sort of criteria. I truly think she just wanted to get a feel for the man to see if he sat right with her. I had a feeling that she was going to try to find a donor who was as similar to me as possible in personality, education, hobbies, and looks. That didn't matter so much to me, but if Santana felt really strongly about that then I would most definitely take it into consideration.

Picking a donor still wasn't that easy, despite my confidence. The problem wasn't necessarily between Santana and I choosing so much as there were so many donors to look through. We weeded through them by putting in certain criteria we were looking for, such as blonde, blue eyes, etc. but we then had to read through the information for them all.

It took some time. Santana had talked to Dr. Lennox again after she received her test results, which all came back fine. She told him that we wanted to try insemination first, and he told her that our plan was good. He said that he would need to monitor her ovulation and once she became fertile, then we could begin the inseminations. First, we still needed to decide on a donor.

"I really like this one, San," I told her as we were spending another evening looking through the potential donors. We had weeded it down to five possibilities, which we were trying to decide between. The one I was talking about was blonde but actually had green eyes instead of blue. He was tall and athletic, a former wide receiver in college and he was an accountant who liked to spend his free time rock climbing and hiking. He also volunteered at the animal shelter and had no family history of any serious medical conditions.

"I like him too, Britt," Santana began, "but I keep getting drawn back to this one."

Santana showed me the profile of the guy she had been pretty high on the moment she saw his information. He was studying to be a doctor and he liked to run marathons. He was also blonde haired and blue eyed and, other than some high blood pressure in his family, had no health problems in his family. The only thing I didn't like about him was that there wasn't anything listed that he liked to do outside of running, which meant that I felt like I couldn't really get that good of a feel for the type of person he was. It was great that he was going to be a doctor, because it meant that he should like helping people, but it didn't necessarily mean that so I couldn't say exactly how much helping of people that he did.

"He's okay," I told her. "I like that he is a doctor and all, but he isn't really my favorite."

"I know he isn't," Santana said. "I just keep coming back to him for some reason. Him and this one."

Santana indicated the profile of another one I really liked. This guy was a chemistry teacher who liked reading, sailing, singing, and he did a lot of work with disadvantaged kids and education programs in the public schools. He had no significant family medical history and liked to bike and do martial arts. He also had blonde hair and blue eyes, which Santana definitely preferred. One of my favorite things about him, however, was that he provided childhood pictures that we could view. He was an adorable kid, and he honestly looked quite a bit like me when I was that age, which Santana really loved.

"I really like him too, baby," I said. "He is definitely one of my favorites."

"I agree. I like the last two as well, just not as much, so unless you really like them I think we can rule them out," Santana suggested.

"Sounds good to me."

So we had narrowed our choices down to three: my number one pick, Santana's number one pick, and the one we both had as our second favorite. We spent the next few days discussing which ones we liked more and more, but life started to get in the way. Christmas was upon us and we had to visit with family, none of which knew what we were planning on doing, so our discussions were kind of put on the backburner.

That didn't mean that either of us stopped thinking about it. And the more I thought about it, the more I started to prefer my second favorite over my initial choice. I didn't know what it was, but there was something about him that I really started to like. The fact that he liked to teach and he was really involved in spreading science education to kids really sat strongly with me. He was fit and healthy and the chances of our baby having health problems due to his genetics were low. And the more I thought about the chance of having a baby that looked a little like me, the more I really liked the thought since I wouldn't have the chance to have a biological child.

Once things calmed down a bit, Santana and I finally sat down again to really discuss things. She had been monitoring her ovulation with Dr. Lennox, and we hadn't made a decision on a donor for her first ovulation cycle in December. So if we wanted to try the first insemination the next time she was ovulating in January then we needed to make a decision pretty soon.

"What do you think, San?" I asked a few days after Christmas as we cuddled in bed, our arms around each other's waists as we faced each other.

"I don't know Britt," she answered. "I still really like the same guy, but the more I think about it, the more I really like the teacher. I just hate that we don't seem to both like the same one."

"I actually like the teacher more now," I informed her with a smile. "He is the one I would pick."

Santana's face lit up. "Really?"

I nodded, my lips starting to turn up in a smile. "Yeah. He is honestly my favorite one now."

Santana grinned. "He is mine too," she enthused. "I think he looks a lot like you and he seems like a really good guy. I think he would be a great choice. My initial choice just seemed too stuck up after looking at the other ones some more."

"So we are going to go with the teacher then?" I asked, my smile cautiously growing.

"Yeah, definitely," Santana agreed, her face bright with joy. "We finally found a baby daddy."

We chuckled, giddy at the thought of finally getting our family started. Now we only had to reserve the donor's sperm and get in touch with Dr. Lennox to set up the insemination for when Santana would be ovulating. Then we might be pregnant within a few short months.

"I can't believe we might have a baby by this time next year," I said in awe.

"Me either, Britt," Santana said, shaking her head a little at the thought.

"You are going to make such a beautiful baby," I told her, cupping her cheek and caressing it with my thumb.

Her face softened as she looked into my eyes. "I really wish we could make a baby together," she said quietly. "Part of you and part of me."

I gave her an understanding smile. "I do, too. But I am happy having a baby that is just part of you, because I love everything about you and that includes your DNA."

Santana giggled. "I'm glad you love my DNA, babe. I just would really love to see a mini-Brittany running around our house."

"I would prefer a mini-Santana, so I win," I joked, sticking my tongue playfully out at her.

She rolled her eyes a little before meeting mine again. "I just hope that he or she gets some of the same features you have."

I shrugged my shoulder, letting my hand trail down to her waist again. "That doesn't matter so much to me," I said honestly. "I mean, it would be nice, but I just want him or her to be healthy. The baby could come out with blue hair and purple eyes and I would love it because it would be ours."

Santana grinned and laughed. "Blue hair and purple eyes would be pretty cool. We could definitely always tell which kid was ours then in a crowd," she joked.

I chuckled and agreed. "I love you," I said softly. "Thank you for planning on carrying our baby."

Santana looked lovingly back at me. "I would do anything for you," she stated, her eyes looking deeply into mine. "I love you so much."

I leaned forward and met her lips with mine. We kissed tenderly, letting our mouths caress each others' gently. Neither of us deepened it. We just wanted to convey how much we felt about the other through the kiss. Our lips continued to kiss softly for several minutes until we finally pulled apart with a final loving peck. Santana rolled over so her back was to me and scooted herself so I could be the big spoon. I wrapped myself around her tightly, burying my nose into her hair and I held her as we fell asleep.

 **A/N 2: So basically just some Brittana goodness this chapter. They are all about having a baby, yay! Are you guys excited? Glad they were able to easily make decisions about how and what they wanted to do?**

 **I feel like not much happened this chapter, so I don't really know what else to say. What do you guys think? Good, bad, or ugly? Predictions for the future?**

 **Also, I just wanted to give you all a head's up about the fact that I may be getting a little overwhelmed with life, just in case I am unable to post or anything in the future. I have been working my own job and covering another woman's for several weeks now, and I just found out that she is expected to be out for about another 2 months. They have nobody else who knows the job like I do, but I also have responsibilities with my own job that I can't put off, so I will still be doing both for the next couple of months. I know things will get crazy and stressful and shit, so don't blame me if I can't keep up with the way I've been doing things!**


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

Our first insemination appointment was pretty nerve wracking. We were both hopeful it would work and nervous that it would at the same time. Not to mention that we had to undergo the procedure in the first place.

Dr. Lennox did everything he could to help us, and especially Santana, relax. I held her hand and murmured loving words into her ear while I ran my fingers through her hair the whole time he did the procedure and for the several minutes after that Santana needed to lie there. She twitched a little in discomfort when he inserted the tubing into her uterus, but other than that she said she was okay.

I was pretty overprotective over the next couple of weeks. If the procedure worked and Santana was pregnant, then I didn't want to risk anything happening to my wife and our child. I wouldn't let Santana really do anything. I did all of the cooking and the cleaning and the laundry. We still went to the pool so I could swim, but, apart from letting Santana stick her feet in the water, I wouldn't let her do anything.

Santana was incredibly amused by all of this and even protested that she wouldn't break if she helped around the house, but I insisted. I told her it was the least I could do to repay her for all of the time she took care of me when I was dealing with my rheumatoid arthritis. Not to mention how I wanted to take care of the future mother of my child.

Those two weeks to wait to take a pregnancy test seemed like they took forever. We even waited a couple extra days just to make sure. Finally, it was time. We waited impatiently for the allotted time and were both crushed when it was negative. Santana apologized to me but I reassured her that it was absolutely not her fault. We both knew that it would probably take several tries before she got pregnant, but it didn't mean that we could stop how we felt when it didn't work the first time.

We did things to keep our minds off of it. Santana started her period pretty much the next day after she took the test, so I worked on pampering her with massages and relaxing bubble baths. I made her favorite meal of spaghetti and meatballs with garlic breadsticks and made a special trip to Kyle's bakery to bring home cupcakes. It took some effort, but we kept our spirits up by looking forward to the next insemination and the hope that burned in us that we would soon be expecting a baby.

The next insemination went much the same way. The only difference was I was pressing kisses to Santana's cheek and forehead during the procedure. I was adamant about our baby being conceived in a loving environment, and I felt it couldn't get more loving than me whispering how I felt about Santana while giving her kisses. Santana would return the sentiments and when the medical staff left the room, she pulled my mouth to hers and we gave each other soft, heartfelt pecks until she was able to get up and get dressed again.

We were due to take the pregnancy test the week of my birthday. I wanted to do it the first possible day that we could, but Santana put her foot down. She said that she didn't want the possibility of a negative test to put a damper on my birthday, so she said that we would wait until after my birthday to take the test. It was a few days after the initial two week mark, so it would be a good time to do it. I was just impatient about it. I wanted to know. But I understood Santana's reasoning and let it be. We would take the test after my birthday.

My birthday was on a Friday this year. I didn't know what we were planning on doing. It was my 30th birthday, so Santana had insisted on planning a surprise for me. I told her not to overdo anything just in case she was pregnant. Plus, I didn't want a huge celebration. I had mixed feelings about turning thirty. I had a beautiful wife and we were planning on starting a family, and my health conditions were being managed, so my age wasn't too much of a bother. But turning thirty meant that I was entering a new decade of my life. I was leaving my twenties behind and every year older meant more risks of new health problems or side effects of being on my medications.

I woke up before my alarm was due to go off on the morning of my birthday due to soft kisses on my cheek, trailing down toward my neck.

"Mmmm, wha?" I mumbled groggily.

"Wake up, birthday girl," Santana murmured against the skin of my neck, causing goosebumps to spread across my flesh and tingles to shoot through my body.

"I'm awake," I told her, more coherent than I was just a moment before.

"Good," she husked, her tongue licking a wet circle just below my jaw.

I inhaled sharply as arousal pooled low in my belly. "San, you know we can't have sex," I whimpered. "We can't risk it if you are possibly pregnant."

"I know _I_ can't get off, but it doesn't mean that I can't give you a birthday orgasm," she husked into my ear.

I was pretty desperate for an orgasm. Since the last insemination we had abstained from sex, much like the last time. We had a very healthy sex life, but neither of us wanted to risk possibly causing a complication if the insemination did work so we agreed to no sex. Santana had offered to still take care of me, but I told her that if I couldn't touch her then she shouldn't touch me. It seemed that she was going to ignore that mandate.

"Baby," I tried to protest, "you know how hard it is for me not to touch you if you are sexing me up."

Santana chuckled, her low raspy laughter sending hot breaths against my neck and making me shiver. She pushed herself up and straddled me, looking down at me in amusement and desire.

"Well, I could always tie your hands up so you don't," she threatened lustily. "But I think you can be a good girl and just keep your hands to yourself, can't you?"

I swallowed hard, my hands going up to rest on Santana's hips almost to prove my point. "San," I begged, although I didn't know exactly what I was begging for.

Santana leaned down to whisper in my ear again. "Just think of it as your first birthday present, babe."

I moaned and my hands fell off of her hips and moved up above my head, indicating that I would do what she asked. Santana smirked at me before kissing me hungrily. Her hands went to the hem of my shirt, pushing it up above my breasts. She broke away from my mouth to bring it down to my breasts where she sucked my nipple into her mouth, kneading the flesh in her hands.

My hips bucked up into her, and she stretched herself so she was lying over me. She released my breasts and began kissing down my stomach, scooting her body down as she trailed lower. Her fingers hooked into the top of my pajamas and tugged. I lifted my hips to help her and she pulled off my pants and panties and discarded them to the side.

"So beautiful," Santana breathed as she looked over my mostly naked form.

She settled herself between my thighs that had parted instinctually for her. She kissed up my thighs, teasing me, before finally dragging her tongue through my folds.

"Fuck," I moaned, my hips rocking to try to increase the friction Santana's mouth was giving me.

Santana put my thighs over her shoulders and brought her hands up to squeeze my breasts and pinch my nipples as her tongue licked my core. I propped myself up to watch her, and her eyes locked onto my hooded gaze. She sucked on my clit and my head dropped back in pleasure. I threaded my fingers through her hair, unable to resist touching her in some way.

I knew I wouldn't be able to last long. Once her tongue slid inside me, I was gone. I shattered, my core clenching around her tongue as I cried out. My fingers tightened in her hair as I pulled her harder into me, helping me ride out my orgasm. I finally relaxed, falling back onto the bed with a thud, my breath coming in short gasps.

I gave a final twitch as Santana kissed my folds before crawling her way back up my body. I gave her a satisfied grin as I saw her smug face, her chin and lips covered in my juices. I used a lazy thumb to wipe some away before I cupped her cheek and brought her down for a kiss. I tasted myself on her mouth and I almost rolled her over so I could have my way with her as another spark of desire went through me. But I held myself back, my caution over her possible pregnancy keeping me in check.

"Happy birthday, Britt," Santana said after she pulled back.

"Thank you," I said sincerely.

Santana just laid herself down beside me when my alarm went off. I groaned in frustration as I turned over to turn it off and took my pill. I rolled back over to give Santana my usual morning kiss and pressed my forehead to hers briefly before I got out of bed to begin my routine. I took care of the dogs and took a shower. I came back out of the bathroom after brushing my teeth to find Santana still in bed.

"You're going to be late, Tana," I warned her.

"I'm not going to work today," she said, her eyes trailing my towel clad body.

I gave her a concerned look. "You okay? Are you sick?"

"Yes, I'm fine," she reassured me. "I just wanted to get your birthday celebration surprise taken care of, so I took the day off."

I gave her a suspicious look. "You aren't planning some huge thing, are you? I don't want you to overwork yourself, so if you are you better scale it back."

She rolled her eyes at me, although her face showed a little smile. "I promise I am not overworking myself. I just needed some time to get everything done so we could celebrate right when you get home from work."

I searched her face for any sign that she was lying about how much she was going to be doing today. "Okay," I conceded. "Just promise me you aren't going to do anything crazy."

"I promise," she said sincerely. Her eyes darkened as I dropped my towel to start getting dressed. "But I can't promise I can keep my hands off of you again if you don't put some clothes on soon."

I chuckled and smirked at her, grabbing my clothes and getting dressed quickly. Santana's face showed a little disappointment when I covered up, so I went back to the bed and gave her a kiss before I headed to finish getting ready. I left Santana in bed with a final goodbye kiss then headed to work.

I kept in touch with her throughout the day, making sure that she was still okay. She called me when I was on my lunch to let me know that everything was fine, and her plans for the evening were falling into place perfectly. I was relieved to hear her chipper voice and I could tell that she was in a great mood.

Finally, my work day was over. I was excited to get home and see what Santana had planned for me. I carried my box of candies Gus had given me into the house and immediately the scent of my favorite meal that Santana made hit my nose.

"I'm home," I called out, and Santana yelled that she was in the kitchen.

I greeted the dogs and made my way to my wife. "It smells great," I told her as she stood over the stove, stirring the meat and vegetables that were cooking in the pan.

I walked up behind her and snaked my arms around her waist, pressing a kiss to her temple. "Fajitas are my favorite," I said.

"I know," she said, turning her head to me with a smile and she pecked my lips quickly before turning back to the meal. "It's almost done, so go ahead and take a seat."

I did as she asked, and that was when I saw the bouquet of white roses on the table. I couldn't help but grin, knowing my wife loved to give me flowers. Santana transferred the food to serving dishes and brought everything over, ignoring my offer to help.

We talked about our days a bit as we ate, and I thanked her for the flowers. Once dinner was finished, I ignored her protests to sit back down and helped her clean up. She got the familiar bakery box and pulled out a small cake decorated with white roses that Kyle had done a beautiful job with. I blew out the candle Santana had lit, thankful she hadn't tried to put thirty of them on there, and we enjoyed the delicious dessert.

"Thank you for everything baby. It was delicious," I told Santana as she put the cake away.

"You're welcome, birthday girl," she replied with a smile. "Now it's time for presents!"

I grinned at her enthusiasm and she led me into the living room. She went to go get my presents from wherever she had hidden them and returned to the room with several wrapped packages. I opened the card first, giving her a kiss in thanks at her loving sentiments she had written. I opened a gorgeous necklace with blue diamonds, which Santana said reminded her of my eyes sometimes. I naturally got matching earrings, and I wondered when I would have the occasion to wear all of this nice jewelry. My final present was a collection of several movies that I hadn't added to my collection yet.

"This is awesome, Tana," I enthused. "Thank you."

"There is one more thing," she told me, grabbing her phone off of the coffee table. "It was kind of a last minute thing though, so it isn't here yet."

"That's okay," I said. "I'm sure it will be great."

She smiled shyly at me and messed with her phone a minute before meeting my eyes. "I had some help with this part, but Lord Tubbington didn't want to cooperate," she said.

I gave her a confused look as she turned her phone around to show me a picture. Lance and Lady were lying together on the floor, a sign propped up beneath their heads. It was a cute picture of them, and I smiled a little before my focus went to the words on the sign.

"What?" I asked in surprise, taking in the words. I looked up at Santana with wide eyes to see her face breaking out into a grin. "Does that mean what I think it means?"

Santana nodded. "They wanted to help let you know they are going to be big siblings soon. I'm pregnant, Brittany."

"Oh my God!" I exclaimed in excitement, so much emotion crashing into me as I pulled Santana into a hug. "We're going to have a baby. I love you so much!"

"I love you, too," Santana replied, her voice thick with emotion. I was pressing frantic kisses to the side of her face as I held her, tears stinging my eyes as my love and happiness overwhelmed me.

I finally pulled back to see happy tears falling down Santana's cheeks, a giant grin on her face showing her dimples. I cupped her face in my hands. "I can't believe it," I breathed in awe. "I thought you weren't going to take the test yet though."

Santana looked a little guilty, but her smile didn't diminish. "I lied," she told me unapologetically. "I wanted to be able to surprise you on your birthday if it was positive, so I took a test yesterday morning. It was positive, so I called Dr. Lennox to get in for a blood test today and it was positive as well. That was part of the reason I didn't go into work today."

I tried to be a little upset that I wasn't there for any of that, but I found that I couldn't. I was too happy we were having a baby. "I am so freaking happy, Santana," I said. "But what would you have done if it was negative?"

She shrugged a little. "I would have waited to take another one with you tomorrow," she explained. "There was always a chance that it could be a false negative, so it wouldn't have hurt to do more than one."

"Well I am glad you didn't wait. This was the best birthday present ever!"

She grinned again and I couldn't resist kissing her. We were so loving with each other the rest of the night, giddy in our excitement and joy. I knew things would change a lot now. I scolded Lord Tubbington when I saw him for not participating in the family picture. I told him that he was going to have to be a good big brother, and he rubbed against both mine and Santana's legs in apology before scampering off. I hoped it meant that he was going to be nice to the baby, but one never knew with Tubbs.

I was super watchful with Santana for the rest of the night, and made sure we went to bed super early. I held her gently in my arms, my hands cradling her flat tummy where our son or daughter was starting to grow. This was one of the best days of my life.

The next day Santana had arranged for a birthday party for me. Our friends and family (with the exception of Gabe, who had a game that day) gathered at a local restaurant to celebrate my birthday. It was hard to keep our big news to ourselves, but, apart from being called out for our big smiles sometimes that were easily explained by saying we were happy due to my birthday, we were able to keep it a secret.

I was definitely more protective now that I knew Santana was carrying our baby. She still insisted on coming to the pool with me, and I let her get in but only to float around a bit. She was absolutely not allowed into the hot tub. We had gotten pretty used to eating healthy since I had started trying to lose weight, but we both wanted to make sure Santana ate a well balanced diet so our little baby could grow well.

I pampered her every day. I made her favorite meals. I gave her massages. I got her pretty much whatever she asked for. Santana protested, but my actions still made her smile. I told her I wouldn't stop because I was determined to take care of my loves in every way, so she just gave in.

It wasn't long before her morning sickness started. It was actually more of evening sickness instead. I started making light meals for dinner in hopes that it would help settle her stomach, but no matter what I did it ended up coming right back up. I held her hair back and rubbed her back soothingly while she emptied her stomach. I did my best to make sure she stayed hydrated and, once the vomiting abated for the night, I would cuddle with her until she fell asleep. She became tired a lot more easily, so we spent most evenings on the couch where she would nap until her sickness would start.

Our routine stayed the same for weeks. I pressed goodbye kisses to her belly every morning before I left her for work and goodnight kisses every night when we got in bed. Santana would always cradle my head lovingly when I did so, and then pull me up to her lips for her own kiss. I was reluctant to have sex since I didn't want anything to happen to the baby, but Santana convinced me it was safe and practically begged me to touch her so I did. I did it gently, but we were both satisfied in the end.

Our wedding anniversary arrived, and Santana had actually started to show a little bit. She had the tiniest little bump that I loved to kiss and talk to and hold in my hands. My favorite thing to do was hold my hands over Santana's while she held onto her bump. It felt like we were both holding our baby. It felt like we were already a family.

We had decided to take an easy day for our anniversary. We took a leisurely walk around the zoo, reminiscent of the day we first admitted that we were interested in each other. It was one of my favorite days because it was the start of our relationship. I made sure we took plenty of breaks, both to help Santana, who became increasingly more tired as the day wore on, and to help myself since a lot of walking tended to make the arthritis in my feet flare up.

We were standing and watching the otters. Santana had her arm looped through mine and had her head resting on my shoulder, and I felt so unbelievably happy at the moment.

"I think I want to give Otto the Otter to the baby," I told her as we watched the otters swim around.

"Really? I got it for you, babe," Santana said, a little in surprise.

"Yeah," I confirmed. "It's just that Otto was the first real gift you gave me, and it reminds me of the day when we first really started our relationship. It was so special to me- both the stuffed animal and that day. I want our baby to have it because it is kind of a symbol of our relationship."

Santana had lifted her head off of my shoulder to look at me with a soft smile. Her eyes were sparkling with love. "I think that's perfect, Brittany. The baby's first stuffed animal should have special meaning, and I think Otto the Otter is incredibly special."

"I think so, too," I told her with a loving look before cupping her cheek and giving her a soft kiss.

"You wanna know something?" Santana asked when we pulled apart.

"What?"

"It was right here when I realized that I was falling in love with you," Santana confessed.

"Really?" I asked, surprised.

Santana gave me a bashful look and nodded. "Yeah. You were talking about how the otters held hands so they didn't float away from each other, and I just kept thinking how badly I wanted to hold your hand then so you wouldn't go away from me. That's when I knew my feelings were much stronger than a crush."

It felt like my heart was going to explode as it overflowed with the love I felt for my wife. I didn't know how my life could get much more perfect than this. I moved my arm that Santana's was linked to so I could intertwine our fingers together.

"Now you can hold my hand forever, Santana. I won't ever let you float away," I promised.

She grinned at me and squeezed my hand. "Me neither," she vowed. "But we should probably move on so we can get home soon. The baby is getting tired."

I easily agreed and we made our way toward the entrance. I didn't want Santana to over-exert herself, so we took our time but then headed straight home where I laid her down on the couch for a nap while I made dinner. We needed a quiet night in so Santana could rest and relax. I wanted to make sure she and the baby were taken care of.

I woke her up once dinner was ready with a gentle caress to her face. Her eyes fluttered open and she gave me a sleepy smile.

"Dinner is ready baby," I told her softly.

She held my hand to her cheek and turned her head to press a kiss to my palm. "Sorry I fell asleep," she said, her voice huskier than normal from sleep. "The baby is definitely wearing me out today. I feel bad that we can't go out for our first anniversary."

I shook my head a little, wanting to make it clear that I absolutely had no problem with our day. "It was the best anniversary celebration I could imagine, San," I said truthfully. "We could have stayed in bed all day and watched movies for all I cared. I want to do whatever you and the baby need, and if that is sleep and having dinner at home then I am 100% happy with that."

"Maybe we can get in bed and watch those movies later," she said with a smile. "But first, the baby wants to eat."

I laughed. "Sounds like your appetite is better. Is your sickness starting to improve?"

"I think so. I sure as hell hope so," she said emphatically.

I looked at her in mock horror, cupping my hands over her belly. "Don't say words like that around the baby," I jokingly scolded.

Santana rolled her eyes at me and held her hand up so I could help her stand. I pulled her up and we headed into the kitchen to eat dinner. Santana ended up feeling a little nauseated but didn't throw up. We counted that as a win.

We exchanged gifts. Santana had gotten me a new set of deluxe pots and pans that I had been wanting, plus a bracelet. I got her a baby charm for her charm bracelet plus a diamond necklace in the shape of the infinity symbol. Then we went to bed and watched movies until we fell asleep.

The next week we had our first ultrasound appointment with Dr. Lennox. We were both really excited to see our baby for the first time.

"How are you feeling Santana?" Dr. Lennox asked when he walked into the room.

"Pretty good," she replied. "My morning sickness has been in the evening and it was pretty bad to start with, but the past couple of nights I either haven't thrown up or thrown up just once."

"That's good to hear. Hopefully that continues and means that you will be finished with all of that." He looked at her chart briefly. "I see you've put on a few pounds, which is good to see. It means that the morning sickness hasn't affected you too badly then."

"Yeah, I can tell I've put on weight. I have a little bump already and I think I am going to have to get new pants soon," Santana said happily.

"You're showing already?" He asked, the hint of a smile showing on his lips.

"Yeah, it's really cute," I told him with a grin.

"Well, let's go ahead and check out your baby and get you ladies some pictures of your little one," he said, and we readily agreed.

He squirted the cold goo on Santana's little belly and grabbed the wand to start searching around for the baby. I couldn't make heads or tails out of the pictures that popped up on the screen, but as long as he could then that was all that mattered.

"Hmmm," he hummed thoughtfully.

"What?" Santana asked.

"Is something wrong?" I asked at the same time.

Dr. Lennox ignored us for a brief moment as he moved the wand around before he seemed to find something he was looking for. He flipped a switch and we heard swishing sounds that could only be the baby's heartbeat. He then looked at us with a grin. "No, nothing's wrong," he reassured us. "I was just confirming my suspicions. You're carrying twins, Santana."

My eyes widened in shock as Santana's hand squeezed mine hard.

"Twins?" Santana asked, breathless with surprise.

"That's right," he confirmed. "You ladies are going to be mommies to two little ones."

I looked at Santana in surprise and awe. She met my eyes with a mixture of shock and happiness and a little bit of fear in her eyes.

"Twins," I whispered. I felt the beginning of a smile tugging at my lips, and it wasn't until I saw the happiness start to overtake Santana's face that I let it break free.

"Twins, babe," she told me, a giddy laugh escaping her.

"Oh my God, I love you so much," I told her, tears pooling in my eyes. I cupped her face and kissed her hard. "You're so perfect."

Santana grinned at me.

"So I take it this is definitely happy news?" Dr. Lennox asked us, amusement in his voice.

"Most definitely," Santana said. "Although I am a little concerned about extra complications, but two babies are perfect."

"More than perfect," I agreed. "We obviously will have to do some rethinking with our planning, but I couldn't be happier."

"Great! So do you mommies want to see your babies then?"

We nodded enthusiastically, and Dr. Lennox proceeded to point out our little babies on the screen. Santana and I both were overcome with the love we already felt for our children, and neither of us could stop the tears from falling as we looked at our babies for the first time. Dr. Lennox did discuss some of the extra things to be aware of since it was confirmed that we were having twins, and we made a note to do some extra research on it. He also made sure to print off pictures of the ultrasound for us and even made us a DVD that we could watch at home.

I think I had just found my new favorite movie.

"Are you really okay with this?" I asked Santana as we left the doctor's office and got into the car.

Santana looked at me a little in surprise. "Yeah. Why would you think I wasn't?"

I shrugged a little. "I didn't really think you weren't, but twins are a lot to handle, and you're the one who is going to be carrying them, which means that you are the one who is going to be most impacted by it. And you had said you didn't want to do in vitro because of the higher risk of multiples."

"Britt, I know I was hesitant about in vitro because of the risk of carrying multiples, but that was more because I didn't want to have like four or five babies," she explained. "This is only two, which we should easily be able to handle. Besides, this happened naturally, so it was like it was destined for us. Fate wanted to give us two babies right now. And you always say that you believe things happen for a reason, so we were supposed to have twins."

"I guess we were," I said with a smile. "I just can't believe it. Two babies San! I love them so much already."

"Me too," she said softly, cupping her belly.

"Hi babies," I cooed to her bump as I leaned over the center console to get close to it. I put my hand over Santana's to hold our babies with her. "Your mommies love you, and we can't wait to meet you. I know we have awhile still before we can, but just know that we are so excited for you and you are both going to be so loved and cared for."

"Hey, Britt?" Santana tried to get my attention. I hummed, letting her know I was listening. "I think we're going to need to get another otter."

I laughed and agreed. I was looking forward to the rest of this pregnancy. Things were definitely looking bright for us.

 **A/N: So what did you guys think of Santana's birthday surprise for Brittany? She is pregnant! With twins! Yay! Or no?**

 **So a lot happened this chapter, including the inseminations (which I admit to knowing nothing about really), the positive test, their quiet first anniversary, and the news that they are going to be expecting two little ones. I think they are definitely getting to that amazingly good place again, and things are looking brighter. Do you guys agree?**

 **What do you think the sexes of the babies will be? Who will they tell the news to first? Any other thoughts?**

 **There are only two chapters left in this, so we are definitely wrapping things up here. I appreciate you all for reading for this long, and I hope you like the rest of the story!**


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

Although we had discussed buying another otter so our twins each had one, in the end we bought a tiger stuffed animal. They both represented two of my favorite animals, and we figured we could wait and see our babies' personalities and determine who got which toy.

After the news about our extra addition, Santana and I had a discussion about the house. We had only planned on one kid, so we were going to turn the guest room into a nursery and make the office a guest room with a computer. As the baby grew up, it would become his or her bedroom and then we would look at moving into a bigger house once we decided to try for another baby. But now that we had two babies on the way, we needed to rethink our plans.

"Do you really want to stay in this house?" I asked Santana over dinner one night a couple of weeks after our ultrasound appointment.

"I love this house, babe," Santana said. "I don't see a reason why we need to move right now."

"I love it, too. But as the twins get older I don't feel right cramming them in the same small room, and we just don't have the space to separate them in this house," I said.

"They would be okay in the same room for the first year or so. It would make it easier on us anyways. Then we could look at moving somewhere with more room, especially if we decide to maybe have another one."

I smiled a little. "You would want to have another?"

Santana looked sweetly at me. "With you, of course I would. But I think it would just be easier to stay here for now and then look for a new house when they are at least a year. Besides, I already need to look at a new car since my Mazda is just too small, so I would really like to not have the stress of looking for a new place to live and a new car to drive."

"Okay, okay. You're right," I gave in. "It would be better to wait. I guess that means we can start decorating the nursery then?"

I smiled hopefully at Santana. She gave me a look that said she wanted to argue. We hadn't agreed on what theme we wanted to go with yet, which was the hold up.

"Fine," she huffed. "I guess we can do the animal theme. It is at least unisex since we don't know what we are having yet."

"Yay!" I enthused, clapping my hands a little in excitement. "I knew you would like the animal one eventually. Plus, the otter and tiger stuffed animals would go with it really well."

"I know," Santana said, pouting a little. "I just really liked that one with the zig-zag pattern instead."

"Poor baby," I cooed. "It wasn't very fun though, and the animals are all happy and playful, which would be a good environment for the babies."

"Whatever," Santana huffed good-naturedly, not really caring anymore about not getting her pick of nursery themes. "So Gabe is going to be back in town next week. Do you think we could tell him?"

We had been waiting on telling anyone about the pregnancy yet for several reasons. The biggest being that Santana had just passed the first trimester mark, and we didn't want to tell anyone until we got into the second trimester in the first place.

The second reason was that we wanted to tell Gabe first. He was really the one who had brought Santana and me together. Without him coming up to talk to me at the bar that day I would likely have never met the love of my life and we wouldn't be starting a family. He was the most important person in Santana's life (apart from me and the babies) and we felt that he should be the first to know.

The third reason we hadn't started telling anyone yet was because we really didn't want that many people to know. Once we told Gabe, we planned on telling my family and then our closest friends, such as Kyle, Gus, and Sandy. Since carrying twins had higher risks in general, we didn't want everyone and their brother to know until it was mostly unavoidable.

The problem with that, however, was that Santana was going to be showing a lot more soon. And with the weather getting warmer, not to mention the fact that my wife didn't own a lot of clothing that wasn't form-fitting (not that I was complaining), it was going to be really hard to hide her bump soon. Santana said she would inform her work when it became necessary, and I would do the same in order to be able to take my own maternity leave.

I was looking forward to being able to tell people because I was excited for people to know that Santana and I were starting our family. But I just had this fear that, if we went around practically bragging about it, then something bad would happen. It was one of those things that got stuck in my head since I had a history of good things happening in my life, only for something bad to follow. I talked it over a lot with Diane in my counseling sessions, and her advice was to minimize the people we told so it felt like I had control over the situation. She felt like this would make me feel better, and I agreed.

"Yeah, I think it would be great to tell Gabe," I told Santana with a smile. "Do you think he is going to be excited?"

Santana chuckled. "He talked to me about all of the babies we would have when you and I started dating," she informed me. "Not to mention him harping me on it after we got engaged and when we got married. I think he is going to be super excited about it."

We came up with a fun way to break the news to Gabe. We decided to go visit him at his apartment the day he arrived back in the city. I promised to cook dinner so we didn't have to go out, saying that it would be better for catching up and relaxing after his long trip. He agreed, so Santana and I gathered all of our food and the gift we got him and drove over to see him.

Santana had worn her baggiest shirt, which was doing a decent job of hiding her bump, but I was afraid he would feel it when he hugged her since they always hugged super tight. I was also afraid that he would squeeze too hard and hurt the babies somehow, so I wanted to head that off as protection as well as to prevent him from ruining our surprise. Santana and I had a plan that we hoped would work.

"Hey!" I greeted him enthusiastically when he opened the door to the apartment. He opened his arms to me, since I entered first, and I wrapped my arms tightly around him.

"Hey Britt," Gabe welcomed as he hugged me.

"I've missed you," I murmured in his ear, before making my voice quieter under the guise of keeping a secret. "Be careful when you hug her. She overworked herself at the gym yesterday and is in a bit of pain, but she is too stubborn to admit it. Just please take it easy on her."

Gabe gave me a strange look when he pulled back, but I was relieved to see him hug Santana gently and briefly, settling for kissing her cheek and cradling her face in his hands for a moment as they greeted each other. He didn't seem to notice her bump, so step one of the plan appeared to be successful.

Santana and Gabe followed me into the kitchen where I set up what I would need to heat up dinner. I had done most of the prep at home, so all I needed to do was preheat the oven and transfer the dish into the oven when it was ready. They sat down at the table in the dining area while I did just that, and I tuned in a little to their conversation as they caught up.

Once dinner was in the oven, I joined them at the table. Gabe had just offered Santana a drink, and she had to decline which I knew would make him suspicious.

"Actually Gabe," I got his attention. "Santana and I have a present for you that we would like you to open before we do anything else."

"But my birthday was months ago," he said with a grin. "Gimme!"

I rolled my eyes a little as Santana did the same. He was such a big kid sometimes. We both knew he would have so much fun with the twins.

Santana handed over the wrapped box, which he eagerly tore open. He removed the lid to show a t-shirt with the words 'World's Greatest Uncle' taking up the front. His eyes widened in surprise as his mouth started to turn up at the corners.

"Are you guys going to have a baby?" Gabe asked happily, his eyes darting between Santana and me.

"San's got two buns in the oven," I told him with a grin.

His eyes bugged and his gaze fixed firmly on his sister. His mouth formed a soft smile as his expression turned to one of disbelieving awe. Santana was grinning at him, tears pooling in her eyes as she cupped her belly which tightened the shirt and showed her bump.

"Twins?"

Santana nodded.

"Oh my God," he whispered. "I'm so happy for you guys!"

Gabe darted out of his chair and wrapped Santana up tightly. I panicked a little at his enthusiasm.

"Easy, easy! Please do not crush our babies," I scolded him, only half joking.

Gabe loosened his grip to pull back and kiss Santana's forehead heartily before turning to me with a big grin.

"Look at you, mama bear. Being all protective of your mate and cubs!" Gabe laughed.

"Did you seriously just call me a bear?" I asked, shooting him a look.

"I think he called me and our babies bears too, babe," Santana said, amused.

"Oh, take it easy. I just meant that you are already worried about your babies even though they aren't here yet. I think it's perfect," he told me with an approving smile. He moved around the table and pulled me into a tight hug before whispering in my ear. "You are the best wife to her, and I know you won't let anything happen to her or those babies. I'm glad she has you, and you have her."

"Thanks," I whispered to him, my eyes pooling with my own tears.

Gabe pulled back and he wiped at his own eyes. "Congratulations to you both. And I am so going to wear the shit out of that shirt because you know I'm going to be their favorite uncle."

"Language!" Santana scolded and smacked his arm while I laughed.

"Sorry! Geez, it isn't like they can hear me," he protested, holding his arm.

"San and I made a pact to watch our language since we don't want the babies to be exposed to harsh language even if they aren't born yet," I told him.

This wasn't entirely true. Santana thought it was adorable that I talked to the babies every day, and this led to a discussion one night about how much they could hear and understand, which led to Santana freaking out thinking that they could hear everything. It almost led to her refusing to have sex, but thankfully she couldn't withstand that, so she forced me into a pact to watch our language instead. I figured it was a fair price to pay.

We spent the rest of the evening catching up with Gabe, talking about the babies and our plans for the nursery and so on. He was really excited for us, and I knew we could expect to see a lot more of him after they arrived. I think he and Santana both were happy to have a little bit more family, and I absolutely had no problem with him wanting to spend as much time as he wanted with his nieces and/or nephews.

Shortly after that, we went to Lima to visit my parents. We decided to do the reveal a little bit differently this time. We made copies of our first ultrasound pictures and had two frames made, one that said 'Baby Lopez 1' and the other was 'Baby Lopez 2.' We gave each of my parents a gift bag that had a frame in it and told them to open them at the same time.

There was a slight bit of confusion at first before they figured out that we were having twins. My mother just somehow knew straight away that Santana was the one carrying. It may have been because I was wearing a tight top while Santana was wearing a baggy shirt and was hugging a pillow in front of her stomach at first. My parents both were so happy for us, and my dad even teared up a little.

My mom couldn't get enough of touching Santana's bump, and my wife just beamed happily the whole time. I knew she was imagining what her own parents would have acted like if they had been around for us to tell, so I took her hand tightly in mine and brought it to my lips to press a kiss to it. She looked at me lovingly and I could see how happy she was to be able to have this, even if this family wasn't related by blood.

I called and told Bonnie after that, who squealed over the phone in delight. She was excited that we were going to have kids close in age, and she was happy that I was finally going to be able to be a mom. She told me that she was glad for us, and that Santana was the best thing that could have happened in my life. I couldn't have agreed more.

As Santana's bump grew bigger, so did her appetites. She craved a lot of apples and red meat, so we were going through a lot of apples and I had difficulty coming up with enough recipes to include different ways to serve beef. I refused to let her eat too much beef since she needed to eat a healthy, balanced diet, but I did try to cater to her craving by incorporating small servings several times a week. I couldn't control how she ate when I wasn't with her, but I did my best.

Santana was always a very sexual person with me, and her desire was heightened as her second trimester progressed. She was horny a lot, and I did my best to satisfy her. I was often left exhausted and sore, but I wouldn't complain. Santana noticed how tired I was getting, so she refused to let me touch her for several days. She promised to tone it down, which was both a relief and disappointment. I felt like I couldn't keep up enough to satisfy her, but I knew my body could only take so much. We worked it out, and our sex life improved dramatically.

Santana became a bit concerned about her weight, though I did my best to assure her that she looked gorgeous. Dr. Lennox made sure to tell her that her weight gain was absolutely within normal, healthy limits, and if she had gained less than she was then he would actually be worried. Not that she was unhealthy at all, but he wanted to make it clear that she shouldn't worry about putting on weight. It was easier said than done to convince her that she wasn't fat, especially when her hormones started to get to her.

"I am such a whale, Britt," she whined one night. "No, that's a lie. A whale can actually swim, and I can't even do that anymore."

Santana had resumed swimming with me after the doctor told her that it would be good exercise, as long as she didn't overdo it. But as she got bigger and more easily worn out with exertion, she couldn't do much. She mostly did a little bit of water aerobics, which I joined in on since they were good on my joints.

"Baby, you are not a whale," I told her honestly. "You are absolutely beautiful. You are carrying our babies and I love your gorgeous belly."

"Yeah, well, that's only because you're not the one lugging around these kids and getting fat," Santana bit out.

I jerked back in hurt. Santana immediately looked apologetic, reaching out to me to keep me from walking away, although I hadn't intended to. Her eyes teared up, a common occurrence when her hormones were wreaking havoc, much like when she got drunk.

"God, Brittany, I am so sorry," she apologized. "I didn't mean it. You know I didn't."

"I know, San," I said, taking her hand that had gripped my forearm and holding it. "I know you didn't mean anything by it."

"I swear I didn't," Santana continued, her voice shaky.

"Baby, relax," I told her soothingly. "I promise you, it's okay. You know I would carry our babies if I could, but that is why I have so much love and admiration for the fact that you are doing it for us. I get that you're emotional and hormonal, and I can easily live with that. What I can't live with is you thinking you are anything but beautiful. You are not fat, you are pregnant with twins. _Our_ twins. It is the most beautiful thing in the world."

Santana started to cry, and I pulled her into my arms. I was familiar with this routine by now.

"I love you so much," she sobbed. "I love our babies so much."

She continued with her sobs and I murmured loving words until she calmed down. Her breakdowns were pretty common. They happened at least once a week, and she sometimes had to hide at work to keep her coworkers from seeing. They all knew she was pregnant now, since she was evidently showing, but she still didn't want them to know _everything_ that went on with her pregnancy.

The weeks went on, and we planned for our babies. Santana became obsessed with reading pregnancy books, while I preferred to do more online research and talk things over with Gus since he had already raised kids of his own. He would offer me a unique perspective as the spouse of the pregnant woman, which I desperately needed.

It was an amazing day when we found out the sexes. The twins hadn't cooperated at 16 weeks, and we hoped that the 20 week ultrasound appointment would be a success. To our delight, it was. We would have been completely happy with any gender combination, but we were ecstatic when we were told we were having a boy and a girl. Having one of each was perfect.

We had been discussing names for awhile. We had many names that we liked, so it was a matter of picking the ones we both liked the best. Neither of us wanted to rush into the decision, so we took our time. Time seemed to be moving faster than either of us had pictured though, and it was becoming evident that we were going to need to be making decisions once Santana was almost in her third trimester.

Both of us had spent so much time focusing on the pregnancy and keeping Santana comfortable and the babies healthy. We had concentrated on finishing up the nursery and getting the things we would need for the arrival of our baby boy and baby girl, but we hadn't thought much about the actual physical beings that would be our children once they arrived.

As Santana got bigger and we kept seeing our babies on the ultrasound at each appointment, it really started to sink in. Santana was carrying two tiny human beings inside of her. Two tiny human beings that would be here in a few short months. Two tiny human beings that needed to be cared for around the clock. They needed to be fed, bathed, changed, clothed, and, before any of that, they needed to be named.

We started our discussions again, yet I was kind of disappointed when Santana hadn't brought up two names that I had kind of expected.

"San?" I asked, getting her attention from her book. She was sprawled out on her back on the couch with her head in my lap and I had my feet up on the coffee table while I watched a movie. Her book was propped up on her gorgeous big belly that I had one hand resting on, feeling any little movement of our twins, while the other combed gently through her hair as she read.

"Yeah?"

"Is there a reason why you haven't suggested your parents' names for the twins?" I asked cautiously.

Santana sat still for a moment before closing her book slowly. It was too hard for her to sit up, so she tilted her head back to look up at me. I never stopped running my fingers through her beautiful hair, hoping to comfort both of us for what I figured would be a bit of an emotional conversation.

"I don't know," she admitted quietly. "Like, sometimes I feel like I want to keep their memory alive, but other times I'm afraid that, if I hear their names every day, then it will make me too sad."

"Oh, baby," I cooed softly, rubbing her belly soothingly. "Don't you already think about them every day?"

"I do," she confirmed, her voice a little shaky. "But it would be different if I heard their names. Almost as if they were still here." She paused, swallowing hard. "I know it's crazy. They've been gone for such a long time, but… I can't help but feel like they will still walk through the door or call me."

"I know that you miss them so much, and it is perfectly normal to still hold them in your heart. Which is why I think it would be great if we named the twins after them," I said.

"Britt, I don't know if I can," Santana protested, her brow furrowing.

"Hear me out, please?" Santana nodded reluctantly. "We don't need to use their names as the twins' first names. We can still honor your parents by giving the twins their names as their middle names. That way you won't have to hear them on a daily basis and it also gives our babies a connection to the grandparents they will never know."

Santana's eyes watered and she sucked her lips in to try to fight her surge of emotions. I leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"Would that be okay?" I asked gently as I sat back up, resuming my combing of her hair. It really helped to calm me.

Santana nodded, letting out a shaky breath. "I think their abuelo and abuela would love that."

I smiled sweetly down at her, seeing the love shining in her eyes. I felt overwhelmed at how much she loved me. I had never thought I would have anything like this in my life. Especially after Sam died.

"I'm glad. I think they would, too."

"I don't think you could be any more perfect, do you know that?"

I laughed a little. "I am far from perfect, Tana. You're the perfect one. You and our babies."

"Lies!" Santana exclaimed playfully, reaching up to poke me gently in the ribs.

"Hey! No exerting yourself," I scolded, fighting giggles as she tickled me.

"Fine," she huffed. "But only because I'm tired."

"Whatever works," I said happily. "So now that we figured out their middle names, I think we should maybe decide on their first names."

"Babe," Santana whined. "We've talked about this so many times."

"I know, but we still haven't made a decision," I argued.

Santana tossed her book over onto the coffee table. "I don't know why, considering we both like the same names."

"You know that it is a big deal, and we have to be sure. I mean, I wouldn't want to saddle our son with a name like 'Dick' that will only get him ridiculed his whole life," I joked.

Santana made a face. "Ugh, gross," she said. "Britt, seriously. We both like the same names, so why don't we just decide already?"

I sighed. "Okay, okay. So your favorite boy name is Declan, right?"

"Yes, you know this, because it is your favorite, too."

"I was just making sure," I defended. "I wanted to check that nothing had changed since the last time we talked about it. So is Declan Ricardo the name we're going with for our son?"

Santana smiled a little, her dimples peeking out just slightly. "Yeah," she said almost dreamily. "I like that. I can picture our little Declan."

I grinned. "I can too. This is making it more real, isn't it?"

She nodded up at me. "It is," she agreed. "You still like Norah the best, right?"

"Yeah. Is it still your favorite?"

"Yeah," she confirmed. "Norah Carmen, then?"

I nodded, tears stinging my eyes. "She's going to be beautiful."

"Fudge, Britt," Santana complained, waving her hand in front of her face to try to not cry. "Don't get me going. My emotions are all over the place."

I laughed at her word choice to avoid cursing, and I wiped the tears away at the corner of my eyes.

"I'm sorry, Santana. It's kind of hard not to get emotional when we just named our babies."

"I know, but I already cried in the bathroom at work today over a freaking video somebody posted on Facebook. I really don't want to cry again."

I nodded in sympathy. "That was a really amazing video," I said. "That dog saving all of those people!"

"Brittany!" Santana exclaimed, hitting my leg as she started tearing up again. "Stop!"

"I'm sorry, baby," I apologized, leaning down to pepper kisses over her face, speaking in between pecks. "I didn't mean to make you think about it."

"You better be sorry," Santana pouted before pursing her lips in indication that she wanted me to kiss her lips.

"So completely sorry," I murmured before bringing my lips to hers, kissing her sweetly. Santana's hand came up to cup the back of my head and hold me to her when I would have pulled away. She sucked my bottom lip into her mouth and ran her tongue along it, sending a tingle of desire through me. She released it and pressed another kiss to my mouth before letting me go.

She smirked up at me, knowing just what she could do to me. "Since we're making important decisions on what to call everyone today, what do you want the kids to call us?"

I shrugged, rubbing my hand on her belly again as I thought about our babies growing inside. "I don't know. What do you want them to call you?"

"Well, I called my mother mami, so I kind of thought they could call me that since that was how I grew up," Santana suggested.

"I think that would be perfect," I agreed with a smile. "I guess that means I shouldn't be mommy, since that could be confusing."

Santana frowned a little. "I didn't think of that. I don't have to be mami if you would rather be mommy."

"No, no, no," I stopped her. "You should definitely be mami. I think I would be just fine being called mama anyways."

"You promise it won't bother you not being called mommy?" Santana asked.

"I promise," I said honestly. "As long as they know that I'm their mother, too. That's all I really care about."

Santana laid her hand over mine on her belly, caressing my skin with her thumb. "They will absolutely know that you're their mother, Britt," Santana swore. "We are going to raise these babies together, with all of the love we have for each other and for them, and they will definitely know that you are their other mother. Even if you don't share any DNA, you are their mama and they will love you so much."

I let out a relieved breath that I didn't realize I had been holding. I honestly didn't even realize that I had been worried about not having that connection with our children. But Santana had chased my fears away. I knew that I loved our babies so much already, and they will be raised by us in love so they would love the both of us too.

"I love you," I told her, caressing her cheek before turning to her belly and leaning over to press a kiss to it. "And I love you both, Declan and Norah. Your mami and mama love you so much."

"We all love you too," Santana replied. "But we are all tired now, so we want mama to take us to bed and cuddle us."

"I would love nothing more," I told her happily, and proceeded to do just that.

 **A/N: Another fluffy chapter for you all! Lots of things happened in this chapter. We had Brittany and Santana spreading the news of the pregnancy. Of course they would tell Gabe about the babies first. I know many of you predicted that correctly. What did you guys think of his reaction? What about Brittany's parents?**

 **We had the reveal of the sexes, and they are having a boy and a girl which some of you predicted as well! I know some people wanted two girls, so sorry to disappoint on that! Who is happy about having one of each though?**

 **We had the picking of the names for the babies, and deciding on what the babies will call their mommies. And they decided to stay in their house for the time being. Lots of decisions in all that fluffiness.**

 **What did you guys think? Happy times for our girls with their babies on the way! Only one more chapter left!**


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

"Britt," Santana whined. "Help me up."

I reached down and grasped Santana's hand reaching up from the bed with a chuckle. Santana's big belly was making it hard for her to do much of anything anymore, and getting up from sitting or lying down was a struggle for her. I tugged her up to a sitting position with a bit of effort and she swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She pushed herself off and stood up, only to stumble a bit.

I wrapped my arms around her and sat her back on the bed, sitting beside her in concern. "You okay Tana?"

She gave me a small smile, but I could see the hint of worry in her eyes. "Yeah," she said. "Just got a little dizzy there."

I studied her for a moment, trying to see if she was holding anything back. I couldn't see anything. "Are you sure?"

She nodded. "I think the twins just need some food," she chuckled.

"Okay," I said cautiously. "I will go make sure you all get some food then." I put my hands on her stomach and directed my next words to the babies inside. "And you two need to be good for your mami. Help mama take care of her and don't make her dizzy, okay?"

I felt the movement beneath my hands and I grinned.

"I think they are either agreeing with you passionately or they are protesting your demand," Santana said, grimacing slightly. "One of them is digging into my liver."

I winced in sympathy. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

Santana chuckled. "I am constantly uncomfortable. It is the price I pay for carrying twins. But I think they like the sound of your voice. They are always more active when you talk to them."

The thought that they moved more when I talked to them made me indescribably happy. I hoped it meant they recognized me as their mama. "Well right now I need them to take a little nap so they give you a bit of a rest. Do you think you will be okay to walk into the kitchen so I can make breakfast?"

"Just help me back up and I'll be good."

I stood up and pulled Santana to her feet again, relieved to see this time that she didn't stumble at all. We headed to the kitchen and I pulled out some eggs and bacon. I started preheating a pan on the stove and got out an apple. I cut it into wedges and took them over to Santana, who happily started to eat them. I started frying up the bacon while she ate her fruit.

Once the food was done cooking, I plated up some scrambled eggs and bacon for Santana and took the plate and some juice to her before going back and getting some for myself. I went back to the table and sat with her while we enjoyed our Sunday morning breakfast.

"I don't want to go back to work tomorrow," Santana complained after she finished her bacon and eggs.

"Are you still hungry?" I asked. She shook her head, so I picked her empty plate up with mine and took them to the sink to rinse. "I know you don't want to go, and to be honest with you, I'm getting a little worried that you are still going in. I mean, you're seven months pregnant with twins. You're exhausted most of the time, and I don't want you getting worn out."

"Babe, everything is okay," Santana said calmly. "Dr. Lennox just gave me a clean bill of health this week and said D and Norah are doing great. Besides, I'm only going to be working for another month or so anyways."

I put the plates in the dishwasher and returned to the table with some more water for myself. "I know, but I can't help but worry that you're working yourself too hard."

"Work already let me change my hours so I could get a ride with you, which makes everything a lot easier on me. I really don't want to tell them I want to cut my hours on top of it," Santana said.

"I know I'm being overprotective, but I can't really help it," I said quietly, looking at the table top.

"And I love you for it," Santana told me. "But I promise that I am okay. I will tell you if it is too much for me."

I smiled gratefully and relaxed a little. "Thank you," I said. "Do you really think you are going to be able to work another month though?"

Santana shrugged, biting her lip thoughtfully. "I don't know. But we will cross that bridge when we come to it."

I nodded and, to my relief, we went to the living room to commence our lazy Sunday.

For the past month or so, things had gotten harder with Santana's pregnancy. The summer heat had worn her down, especially as her pregnancy progressed. We still hadn't escaped the warm temperatures yet, so she seemed to have her energy sapped from the minute she woke up until she was exhausted by the end of the day.

It wasn't so bad when Gabe was around. He had stopped by nearly every day, which helped keep Santana's spirits up, and he helped me out around the house. He would either bring us dinner or help me clean and do laundry. The biggest things he had done were to help us set up the nursery and get all of the baby furniture in place. He was such a major asset to the both of us, and it sucked when he had to go back to Nashville for training.

My mom and dad had come by a few times to visit, and it was nice to see them, but I couldn't ask them to hang around to help out. It wasn't that I couldn't handle it all. I could do all of the cooking and the cleaning and taking care of my pregnant wife. I was just worried that, if I became too stressed, then I would get too weak to take care of Santana. And if I got too weak and Santana needed help, I didn't know what would happen. And that scared me more than anything.

Santana knew how worried I got, and she did her best to keep me relaxed. She made me laugh and kept me distracted as best as she could in an effort to keep me as stress-free as possible. She knew I needed to not freak out about everything, which she reminded me of regularly. It was easier said than done to push my worries away.

But I did my best so I could be the wife Santana needed me to be. I took care of her. I made her rest when she was tired. I rubbed her aching feet and back. I took baths with her to help her sore muscles. I put lotion on her belly every night to try to help with the stretch marks. I drove her to and from work and doctor appointments and helped her do research on pediatricians and baby toys and car seats. I kissed her and cuddled her and showered her with all of the love I possessed. And I made sure to talk to Declan and Norah and do the same with them.

I could see the love and appreciation from Santana at everything I did. She knew how hard I was working for her and our family. Just like she had done for me when I needed it. I knew things weren't going to relax when the babies were born, but at least they would be here and I would feel like I had accomplished my goal.

I was looking forward to the baby shower next weekend. It was being thrown by Kyle and Sandy, and it meant that I had to do nothing but show up with Santana and help her open presents. We had already bought a bunch of stuff for the babies, but with having two on the way, we definitely could use all of the help we could get with buying more baby stuff. We had gotten most of the big stuff, such as the nursery furniture and bedding and a double stroller, but we needed a lot of clothes and diapers and a lot of the day to day essentials.

I knew my parents were going to spoil the twins. Bonnie had just given birth less than two months ago to a baby girl they named Charlotte, and little Charlie was adorable. I had only seen pictures of her since Santana and I couldn't travel down to Georgia, but her little tuft of blonde hair and blue eyes made her look so cute. And my parents had already bought Charlie a whole new wardrobe, plus toys galore. I just knew that they were going to go overboard with the twins since they were my first children.

I was overwhelmed once the baby shower had finished. Not only did they buy tons of clothes and toys and other supplies for Norah and Declan, but my dad had actually made two rocking chairs with their names engraved on the headrest. He told me, with tears in our eyes, that they were meant to be so Santana and I could rock the babies at the same time and that the twins would have an heirloom for when they got older.

Santana cried, hugging my dad tightly and thanking him profusely. I did the same, so proud of how far my father had come in accepting my relationship with Santana. He was proud of us, and he was excited to meet his new grandchildren. It was so much.

The baby shower was definitely a success, and Santana and I walked away with tons of clothes, toys, and other items we didn't even know we would need or want but were extremely grateful to get. We didn't even have a lot of people at the shower, considering my only friends were really Gus and Sandy, plus Kyle and his boyfriend, who were Santana's friends really. The rest of the guests were my parents, and Santana's friends, most of whom she wasn't really close to anymore. But they showed up and they gave us so, so much to be thankful for.

We were finally ready for our babies to arrive. We had everything we needed. We were mentally and emotionally prepared. And I was pretty sure Santana was physically prepared to get them out of her as soon as possible if her constant grumbling was anything to go by. But, as much as she complained, she mostly just wanted to meet them and actually see their little faces and count their tiny fingers and toes.

"What do you think they are going to look like?" Santana asked me the day after the shower while we were relaxing in the tub together.

"If we're lucky they will look just like their mami," I told her, kissing the side of her head as she relaxed back into me.

"But I want them to look like you," Santana whined.

I chuckled. "San, I am pretty sure it is impossible for them to look like me. I mean, they might end up with some of the same features I have, but I don't think you are going to get a little mini me running around."

"But you're my favorite person to look at," Santana pouted.

"Well you're my favorite person to look at, so if they look like you then I'm all good," I said happily.

"I just keep imagining them with your blue eyes and a girl with blonde hair," Santana said dreamily. "I don't want to give that picture up."

"We don't know what they're going to look like," I told her softly. "And no matter what we may have pictured, we won't know until they're born and start to grow. I just know that, regardless of their hair color or eye color or whatever, they are going to be ours and they will be beautiful."

"I know they will," she agreed.

"So you won't be disappointed if they don't look like me?" I asked.

"Maybe a little," she admitted, then giggled when I poked her ribs gently. "No, I promise I will be perfectly happy whatever they look like."

"Good." I wrapped my arms a little tighter around her, feeling one of the babies press against my hand.

"Do you think the dogs and Tubbs are going to get along with them?"

I had gotten used to Santana asking out of the blue questions related to the twins. She had asked once if I thought they would like other fruits since she had eaten so many apples during her pregnancy.

"Yeah," I said. "Well, Lord Tubbington might be a little standoffish at first, but you know how he can be."

Santana chuckled. "Yeah, as long as he doesn't smother them first then we will be okay."

"Mmm, yeah we might have to watch that," I joked. "But I know the dogs will be just fine. You know how Lady is always hovering around you, making sure you're okay. And Lance is such a gentle, loving dog. He is always the first one to cuddle one of us when we need it."

"You're right," Santana murmured. "Lady does help a lot by standing in front of me when I need something to push up on to get up. And she is good to lean on when I walk."

I laughed a little. "She definitely claimed you as her favorite mom. And I know she is going to be all about those babies when they get here. Nobody will touch them without our permission if Lady has anything to say about it."

"They're good dogs, Britt," Santana said, tilting her head back to look at me. "You did such a good job raising them that I know you're going to be a great mom to our kids."

I got a warm feeling in my chest at Santana's confidence in my parenting skills. I hoped I could only be as good of a mom as I knew she would be.

"Come on, let's get out before you turn into a prune," I said.

Santana whined a little, but acquiesced, and I helped her out of the tub. I helped her dry off, and she helped me dry off, which led to a little bit of lingering touches, which ultimately led to us moving to the bed as our desire took over. Santana had enough energy after I made her come to give me an orgasm before promptly falling asleep. I smiled as she snored a little, pressing a kiss to her forehead as I got out of bed and threw on some clothes to let the dogs out one more time before bed.

Lady was already waiting patiently at the end of the bed, one watchful eye on Santana sleeping. She followed me easily though, and Lance got up from where he was lying by the bedroom door to follow me out. I knew that the dogs would get a little less attention when the twins arrived, so I did my best to shower them with love until then. Santana did the same, and we made a promise to continue to treat the dogs and cat and give them lots of love even if we didn't get to play with them as much.

After taking care of the animals and giving them some hearty kisses, I went back to bed and wrapped myself around Santana and our babies. I was so happy with my family.

A couple of weeks later found Santana no longer working. It was just too hard on her, and since she was due in about six weeks, I told her it was best she just stay home and give her body time to rest before she has to push out our twins. We both knew that it was highly possible that the twins would come early, so I didn't want to risk her being at work when her labor started. Dr. Lennox agreed that Santana should go ahead and go on maternity leave since she was so physically exhausted by midday at work.

I had to admit that I was extremely relieved to not have to worry about Santana throughout the day. I called and texted her a lot while I was at work, and she made sure to keep in touch. I noticed within the first couple days of her staying home how much more energy she had when I got home from work in the evenings as compared to when she was working. She seemed a lot happier and more relaxed too, which helped me relieve some of the stress I had.

Santana appeared to be nesting. She was rearranging stuff in the nursery and moving clothes around in the wardrobes to something other than we had originally ordered them. She was definitely getting ready for the twins' arrival. She was so uncomfortable most days now carrying them that I knew she was counting down the days. I sympathized with her, and I definitely didn't like seeing her so uncomfortable, but we both knew it was going to be worth it in the end.

"So is Santana about ready for those babies to arrive?" Gus asked me at work late in October.

I grinned at him. "She is definitely getting restless," I said. "If she could, I think she'd have them right now. But we are both anxious to see them."

Gus gave me a friendly grin back. "I know you both are going to feel like it is going to take forever until they get here, but they will be here before you know it."

"It does feel like it is taking so long," I agreed. "I just can't wait to hold them and kiss them and even listen to them cry."

Gus looked at me in understanding. "Just remember to cherish every moment, because it feels like one second they're babies and you blink and they are suddenly off to college."

"I'm sure it must be hard having the kids out of the house," I told him in sympathy.

He nodded and opened his mouth to speak, but the sound of my phone ringing interrupted him.

"Sorry, it's Santana," I said. Gus nodded understandingly and I took the call. "Hey San, how are the twins?"

"Britt," the broken voice on the line had my heart thudding in fear.

"Santana? Baby, what's wrong?" I asked frantically.

"Britt, I'm bleeding," Santana cried.

The words sent a stab of pain in my chest. She didn't need to clarify where she was bleeding from. Her tone of voice said it all. I started moving, not even consciously aware I was already grabbing my things and getting ready to leave.

"I'm on my way. Just hold on San, I'm coming, okay?"

"Hurry Britt, I need you," Santana whispered through the tears I knew were falling down her cheeks.

"I am coming baby," I promised, rushing toward my boss's office. "Did you call Dr. Lennox?"

"Not yet."

"I need you to go ahead and call his office and find out what he wants us to do. Then you call me back immediately. Okay?"

"Okay," she said quietly. "I'm scared."

The pain I heard in her whisper made my steps falter momentarily. "Me too," I said honestly. "But we can get through anything, I promise. I love you."

"I love you too," she replied, then disconnected the call.

I quickly explained to my boss what was going on and practically ran the whole way to the car. Keeping up with the swimming had really helped get me in shape, and I was able to get to my car without getting out of breath too badly. I honestly thought that most of my panting came from fear instead of actual physical exertion.

I had just started the car and pulled out of my space when Santana called back.

"Baby? Are you okay?"

"I'm okay," Santana told me. "I'm still bleeding, but I'm doing okay. Dr. Lennox said that I need to go to the hospital and he will meet me there. He said not to go to emergency but to go to the obstetrics floor. He is calling ahead."

"Alright. I'm leaving now, I will be there as soon as I can and I will take you to the hospital. Unless he said you need an ambulance?"

"No, he told me that since I am not having any cramping or dizziness that I should be okay to wait on you to get me. Just, please hurry."

"I promise you I am," I swore. "Just stay on the phone with me so I know you're okay."

"I don't even know what happened," Santana said, her tears coming back. "I was just lying on the couch not doing anything like all day. I got up to go pee and I saw the blood. It wasn't just a little spot…"

Santana trailed off and I swallowed hard. "It will be okay," I told her. I prayed it would. I didn't know what I would do if anything happened to her or our babies.

We stayed on the line with each other for my whole drive. I made it home in record time and pulled in behind Santana's new SUV. I hurried out of the car, leaving it running, as I rushed into the house and found Santana waiting by the door to the garage. I helped her out to the car, noticing how pale she looked and the fear in her eyes.

I drove quickly to the hospital, grateful that it wasn't too far away, and pulled up in front of the entrance. Someone helped Santana into a wheelchair and I promised I would be right back and I went to park the car out of the way.

I rushed back into the hospital and took the elevator to the proper floor. I asked the reception nurse where my wife was and she had someone escort me back to where Santana was. Dr. Lennox was already in there with her, much to my relief.

"I know you're scared right now, but I am going to take a look and see just what is causing this bleeding," he told Santana as I came up to her side and took her hand.

She clasped my hand tightly, and Dr. Lennox gave me a nod in acknowledgement. I noticed he had his professional mask on, which was an unusual change for him. He was usually very friendly and smiley with us. The change in his behavior worried me.

Dr. Lennox examined her, took note of the amount of bleeding that Santana had tried to absorb with a pad, and Santana and I squeezed each other's hands in fear the whole time.

"It appears you have something called placenta previa," he finally explained. "It can sometimes happen when carrying more than one baby. Usually we just need to put a patient on bed rest, but, with this level of bleeding, I would recommend that we keep you on bed rest in the hospital so we can keep a closer eye on you. If anything worsens or you start having other complications then we may have to do a C-section to get the babies out so they and you are no longer at risk."

I felt like panicking, but I fought to remain calm for Santana. I could see the fear grow in her eyes.

"But it's too early. They can't be born yet!" Santana protested in panic.

I tried rubbing her arm soothingly as she squeezed my hand painfully. I felt like reacting the same way as her, but I couldn't. I needed to be strong.

"I know it's early, but they are 36 weeks so they will be okay to come out now if need be," Dr. Lennox said calmly. "My priority is your safety and the safety of your babies. So if it becomes necessary to save your lives, then it is what we need to do. The risks for delivering them early are much lower this far along."

"But the risks associated with an emergency C-section are high," I said. I immediately regretted my words when Santana looked at me with dread.

"There are risks with any surgery. That is correct. But the risks of not doing the surgery, if I deem it necessary, are much worse than if we did the C-section," he said. "But this is all hypothetical at the moment. I am hoping that the bed rest will help stop the bleeding and we will continue to monitor you closely."

We indicated that we understood and Dr. Lennox left us. I sat down on the bed with Santana, pulling her into my arms. She started crying again and I allowed myself a few tears as I held her, pressing kisses into her hair. We both finally calmed down and Santana fell asleep.

She woke up thirty minutes later when a nurse came in to check on us and to get the paperwork filled out for Santana to be admitted. I filled out the forms and tried to distract Santana, but it wasn't working all that well.

"Are you going to be okay if I head to the house really quickly? I figured I could go bring you some pajamas and sweats to wear so you don't have to live in just a hospital gown."

She gave me a small smile and nodded. I kissed her several times, reluctant to leave, but I eventually did. I took care of the dogs and changed, grabbing a bag of clothes for Santana plus her toothbrush and other toiletry essentials. I called Gabe and filled him in, and he insisted on coming back to Columbus to be there for her despite my protests. I knew he wouldn't listen anyways, not when his sister was scared. I also called my parents to let them know what was going on, and I promised to keep them updated. I hurried back to the hospital and immediately got back on the bed with Santana, who leaned into me so I could hold her again.

"I'm so sorry," Santana said quietly.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," I told her. "This wasn't your fault, San. It will all be okay."

I ran my fingers through her hair comfortingly, as I loved to do. She sniffled a little, but she seemed to be through with the crying.

"I just feel like I could have done something different and this wouldn't have happened."

"You heard Dr. Lennox. This just happens sometimes. There wasn't anything we could do. But he is going to make sure that nothing happens to you or the babies."

She made a noise of agreement in her throat. "He is pretty good."

"He is," I agreed. "How are you feeling?"

"A little tired, but okay," she said.

"Don't scare me like that again, okay?" I asked, half joking. I turned my head and kissed her forehead.

"I'll try not to," she murmured sleepily.

"Get some sleep," I hushed, and it wasn't long before I heard her breaths even out in slumber.

I ended up falling asleep but was awoken a couple hours later by Santana shifting next to me. I figured she was just adjusting her position, but then I heard a whimper. My eyes shot open and I sat up to look at her.

"Santana? Are you okay?" I asked, my voice a little fearful.

"I just have some pain," she said with a grimace. "I'm not feeling so good."

All of a sudden her face paled and her eyes rolled back. The machines she was hooked up to started beeping like crazy and I swore my heart stopped.

"Santana? San?" I asked, shaking her a little. "Santana! Answer me!"

I was freaking out and crying. She wouldn't answer me at all. The machines were going off and I knew something was seriously wrong. I got out of bed and ran to the door, yelling for a nurse. Thankfully they were already on their way to the room. I was rushed by as they huddled around my wife. They moved the blankets and that was when I saw the blood.

"Oh God," I whispered. I was sobbing now and the nurses were talking around me. A doctor may have come in, but I wasn't even aware anymore. My eyes were focused on the unresponsive form of Santana on the bed.

"Mrs. Lopez!" The loud voice got my attention. Apparently the nurse had been trying to get my attention several times. "We are going to need you to step out now."

"What is going on? What are you doing with her?" I asked, my voice eerily calm.

"The doctor needs to take her up for a C-section so we can get the babies out," she told me.

"Is she going to be okay? Are they going to be okay?"

"We are going to do everything we can to make sure they are, but we need you to step out now so we can get her up to surgery. Okay?"

She led me out to the hall, though I protested, and left me there. It hit me then that I was in serious danger of losing my family. My wife was in danger, bleeding on her hospital bed. And our children were at risk, needing to be cut out of her belly.

The staff rolled Santana's bed out of the room in a hurry. I wanted to follow but I was frozen. She looked so pale and small in that bed.

My heart was pounding, the thought of never seeing the love of my life again sending fear throughout my body. I was sobbing uncontrollably. I couldn't lose her. I couldn't go through this again. This was way worse than before. I didn't think I would be able to survive without her.

"Santana," I tried to cry out after her, but only a breathy sob erupted.

They disappeared around the corner and my legs gave out beneath me. I dropped to my knees, and I fought for breath. My sobbing was making it hard to breathe and my muscles didn't want to work. The stress of the day was really starting to affect me. Oh wait, when was the last time I took my pill? I couldn't remember.

And I couldn't breathe. _I couldn't breathe_. I struggled to suck air into my lungs but the muscles wouldn't work. I tried to call out for help. I tried to lift my arm to get someone's attention. I wanted to see Santana. I wanted to see our babies. I wanted to breathe.

My muscles completely gave out and I hit the ground, trying to break my fall with my hands unsuccessfully. My breath was completely gone. My last thought was of Santana's beautiful face as everything went black.

 **A/N: Please don't kill me! Yes, this is the last chapter, but there is an epilogue! I promise you will find out what happens!**

 **Kind of surprised by the lack of reviews from the last chapter, but I am suspecting that won't be the case with this one?**

 **I am just going to go hide now...**


	31. Epilogue

Epilogue

I stood in the kitchen washing dishes from the party. I knew they could wait, but I just needed some space. Everyone was probably wondering where I had run off to and thought it was strange that I wasn't in the other room right now with all of the guests celebrating.

I couldn't stop thinking about it, and thinking about it made me sad and angry. And nobody wants to be sad and angry when their children are celebrating their fifth birthday. So I needed to take a moment to myself to calm down and gather my thoughts so I could put on a smile as my kids opened their presents and ate their cake.

I had tried to put it behind me long ago, it was just hard. A day that should have been one of the happiest in my life had turned into a nightmare. I understood that I should be grateful that I didn't lose everything. I just could never stop remembering what had happened that day when the twins' birthday came around. It was as if my brain was programmed to dwell on the bad of that day instead of the good.

And so much good had happened since that day. The twins' first smiles and teeth. The first time they crawled and walked and their first words. Moving into a new house with more room. Christmases and Thanksgivings with family and vacations. I never had trouble being happy those days. It was just this day, and I hated feeling like I was ruining Declan and Norah's birthday.

"You're thinking about it, aren't you?"

A voice from the kitchen doorway broke me from my thoughts. I turned from the sink to see brown eyes looking at me in concern.

"Yeah," I replied guiltily. "I can't help it."

"You're lucky D and Norah are too happy it's their birthday to notice you aren't in the room. You need to get over this before long though, or they will start to catch on."

I sighed, a little frustrated at myself and the whole situation. "Gabe, I get it. Trust me, I do. I just need a few minutes to myself and I will be okay."

"You can't keep dwelling on the past," he said, pleadingly.

"I don't!" I protested. "At least not usually. It is just today. I hate that I do it, but I can't stop it right now. Maybe with more time."

"It's been five years, Tana," he countered.

I turned back to the sink, throwing the sponge in my hand down in anger. "Don't you think I know that?" I hissed at my brother. "I know exactly how long it's been! I know you're concerned, but bitching at me about it isn't going to change anything."

"I'm just concerned about you," Gabe said. "You still haven't come to terms with what happened that day."

"I am working on it," I said softly, my anger fleeing at his obvious worry for me. "I promise you, I will talk to someone about it if it continues."

"You know that she wouldn't like knowing that you keep dwelling on it," he told me.

I knew that. I knew it with every fiber of my being. Which is why I hated continuing to feel this way. I closed my eyes and gripped the edge of the counter as my frustration at myself grew.

I heard quiet footsteps behind me and I held back the biting remark I wanted to spit out to chase away the comfort my brother wanted to bestow on me. I felt a familiar presence at my back and soothing arms snake around my waist. I immediately relaxed into the embrace and leaned back, my stress and anger suddenly gone as if it had never been.

"He's right, you know," was murmured softly in my ear, a chin resting on my shoulder.

My eyes slowly opened and I turned my head to meet the beautiful blue gaze I knew better than anything else in my life. The scent I loved washed over me and I relaxed further into the arms around me.

"I know. I hate that I still get mad about that day. I know it upsets you," I told my wife, pleading with my eyes for her to understand that I never meant for this to happen.

"San, I understand that it was a difficult day," Brittany said, looking back at me with sympathy and love. "But you have to stop dwelling on the bad that happened and think about all of the good that happened that day. You made it through surgery fine. The twins were born healthy. And I ended up being okay."

I turned in her arms and wrapped mine around her neck tightly. I held her as the panic that I felt that day returned to me. It had been so hard waking up from surgery to find Gabe in the room instead of her. The fear had set in when I saw the worry on his face. My immediate thoughts had turned to the twins, but he assured me they were perfectly fine. It wasn't until I asked where Brittany was that his face fell and I knew it wasn't good.

He told me she had collapsed in the hallway when I had been taken away to surgery after I passed out. Her muscles had gotten too weak and she went into a crisis because she couldn't breathe. Thankfully a nurse saw her pretty quickly and noticed her medical bracelet. Brittany was rushed into ICU and put on a machine to breathe for her. I was so fucking scared that I was going to lose her.

I insisted on seeing her, much to the chagrin of my doctors and nurses. I absolutely refused to let them keep me away from my wife, and I loved my brother so much more when he staunchly stood by my side and fought for me. After seeing our babies and crying at how beautiful they were as I held them, I was wheeled down to Brittany's room where I almost died of heartbreak. She looked so weak and small hooked up to the machine, tubes hooked into her mouth as her chest rose and fell to the sounds of the breathing apparatus.

She wasn't awake, but Gabe wheeled me to her side and I held her hand tightly, willing her to open her eyes. Gabe had taken pictures of the babies and I wanted her to see them. I wanted her to see our beautiful family. I wanted her to open her eyes and look at me so I knew she would be okay.

Her neurologist came by shortly after I arrived in her room to fill me in on her condition. They were going to administer some sort of infusion treatments to hopefully bring her muscle strength back up and get her off of the respirator. He explained that the longer she was on the respirator, the riskier it became. I tried to be strong, but I was in pain and doped up from my own surgery and the hormones from having the twins and seeing them and the devastation of hearing that Brittany was in danger was too much for me. I wept.

Gabe tried to get me to go back to my room, but I refused at first. He told me that Brittany's parents were on their way because he had called them, and I thanked him for taking care of that. He said that they would be here for Brittany, but right now our babies needed me. I knew he was right. I needed to take care of Declan and Norah first, and then I could return to my wife.

It was a rough few days. I insisted on being with Brittany as much as I could when I wasn't with our babies. She had the tube in her mouth for a whole day breathing for her, and she still had it in when her eyes opened. She couldn't talk and tell me how happy she was to see me or how beautiful the twins were when I showed her their pictures. But I could see it in her eyes and in the tears that fell down her cheeks. I could feel it in the way she was able to barely squeeze my fingers. I was so relieved.

After the tube was removed, she still needed a couple more infusions to be able to get back to being strong enough to be released. That was okay though, because I still needed time to recover from my surgery and the twins were being monitored since they were born early. They were totally healthy, to my relief, but they still hadn't gone full term. As Brittany improved, my spirits did as well. And when she finally got to hold the twins for the first time, she was so happy and in love with them.

Everything drastically improved after that. Going back home and getting into a routine with Declan and Norah helped. We were both completely smitten with our babies, and our love for each other was stronger than ever. I watched Brittany closely, looking for any sign of a setback, but she was doing as well as she was before that day. But when the twins' first birthday rolled around, it all came crashing on me again at how I almost lost everything. Seeing Brittany like that and seeing her struggle to overcome her crisis was the worst thing I had ever had to do. And I couldn't stop thinking about it as we tried to celebrate with the babies and our family.

It continued to happen every year after that, and I knew it was a problem. Brittany always told me to focus on the good. We all made it out of that day fine. Brittany had almost lost everything just as I did, and she looked at it in a positive way. We still had each other. The twins didn't lose their parents and Brittany and I didn't lose each other or our children. We ended up with a beautiful, happy, loving family.

I knew that I should be grateful. And I totally was most of the time.

"It was just so hard, Britt," I breathed into her neck. "To think that I could have lost you that day. Or the twins. It just scares me so much when I think about it, and I can't help but think about it on the anniversary of that day."

Brittany's hands rubbed my back soothingly as she pressed a kiss to my head. "I know it was scary, but it's over baby. If you are still having a hard time dealing with it, then maybe you should talk to a counselor."

I relaxed my hold and pulled back, looking at her in contemplation. She was probably right. She was concerned enough about me to mention it, so I figured it was probably past time. "Okay," I said. "I think that is a good idea."

Brittany smiled at me, and my heart skipped a beat. It usually did whenever she smiled at me or looked at me in that special way. The one where she looked at me like I was the most special thing in all the world. She looked at Declan and Norah kind of like that too, but not quite the same way she did with me.

"We should probably get back to the party," she said. "D and Norah were impatient to open presents, and you know if they pester Gabe long enough he will let them go at it."

I gave a little laugh, knowing she was absolutely right. But I didn't want to leave just yet. "Hold me for a minute longer, then we can go."

"Anything for you, San," she promised, pulling me back into her body.

I relaxed into her, wrapping my arms around her and laying my head against her shoulder.

"I love you," I said, breathing in her scent deeply.

"I love you, too."

"Mami! Mama! Tio Gabe said you need to come so we can open presents!"

Brittany and I parted to turn toward our son, who was running toward us impatiently. His midnight hair bounced over his forehead and his brown eyes sparkled in delight with it being his birthday. He ran up to me and hugged my leg, looking up at me with a smile that was just like Brittany's. He had a nose like hers and her smile, but the rest of his looks he got from me. He was the sweetest little boy, always thoughtful of others. It was no question, when we started to see their personalities develop, that he would get the otter.

"Hey, D," I greeted him, running my fingers through his unruly curls. "Are you guys getting impatient?"

He nodded, squeezing my leg tighter. He was definitely a mami's boy. He melted my heart, much like his mama did.

"Where's your sister?" Brittany asked, just before Gabe walked back into the kitchen with said girl on his back.

"Mama! You said you were going to bring mami back!" Norah said petulantly.

"We were just on our way baby girl," Brittany told our daughter as Gabe set her on the floor.

Norah crossed her arms over her chest and pouted as she stood in front of us. She was definitely our little tiger. She looked a lot like her brother, with a few differences. Her hair was lighter than Declan's, a dark brown with flashes of blonde when the light hit it just right. Her eyes were something unique- they ranged anywhere from grey to blue to green. She inherited my attitude (the one that always seemed to disappear around my wife), and she, much like me, would always melt around Brittany.

"I wanna open presents," Norah whined.

"We'll be there in a minute," I said to her, only to have her scowl at me.

"Norah, don't look at your mami like that," Brittany scolded as she knelt in front of her. "We said we would be there in just a minute, so why don't you have Uncle Gabe take you back out to the living room and maybe you can pester him to find out when he and your Aunt Jess are going to give you some little cousins to play with."

Norah's eyes lit up in delight, and she turned toward my brother with an evil grin. He gave a playful glare to Brittany, but turned a smile to our daughter.

"Come on, Nor," he said, holding out his hand. "Maybe we can sneak a present or two in before your moms make it there."

"Go on, D," Brittany told our son, ruffling his hair as she stood up. He grinned up at her and dutifully ran after his sister and uncle.

I couldn't stop the smile I got from watching my family. I was so happy for my brother. He had met a wonderful girl a few years back that made him fall hard. She reminded me a lot of Brittany, actually. It was pretty funny. Although they weren't so similar in looks, they both had startling blue eyes and their personalities were quite the same. Gabe married her just last year, and Brittany and I were both pestering them about having babies already.

"Are you feeling better?" Brittany asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.

I was kind of surprised to realize that I actually was. I grinned at her and pulled her into my arms. "Much better," I said before standing on my toes for a kiss.

Her soft mouth was on mine and the familiar tingles raced through my body. I would never get enough of her. Even after all of these years, she still produced the same exact feelings in me as she did in the very beginning.

I felt Brittany smile into the kiss, and I pulled away after a final peck.

"Are you ready to go back to the party?"

I nodded at her question and laced my fingers with hers. "Yeah. I think we might have a riot on our hands from Norah soon if we don't let them open presents."

Brittany chuckled, her blue eyes sparkling at me. "She's a lot like you with presents," she teased me. I couldn't even argue with that.

"Whatever," I said, rolling my eyes. "Let's go so we see our babies get spoiled."

She grinned and we walked out of the kitchen toward the living room, hands still linked tightly together. The living room in this house was much larger, a sunken room with lots of space for the twins to play on the floor. Right now, it was full of people. Brittany's parents were there, along with the pile of gifts they brought to spoil their grandchildren. Bonnie and her family had come up, and Norah was currently talking with Charlie. Declan was on his Aunt Jess' lap, leaning back into her as he talked her ear off about one thing or another. Kyle and his new boyfriend were there, standing over by the table with the masterpiece of a cake Kyle had made. Gus and Sandy were chatting up Brittany's parents (more like Sandy was talking to Brittany's mom while everyone listened). Gabe was standing behind his wife with a hand gently resting on her shoulder, smiling at me as Brittany and I walked into the room.

We were going to have another party where Declan's and Norah's friends could come next weekend, but this one was just for family. This was the one where we could celebrate our kids with the people who loved them the most, with the people we loved the most. As I looked around the room, seeing the happiness and joy on everyone's faces, I felt at peace. Brittany had brought everything right and good into my life. I honestly didn't know where I would be if Gabe had never hit on her at that bar all of those years ago.

Seeming to sense my emotions, Brittany let go of my hand and wrapped her arm around my shoulders. I leaned into her body and wrapped my own arm around her waist. I could picture us doing this again in another five years. And five years after that. And continuing to do so as our babies grew up. I couldn't wait to keep experiencing life with my family. Most especially with the woman beside me and our children. Brittany had made my life special and complete. She turned it from a dull, broken existence into something worth living.

She had once told me that meeting me had given her a second chance at living. I understood exactly what she meant. Life with Brittany was what my existence was supposed to be all along. Life before her was just being, and life after meeting her was me truly living. They were two completely separate lives.

"Let's go be with our family," Brittany said softly.

"Yeah," I answered. "Let's go."

We headed into the room and rounded up our kids so we could continue their birthday celebration. Norah sat next to me, curling into my side for a hug, while Declan kneeled by Brittany on the couch. Watching their faces light up as they opened their gifts and giving sincere thanks for them was perfect. Watching our family be happy was perfect. Our second life was perfect.

 **A/N: See, everything worked out just fine! You know I could never be that mean to you all, right? Although that cliffhanger definitely was something... (I'm sorry, but that was the plan all along with the story. Don't hate me!)**

 **I just wanted to say a massive THANK YOU to everyone who has stuck with me through this story, and everyone who has left comments giving me encouragement, motivation, or just plain good feelings, or even just giving a little note to say hey. This has been an incredible journey for me, and it means so much for me to get this story out there, and it means even more that people have read it and appreciated it! You guys are all amazing, and I appreciate you all so much!**

 **Now, many of you have expressed interest in a sequel. There is no official sequel, BUT this 'verse is definitely not dead! I have already written several one-shots chronicling the lives of the Lopez family, beginning with a very long one about Santana's reflections about her and Brittany's relationship. That will probably be posted sometime next week, so I hope you guys will check it out! The other one-shots will be posted sporadically, so make sure you follow me to keep up with when they are posted. I also am willing to take requests on what you guys might want to see with them, so feel free to send me a message with ideas and I will see what I can do.**

 **I am also currently writing a completely new AU Brittana story. It is more of a traditional romance, with much less of this kind of drama. But you know that romance stories have their own special kind of drama, so there will still definitely be some tension and ups and downs. I am nowhere near being ready to start posting it, but hopefully within the next month or two it will start going up. With this lovely snow storm going on right now, I should have a bit of time this weekend to work on it though lol.**

 **I hope to hear more from you guys when my new stuff comes out!**


End file.
